As You Wish

It appeared to her as a typical day. Estelle was delivering her usual catch of the day to the village’s castle to sell to one of the high lords who lived there. Afterwards, she would head down the sandy streets to the market and sell the rest, then return to her family’s fishing hut with the gold. Her older brother would be resting after being at sea, her mother cooking a stew for supper, and Estelle would sit by the fire to keep warm as they conversed.

As per usual the wind was picking up, the chilly breeze coming straight from the sea and blowing her light brown hair across her face, an aspect of life by the sea that no longer bothered her. It was as she paused to tuck a strand behind her ear that she saw him.

His dirty blonde hair hung down to his pale cheekbones and he was staring at her cart with an eager expression. Estelle could immediately tell that he was a highborn by the attire he wore, so she stopped staring at the striking young man and quickly bustled along with her fish. Her cheeks flushed as she thought about how dreamy he looked, but her lips curled downwards as she acknowledged that they would never be able to be together.

“Why hello there,” a deep voice said and Estelle looked up to see that the blonde man had approached her.

“Hello,” she replied, unsure of what more to say.

“I didn’t realise that our seafood was brought to us by such a beautiful woman,” the man remarked and Estelle’s cheeks reddened even more. The only person who had ever called her beautiful was her mother, but she never really believed her. Estelle knew that she looked like a lowborn: medium coloured hair that was not favoured, an odd shade of blue eyes, an average face with no standout features that definitely didn’t compare to the highborn women, and muscles and calloused skin from working instead of a thin frame and a delicate touch. She knew what beautiful was, and it wasn’t her reflection. “No reply?” Estelle’s jaw dropped as she realised that she had been too lost in her thoughts to conjure a response.

“Oh, I’m so sorry, I just-” she stammered, stopping as he laughed light-heartedly.

“My name is Drake. I arrived here a few days ago.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you,” Estelle nodded, still uncertain of how to speak to a highborn since it rarely happened. Drake looked expectantly at her and then it hit her what to do next. “I am Estelle.”

“Why, that’s a pretty name,” he remarked with a charming grin and Estelle almost swooned at how gorgeous he was. “You know, the reason I am here is to find a bride. My mother believes there might be someone suitable for me here. And I would like to see you again.” Estelle could hardly believe her ears. Her own mother would be delighted at the news and would no doubt encourage her to try to secure Drake as a husband.

“Well, I come here every single day to deliver my brother’s catch,” she said and Drake gave another brilliant smile.

“Then I will see you tomorrow,” he grinned before heading towards a lord of the village. Estelle lowered her head and continued trudging forwards, feeling as though it was her lucky day. She knew that she was being naïve for thinking that it was love at first sight, but there was a spark between them, she just knew it.

When Killian woke, it was to the sound and smell of fish cooking above his fire. The sunlight blinded him and made his head throb, his guts felt uneasy as he sat up, and his back was aching from lying on stones instead of his bed in his tent, but all of the negatives were eased when his eyes focused on Estelle. Her gloomy eyes shifted over to him as he noisily got to his feet.

“Good morning,” she muttered.

“Morning, love,” he replied before stumbling off into the bushes. After taking care of his business and having a long drink from the nearby stream, Killian sat next to Estelle and opened his mouth with the intent of making casual conversation.

“Thank you for not sleeping in your tent last night,” Estelle said before he could talk, uncertain of whether or not she should mention it.

“As you wished, my lady. I told you, I’m an honourable man,” he grumbled before rubbing sleep from his eye.

“Well, I appreciate it. And if you take me to a better realm, then I will truly never forget your kindness,” Estelle remarked, trying to keep a friendly tone even though her mind was being plagued by the reason why she needed to leave her home. She pulled one of the fish from the fire, checked it was cooked well enough, then passed it to Killian. After taking her own, she slowly ate the creamy flesh and allowed her thoughts to rest on her heartbreak.

“I was in love once too, you know,” Killian said out of the blue, managing to catch Estelle’s attention. She glanced over at him with raised eyebrows, silently questioning his statement. “I’ve seen that look before, in a mirror. Well, that and you said last night that your heart is preoccupied.”

“Aren’t you perceptive?” Estelle said with a hint of smile to prove that she was intending it lightheartedly, even though her tone still conveyed her depressed thoughts.

“Very, actually,” he remarked with a grin that slowly faded. “I know what it’s like to lose someone. In an awful way, too.” Estelle tilted her head, trying to understand why Killian was opening up to her.

“May I ask how?” she questioned, not expecting a reply.

“A crocodile ripped her heart from her chest and crushed it before my eyes.”

“I’m so sorry… That’s dreadful,” Estelle breathed, shocked and unable to imagine enduring such an event. “Have you moved on from her?”

“No.” The word was like a dagger to Estelle’s guts, telling her that she was going to be stuck with her sorrow for a while.

“How long has it been…?” she asked in a scarce voice, uncertain if she was crossing a line but interested in having an answer.

“Many years,” Killian sighed as he tossed away a fish bone. “I don’t know what it’s going to take to distract me from her memory, or if it will ever happen.” Estelle paused, noticing how down he appeared and she felt an urge to attempt to cheer the kind man up.

“That doesn’t make me feel any better,” she remarked with a hint of humour. Killian gave a short chuckle, snapping out of his distressing thoughts.

“My apologies. I just wanted you to know that you’re not alone, and it does get somewhat easier,” he explained and she nodded, the corners of her lips curling upwards.

“Thank you.”

“Any time,” he offered and Estelle turned her attention back to her food. She mulled over what Killian had told her, finding comfort in the reassurance that it would become easier for her to deal with in time. Estelle found hope and found herself letting go of some pain and resentment she held towards Drake, accepting that what she had with him was not true love. Once she finished her meal, she stood and Killian looked up at her with a questioning gaze.

“I am going for a walk, to clear my mind,” she explained as she straightened her dress. “If I do some more thinking, surely I will feel better.” Estelle offered him a hopeful smile and was pleased to see it returned.

“Of course, love. Good luck,” Killian said before his face fell serious. “Don’t go too far from the camp.” Estelle hesitated at the sudden grave tone.

“Why not?” she asked with a creased brow but Killian decided to not answer, feeling as though his warning was surely sufficient.

“Take my word for it. Enjoy your walk,” he replied, ending their conversation as he left the campfire to find one of his crew.