If I Stay

"Okay, I don't know what you said to Harry, but he's in a shitty mood, and it's making everyone upset." I rolled my eyes. Why was it that every time I was minding my own business, Harry was brought into the conversation? Could I not have at least an hour of peace?

"I told him I didn't like him. He needs to get over it, and so do you. Whatever little fascination you have with Harry, you need to let it go. I swear, you're the one that likes him, not me." I didn't mean to snap at her, but the words came out so fast there was no hope for taking them back, not that I really wanted to anyway. Nina did seem to have a weird fascination with Harry that was rather annoying. I didn't understand how she could constantly tell me to stay away from him, yet she was always talking about him.

"You seriously think I like that prick?" Her cheeks turned red, and I curled the last of my hair before sliding on my dress.

"Honestly, you could have fooled me. For someone that hates him so much, you sure do talk about him a lot." It was like my brain no longer had a filter. I said whatever I was thinking about, and I knew this was going to be the argument of the century, but I was tired of everyone telling me what I should or shouldn't do.

"I can't believe you." She stomped out of my room, slamming the door behind her. Under normal circumstances, I would have gone after her and apologized immediately, but I was still slightly angry from my row with Harry, though I wouldn't actually admit that to anyone. Him telling me that I wasn't worth his time stung, though I shouldn't have felt anything at all considering I said I had no interest in him whatsoever. I sighed, knowing I'd have to apologize to Nina eventually, but now wasn't a good time. I threw the last of my things in my purse and walked out to my car. I still had to meet Landon for dinner, and I was more concerned with that than anything else. My brother was getting married, and I'd yet to meet his fiancee. I drove the ten miles to the restaurant where I was meeting them, letting the valet park my car. I walked inside, spotting them immediately. They looked every bit of a newly engaged couple, bodies turned toward each other, wide grins on their faces. I stopped at the table and cleared my throat, a smile of my own appearing.

"Logan!" Landon jumped up, wrapping his arms around me briefly, "Thank you for coming. This is Lottie, my fiancee, and her brother, Louis." I hadn't noticed there was another person at the table, but as Lottie launched herself at me, I watched him get up.

"I've heard so much about you. Landon literally talks about you all the time. You're so beautiful." She beamed, and I liked her almost instantly. She had a genuine air about her, though she did seem a bit overbearing, probably because she wanted to make a good impression.

"It's nice to meet you," I turned to the other person occupying the table, sticking my hand out for him to shake.

"Sorry love. I don't shake hands." He grabbed the hand that I stuck out and pulled me forward, pressing a kiss to my cheek. I backed away nervously and cleared my throat, tucking my hair behind my ears.

"Pleased to meet you," I muttered as he pulled out my chair. I thanked him quietly, sitting down as gracefully as I could manage in the heels that I was wearing. Landon pushed a glass of water in my direction, and I nodded my thanks, taking a long sip.

"Landon tells me you're in Uni. What are you studying?" I wasn't expecting her to start asking questions so soon, but if I wanted to get to know her, the conversation was going to have to start somehow.

"I'm studying chemistry." Her eyes widened a little, and Landon choked on his drink.

"You can't be serious," he said before Lottie could even get a word out. I sincerely hoped that this conversation wouldn't turn into a parent bashing session. I didn't want to subject Lottie to that her first night meeting me.

"It was either chemistry or business," I shrugged, taking another sip of my water, praying he would let it go. I should have known that he wouldn't. Regardless of how long he'd been away, I knew Landon like the back of my hand. He wasn't going to keep quiet about this.

"What about photography?" Louis seemed amused as he sat there quietly, watching us banter back and forth.

"You know mum and dad would never pay for school if I went that route." I tried to lower my voice, but Landon was angry with me.

"Why not talk to me? I could have helped you." I'd never considered asking Landon to help me with school. He'd moved away, and he had things of his own to pay for. I would never just dump myself on him because I didn't want to follow our parents rules.

"I would never ask you to do that," I pointed out, giving Lottie an apologetic look. I knew this wasn't where she expected the conversation to go, and I felt bad about taking the spotlight away from her. This was supposed to be her night, and I was ruining it, much like I ruined everything else.

"Logan-" I cut him off before he could say anything else.

"Can we talk about this later? I'm supposed to be getting to know Lottie, not arguing with you about my schooling." He opened his mouth to protest, but I shot him the look of death, letting him know that the conversation was over. He sighed and rubbed his hands over his face. I averted my gaze back to Lottie and asked her about her career. She began speaking excitedly, and I knew I was in the clear for now. Every so often Louis would chime in, though he wasn't saying much. He seemed preoccupied with his phone. We'd never been allowed electronics at the dinner table, so I found it sort of rude, but I kept my thoughts to myself.

"I'd like you to be my maid of honor." I spluttered a little, wiping my lips with my napkin.

"I'm sorry?"

"I don't have many girlfriends, and we don't want the wedding to be big anyway. It seems only fair. Louis' going to be the best man, so you don't have to worry about walking down the aisle with one of your brother's creepy friends," she scrunched her nose in disgust, and I laughed.

"Oi, my friends aren't disgusting." I actually had to agree with Lottie. Landon's friends were pigs, much like he used to be, though it was clear that he turned over a new leaf.

"So what do you say?" She looked at me hopefully, and I didn't have the heart to turn her down.

"Okay," I muttered, wondering how I was going to get through a wedding. Big or not, some attention was going to be on me, and I wasn't looking forward to it. I knew the duties of being a maid of honor. I'd be running around like a chicken with its head cut off with Lottie, trying on dresses, cake tasting, going to see venues. I was in for it, and I could only hope that I would come out alive.

"Thank you," she squealed, throwing her arms around me again. My phone was vibrating insistently in my purse, but I refused to answer it. Lottie was rambling away about the different things she wanted, every so often popping a bite of food into her mouth. It wasn't until we said our goodbyes and went to our respective cars that I actually pulled my phone out. There were several missed calls from Nina and one from Niall. There had to be an emergency, but instead of calling back, I drove home, knowing that whatever was going on would still be there when I got home. I pulled into my parking space and got out, holding my keys and my shoes in my hand. I'd barely made it through the front door when I heard a sigh of relief.

"Oh, thank God you're here!" Clearly Nina wasn't upset with me anymore. And if she was, whatever was currently going on was more important.

"Everything alright?" I asked, hanging my keys on the hook and dropping my shoes by the door.

"Absolutely not. He's your problem now." She walked out the door without another word. I didn't understand what was going on, but I got my answer when I walked into the living room.

"Logan!" My mouth dropped open as a very drunk Harry stumbled away from the couch, eyes low and a wide grin on his face.

"Oh, you've got to be kidding me," I muttered, letting my purse fall onto the coffee table.

"No jokes here!" He giggled to himself and then hiccuped. I rolled my eyes, walking into the kitchen to grab him a bottle of water and some aspirin.

"What are you doing here, Harry?" I asked, forcing him to take the medicine and drink some water. It was almost like taking care of a child, and I could only hope that he'd be able to go home soon.

"I came to see you, but you weren't here." He flopped onto the couch, resting his head on the back of it.

"What happened to me not being worth your time?" It was only hours ago that he'd insulted me, yet here he was, claiming that he came to see me. I didn't know what was wrong with him, and I really didn't want to find out. Harry was giving me headaches, and I barely spent any time around him.

"That was a lie, obviously. I actually really like you, but you don't like me, and you hurt my feelings. Why don't you like me? Is it because I'm ugly?" He turned to face me, drunken confusion in his eyes. How was I supposed to explain anything to him when he probably wouldn't remember it?

"You're not ugly, Harry." He was far from it, but I had a feeling this conversation was going to get very awkward very quickly.

"Then what is it?"

"Your attitude is horrendous." I said honestly, twisting my hair into a bun.

"That's because you don't pay attention to me," he pouted like a five year old that was told they couldn't have a cookie before dinner. I knew we weren't going to get anywhere tonight. I just needed to figure out a way to get him home.

"Drink your water," I mumbled, standing to change out of my dress. When I walked back into the living room in sweats and a t-shirt, glasses perched on my nose, Harry had finished his water bottle and was sitting on the couch with his legs crossed and eyes closed. I made a pot of tea for myself, switching on the TV.

"Can I ask you something?"

"I'm sure you're going to ask whether I say yes or no." He gave me a drunken smile and then coughed.

"Are you a virgin?" My eyes widened, and I stared at him in disbelief. Drunk or not, who asks a question like that out of nowhere? I didn't want to answer him, though not answering was an answer within itself to most people. I sat for a moment, debating on telling the truth or telling him it was none of his business.

"Why do you ask?" Answering a question with a question always seemed to keep me out of trouble. I hoped the circumstances applied for this situation.

"Because most girls are dying to sleep with me, but you won't even let me take you out for breakfast." I sighed and rubbed the tension from between my eyebrows. I wanted to punch him, but that wasn't fair, and I didn't feel like explaining to anyone why he woke up with a black eye.

"Your attitude."

"I know, I'm sorry. I just don't understand. I guess I'm not used to girls telling me no." It finally came from his mouth, but it was annoying all the same. Who did he think he was?

"So you think I'm a virgin because I'm not jumping into bed with you?" I raised an eyebrow at him, crossing my arms over my chest.

"Not just me. I mean, you've been to the house twice, but I've never seen you go into a room with anyone. Almost every girl that's ever been in that house has slept with at least one of us, if not more." I was positive that he wouldn't be sharing this information with me if he was sober, and to be completely honest, I didn't want to hear anymore. What they did was their business, and it didn't need to be shared.

"What if I only have sex when I'm in a relationship?" The conversation was going to take a turn for the worst. I could feel it.

"I don't do relationships," he said simply, shrugging his shoulders. I sighed because he still wasn't getting my point.

"Harry, I never said I wanted to be in a relationship with you. Frankly, I think that would be a horrible idea. You don't seem to know how to keep your dick in your pants." He laughed, letting me know that my thoughts were correct.

"Well, all jokes aside, I do want to fuck you." The fact that he was blunt about it shocked me more than his words did. I wasn't sure how to respond. I sat there, gaping at him like a fish out of water. What does someone say to something like that?

"Okay." It was the only thing I could say. For once, I didn't have a smart remark. It was almost like the sarcastic part of my brain shut down.

"So you want to?" I quickly shook my head and help my hands up.

"Absolutely not. I was just acknowledging what you said." His face fell a little and then perked up once again. He had something up his sleeve, and I didn't want to know what it is.

"What if I take you on a date?" He was an absolute idiot. He had absolutely no interest in dating, yet he was willing to take me on a date to get into my pants. I rolled my eyes and shook my head, mumbling to myself about how stupid men were.

"Harry, I'm not going to sleep with you."

"We'll see about that." He smirked, seeming confident with himself.

"You're not even going to remember this conversation," I pointed out, hoping that the words were true. I didn't want to remember this conversation, nor did I want to have it again.

"I'm not that drunk."

"Then go home," I motioned toward the door, hoping that he would actually leave, but he stayed put.

"I can't. They're having another party, and I don't want to be there." I considered telling him to go home again, but I figured at some point he'd end up here again anyway. I stood, grabbing a pillow and a blanket from the hall close.

"You're sleeping on the couch." I threw the items at him before walking to my room and shutting the door behind me. I could hear him singing along to the Friends theme song, and I knew it was going to be a long night.