Illuminate

Simone

Simone anxiously tapped her booted foot against one of the legs of her desk, waiting for the first class on her first day to start. She did have pretty much the ideal schedule, all back to back classes from 10 a.m. until 5 p.m., with just enough time for lunch, that way she didn’t have to stay on campus forever but she didn’t die from starvation either.

The classrooms on this campus were so much nicer than she was used to. They were clean- really clean- and the most spacious she’d ever seen.

“This is the right classroom for Psych 134, yeah? With Professor Golden?”

Simone turned around to see a guy staring at her, eyes wide and looking at her expectantly. She nodded at him.

“Cool, thanks.”

She nodded at the man once again before turning around. Just as she was about to return to her self-destructive thought process, he pulled her out of it.

“My name’s James, by the way.”

She turned around to really look at the stranger this time. He had dark disheveled hair and a lip ring, tattoos peaking out from the end of his sweater sleeve.

“I’m Simone,” she replied. “Nice to meet you.”

They ended up talking for the remainder of the time until class started. It turned out that James was from California as well, where his boyfriend of six years still lived. Though he was planning on moving to New York with James later on in the semester, it was evident that James missed him incredibly already.

The two were sure to exchange numbers before they moved to their next classes, the next being the class with Kelly. When they saw one another they linked arms before striding into class together.

“So what the fuck happened yesterday?” Simone asked, not bothering to start off easy. She hasn’t seen Kelly since she stormed out the day before and she couldn’t help but be nosey as all hell about it.

“Your brother’s a dick,” Kelly spat, throwing her legs on top of the desk and leaning back into her chair.

“No, he has a dick, which I totally heard you get the other night,” Simone retorted, making Kelly’s breath stop and her body to go still momentarily.

“You know what alcohol does to me,” Kelly waved off the subject, swinging her legs back onto the ground to put her notebook from her backpack onto the desktop.

Deciding that the incident was too fresh for Kelly’s stubbornness to let down enough to get some details, Simone let it go. For now, anyway. She was sure to make a mental note to come back to it another time when it was right.

The two decided that this was easily going to be their favorite class of the semester. Not only was the content of the class interesting, but their professor also was sassy, clear, and thorough, which was something rare at their former community college. They appreciated being able to see each other for a little bit every day, considering that Kelly’s schedule was a bit more scattered throughout the day than Simone’s.

As the universe would have it, her last class of the day was with Harry. Her lunch break and second to last class seemed to drag on for ages as her stupid heart was beating sporadically at the thought of seeing him again. She loathed how big of an effect the Brit had on her but it’s not like she could help it, and the only consolation she could offer herself is that any other American girl would surely fall to the same fate upon meeting him.

Simone distracted herself by doodling on the first page of her notebook when someone chose the seat next to her in the empty computer room. When she turned her head, Harry was staring at her with a wide smile, his darling dimples making their usual appearance.

“Didn’t hear from you at all yesterday; you alright?” He asked, setting down his backpack underneath the table.

Simone nodded and ran a hand through her hair.

“Yeah, sorry about that. I decided to just sleep the day away. It’s been a long weekend and I figured I should try to get a head start on sleep since school started today, you know what I mean?”

“I know what you mean,” he responded. “What are you doing tonight?”

“I was probably just going to go back home and read over my syllabuses tonight, make sure I’m familiar with everything so I don’t ever get behind. Maybe watch a movie. You?”

“I was going to do the same, actually. Maybe I can walk you home and we can help each other?”

Simone bit her lip and weighed her options. While it sounded nice, she didn’t really want to be home at all, especially with someone new to potentially be exposed to the drama that had already been raised in such a short amount of time.

“Actually, do you think I could head over to yours?” she asked, raising her voice a bit since others were shuffling into the room now.

Harry nodded and gave her another small smile. “Sure, we can head over after this. This is your last class too, yeah?”

“Yep,” she replied. “Thank God. I normally love rainy weather but it’s making me so sleepy today.”

“But you slept all day yesterday,” he snorted, shaking his head playfully at the blond. Simone opened her mouth to respond but the professor walked into the class at that moment.

Class was over before they knew it, and Harry and Simone walked out of the class together. The pair argued over getting Chinese take out or pizza, but after Harry agreed to pay if they went for his preference of take out, Simone gave in and agreed.

“You’re so weird, Simone,” he commented.

They were on the couch, sitting cross-legged next to one another with their knees against each other. They watched The Office, something Harry had never seen but Simone insisted on making him be exposed to.

“This show is stupid,” he said, laughing with his mouth full of chow-mien.

“Firstly, don’t talk with your mouth open,” she replied, a mouth full of food her own damn self, “and secondly, this show is stupid but in the most creative and beautiful way possible so don’t even try to tell me you don’t like it because it’s impossible not to.”

Harry shook his head and fought a smile on his face, and Simone had to convince herself she didn’t see a glimmer of admiration for her in his eyes.

Kelly

As much as Kelly didn’t want to come home that night, she sort of had to. It was either that or she had to go back to stay with her parents an hour and a half outside of the city, which was both painfully inconvenient and painful to think about in general. Not that her parents were terrible people, she just didn’t enjoy the idea of arguing with them for the millionth time on their differing views of various subjects.

When she entered the apartment, she saw Parker on the couch, deadpanning in the direction of the television, not even bothering to look in her direction. She sighed, feeling her stubbornness melting away, making her feel vulnerable, which only caused a strange mix of anger and sadness on top of everything else.

“Listen, Parker, about yesterday-”

“I would really fuckin’ love to pretend like yesterday didn’t happen, Kelly,” he told her honestly.

All traces of emotion in his voice and overall demeanor were gone. He was silently willing her to just go on as if nothing happened, that way he couldn’t either be caused or cause himself to have any more pain.

Kelly hesitantly walked over to the couch and stood a few feet away from him.

“I don’t think this is something to ignore,” she sighed. “Trust me, I’d love to, but I don’t think we should. We’ve been friends for years and I don’t think a drunken mistake-”

“That’s just it, Kelly!” he roared, standing up to look down at the already tall girl, suddenly making the height difference even more apparent. “That’s exactly it. I don’t see it as a drunken mistake. I’ve wanted that for years, baby, years, and I saw a little glimmer of hope that you finally felt the same, but I was wrong.”

“How was I supposed to know?” Kelly asked, blood rising to her cheeks. She had to keep her composure and ignore how he so casually called her such an affectionate pet name. “I’m not a psychic, I don’t know what you’re thinking or feeling unless you actually fucking say something.”

“Everyone could see it except you, Kel. Everyone. Simone, my parents, hell, even your friends, but the one person who really should’ve seen it? Didn’t even try to look for a sign. I never meant that much to you. Never even looked a single glance in my direction in the hopes that I ever even gave a fuck about you.”

Kelly stood there, frozen, her heart pounding in her chest so damn loud she was convinced he could hear it from where he stood. The two were silent for a hot minute.

“I’ve been so hopelessly caught up in you, I can’t even be in a relationship with someone else without being guilty of imagining myself with you instead. That’s why after I ended things with Natalie I just stopped dating all together. It was all just pointless and really fucking heartless of me to do to those girls. I was just standing there, letting them fall for me and letting them think the feelings were returned, when in reality I’ve just been in love with the girl who-”

“In love?” Kelly repeated, her voice cracking as she raised her eyebrows in disbelief.

“Yes, Kelly, in love. Haven’t I made it clear how much you mean to me? How I get so down every time you chat about a new guy you met or the way I hold you when you’re crying about being hurt by someone who doesn’t treat you the way I would if you just gave me a chance?”

By now tears were spilling over in Parker’s eyes, pained but also strangely relieved by being able to freely speak the words that were on the tip of his tongue for ages.

“Parker, I don’t know what to say,” Kelly said, dumbfounded for probably the first time in her life, her eyes shifting onto the carpet.

Parker stepped forward the last couple feet, standing right in front of her and placing his finger under her chin to have her look at him.

“Tell me what you want, and stick to it. I can’t be a fuck buddy. I can’t just go on pretending that it didn’t happen, but I’m not going to repeatedly torture myself when in the end that’s not what I really want.”

His eyes desperately searched hers to see an answer in them, and when Kelly began to silently cry, he wiped away the tears that fell.

Kelly closed her eyes and without thinking, pressed her lips to his. It was soft and sweet, but an underlying sense of urgency could still be felt.

“You, Parker. I want you.”