Status: Currently working on :)
Dark Days
Descend into Darkness.
*Dahvie’s P.O.V.*
“Night Dahvie.” Jayy smiled, heading for his room.
“Night Jayy.” I replied, heading into mine and shutting the door.
I wish I didn’t spend my nights alone, it allows my thoughts to run rampant. Though I always seem so happy and chilled, it’s an act. An act that I’ve perfected throughout the years, but an act nonetheless.
I peeled off my shirt and stripped my jeans then stood in the middle of my room in my boxers, looking into my mirror. Cuts and scars crisscrossed my thighs, leaving nearly no skin on show, and I bowed my head, falling back into my depression. After a full day of playing my facade in front of Jayy, I was worn out, and could no longer hold back the black of my mind.
Rapist. A man who fucks underage girls. Paedophile.
I’m not! I internally screamed, crumbling to the floor, holding my head in my hands.
No one even likes you anymore. They all think you’re disgusting.
But I didn’t do anything wrong!
And you’re gay. A fag. A fairy.
So what?! I don’t care if I’m gay!
You can’t even tell him your feelings.
Tears began to well up under my closed eyelids, and I shook as I silently sobbed.
It’s like there’s a second voice in my head that does nothing but criticise me, and it drives me crazy.
You’re a fucking failure, David.
As the desperation overwhelmed me, I dragged myself to my feet and stumbled to my ensuite, pulling open the top drawer and grabbing a sealed razor blade.
No one’s ever thought anything about me always having a supply of them in my bathroom, because I have a razor that uses blades to layer hair. Thank God for being a hairdresser.
I unwrapped the blade and pressed it into my thigh, the cold metal biting into my skin. Cuts and scars peeled open as I dragged it across.
As I cut, the voice faded into darkness, and my mind slowly became my own again.
Why does cutting always clear my head? I pondered.
I carefully cleaned the blade and wrapped it up again, putting it back in the drawer, then grabbed tissues and used them to mop up the blood cascading down my leg.
Dahvie Vanity survives another night stuck inside his wretched head.
“Night Dahvie.” Jayy smiled, heading for his room.
“Night Jayy.” I replied, heading into mine and shutting the door.
I wish I didn’t spend my nights alone, it allows my thoughts to run rampant. Though I always seem so happy and chilled, it’s an act. An act that I’ve perfected throughout the years, but an act nonetheless.
I peeled off my shirt and stripped my jeans then stood in the middle of my room in my boxers, looking into my mirror. Cuts and scars crisscrossed my thighs, leaving nearly no skin on show, and I bowed my head, falling back into my depression. After a full day of playing my facade in front of Jayy, I was worn out, and could no longer hold back the black of my mind.
Rapist. A man who fucks underage girls. Paedophile.
I’m not! I internally screamed, crumbling to the floor, holding my head in my hands.
No one even likes you anymore. They all think you’re disgusting.
But I didn’t do anything wrong!
And you’re gay. A fag. A fairy.
So what?! I don’t care if I’m gay!
You can’t even tell him your feelings.
Tears began to well up under my closed eyelids, and I shook as I silently sobbed.
It’s like there’s a second voice in my head that does nothing but criticise me, and it drives me crazy.
You’re a fucking failure, David.
As the desperation overwhelmed me, I dragged myself to my feet and stumbled to my ensuite, pulling open the top drawer and grabbing a sealed razor blade.
No one’s ever thought anything about me always having a supply of them in my bathroom, because I have a razor that uses blades to layer hair. Thank God for being a hairdresser.
I unwrapped the blade and pressed it into my thigh, the cold metal biting into my skin. Cuts and scars peeled open as I dragged it across.
As I cut, the voice faded into darkness, and my mind slowly became my own again.
Why does cutting always clear my head? I pondered.
I carefully cleaned the blade and wrapped it up again, putting it back in the drawer, then grabbed tissues and used them to mop up the blood cascading down my leg.
Dahvie Vanity survives another night stuck inside his wretched head.
♠ ♠ ♠
May be a little graphic, also it's the first story I've started writing in about 4 years... Please be kind <3