Within the Castle

When we were positive that there was not a chance of us getting out, until someone could come and comprehend that the lift had broken, Luke suggested we sit down to save our legs. It was compacted, but not to an uncomfortable extent. When I put my back against the wall and laid out my legs, they only went to half way across the floor. As Luke perched into his spot across from me, his legs almost touched the wall on the other side. We faced one another, but I was avoiding eye contact.

Out of nowhere, Luke spat a chuckle. I didn’t need to ask why, because it was clear he was just revelling in the weirdness of the moment. There we were, lounged on the floor of an elevator. Surely this was only a circumstance that happens in films. He stopped laughing not long later and even though I wasn’t looking at him, I sensed he was staring at me.

Unsurprisingly, he was the first to talk, “are your bruises feeling any better?”

“Yeah,” I uttered, “thanks.”

That was no lie. Throughout the day, I had begun to notice their ache less and less. Whether that was because they were healing well, or I was gradually becoming conditioned to the pain, I didn’t know.

“That’s good. It actually does look like the spots on your collarbone have faded their colour.”

Unaware that my t-shirt had slipped down slightly so that my neck was on view, I reacted to his words by hastily pulling the cotton back up closer to my chin.

“You don’t really need to hide it,” he commented, “I know it’s there now.”

I retorted, “well what do you want me to do? Get naked so you can see it all?”

Why was I so angry?

No retaliation from Luke.

“I’m sorry,” I swallowed.

All his features had softened “don’t be.”

There wasn’t any noise inside of the lift except for an almost inaudible buzz from the light bulb above us and the ‘haaa’ of carbon dioxide being pushed from our mouths. In my head, I was thinking over and over about my beatings. My weeks of absolute sorrow. The parties that I would be taken to every Saturday night. Every month that I’d been living in torture.

Flashbacks swam through my brain about all the times I had woken up and gone to the bathroom and glared at myself, wondering if it truly was me, and then silently cried. Silently, because I didn’t want him to hear. Memories came about from some of the most endless nights when he would see it as so arousing to put a blindfold over my eyes and duck tape my wrists behind my back. Seeing damp tear spots seep through the material around my eyes was a happy bonus for him. Tears for normal humans are a sign of sadness, but tears for a monster just yell ‘congratulations; you have the power.’

“Was your lecture interesting today?”

“He’s not even my boyfriend.”

“Aurora, what?... You don’t have to-“

“He never asked me. Ever. I was never asked. I don’t even know when it started. Luke, I don’t even know. I was so alone and he was just there and I felt like, like, nobody had even spoken to me since mum and dad went and then he took a liking to me and I had to go with it because someone is better than no one? Right? Right, Luke, right?”

Poor Luke was flabbergasted. My body was shaking and my vision became thoroughly blurred.

“So he just came home one night, one night. And I-I just wanted to make him my friend and then, and then he wanted to do more with me and I was so sad, Luke, do you know how sad I was? I was so sad. So I went along with it and I’d never had sex before so I didn’t know what to do and it was so bad but I just thought that maybe it’s supposed to be like that, and- and-“

Now I was sobbing intensely and my whole face trembled. Each word was a scream, and I didn’t even know if Luke could understand me. As I tried to suck in air to stop hyperventilating, he brought his knees to his chest and pulled himself forward onto all fours. Quickly, he crawled over to me, sliding my bag out of the way, and then turning around so his back was against the wall. Gently and slowly, he put his arm around the tops of my shoulders, slightly nudging my head into his warmth so I was eventually swaddled completely.

“Princess,” he cooed, “shhh, it’s okay.”

I wasn’t able to stop myself.

“L-Luke, at one stage he used to at- at least speak to me, a-and now it’s getting worse and now he only needs me when he’s mad or, or if he wants to ha-ave sex. I had forgotten what it felt like to just- just talk to someone before you came here.”

“Okay, okay. It’s alright, darling,” his hand came up and feebly stroked my hair, flattening it to my skull. Resting his chin on my scalp, he mumbled his words calmingly into me, “I’m here now.”

“I didn’t want to be saved be-before because, I-I thought I was doing okay. But-but now I’ve met y-ou and I c-can see.”

He shushed, “I know, Aurora, I know now. I’m not going anywhere. I’m going to help you help yourself.”

I wish he didn’t keep saying that because I didn’t know what he meant. My desire was to just have him save me, himself. But I was a blubbering mess and too spluttery to question it or screech anymore. My head pounded a little of a headache, but being so close to his warm body was kind of soothing it. Snuggling up to him made me feel so cared for, loved even.

The blubbering seethed down to tiny whimpers and then down more to simply breathing. Luke didn’t stop caressing my hair even after the cries had ended. We slumped there, unmoving, for quite a long time. My hand had come up to rest, like a paw, on his chest, and he’d used his other hand to hold onto it. Stains from my beige makeup were smudged over Luke’s white shirt, and the water from my eyes had made it sink in and stick to the material more.

Although I could not see for certain, I thought that surely the white of my eyeballs had turned red because they were scratchy whenever I blinked. The damn elevator hadn’t shown any signs of shifting yet, but I didn’t want it to because, even though I was a trashy emotional mess, I was quite happy being that trashy emotional mess if it were in a pair of Luke’s warm cuddling arms.

Some time passed before he hindered his repetitive hair stroke motion and actually combed his fingers through my hair, causing my head to tilt back so I was gazing up at his face. I think he was about to say something but then he stopped and just openly gazed at my face. I took the time to examine him.

Up close, Luke’s face was still quite smooth looking. His skin tone was slightly darker than mine; I was constantly pasty. Teeny blonde hairs were sprouting all over cheeks and got denser along the frame of his jaw and above his top lip. They were very light and transparent. I couldn’t imagine he would ever be able to grow a noticeable beard. Near his ear on the left side, I could see a lump in his skin that was straining his perfection. It was only skin colour now, however, I knew it would get angry red soon. The cookie dough must have been taking its toll on his otherwise acne-free complexion.

His eyes were ocean blue – the colour that you only see surrounding pretty islands. When being overtly judgmental, it was possible to see two brown hairs in Luke’s right eyebrow that were trying to blend into the blonde mix. Neither of his brows were curved fabulously around his eye shape, and the short hairs in them dodged in all directions. His nose was rather pointy and sharp along the ridge, but his nostrils were contrastingly soft and fluttered in and out with his breathing.

Luke’s lips were light pink and looked cushiony. The lower lip was a tad darker in colour and was bigger in size. They weren’t clasped together, so I could see a bit of his teeth behind and I watched as he, incredibly slowly, pulled back his bottom lip so his top two pearly teeth could skim over it. When the lip was pushed back out after being bitten, it was less dry than previously and, to my eye, glistened deliciously.

I couldn’t not.

I had to.

My hand snapped from his chest to hold onto his cheek and I forced my lips up to slam onto his.

It felt… so good. So free.

Luke made a mumbled sound when we connected and then smuggled his top lip up so that it could lift up and catch my top lip underneath it. The kiss got wet when we started sucking on each other and I could feel his hot skin sizzling against my chilled features. Even my hand on his face got clammy and everything surrounding our heads seemed steamy and humid. There was a shooting feeling zipping like a pinball around my stomach and it made me so volatile that I thought maybe I’d blow up because I was so happy and he was so… delectable.

The hand he had tangled in my locks remained and the pads of his fingers started massaging the side of my skull, just atop my ear. His other hand, though, which had been deserted, attached itself to my hip and then trickled its way over to my spine. Gently, he traced circles with his thumb into my back. To match the rhythm of his rubbing, our kiss slowed and became lazier. That made me scared though.

I didn’t want it to slow to nothing. I didn’t want him to take his lips off mine. They made me get all tingly and it was so fun to be kissing him. My heart was working for once. I was swimming in a shed of fairy floss. He tasted amazing, sweet. I got so scared that it would end. I wanted it to fire up again. Adrenalin was sprinting around my veins and screaming do more, do more. So I did.

My thigh hitched up and swung over the top of Luke’s legs and my hair rocked along with me, bouncing away from my face and shoulders and riding down my back. I titled my head to more of an angle so I could try and gain more lip contact with him. Now, with a more open position on top of his body, my hands began to curiously wonder. One of them ran up and danced through his hair and the other launched down his neck and traced his chest.

His hands were not adventurous like mine. They fell down and wrapped around my hips softly; he was hugging me. Again, the kiss got leisurelier. It was passionate. But I was definitely the one keeping it persisting and Luke was just remaining until I pulled out. My fingers ceased their tracks because my brain told them to stop being so thirsty when the source of water was dry. Eventually there were only cute pecks keeping Luke and I together.

Both of us kept our eyes closed, and our noses were still touching when he uttered a few words, “so gorgeous, Princess.”

I ignored his comment and whined at him because I was bounding with energy now and the vigour was controlling my actions, “am I a bad kisser?”

He scrunched up his nose and pushed his lips onto mine again. They were blistering red now.

“No,” he grumbled, “you’re amazing. Don’t think that.”

“You didn’t get into it,” I stammered before we pecked again.

“Because you’re fragile right now, honey,” Luke explained, “I don’t want to grab you too hard somewhere and hurt you more than you already are.”

I literally groaned at him. “I’m fine. I want you to touch me… Please.”

“When you’ve recovered,” he smiled and nudged his nose against mine, “then, maybe. But not now.”

I huffed and dropped my head onto his shoulder, still sitting on top of him.

“You taste good,” I mumbled like a child, “and you smell good. And you look good. And you’re so cosy.”

His chuckles bounced my body on top of him a bit. “Same to you, Princess.” For a second his head stooped and planted itself in the ditch between my neck and shoulder. I could feel his lips brush over the exposed skin.

Once I felt his head was moving away from that place, I went in for my attack; flicking my head back up and crashing my face onto his. Luke was giggling into my mouth so there were vibrations of air leaping over my tongue. But I was in no joking mood – the taste of him was addictive.

“Mmph,” he mumbled, trying to say something to me. My mouth was blocking any intelligible words coming out. Realising that he wasn’t be going to get a single phrase out, as I was hungrily curving my tongue and lips around his, he stopped talking and just melted into the kiss with me.

I slid my body up a little further on his thighs, bringing my chest incredibly close to his. It was possible to feel the heat radiating between us then. If I could have, I would have taken my cardigan off to avoid sweating but I knew that my skin was marked and frankly very gross at the time, so Luke would have seem me and ran a thousand miles in another direction. Well, maybe only a metre considering we were stuck in a lift.

After a while, I was getting so heated that I actually needed to take a break or I would die. Sighing, I moved my head back. My eyes stayed closed though. I don’t know why – I kind of expected to be pulled back in. My neck prepared itself, waiting, anticipating that a hand would curve around it and aggressively snag it backward or forward or into some workable position.

When I did flutter my eyelids up, Luke’s pearls were looking peacefully into mine. He had his hands around my lower back still and there was a blushed tint in his cheeks.

“You are making it kind of hard for me, you know,” he choked out, a smirk present.

Quietly, catching my breath I asked, “what do you mean?”

“Restraining myself from going nuts with you,” he laughed, “when you’re kissing me like that. It’s hard to keep self control.”

I whined, leaning into him again, “Then don’t restrain yourself,”

He shook his head, “I have to, Princess. I won’t hurt you.”

I pushed onto him for yet another time. The flavour of his mouth was just so irresistible. It could keep me going for years.

He allowed his thumb to keep drawing circles into my hips and spine. Luke seemed really dazed and almost like he was getting high. I was similar, but was clearly more obsessed. Maybe that was because I was thinking to the future and I knew we wouldn’t be in the lift forever and it could potentially only be one minute until it would move and I would need to get off his lap. He never came off as the person who would be frightened about what was going to happen. Luke was living in the moment.

When I went for air again, he took the chance to talk, “we gotta talk about what’s going to happe-“

Nope. My lips were back on his.

“Aurora,” he breathed into me, using a stern voice like it was a warning.

I didn’t listen. We didn’t have long and this was amazing and Luke was so so stunning and

“Aurora-”

really sexy underneath me and I just wanted to feel his bones and all

“-baby”

his features until I knew every nook and section and part of him and it was so

“Baby.”

rebellious of me because I have never been in control before and he’s not even hitting me or grabbing me to stop

“mmugh”

and I am ruling him instead of him ruling me and everything is so good.

I gasped and sucked in some oxygen and there was a huge grin on my face.

“You. are. so. damn. excited,” he stated, “wow.”

Between breaths, a giggle escaped me. I was about to lean in until he spoke, “waitwaitwaitwaitwait. In a second. Let’s talk first.”

With a lack of respect, I rolled my eyes and grumbled, “fine.”

Luke just chortled at my irrational and groundless behaviour, “I haven’t seen you like this before.”

I’ll admit, I probably had never been like that before. It was unfamiliar to me as well. There was just no preventing it. Nobody had kissed me, or let me kiss them, for so long. For me, it was like an act of disobedience and I think I loved it. I was going crazy but I felt so safe at the same time.

“I like it,” he continued, “but you need to calm down so I don’t get as excited as you.”

My arms had snuck around his neck and my face was inching towards his, my eyes fixated on the movements of his jaw while he spoke. Playing me at my own game, he lifted his chin upward, pouting his lips to a tight circle and dotting them on my nose. I frowned playfully.
Or not so playfully seeing as I’d rather him be kissing my lips than my nose.

“I’m still going to be alive when we’re out of here,” he said in a matter-of-fact way, “you’re acting like you’ll never see me again.”

“Yeah but he can’t see me in here so I can’t get told off.”

Luke swallowed and very slowly questioned, “who is he? What’s his name?”

All of a sudden, I wasn’t so happy anymore. Craving back my energy from before, I clapped the palms of my hands onto the sides of his face and heaved him to me. He didn’t resist.

And he didn’t bring it up again – conscious that I wasn’t up to talk about it now. I had had my splurge, I’d already been sad. It was time to be delighted and enjoy the pretty man in front of me. Even if he was limiting himself because he thought I’d smash into pieces with just a little touch.

The reality was that I probably would. Not even an hour before our hooking up, I had been a sulking tragedy. I was pretty unstable.

Luke’s watch informed us that it was getting quite late. There hadn’t been any signs that we were getting rescued. I had my fingers crossed that we wouldn’t.

“Sleep if you’re tired, sweetheart,” he offered after I had yawned about ten times in a period of five minutes.

After getting exhausted and fidgety in the one spot, we had slumped down, putting his briefcase and my bag behind our skulls as pillows. His back was laid flat on the floor then and I was curled in a ball beside him, my head resting on his chest. For a blanket, Luke took off his suit jacket and draped it over our upper bodies while I shuffled to hug his side like a koala. Not asking for permission, or not waiting to be told, when I moved or acted, was so foreign to me.

Every once in a while I would look up and peck his lips. That was my choice to do that.

I had re-understood the concept of freedom. I could do what I wanted, when I wanted.

“But you’re not asleep yet,” I yawned whilst responding to him.

“And that matters because…?”

Valid point.

So, that means I didn’t fully understand freedom yet. I was learning. I didn’t have to wait until he was asleep to go to sleep myself. That was cool.

With that blissing thought, I drifted to slumber almost instantly. Dream or reality, somebody definitely whispered into my ear, “good night, Sleeping Beauty.”

The next thing I knew, I was waking up, hours later, in the same position. A serene sleep it had been, I assumed, because I couldn’t recall rising in shock of a nightmare or anything during the night. Luke was still on another planet with his arms draped around me. On top of us was his jacket still. I didn’t plan on moving. Every centimetre of my body was at total comfort and ease.

But I was very curious about the time. For all I knew, I could have been asleep for three minutes or three hours. Ever so cautiously, I felt around underneath our make-do blanket until I could get a hold of Luke’s bony, but wide, wrist. Needing to use both hands to lift the weight of it, I hauled it up to the light where I could read the time myself. Unfortunately, I disturbed Luke’s sleep and he lazily moaned at me, barely moving his lips.

“Mmm, what’s up?”

I whispered, “it’s 8am. You’ll need to be at work soon.”

“Oh,” he sighed, voice thick and deep, “I’m sure we’ll be out by then.”

Immediately, I was alarmed. Out? No. I’d pay all the money I owned to stay in there forever. With just Luke. Nobody else. I didn’t even need food or water or anything.

“Calm down,” he spoke, eyes still shut, “I told you before that we’ll be okay. You’ve got me.”

I nodded, facing up to him so my chin was digging holes into his chest. He smiled and laughed a little at the feeling and peeked open one eye to peer down at me. Like an animal on their prey, I jumped up and kissed him, sensing his hands automatically switch to suit when I had moved. I was near to hiking my leg up and straddling him when a sudden drop of the lift scared me.

A squeal blared from my mouth as our bodies flew downward, only for a tiny second, with the elevator’s motion. Luke was instantly no longer half-asleep. His eyes were large and he sat upright with me, keeping my chest touching his. There was a great screeching noise, which made us both grit our teeth while it rung. As soon as it ended, though, we seemed to be happily on our way. The direction the elevator was headed was down and it was travelling very smoothly without any jolting or clanging.

Our heads moved to look each other in the eyes. Luke was a mixture of shock and joy, and mine was just sadness and even some annoyance.

When the lift calmed its tracks and gently halted, Luke scrambled to his feet and gave me a hand in getting up. Picking up his jacket and suitcase, and kindly passing me the strap of my bag, he put on his largest grin and expectantly waited for, God knows what, on the other side of the doors. The classic ding was sounded, and, without any troubles, the doors slid open to reveal the short, pudgy owner of the building – grumpily chewing a gum and crossing his arms over his round belly, and an excited ethnical man - wearing a tradesman’s jumpsuit and holding a spanner.

“You’re saved,” the worker congratulated us, happily accepting a handshake from Luke.

But was I really? If anything, I’d been saved when I got trapped in that lift and now I was being captured back into hell.

Precipitously, I wasn’t as content as ten minutes ago. Luke was bubbling over with gratitude to the two men, chatting to them about the whole ordeal, and I was keeping my distance and feeling as the cool air breezed through the building’s entrance doors and poked goose bumps onto my skin.

The apartment owner and other man had to wrap up the conversation with Luke because, like him, they had other things to do and places to be and people to see. After they had gone, it seemed that Luke finally remembered I existed.

“What’s up?” he turned around to me cheerfully.

I was not jubilant back. My head dropped and I kicked around the air with my toes.

“Come on,” he sighed, “you’ve got uni, I’ve got work. And we’ll both be late if we don’t head off now.”

He started walking away, and I obviously followed. Outside, he stood and faced me. I wanted to get on my tiptoes and close my eyes and lean in and give him a ‘goodbye, have a nice day’ kind of kiss. But it didn’t feel right. Fright consumed me now. Nothing seemed scarier than making a move on him.

Seeing I was un-active, he took the lead and moved his own mouth, puckering his lips onto my forehead, “have a good day, Aurora.”

“You too,” I mumbled under my breath, twisting on my heels and then dragging myself the other way.

Dumb, dumb, dumb me with no reasonable reason to be angry, but angry anyway.

Throughout the day, I did the usual. Thought about Luke. Except there were more things that I could think about. Now I had been semi-intimate with him, I could rewind and dwell on how soft his lips were and how nice and plump they looked after I’d sucked on them. But, I could also think about his scheme, to help me from my life – the scheme I couldn’t comprehend.

Little progress was made on any of my university work. I found that I spent a lot of time tapping my pen on the desk instead of getting assignments done. Moreover, I didn’t really care.

Sometimes I really wanted to get home so I could be with Luke. Then I would realise that I wasn’t even going home to Luke. I was going home to the potential of the devil, and then maybe Luke, if he hadn’t gotten some sense and started hating me.

By the time I got back to the apartment at the end of the day, I was so uptight and anxious about everything that I chose not to wait for Luke. I was just so interested to know if the monster was upstairs because if he wasn’t, perhaps I could go over to Luke’s for dinner again. There was that small hope inside me. So, curiously, I went up the lift – having no issues now that it had been fixed.

My heart beat so rapidly and meanly against my ribs that I was sure it would soon break through and jump onto the floor and sprint away. Whether he was there or not practically determined my whole night; good or bad. When I reached my door, I could barely bring myself to open it. After ultimately pushing past the nerves, I was still in struggle, as the sweat that had pooled in my palms made it slippery to open the door.

Don’t be there. Don’t be home. Not tonight. I want to be with Luke tonight. Not you. Not you.

He wasn’t. I had held my breath for so long and my body was shaking so much that my bones were rattling like a skeleton. Thank God. Safety.

Well, unless he came over later, I guess. But he hadn’t done that in a while. And I had taken the risk of spending a night at Luke’s apartment before. I was willing to take it again. The giddiness was boiling bubbles in my stomach and nothing could stop me dumping my items and then running out my door again, wanting to see Luke straightaway when he came up the lift.

Pacing up and down the open hallway, I waited and waited for his arrival, knowing that as soon as the lift doors were open, he would come out and then, if I was lucky, he’d invite me over. The longer that I buzzed around, the more I doubted he would be caring enough to ask me. Hell, with the day’s hours to contemplate, he had probably come to terms with how pathetic I was and he would be down in the foyer of the building, right then and there, signing some papers to move out of the complex so that he would never have to see me ever –

Ding.

Luke.

I yelped in thrill. Throwing my body forward, I located myself directly front and centre of the elevator so I would perfectly be able to vision the angel that he was. And I was so glad once the doors opened. Every minute I had been without him had been torture. The day went too long and was too dreary and there wasn’t enough laughter and banter.

Beginning at his toes, my eyes scanned up his whole body. Shoes still clean. Trousers still flat and ironed, despite our previous night on the floor. Suit jacket on. Grey shirt tucked in. Tie over the top button and under the collar. Long neck.

But a frown.

Luke was frowning. Well, to his best ability.

Then, I took note. My magical man was not alone; he was accompanied. And when I shifted my eyes to the right I could see none other than my worst nightmare.

His hair was ragged. His old t-shirt had a hole in the seam. A dirt mark smudged over the knee of his jeans. The boots were falling apart underneath. More importantly, he was fuming steam. The colour of his face was red with absolute anger.

I saw that Luke was not overjoyed. But next to him was the extreme.

There was a rope of tension strung between the two, and I could tell they must have spoken. One of them would have said something controversial and the other would have spoken up to their morals. I was so embarrassed. I didn’t want innocent chirpy Luke to meet him like this. I didn’t want him to meet him at all.

“The fuck are you doing out here?” he spat at me.

Do I need to indicate which ‘he’ it was?

I shuddered in my shoes and I noticed Luke begin to breathe very heavily. My devil charged from the lift and grabbed my bicep, tugging me in the direction of our door. It was a good thing I didn’t close it beforehand or else there would have been awkward fumbling with keys to unlock it and all of hell would have broken loose.

Luke’s eyes remained stubbornly on him and I while he pulled me and then pushed me through our room. The last thing I saw before the door shut tightly was a tense expression on his face. Luke’s body hadn’t moved at all.

When we were alone, he took himself to the lounge and dove onto the couch, picking the remote control.

“Get me a beer.”

Unwaveringly, my legs took me to the kitchen, my hands opened the fridge and my fingers clasped a bottleneck. My feet carried me over to him, and my spine bent so that I could put the bottle onto the coffee table. While he snatched the beer and instantly swigged it down his throat, I spoke through fear and pried.

“What did you say him?”

“Who?” he retorted, clearly over the meeting of Luke now that he was content with his beer and sitcom.

“Luke. Our neighbour. The one in the lift with you a minute ago.”

“Pfft,” he spluttered, “that faggot.”

I almost cried, “what did you say to him?”

“The fuck?” he questioned my emotional state, glaring madly at me, “I told the fucking pussy where to stick it.”

By moving his eyesight back to the TV, he told me the conversation was over. I was upset and primarily worried. Luke was my first priority when I stormed into the bedroom and grabbed my notepad, writing him a note.

Are you okay?

Yes, Princess. The question is if you are okay? xx

His reply was efficient and I was relieved just from reading the first word.

I’m fine. What happened?

I met Vincent, that’s what happened
X

Glossing over the name, I choked and a scoffing sound splintered through my throat.

What did he say to you?

We introduced ourselves, and that was about it.
I want to ask you something, Aurora xx

I sighed, hating that he obviously played the severity of events down so that I wouldn’t be concerned. Further, I hated him switching the subject on me so easily.

Go ahead.. x

Have you ever tried simply saying ‘please stop, I don’t like it.’? xxx

Squinting at his writing, I got confused as to what he was really asking. It was kindergarten logic. Tell them to stop. Let them know you don’t like that. But, when I considered it, I had not ever done so. Not that I could recall. There had never been a time where I’d just politely asked.

I haven’t ever.

Maybe you should :) It’s not too late to try something new. xxo

I had to be honest with him.

I’m scared.

Baby, it’s worth a shot. Stand up for yourself. Take control. Be in charge. You’re stronger than you think xxx

I think I’m actually just weaker than you think…

No. Did you see yourself all over me last night in the lift? You can definitely take independent control of a situation. C’mon Aurora. Be the boss!
And you know, the police are always only a phone call away. Xx

I took a few minutes to compose myself. Luke was so correct. All the power in the world could be in my hands if I just became the leader and put myself in the position of authority. It was up to me. I repeated his pep talk in my mind when I stepped out the bedroom and planted the palms of my hands onto my hips.

The realisation dawned on me then that I firstly would need a reason to tell the lump on the sofa to stop. At the current time, he actually wasn’t doing anything wrong besides being a slob. So, I backtracked back into the bedroom and waited, fiddling with my top, my quilt, my own fingers. Until he trudged into the room like I expected. A grouchy smirk dazzled on his lips when he saw me sitting on the edge of the mattress.

“Already patiently waitin’ for me, eh?” he boasted, increasing his already sky rocketing ego.

“Actually,” I spluttered, ready to spill my opposing thoughts. My lips parted for the words to come out. But they just didn’t. His head had snapped to me, fury building in his eyes. Me speaking at all was a change out of the ordinary, and the tone of supremacy that I had assembled when saying it was something I don’t think he would have heard before. Instead of charging forward with my plans, the next thing I said was in a squeaky, quiet voice, “yes.”

“That’s what I thought,” he slowly nodded, tearing his t-shirt over his head and kicking of his shoes and pants.

Luke would be upset when I told him I couldn’t do it. But Luke also didn’t understand. He wasn’t aware of the repercussions I would have to face if I stood up for myself. He wasn’t aware of how difficult it was for me to say something so distant from what this monster wanted. Even I misinterpreted the toughness of the task before I went ahead and gave it ago.

Maybe Luke was too naïve about the entire situation. It was possible that he was yet to comprehend how short of a fuse my monster had. While the devil rammed my behind and I rammed my teeth down on the pillow to suppress any sorrowful whimpers, it crossed my mind that perhaps I’d have to explain more about everything to Luke. Then, he could make a wiser contribution on how I could ‘save myself.’

Before I could get to rest, and after the devil had fallen asleep, I scribbled out a poem that had been screwing around in my head. Not even knowing if Luke would still be awake, I slot it through the wall to him.

I want to talk you to in the morning about things. Here’s something stupid I just wrote.

You lay on hot coals? You burn and you die.
I know, I know, I’ve been told, it’s no lie -
But can’t you see such a death would be sweet,
I’d be comforted atop the warmth and heat.

A boiling cauldron? You’ll bubble and you’ll fry.
That’s true, That’s true, your words I can rely -
But don’t you realise that I wouldn’t want to fleet,
The blistering surrounds would make me feel complete.

In a campfire? You’ll cook like an oven pie.
Correct, correct, no need to explain why –
But will you believe that this decease would be a treat,
For I could be searing and enjoying the hot seat.

Are you mad? So desperate to pass with a fiery goodbye?
I might be, maybe, or I could have a problematic eye –
But as long as I don’t die under your chilling deceit,
Your ice-hard glare, taciturn ways, or cold-hearted feat.

Luke did reply.

I won’t let you die in any of those ways. Of course we can talk tomorrow. Goodnight now, Princess xox

I guess he missed he point of the poem.