White Christmas
Decorations.
"Can you hold the fucking ladder straight babe?" He yelled down from a rung in the middle of the imposing metal structure.
She had insisted that the decorations go up the day after Thanksgiving
"Well I'm sorry!" She shouted back. "I'm fucking trying to figure out if you're doing this shit right! You could have done this earlier, but no... you had to just jump headfirst into it! If you had let me looks this up first you wouldn't be wrapped in lights that weren't working on top of a fucking ladder!"
"I just want to get this done. It's freezing out here." He complained.
It was their first Christmas as a married couple.
"I don't see why you want me to hang the lights anyway. It's not like we're going to be here for Christmas."
"You still have to put up the tree." She reminded him.
"Damn it babe!"
She snickered, it was fun winding him up a bit over the decorations.
"Why?" He whined. "We're going to my parents house! It doesn't make sense to put up the tree!"
"Consider it your punishment for subjecting me to them for a week straight. And to you siblings. Especially your creepy ass little brother."
And they weren't even spending it at home.
"Come on, he is not that bad." He protested.
"Yes. He is. He fucking stares at my tits all the time and when we danced at the wedding, which you made me do remember, he was trying to look down my dress. He wasn't even subtle about it!"
"Okay so he stares at your tits, I stare at your tits."
To top that off, he was dragging her to his parents house.
"It's different! You and I are married, you're allowed to stare at my tits."
"Oh really?" He turned to look at her, sizing up his rather well endowed wife. She abruptly let go of the latter and crossed her arms, obscuring his view. "Hey!" he objected, as he wobbled a little.
"I think I'm going to leave you to finish the lights." She turned around and stomped through the yard back into the modest house.
He sighed heavily.
"Damn," he muttered under his breath. "She never fucking explained what I was supposed to do to get them to work."
She had insisted that the decorations go up the day after Thanksgiving
"Well I'm sorry!" She shouted back. "I'm fucking trying to figure out if you're doing this shit right! You could have done this earlier, but no... you had to just jump headfirst into it! If you had let me looks this up first you wouldn't be wrapped in lights that weren't working on top of a fucking ladder!"
"I just want to get this done. It's freezing out here." He complained.
It was their first Christmas as a married couple.
"I don't see why you want me to hang the lights anyway. It's not like we're going to be here for Christmas."
"You still have to put up the tree." She reminded him.
"Damn it babe!"
She snickered, it was fun winding him up a bit over the decorations.
"Why?" He whined. "We're going to my parents house! It doesn't make sense to put up the tree!"
"Consider it your punishment for subjecting me to them for a week straight. And to you siblings. Especially your creepy ass little brother."
And they weren't even spending it at home.
"Come on, he is not that bad." He protested.
"Yes. He is. He fucking stares at my tits all the time and when we danced at the wedding, which you made me do remember, he was trying to look down my dress. He wasn't even subtle about it!"
"Okay so he stares at your tits, I stare at your tits."
To top that off, he was dragging her to his parents house.
"It's different! You and I are married, you're allowed to stare at my tits."
"Oh really?" He turned to look at her, sizing up his rather well endowed wife. She abruptly let go of the latter and crossed her arms, obscuring his view. "Hey!" he objected, as he wobbled a little.
"I think I'm going to leave you to finish the lights." She turned around and stomped through the yard back into the modest house.
He sighed heavily.
"Damn," he muttered under his breath. "She never fucking explained what I was supposed to do to get them to work."