My Soul to Keep

It hadn't been the bright beam of sun smacking her in the face that woke her. Nor had it been the deep but steady snore that wasn't her own. Terra was awoken by the warmness of him, he had kept his promise. Matt had stayed. How many times did that make it? How many times had he put her before himself to keep her safe? Comfortable? Happy? There was something she'd never taken into consideration. Had he done this to make her happy?

She slowly lifted her head from his rising chest to look at his face. He was still fast asleep, lying almost too still. She hadn't meant to ogle at him so long, but she didn't want to pull her eyes away from him either. He was in need of a shave, but she liked the ruggedness of the stubble growing on his face. He'd slept on his back with his left arm wrapped loosely around Terra's body. He licked over his bottom lip before he turned his face away from her in his sleep.

She gently lowered her head back to his chest. His breathing was deep, calm and slow. It hadn't been her intention to fall back asleep. She meant to get up, to at least move away. However, something deep inside compelled her to remain near him. To not pull away. To never pull away.

She drifted in and out several times before she started to wake to something different. She could feel her hair, crazy from hard sleep, being brushed from her face. She could feel tingles tickling her spine deeply, but she didn't want the moment to end. Maybe she could keep up the act that she was sleeping still. Then it wouldn't have to end? Her eyes slowly opened when the gestured ceased. She froze once she felt the warm pressure on her cool forehead. It only lasted a brief moment, perhaps a two second count, but it felt like it wasn't going to end.

Their eyes locked once he leaned away, shock immediately crossing his face. Terra stared back at him, not able to process what had just happened.

“Terra...” His tone indicated he hadn't thought of his excuse. Maybe he'd hoped that he wouldn't need one. Could he have thought she wouldn't wake?

“Matt.” Terra sounded a bit more confident.

“I had a feeling that you would wake up, but-...” He looked over her face quickly before looking away from her and toward the closed bedroom door. “I thought maybe...”

“Maybe what?” Terra's voice was just above a whisper as she continued to stare up at Matt.

“I don't know. Maybe you wouldn't. Maybe I could just do it and leave with you never knowing. Maybe I shouldn't have done it in the first place.” He looked back into her eyes before closing his.

“Matt, it's okay.”

“This is the last thing you need. Someone like me making your life anymore complicated.” He moved to pull away, but Terra grabbed a handful of his shirt.

“What do you mean? How could you possibly know-?”

“Terra. Look at the shit I've gotten you into.” His jaw flexed and his breathing quickened. “You don't need me falling all over you like an idiot!”

“I might not need you to, but that doesn't mean I don't want you to.”

Matt couldn't mask the smile that crept over his face after hearing that.

“Let me make you some breakfast.”

“That would be great.”