Status: I update as much as I can!

Speak to Me

Chapter Eight

Kellin and I sat in the living room watching tv for the remainder of the day. I think we've had enough shit to deal with this morning, so we just wanted to relax. My phone buzzed in my pocket, so without looking at the contact, I answered.

"Hello?" I asked.

"Vic?? Where are you?" Ash yelled through the phone.

"Fuck!" I yelled, startling Kellin. I mouthed an apology to him before returning to my phone call. "I completely forgot Ash, I'm so sorry." I apologized, hoping she wouldn't be too mad.

"Fine, but after today no more? I need you here, it gets kind of boring." She said. I laughed, relieved that she didn't kill me.

"Okay, see you tomorrow." I told her, letting her say goodbye before I ended the call. I looked over at Kellin who was watching me intensly. His face was hard to read, but when he texted me I couldn't help but smile.

'Who was that? Ex girlfriend? Current girlfriend?'I just laughed, but he didn't seem to catch the joke. 'What's so funny? I don't understand?'

"Kellin, I'm gay. I'm pretty sure you know this." I giggled, but he still didn't laugh.

'Well Victor said he was gay, but he had a different girl over every night. When I would confront him about it, he'd just say that he's only gay for me and that he loves me. And he does love me, I know he does.' Okay, that hurt me a bit. I know Kellin and I aren't dating, but it hurts to know he still thinks of him that way.

"Kellin, if he really loved you he wouldn't hurt you. You should never lay a hand on someone you love, it's just not right." I told him, but he shook his head.

'You don't know him Vic. He did love me! He wasn't always like that, he was just in a bad mood.' I know love makes people do crazy things but that's too far.

"The bruises and cuts tell a different story, but whatever Kellin." I dismissed him. You can't blame me, I was pissed. How could someone be so blind? We stood in silence for a while, but I didn’t know what else to say.

'Vic? I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you mad, please talk to me.'Without a sound, I felt his sadness. It wasn't him I was mad at, it was that stupid asshole for making him this way.

"I'm not mad at you Kells. Come on, let's play a game. I want to get to know you better and I don't know if you feel the same but oh well, that's what we're going to do." I told him, giving him a smile. He seemed to be okay with it as he smiled back.

"Okay, so let's start with the basics. Your full name, your age and your birthday?" I ask him, watching as he types.

'My name is Kellin Quinn, I'm 22 years old and my birthday is April 24th.'

"No middle name?" I asked.

'Quinn is my middle name. I don't use my actual last name because of my past, so technically my last name is my middle name. Anyways, what about you?'

"My name is Victor Vincent Fuentes, I'm 23 years old and my birthday is February 10th. What do you want to do in life?" I didn't feel like asking him anything too personal, so I just kept things small and simple.

'I'm studying to become an english teacher. This is my last year at San Diego State so I'm really excited to start teaching. I've always had a love for literature, reading and writing help me escape the world even if it's for a couple of hours. Sorry, I'm blabbing nonsense.'

"I think that's amazing honestly. I can see why you're always in my store." I joked, causing the most beautiful sound to erupt from his mouth. His laugh was definitely something I want to hear more of. "But you say you write? Exactly what do you write? Fiction, nonfiction, mystery, crime?" I asked him. I was genuinly interested in his hobby and I don't know why.

'I barely write if I'm being honest. I mean I have a few, all nonfiction but focused on realistic topics. I like to write about things people can relate to, something they can read to escape their lives, good or bad. I just like pretending to be someone else for awhile, as crazy as it sounds. But I'm pretty sure everyone has had their moments like that. Whether they are watching a movie or reading a book, they wish they were that person for a split second, and that's what I do. I'm sorry, this all went on me. What about you? What do you want to do?' I couldn't answer quickly, I was stuck in a trance formed by his words. He had a point, almost everyone has that one character they wish it could be. For me it would be Wayne from Wayne's world. He was living the life in my opinion. I was snapped back into reality when Kellin snapped his fingers in front of my face.

"Huh? Oh um well I got a degree in Arts, specifically music. I wanted to pursue a career as a musician but I know that's never going to happen. I was thinking of becoming a music teacher but instead I found a job at the bookstore and I love it there. I know it's not much but it's a place I love to be at and I'll take that over being unhappy in a school filled with kids that hate everything. Although I was one of those kids." I laughed at the memory. I looked up at his big smile, loving the way it could make a dark room light up.

'I think that's wonderful Vic. Do you play any instruments?' I nod. Can you show me?' I nod again, motioning him to follow me to my room. I point for him to sit on my bed, while I grab my guitar before sitting beside him.

"Okay this isn't finished but please bare with me, I know I'm not the best in the world." I laugh before playing a song I had written a long time ago.

"Can we lose our minds
And call it love for the last time?
My darling never rest
Until the darker gets
The best of all we had
Can the cold carry on?

When the light means nothing to you
Then no one would know
The sound of a ghost
And I might be perfect with you
But no one would know
So tell me, tell me

Have you ever really danced on the edge?
Is something still scaring you?
Have you ever really danced on the edge?
The count of three is up
Have you ever really danced on the edge?
All right, then, tell me so
Have you ever really danced on the edge?
Just hold my hand and jump."

I let the guitar strum a bit longer before stopping all together. I didn't think it was good honestly, I had a lot to practice on. That's why I couldn't be a music teacher, everything just had to be perfect or I wouldn't be satisfied. I was snapped out of my inner battle by Kellin placing his hand on mine and showing me his phone with the other.

'Vic, that was beautiful. You're really, really talented. Stop beating yourself up about it.' Okay, that made me feel better about it. But I knew it was going to take more than his words for me to be comfortable with my work. I sighed, looking up at him while letting a small smile creep on my face. Before I knew it, his lips were on mine once again. Unlike this morning, this kiss lasted. I couldn't help but kiss back, but I soon pulled away. I sighed, quickly looking away.

"Kellin, we can't keep doing this. I don't want to be a rebound for Victor and I know that you still have feelings for him. If I'm wrong, then I need to know. I need to know the truth Kellin." I complained.

'Look Vic, I like you okay? Believe me when I say that because it's true. And yes, after everything Victor put me through I still have small feelings for him. I mean, we were together for a long time so it's no surprise as to why I can't just drop everything I've felt for him. But with you Vic, I feel something that I've never felt with him. Your kisses are way better, they make my stomach do flips. I just, there's something about you that makes me feel safe but I don't want to hurt you.' He explained to me, and I understood. I wasn't expecting him to drop all his feelings for Victor, I just didn't like the fact that he made excuses for every time Victor laid a hand on him.

"Kellin, have you ever seen your life coach?" I asked. This was a question that was constantly eating at me, a question that I should've asked the first time we kissed.

'Honestly no. I never felt the need to and Victor said he didn't want people budding into our relationship. Now that I think of it, I never got a look at his wrist.'

"Kellin, can I see your wrist?" I ask him cautiously. He shook his head no. "Why not?" I ask. I didn't want to push him, but I didn't want to get fucked over either. He could've been with Victor because he liked him, not because that was the name that was tattooed on his wrist.

'I don't want you to be mad at me, or judge me.' I felt as if I was making him uncomfortable, but that's not what I wanted to do at all. I just wanted to make this situation make sense.

"I won't judge you, I promise." I reassured him. I could tell he was a bit skeptical on showing me, but caved in when I showed him my puppy eyes. When he lifted up the sleeve of his sweater, I saw nothing. I was surprised at first, but then I noticed the black ink on his wrist, crossed out by various scars. I went to open my mouth, but he signalled for me to stay quiet. I waited patiently as he typed out his response to me.

'On the nights he would hit me, while he was passed out..I cut over his name. I don't even know how I'm still alive. I remember promising myself that if I ever leave him, I would forget all of this soulmate shit and never interact with another Victor again. I would never catch feelings again, and I would stay alone. But then you came and you wouldn't fucking leave me alone. So I broke my promise to myself. I'm not alone, I did catch feelings, and I'm associating myself with another Victor. You're insulted I know, but believe me when I say that I feel like I'm making the best mistake of my life.'I couldn't help but smile at that. Trust me, I completely understand his trust issues, his fear and his motives. He's trying to protect himself from falling into the wrong hands, but what he doesn't know is that he's fallen into the right hands. Or so I hope.

"Kellin, I want you to come with me to see my life coach tomorrow. If it's meant to be, then we will work on whatever we have. But if it isn't meant to be.." I trailed off, trying to ignore the pang of sadness that hit my chest. "We can't continue this. I mean, we'll be friends and I'll always be there for you. But whatever we have now, can't continue if I'm not the Vic you're meant to be with. Okay?" I told him. He looked sad, but nodded anyways. I went to speak again, but was interrupted by my brother walking into my room. What the hell, I didn't even hear him come in.

"Vic, I want to apologize..to the both of you." He said, looking at Kellin and I. We exchanged glances before allowing Mike to speak.

"I guess I'll start with Kellin first." He sighed before turning to Kellin. "Look we got off on the wrong foot. I'm not the asshole you saw earlier, I promise you that. The reason why I flipped is because honestly, I feel like you would be toxic for my brother. Why? Because I had a friend who went through the same thing and now she's dead. I was a mess after that and I wouldn't wish that on anyone. But I've never seen Vic happier. When he talks about you, he can't stop smiling. I know he has it bad so I hope you're the right Kellin. I guess along the line, I can learn to trust you but I need you to promise me something. I need you to keep him safe. I know he can handle himself, but I don't know what I would do if he got hurt emotionally or physically. So please, be good to my brother. Oh and you can still hang with Alysha." He breathed out, earning a nod and a smile from Kellin. Mike knew he didn't speak so he didn't push for a verbal response, which I was thankful for. That also reminded me, I had to tell Mike about Tay.

"Vic, I know I snapped on you about Tay but you had to understand where I was coming from."

"Mike-" I tried interrupting but he wouldn't let me.

"I'm sorry for acting out the way I did, it was wrong of me. It's just I don't want to see you go down the road I did. It was a horrible time for me, I think we both knew that. You're living a good life Vic, and I'd kill myself if I let anything bad happen to you."

"Mike, listen to me." I tried again.

"I just want to say I'm sorry and that I love you." He finished, pulling me into a hug. I hugged him back.

"Okay, you're forgiven. Now there's something I have to show you." I told him cautiously. I didn't know how he would react to this. As well with Kellin, he probably doesn't know what happened or maybe he does. But I don't understand why I've never seen him around when I used to hang around with Mike, Tay and Sydney. They never even mentioned a brother.

"Okay, first off take a seat." I ordered him. He complied, taking a seat at the desk in the corner of my room. "Kellin, can I see your phone for a minute." I asked him. His eyebrows furrowed as he looked at me in confusion, handing me his phone. I clicked the button showing the picture on the homescreen before handing it to Mike. He examined it for a second before his eyes went wide with anger.

"Is this supposed to be joke?" He seethed.

"Mike do you know who that is?" I ask, knowing it was a dumb question.

"That's not really her is it?" Watching as he stared at the phone. "Why are you showing me this? When did you guys meet? I've never seen you until recently" He asked both Kellin and I.

"That's her Mike, that's Taylor. The sister of Kellin, and your best friend who is very much alive." I told him slowly, hoping the calmness of my voice would soothe him. I was wrong.

"What the fuck are you talking about? Taylor is dead! She never even mentioned a brother Vic. This isn't fucking funny." He yelled at me, tears slipping through his eyes.

"Mike, believe me when I say that she is alive. I know it's confusing but why don't we let Kellin explain this shit to us okay? But I need you to calm down." I told him, watching as he controlled his breathing. Mike handed the phone back to Kellin, and it wasn't until another 30 minutes when we finally received our answer.

'Yes Taylor is my sister. When Taylor, Sydney and I were young we had the perfect family. It wasn't until I turned 17 when things got bad. My dad started drinking, he would take it out on me and my mother. We couldn't deal with it anymore, so we left. My mother and I moved to Florida because that's the farthest place we could think to get away from him. When the doctor called me to tell me about what happened to Tay, I blamed myself. I knew it should've been me who stayed. I knew my mother should've taken her instead, but she refused. She said that he would never lay a hand on his precious little girls. She was wrong. I didn't hesitate before packing my bags and catching the next flight to California. As soon as I got off my 5 hour flight, I headed straight to the hospital. They told me it was too late, that her guardian gave permission to pull the plug. But I begged them not to, I begged them to give it another day or two. I was family, they had no other choice but to listen to me. The second day, she woke up with slight memory loss. She didn't remember anything after my mother and I leaving. I told her that she had to come with us to Florida, and she was more than glad. So now that's where she lives. The only reason I came back here was because my soulmate lives here and I wanted a chance for happiness.'I finished reading the text out loud, not remembering the exact moment Kellin slipped his hand in mine. Or the exact moment that Mike and I started crying. But I do know we finally got the truth.

"Y-You said she has slight memory loss? Does she remember me?" Mike sniffled, his voice hopeful. Kellin nodded his head. Then he did something we weren't expecting, he talked once again.

"She remembers both of you." His voice raspy from not being used in so long. I could tell he didn't like the sound of it, but I loved it. He begged for his phone back, but I refused to give it to him. I wanted to hear his voice more, I wanted him to try talking to me again.

"Please, talk to me Kells. I don't know why you don't use your voice but it's absolutely beautiful." He blushed at the nickname and the compliment before nodding.

"I told her about you yesterday." He stared up at me. "She told me that she hopes I'm right this time. She told me you're a good guy. I think I believe her." He smiled at me, I could tell his eyes were getting watery from the stinging in his throat, but he was trying. I ordered Mike to go get some water for him and thankfully he did it quick. After he drank a little, his voice wasn't as raspy as before but still a bit quiet. He turned to Mike next, laughing at how emotional he was. Who wouldn't be? Finding out your best friend is alive after 3 years? That's the best news anyone could have ever asked for.

"She misses you. She always talked about you, but I never knew who you actually were. She doesn't remember dying or the abuse from my dad, so please don't ever bring it up. You can call her if you want, just please be gentle." He told Mike, handing him his phone. Mike trampled Kellin into a hug, pulling away as soon as he hissed in pain.

"Thanks Kellin, you really aren't that bad." Mike says before leaving the room. I couldn't be happier at the moment, things were finally looking up.

"You're really amazing you know that?" I asked him but he just shook his head.

"Can I please stop talking?" He asked me, completely ignoring my question. I nodded though, I knew it's going to have to be something we will work on within time. We laid on my bed, his head on my chest my arm wrapped around him. I think I could get used to this, I hope I'm right with this one.

Tomorrow was only a few hours away. It will either make us or break us, and the anticipation was killing me. Please let Kellin be mine.
♠ ♠ ♠
3448 words! Omg I hope you guys enjoy me updating again! I know this chapter is really long but I felt like writing some fluffy things for you guys. The next chapter, wont be so fluffy. I'll probably update sunday or next week since I already updated twice and now I really need to focus on my school work. HEY IF ANYONE WANTS TO TUTOR ME IN TRIGONOMETRY OR PHYSICS PLEASE BE MY GUEST.

Anyways leave comments. It would really mean a lot to me if I knew how you guys felt about the story c: Thank you, I love you all!

-lissy c: