Let Bygones Be Bygones (2 of 3)

I shiver a little and pull the blanket around me a little more, the cold is bearable but I would like to not be cold as soon as possible. Some of our clothing items are in front of the fire drying from our little swim in the lake so that we were not seen by any more guards, of the spies that Bain mentioned.
“It may not be the best fit, but they'll keep you warm.” Bard says as Sigrid passes out spare clothes and more blankets.

Bilbo thanks her when he receives one. I look over to him and notice that he's shivering. I look down at myself holding the blanket around myself and since I'm not too cold I take it off and put the warm blanket around Bilbo's back and shoulders. He looks at me surprised before starting to protest.
“No. I-” I shake my head before he can finish what he's starting to say.
“You're shivering. And I don't feel the cold very much, it's a dwarf thing” I say softly smiling.
Bard is stirring a stew that Sigrid had put on for us at her fathers request. After she hands out all the clothes and blankets she goes into the kitchen and gets bowls and spoons ready for when the food is cooked.

It's not long before it is cooked and she starts handing out bowls. Bilbo and I thank her ash she hands us a bowl and some bread, Bilbo tucks right in, grateful for something hot in his stomach. I can't help but look around at them and remember what Bard has said to Alfrid that food is scarce. They are sharing what little they have with us, Bard may have been reluctant to help at first but he is showing us every kindness he can.

We quietly eat our bread and stew and when few have finished Sigrid and Bard go around starting to collect the bowls. I stand up and take Bilbo's empty bowl and a few others closer to me. And follow Sigrid and Bard to the kitchen sink.
“Allow me? You've done more than enough for us, at least let me do one thing in return” I say to Sigrid, she looks at her father and he looks at me for a moment before nodding to his daughter. I nod at Bard “Thank you for all the help. You didn't have to do all this for us, yet you are.” I say as I start to wash the bowls.
He looks away a little for a moment “My wife used to say that if you carry out random acts of kindness one day someone might do the same for you, but even if they don't you were still kind enough to think of others before yourself and that makes you a better person” he says softly, now looking back to me and smiling a little. I can't help but just look at him thoughtfully. Eventually I respond.
“No one can doubt that you are a good man, a far better man than the one who is in charge of this town, If that Alfrid is anything to go by that is.”
He chuckles a little. “As far as Alfrid and The Master go you have gotten that right ” I finish up the dishes and dry them. I ask where to put them and Bard opens a cupboard and takes the dishes off me

“A Dwarvish Wind-Lance.” I hear Thorin say from in the other room. I only heard because of my elvish hearing, it was said quite quietly. I walk into the other room curiously to see Thorin looking out of the window which is open a jar, as soon as I look I can also see it. Bilbo, who is sipping a hot drink from a wooden mug, looks out of the window also.

“You look like you’ve seen a ghost.” Bilbo says because of the expression on Thorin's face, which I only see as I move closer to them.
“He has. The last time we saw such a weapon, a city was on fire. It was the day the dragon came.”
Thorin looks away remembering the day as clear as if it was yesterday. “The day that Smaug destroyed Dale. Girion, the Lord of the city, rallied his bowman to fire upon the beast.” I hear Bard enter the room from the kitchen “But a dragon’s hide is tough, tougher than the strongest armor. Only a black arrow, fired from a wind-lance, could have pierced the dragon’s hide, and few of those arrows were ever made. His store was running low when Girion made his last stand.”

“Had the aim of Men been true that day, much would have been different.” Thorin says. This comment irritates me a little, he blames everyone but dwarves for what happened at Erebor. But also how can he not? Elves didn't help, men couldn't kill the dragon, so Erebor was lost. Men and Dwarves died. But hatreds held for so long often fester.

“You speak as if you were there.”  Bard says noting the anger in his voice
“All dwarves know the tale.” Thorin replies simply
“Then you would know that Girion hit the dragon. He loosened a scale under the left wing. One more shot and he would have killed the beast.” Bain says very defensively then looks to his father. Bard doesn't react.
“Ha ha ha! That’s a fairy story, lad. Nothing more.” Dwalin says
“You took our money. Where are the weapons?” Thorin asks as he walks towards Bard.
“Wait here.” Bard says before leaving the main living area.

I walk over to Bain as Fili and Kili move towards Thorin.
“Bain, this, tell me about this scale?” I ask as we walk away from the group of dwarves.
“Why? You won't believe me, none of the others do I saw it in the looks on their faces, but I know what I know. The others just see me as a boy with my head in the clouds” he replies
“Do you think I would be asking you about it if I thought that?” He looks at me for a moment before looking towards where his father went.
“My father doesn't want me to talk about it, but. In the stories. Just before Girion died while trying to kill the dragon he shot a black arrow at the dragon's chest removing a scale. If he had been able to fire one more shot he would have killed it. I know it” I nod and look away in thought, if this story is true, maybe we have a chance to kill the dragon, not just to retrieve the Arkenstone. I hear raised voices back in the other room and I hear Gloin's voice first “We paid you for weapons. Iron-forged swords and axes!”
“It’s a joke!” I then here Bofur say. I turn around and walk back into the other room and I see them all looking at makeshift weapons distastefully.
“You won’t find better outside the city armoury. All iron-forged weapons are held there under lock and key.” Bard states to the disorderly bunch in front of him. I notice Bilbo sitting off to one side and go and sit next to him.
“Chase, where have you been?” He asks surprised
“I was having a word with Bard's son about this loose scale story, it's one I have never heard before. If it's true, we may be able to kill the dragon and regain Erebor, hopefully without waking him up.”

I look back to the company as Balin tries to reason with Thorin.
“Why not take what’s been offered and go? I’ve made do with less; so have you. I say we leave now.”
“You’re not going anywhere.” Bard states firmly, his offer of help was rejected rudely and there are spies watching his house so he's looking out for his family.
“What did you say!?” Dwalin says striding over to him.
“There’s spies watching this house and probably every dock and wharf in the town. You must wait till nightfall.” I forgot the others probably wouldn't have heard that about the spies when Bain mentioned it. I only heard because I have better hearing than the average dwarf.
The company settle down after hearing about the spies and Bard wraps up the weapons and takes them back to where he got them.
I cross my arms on the table and flop my head down. I hope we haven't gotten Bard into trouble, and knowing how stubborn Thorin is I hope he doesn't think of something that could get Bard into trouble. Being in the company has just given me more to worry and think about. When I was on my own I never had to look out for anyone other than Fealof and myself. If I could go back to the start of this journey I wouldn't change any of it. Well, maybe a few things, but who wouldn't if they could. I chuckle to myself and sit up. Bilbo looks at me amused but questioningly.
“What's so funny?” he asks smiling
“I'm just thinking back to when this quest started and how different we all were. Now look at us” I say smiling
“Freezing cold and soaked while out on a quest compared to warm and cosy with book about someone doing the same kind of thing?” he jests
I laugh a little “Yes, exactly that. Who would have known how different we would have been?” I say softly. I see Bard with the corner of my eye, causing me to look towards him.
“I agree, It's hard to think of myself as the same Hobbit any more.” he says thoughtfully.
“Aye. I concur” I say nodding and looking back to Bilbo smiling softly. We sit there quietly and I find myself looking over at Thorin not really concentrating. I realise he's looking at me too and I look away slowly, but I glance back and he has looked away.
“What happened between you two?” Bilbo asks. I look at him surprised and he looks at Thorin. “Between you and Thorin” he says looking back to me “It seems like you were close, but then... Something happened” he says quizzically.
I nod. “Yeah, you could say that...” I say quietly. He must notice that I do not really want to talk about it right now because he leaves it at that.

“I'm going to go and find out what we're going to do, it looks like they have an idea” The Hobbit says standing up and walking over to an unsure looking Bailn who is standing with Thorin and Dwalin who have just called Fili and Kili over to them.

I sit there following the wood patterns in the table with my finger. I don't register someone sitting next to me until they speak.
“You look deep in thought, what is bothering you?”
I jump as I hear Thorin's voice. I look at him surprised and breath out.
“Forgive me, I did not mean to startle you.”
“It's not a problem, what are we doing, I'm guessing there's a plan?” I say as I regain my composure.
“There is a plan but I would rather discuss what is on your mind first” he says.
I look around the room feeling a little bit awkward and I notice it's actually quite dull and a few candles have been lit, I must have been daydreaming for a few hours at least, which surprises me, but of what I don't recall. I finally look back to him but I can't help but keep looking elsewhere. We have not spoken properly for years, I wouldn't even know how to start. We've been being civil but we've not really had much opportunity to talk. So I start with the first feeling that I register. Disbelief.

“Just being this close to the mountain again after so long, it doesn't feel real, it's like one of the dreams I used to have, but after a while those dreams of home stopped, and all thoughts of returning faded into all but an ember. But always longing for somewhere to call my home again but never finding anywhere. So I became a tavern crawler, I've drank in probably all taverns all over the map” I chuckle a little “I used to be happy with that thought, the summit of my achievements.” I say smiling, but my smile soon fades as I get serious “But when Gandalf came to me about coming on a quest to try and reclaim Erebor, a quest that could kill me or where I get to see home again, I couldn't refuse, how could I pass up the opportunity to return? Whether we were to fail or not, whether we do succeed, or die trying, at least either way there will be no more longing for a home. Many times I thought about leaving, sometimes I almost did, but something always stopped me from going through with it. Something other than my promise to Bilbo” I am able to look at him without looking away. He's looking at me listening intently to every word I say “I think the best way to explain it is: If I gave up on this I would never forgive myself, if I didn't even start this journey then it feels as though the embers will just go out and I would be a hollow shell. Just a wandering drunk with no purpose.” I say quietly “But now we're this close” I start to raise my voice a little “That was the spark needed to get the fire burning again. We will retake” I say the last part mostly to myself as I look away towards the fire

“I can see that this has been on your mind for a long time...” he goes quiet for a moment. “Chase, you have no idea how much I regret what I did to you and your parents-” He starts
“Thorin... I forgave you a long time ago, believe it or not. You had your reasons. We can't change the past, we can't see the future, but we can decide what to do in the present. You have to let that go.” I say quietly still looking at the fire.
“And What if I can not?” He asks causing me to look at him
There's nothing else to say so we just stare at each other, I don't know if I am imagining it or not but he seems to be leaning closer slowly.
“Thorin.” Dwalin says suddenly as he turns the corner from the main doorway causing us to look at him. “We should go” he states looking between us for a moment before he speaks.
“Go?” I ask looking between the two of them.
“I will explain on the way.” he says to me as he stands up “Come on” he says to everyone who immediately stand up and follow unquestionably.
“Wait, where are you going? You can't go” Bain says to try and stop the stubborn dwarves. I stop in front of him and look at him apologetically.
“Whatever they are going to do this will not come back to cause problems for you, your sisters and your father, I promise” I state before following after the dwarves.