I'm in Hate With You
"You say that a lot."
I was awoken to kisses on my neck.
"Daniel ! Stop !" I groaned.
"I'm sorry," he said between kisses.
"You say that a lot," I observed.
"Ya, well, I mean it. I just wasn't used to us being... so..." he trailed off trying to find the word.
"Normal ?" I questioned, my mind slightly scattered.
"Ya," he allowed, kissing my neck again.
Why was he doing this ? Why the hell were his kisses making me feel so damn weird ? "Daniel, why are you kissing my neck ?" I questioned.
"Maybe..." He kissed my neck again. "I like kissing your neck. Maybe your neck is the only neck I have to kiss. Is that a problem ?"
"Well, my neck you can kiss... but not anywhere else," I said.
"Can I kiss... here ?" He kissed my jawbone lightly.
"Erm... I guess..." I didn't like where this was going.
"How about... here ?" He kissed the spot right next to my mouth.
"You're pushing your luck," I told him.
"How about... here ?" Somehow, he had managed to be hovering over me, his mouth just inches from mine.
My breathing stopped, but he didn't get any closer. What the hell was he trying to pull ?
Then, I got it. He was waiting for me to come the rest of the way.
God, how I hated him ! How could he do this to me ? That... that... freaking... MONKEY !
What would I do ? On the one hand, it was so tempting. He was, very attractive, after all. The way his blue eyes were pleading with my own was just getting to be too much.
On the other hand, I could push him away, yell at him for being such a jerk, and move on and have things be the way they always were.
Did I want that ? Did I want things to always be a stand off between us ? Maybe loving him would be easier...
But I'd convinced myself I didn't love him. I couldn't- I wouldn't love him.
But despite that, I put my hands behind his head and pulled him down roughly to me.
His lips were stiff, shocked at first. Then, they melted into mine as if they'd rather be doing nothing else.
The sad part was, I liked kissing him like this. I liked it. I know that was so horrible, to like kissing someone I could never be interested in romantically. But, sometimes, I could just forget. Forget about everything we'd been through together: the fighting, the harsh words. I could just kiss him and like it.
I gently pushed my face from his. Wordlessly, I slid from under him and stepped into the bathroom, closing the door behind me.
"FUCK !" I screamed as loud as I possibly could. What the hell was going on ? Why was this happening to me ? What did I do to deserve all of this ? I never wanted it to have to be this hard ! I never wanted to be pregnant in the first place ! I hated this ! I hated my life ! I hated everyone ! I hated him !
Did I ? Did I really, deep down and truly, hate him ? The one person who'd always been able to make me smile, despite the fact he was usually making fun of me. The one person who'd always been there since he promised he would be. The one person who ever made me feel the way I did when I was around him.
I did. I was in hate with him.
The door swung open. He stood there, the man I hated with all of my being. "Lacy... Summer... I..." he trailed off, not knowing what to say.
I shook my head. "Let's forget it, all right ?" I suggested.
He simply nodded. What more was there to say ?
I wonder if I mentioned that all the times I said "hate", I meant to say "unconditionally and completely love".
"Daniel ! Stop !" I groaned.
"I'm sorry," he said between kisses.
"You say that a lot," I observed.
"Ya, well, I mean it. I just wasn't used to us being... so..." he trailed off trying to find the word.
"Normal ?" I questioned, my mind slightly scattered.
"Ya," he allowed, kissing my neck again.
Why was he doing this ? Why the hell were his kisses making me feel so damn weird ? "Daniel, why are you kissing my neck ?" I questioned.
"Maybe..." He kissed my neck again. "I like kissing your neck. Maybe your neck is the only neck I have to kiss. Is that a problem ?"
"Well, my neck you can kiss... but not anywhere else," I said.
"Can I kiss... here ?" He kissed my jawbone lightly.
"Erm... I guess..." I didn't like where this was going.
"How about... here ?" He kissed the spot right next to my mouth.
"You're pushing your luck," I told him.
"How about... here ?" Somehow, he had managed to be hovering over me, his mouth just inches from mine.
My breathing stopped, but he didn't get any closer. What the hell was he trying to pull ?
Then, I got it. He was waiting for me to come the rest of the way.
God, how I hated him ! How could he do this to me ? That... that... freaking... MONKEY !
What would I do ? On the one hand, it was so tempting. He was, very attractive, after all. The way his blue eyes were pleading with my own was just getting to be too much.
On the other hand, I could push him away, yell at him for being such a jerk, and move on and have things be the way they always were.
Did I want that ? Did I want things to always be a stand off between us ? Maybe loving him would be easier...
But I'd convinced myself I didn't love him. I couldn't- I wouldn't love him.
But despite that, I put my hands behind his head and pulled him down roughly to me.
His lips were stiff, shocked at first. Then, they melted into mine as if they'd rather be doing nothing else.
The sad part was, I liked kissing him like this. I liked it. I know that was so horrible, to like kissing someone I could never be interested in romantically. But, sometimes, I could just forget. Forget about everything we'd been through together: the fighting, the harsh words. I could just kiss him and like it.
I gently pushed my face from his. Wordlessly, I slid from under him and stepped into the bathroom, closing the door behind me.
"FUCK !" I screamed as loud as I possibly could. What the hell was going on ? Why was this happening to me ? What did I do to deserve all of this ? I never wanted it to have to be this hard ! I never wanted to be pregnant in the first place ! I hated this ! I hated my life ! I hated everyone ! I hated him !
Did I ? Did I really, deep down and truly, hate him ? The one person who'd always been able to make me smile, despite the fact he was usually making fun of me. The one person who'd always been there since he promised he would be. The one person who ever made me feel the way I did when I was around him.
I did. I was in hate with him.
The door swung open. He stood there, the man I hated with all of my being. "Lacy... Summer... I..." he trailed off, not knowing what to say.
I shook my head. "Let's forget it, all right ?" I suggested.
He simply nodded. What more was there to say ?
I wonder if I mentioned that all the times I said "hate", I meant to say "unconditionally and completely love".
♠ ♠ ♠
Wooah dude. Does she admit ? Is this acceptance ? IS IT ???Well, I need you to know I am ending this story shortly. Probably in like two chapter or so, not including the epilogue and an interview with me by Lacy and Daniel ! Ya it's weird... but kinda funny.
114 readers dude ! That's rad !!! Thank you all of the people who commented ! This story is really my baby, and I'm going to cry when it ends. Not kidding.
Woot ! Changed my username dude ! **Formerly hardcoreXsuperstar** I was listening to a To Be Juliet's Secret song, and I decided I wanted it. So... I got it.
I got the Black Parade Is Dead ! DVD FINALLY ! It's awesome ! "And we came down here to properly kill them off." I love Gerard's legs and Mikey's boots. I was sad I couldn't even see Frank's face. His fricken' hair was too long ! And Bob's hair, as Gerard said: "Bob's hair's too long. It keeps getting into his mouth. Have you seen it ? He looks like a fuckin' hippie."
So ya. That's the cool stuff. Comment.