Liability

july 31, 2014.

I ended up crying a lot more than I thought I would when I said goodbye to Sam in the middle of the departures terminal at Heathrow airport. She had dropped me off for my flight so we could get one last breakfast and coffee together before I’d have to somehow survive without her for nearly three months.

She had quickly become my other half during the rather short few years we had known each other. I don’t think we had ever gone more than a few days without seeing each other, and now I was leaving home and flying across the world with a group of people I barely knew. As we embraced in the middle of the terminal, only a few feet away from the rather long security check-in line, I sobbed into her shoulder about how I didn’t want to go.

I’m sure I looked a lot like a toddler throwing a temper tantrum before the first day of school. But I was oddly comforted when Sam cried nearly as much as I did as she squeezed me back, repeating over and over again that this was the best thing for me to be doing right now. As she repeated the words over and over to me, I knew she was saying them to try and comfort her own emotions in addition to convincing me this was actually the best thing for me to do. I didn’t want to leave the comfort of London. I especially didn’t want to leave Sam, my personal safety blanket for the last few years.

Leaving probably was the best thing for me, because things with Jackson had not gotten any better.

I had told Lou, Sam, and Gemma that night we stayed far too late at Bleach that if in a few weeks Jackson was still harassing me I’d take legal action to protect myself, or just up and leave London for a bit with Lou. I had more made the empty promises in an attempt to please them all so the topic of conversation could be dropped and I wouldn’t have to listen to their nagging any longer. Gemma had gone with me the following weekend to file the beginnings of a restraining order, but apparently they took a lot of time and paperwork to be put into action. They were not the instantaneous solution that movies and books had led me to believe they were. So last night I was forced to dig out my passport from the back of the miscellaneous kitchen drawer where I had put it and start packing a suitcase because I was going on One Direction’s North American tour.

The only other time I had left the UK was to go to Spain when I was rather young, but I recall crying and feeling sick the entire brief flight there and back, so an 8 hour flight to Canada seemed a bit like a death sentence.

The night before, all of Lou and I’s friends and family had gotten together for a little farewell dinner and Lou briefed me on all of the big responsibilities I’d have on this tour. She insisted that all of the crew, and even the boys, that I had met in Paris were ecstatic that I would be joining them, and that there was no reason to be nervous. The lads were all easygoing and tour had never actually felt like work for her. Tour was going to be a breeze were her exact words, if I could recall correctly.

I appreciated her encouragement, but I also knew I was nowhere near as free spirited or easygoing as Lou was so there was no way I would adjust to this lifestyle as well or even just as quickly as she had.

Sam repeated a lot of the same things her twin sister had told me that morning over breakfast, but as she dropped me off at the airport, Lou and the rest of her crew already waiting for me on the other side of security in a private lounge reserved exclusively for tour and band crew members, her confidence in the idea was beginning to crack. She knew I was going to be homesick, and I felt as though she was going to be just as lonely without me back in London with her every day. I had tried to convince her to come with us on tour, but she was far more important to Bleach than I was and she was actually needed back at the salon. They were preparing for the grand opening of a new location inside the TopShop store on Oxford Street in the heart of London, a key event that required the owner of the franchise to actually be in the country. I was just a lowbrow hair stylist who’s clients would barely even recognize that I was away.

I was full on having a sob when I gave Sam her final hug goodbye and lugged all of my bags to the security checkpoint. I cried through most of my wait in line, and had finally managed to reduce my emotions to red, puffy eyes and a serious case of the sniffles by the time I made it through the other side. I was typing out a text to Sam letting her know I had made it through and that I already missed her tremendously when a thick, Northern English accent called my name out.

The terminal I was in was relatively empty, but every set of eyes was on me as a rather large security guard approached me. I froze in place, iPhone still clutched firmly in my hands as I stared with wide eyes at the man approaching me. It took me a few moments to recognize him as Preston, the security guard who had taken care of my drink orders during our night out in Paris to celebrate my birthday.

“Trixie, yeah?” He repeated, this time much quieter as he had finally reached me.

I just nodded my head slowly, unsure of what else exactly to do.

“You alright, love?”

I’m sure I looked like an absolute mess, obvious signs that I had just had a rather good cry on my face. “I’m alright now, thanks.” I offered.Vague answers seemed to be my specialty lately.

He nodded shortly, adjusting the laminated lanyard that hung around his neck. It had the One Direction logo on it, as well as a small picture of his face and some fine print below it. It then occurred to me that he had probably recognized me from the nearly identical lanyard that hung around my neck. Lou had called me at the last minute to remind me to wear the lanyard she had given to me last night, as it was basically my key to being let into the lounge, or anywhere near the band and crew. She claimed I wouldn’t need it for long, just until all of security became familiar with my face.

I’m sure Preston was going to remember me as the girl who was always a blubbering mess.

“I was sent to come get ya. We’re gettin’ ready to board soon.”

I had arrived at the airport with Sam with plenty of time before my flight was supposed to leave, but apparently our tearful goodbye had taken up quite a bit more time than either of us had thought if they were now preparing to board.

“Right, of course.” I mumbled as I followed his large figure down a series of velvet roped corridors and locked doors until we reached a nearly empty airport lounge. It looked like what I pictured a typical first class lounge would look like, but the fact that there were no more than 20 people, large security guards excluded, led me to believe that the crew had reserved the entire area. The crew in charge of lights, sound and the building of the actual stage had been flown out a few days before to start getting venues ready. This was apparently a normal thing, as they would always be travelling a few days ahead of us so cities would be ready for the boys to perform as soon as we arrived. Flying out of London today was just the boys, their band, Lou, myself, and the boys’ personal stylists. I’m sure there were many other people who worked behind the scenes to make One Direction function, but it appeared as though they liked to keep their entourage rather minimal when travelling. I assumed the larger the group, the more attention they would attract, and the harder it would be to escape from fans and paparazzi.

I thanked Preston for coming to fetch me, and sheepishly made my way over to where Lou was seated on a couch, next to a fast asleep Lux.

If Lux, at nearly three years old, was so nonchalant about flying that she could be sleeping right before the plane was set to take off, I could definitely handle this. I was twenty-two years old. I was a god damn adult.

I flopped down next to Lou, dropping my backpack and carry on suitcase in a heaping mess of a pile at my feet. I had probably overpacked for this tour, but I wasn’t sure how many different occasions I’d need outfits for so I had packed for every single possible scenario. The bright salmon coloured backpack that now rested at my seat was crammed full of books, my journal, and my laptop, all items I deemed a necessity for keeping me calm on this long haul of a flight.

“You look rather excited, babes.” She joked as she looked up from the phone she had just been typing on. Dry sarcasm was definitely a trait that ran in the Teasdale family.

I gave her a weak smile, which I’m sure must have been really convincing as I could feel that my cheeks were still tight with dried tears stained across them. “Just a little nervous about the flight.” I muttered out, using the sleeve of my grey pullover sweater to wipe furiously at my cheeks.

I’m sure there were a million and one motherly things Lou wanted to say to me in that moment as she frowned at me, but instead she just nodded her head and reached into the purse that was resting on the couch next to her. Pulling out a boarding pass, she handed it to me along with a rather professional looking piece of paper. “Here’s your ticket for the flight, and that-“ She nodded towards the piece of paper. “-is the itinerary for the day. They hand out daily schedules to keep us all in the loop and on track.”

I let my eyes skim over the page as I thanked her. At the top of the page it read Toronto, Canada, a helpful tidbit for keeping track of what city we were going to be in. I figured that would become very useful when you were waking up in a brand new city practically every day. Since today was strictly a travel day and the first show wasn’t until tomorrow, the itinerary simply had the flight and hotel check-in accounted for. We’d be arriving in Toronto in the evening local time according to this schedule, so I figured nothing more exciting than grabbing dinner before retiring to the hotel for the night would be taking place. Management probably wanted the boys to rest up and Lou’s boyfriend wasn’t going to be coming out to join us on tour until later on so she was going to be on full mum duty with Lux.

Using the back of my sleeve I made one last attempt to rub away any evidence of my pre-flight cry with Sam as Lou went back to typing away on her phone. I took out my own phone, opening the front facing camera in order to assess my appearance. I wanted to at least make myself look a little bit presentable for my first impression with the crew.

Lou had offered me more than a few pieces of wisdom to prepare me for life on the road, her number one tip being to get my hair done right before leaving because bleach sessions and root touchups were not nearly as glamorous on the road as they were back home at the salon. Alex and I had taken care of that the day before, leaving my hair in a naturally wavy state to be as low maintenance for the flight as possible. Low maintenance was also a top tip from Lou. Keep travel outfits casual, something you wouldn’t mind being stuck sitting in for hours on end. I had picked comfort over fashion today, settling for jean cut off shorts and a plain grey pullover sweater, a pair of black Ray Ban sunglasses hung loosely from the collar of the sweater. Lou’s outfit mirrored my own, so I figured I was on the right track.

She also warned me to be careful of social media. Once I was officially linked with the band and crew, fans were sure to start flocking to any accounts I had, usually in search of fresh dirt on any of the boys in the band. Therefore, anything you weren’t completely comfortable with the entire world knowing needed to be kept off social media. Apparently management would also most likely be sitting down to talk with me about what is and is not appropriate for sharing. Currently my Instagram feed was nothing more than a few crap selfies, and my Twitter and Facebook accounts had been deleted awhile ago in an attempt to fully rid Jackson from my life. I just couldn’t part with my Instagram account, though, as I was far too addicted to the app to actually delete it. I had changed my account settings to private, however, and had received a few hundred follow requests after Lou had tweeted about me earlier that morning.

I was already feeling overwhelmed by the world I was about to enter into.

“Are we sitting together on this flight?” I asked Lou as I slipped my phone back into my pocket. It took her a few seconds to answer, and I instantly knew it was a no. Lou was just brain storming the nicest ways to break the news to me that I would be travelling across the Atlantic Ocean, completely leaving everything I once knew as a comfort zone, and I wasn’t even going to have someone I knew with me while I did it.

“We’ve got almost the entire first class section of the plane booked out, so we’ll all be together.” She spoke slowly, obviously being careful with her word choice. “They’ve got us all in pairs, so I’m with Lux.”

“Oh, yeah. Of course.” I guess that was only fair. Lux needed her mum with her on the flight more than I needed Lou.

“I think we’re the row just ahead of ya, so I’m right there if you need anything.”

All I did was nod my head, as I noticed the people around us begin to gather their stuff up to prepare for boarding. “I’m sure I’ll be fine, Lou.”

“We put you with Harry, so at least you’ll have someone with you that you’ve met before.”

That was at least a little bit comforting knowing I wasn’t completely alone, but I still didn’t really know Harry. I had only met him once, but I guess it was more than I had interacted with anyone else in the group. Although, I was about to sit next to him for upwards of 8 straight hours, so I guess I was about to get to know him.

“He usually sleeps during most flights, so the knobhead shouldn’t be too annoying.” Lou absentmindedly gestured over her right shoulder to where I assumed Harry must have been as Lux finally began to stir from her slumber. “You sure you’re going to be alright, love?”

Lou’s gaze was now fixed firmly on me, her eyebrows raised expectantly as she awaited my answer. I took the time to fully take in my surroundings, glancing in the direction Lou had just motioned in to notice Harry and his bandmate Liam seated on a nearly identical couch to the one Lou, Lux, and I were currently on. The two boys were talking rather animatedly, and when Harry noticed me staring over in his direction he waved, earning a wave from Liam as well when he noticed where Harry was looking.

“Yeah. I think I’ll survive, Lou.”

*******

Harry had his headphones on, sunk down low in his partially reclined seat and his eyes firmly closed. I’m sure we couldn’t have been that far into our flight, but he was so used to this jet setting life that he appeared to be fast asleep. Falling asleep and taking any rest wherever you could get it had to be a talent quickly picked up by any jet setting pop star. I knew when we’d land there’d be a huge timezone difference, I just didn’t know when it was. If I didn’t sleep now, would I get an opportunity to rest when we landed? Or would we be arriving and getting thrust immediately into work?

The thought of time zones and travel was making my head pound, and the dry recycled air of the plane cabin wasn’t doing me any favours.

I shut the cover of the book in my lap, and tossed it onto the tray table that was down in front of me. My mind was far too cloudy to focus on the words printed across the worn pages. Perhaps I could watch a movie instead, so I reached down to grab my own headphones out of my backpack that I had shoved into the storage compartment under the seat in front of me. Slipping them on and plugging them in, I began to scroll through the personal television screen that every seat had, hoping a movie title would jump out at me.

When we had boarded the plane, Harry had politely said hello to me and we made small talk during the safety briefing and take off. He seemed to be a naturally polite person, and part of me was convinced he kept the conversation going for so long because he could tell how nervous I was. At the first lull in conversation, however, he slipped his headphones on and shut his eyes. I wasn’t offended by his actions, as I’m sure I would have done the exact same thing if every nerve in my body wasn’t on edge at that exact moment.

Out brief conversation hadn’t been particularly groundbreaking, just quick sentiments of ‘how have you been’ and ‘hope you’re excited for tour’ were exchanged before he was snoring softly. Now I needed to find something to do to preoccupy myself for the next few hours. Harry had the aisle seat, so getting up to go find Lou who was seated a couple rows in front of us would require waking or climbing over Harry, neither of which I wanted to do.

I still felt so out of place, especially in the first class section of a transatlantic flight. This was a foreign world, and I still couldn’t quite wrap my head around how I had managed to land myself in this position. Sure, I had known Lou and Sam for quite some time, but everything about Lou’s job was always so separate from our friendship. Besides stories she occasionally told about funny antics backstage, or the occasional photo shared from her in a far away country, we never talked about One Direction. They were all just stories about things that happened to a friend of a friend to me. They were real people, but they just weren’t real to me. Now I was seated next to one of them for the next 8 hours.

I felt a bit like an imposter. Like, I should have been richer, or more talented, or even a bigger fan of the band in order for me to be allowed to be here. I had seen them perform once, on my birthday, and had enjoyed whenever I heard one of their songs come on the radio, but I had hardly classified myself as a fan.

Continuing to scroll through the selection of available in-flight movies, I paused for a moment when a familiar face appeared on the screen. One Direction not only had a movie out, but apparently it was available for me to watch. The movie poster on my screen featured a large image of Harry and the rest of the boys, his hair much shorter than the untamed curls he currently had which told me this movie must have been a few years old. I contemplated selecting it, if only to provide me a little bit of background knowledge about this band I was now fully employed by, but how weird would it be if Harry woke up to find me literally watching a movie about him.

“Don’t waste your time watching that film. Heard they’re just a bunch of talentless wankers. Can’t even sing.”

Too late.

I could feel my face burning up and surely turning every shade of red known to mankind in the colour wheel as Harry’s low chuckle of a laugh met my ears. I was far too scared to look over at him, so I just turned off the television screen and fixed my gaze on my hands that were now neatly folded together in my lap.

“Sorry, that’s probably weird for you.” I mumbled, picking at a chip in the nail polish on one of my fingernails. Desperate to look anywhere but at Harry, the state of my manicure had never been more interesting to me as I studied it intensely. “Just thought about it for a second to see if it would give me a bit of a preview of what tour life is all about.”

I could see Harry stretching out of the corner of my eye, still refusing to fully look over at him out of embarrassment. His headphones now resting loosely around his neck I heard him try and muffle a yawn with his hand before speaking up. “Nah, don’t worry about it. I’m just teasing you.”

I nodded my head to signal I had heard what he said.

“You seem nervous.” He observed. I could literally feel his stare burning into the side of my face as I mentally cursed Lou for placing me in this position a million times over.

I shrugged my shoulders, desperate to try and give off any sort of vibe other than the desperate and distressed persona I always seemed to be embodying whenever I had been around Harry. “Guess I just don’t know what to expect.” My admission was honest and he seemed to acknowledge this as he nodded his head along with me.

“It’s going to be a great time, I promise.” This was far from the first time I had heard these words from someone in an attempt to was my nerves. It was as if nobody understood that uprooting your entire life was going to make you nervous and a simple comment about how everything would be fine never made me feel even remotely close to fine. Maybe Harry picked up on this as well as he fully removed the headphones from around his neck and tossed them rather carelessly onto of the carryon leather bag that was at his feet under the seat in front of him. “I can understand some nerves, but I hope they’re excited nerves. We’re all a family on these tours and we all look out for one another.”

“Yeah, that’s what Lou kept telling me.”

“Teasdale’s onto something then. We’d never hire or have someone out on tour with us who had anything other than the best intentions. We don’t get much of a chance to see any of our actual families so you become pretty close to everyone you’re out on the road with. You’d be surprised how quickly airplanes start to feel like a home away from home.”

“I hate flying.”

The words were out of my mouth like verbal vomit before I even had a chance to register them. Harry’s laugh was loud and genuine as I looked over at him for the first time since he had awoken from his brief nap, momentarily forgetting about all of my flying and pre-tour nerves as he ran a hand rather roughly through his already disheveled curly hair.

“I guess this whole thing is just a little overwhelming. But in a good way, I guess.” I tried again, an attempt to backtrack and make myself seem a little bit less like a spoiled brat. The key to any sort of success in this industry was being nice and I was doing a pretty shit job of that so far. When choosing stylists and makeup artists for call backs and rebooking teams, lead artists were always more likely to call back the assistants who left positive impressions on them. I just had to break out of my shell and get back to my usual self and I’m sure it’d make this whole experience flow smoothly. This was a once in a lifetime opportunity, and surely the peek of my career, and the last thing I wanted was for anyone to think I was ungrateful or taking this for granted.

“I can imagine.” Harry nodded again, shifting slightly in his seat so he was facing me a bit more. I hesitated for a second before adjusting myself to mirror his position. “So if you’re so nervous about this gig then why’d you take it?”

“Uh-“ My mouth hung open for a second as I tried to form a coherent sentence or two. So much for all of that. Harry already thought I was ungrateful for this. Off to a great start already, Trix.

“That came out a bit rude, didn’t it?” Harry had quite the dimple in his left cheek when he smiled and it was currently all my simple minded brain could focus on as he chuckled lightly. “Genuinely just curious about it.”

I had to look back down at my hands that were still resting in my lap in order to bring myself back down to reality and focus on the question Harry was posing. How would I even begin to explain what had led me to this spot? He claimed he was curious, but I doubt he cared to listen to my sob story about Jacks. I chewed a bit too hard on my bottom lip as I contemplated a response for Harry. I wasn’t going to lie to him, I just didn’t think he really needed to know the whole truth. “I guess I’m just at a crossroads in my personal life, so Lou insisted I take a break from all that and come out with her to help out. She needed the extra set of hands and I needed a brief change of scenery before I went mad.”

It was brief and edited, but it seemed to do the job as Harry was nodding his head rather too enthusiastically as I looked back up at him.

“Yeah, Lou had mentioned you had just broken up with someone.” This kid was straight to the point.

“Of course she did.” I groaned.

“Were you together long?”

“I guess so.” It would be unfair to say Jacks and I were together for 4 years, because that often gave off the impression that we were happily in love for that entire time period. We were just kids and now that I was far enough removed from the whole situation, I could easily recognize that it was far from a fairytale or anything that anyone should be jealous of or even mourn the loss of. It was a thing that happened, and now it was over. That was that.

“I’m sorry to hear that.”

“You really shouldn’t be. It’s all positives now.”

Harry’s dimples were back in full force as he smiled over at me, nodding his head slightly to signal his agreement. “All positives. I like that.” I could practically see Harry making a mental note of my new mantra. I’m sure he’d be tweeting it, or some cryptic variant of my wording, out to his millions of Twitter followers and they’d eat it up. The thought brought me a little bit of satisfaction to know that I would be the source of the 140 character message that was sure to drive all of these fans around the world wild.

I was nervous we were going to be stuck in an uncomfortable silence now as I had no idea how to reply to his comment, nodding my head quietly in response to him. Surely we were now going to sit here for hours in silence as Harry thought about how completely daft I was.

I noticed Harry glancing around the plane, surely a bit uncomfortable as a result of just how poorly I was doing in this social situation. I was never this awkward or anxious around people before, Sam often teasing me that I was the Queen of nonsensical small talk, but everything I could think about saying to Harry just seemed stupid. He was too posh and too important to have to deal with my immature anecdotes.

“This is weird for me.” Harry noted, instantly causing my stomach to churn in embarrassment.

“What is?” I inquired, slightly dreading his answer. He surely couldn’t have meant flying was weird. They were jet setting pop stars, constantly flying around the world. He must have meant sitting next to a total stranger that was verging on creepy fan girl who couldn’t hold a decent conversation. I had almost watched his band’s bloody movie while sitting right next to him. Good fucking job, mate. Now he was completely creeped out and was surely going to request to never have to sit next to the help on a flight ever again.

“I usually just sleep the entire flight, so it’s weird for me to be this awake right now.” Harry laughed. I wondered if he had picked up on my 10 second freak out.

Sam had also mentioned on more than one occasion that I may have also been the Queen of overreacting and jumping to conclusions. That was definitely coming out right now.

I nodded my head, trying to compose myself for what felt like the millionth time in the brief time we had been on this place. “I’ve just never flown before so all of this is weird.”

“What?” His eyes were wide in disbelief at my response.

“Once when I was real young, but it was just a brief trip to Spain.” I shook my head at the terrible memory of the former vacation. “Cried the entire time too.”

“This really is a change for you then.”

“Yeah, a bit.”

Harry chuckled a bit as I focused all of my attention on my hands folded neatly in my lap, suddenly afraid to look up and risk making eye contact. “I guess that explains all the nerves.”

“Yeah, soz I’m always such a mess whenever we meet.”

This is the closest the two of us had come to acknowledging my birthday celebrations in Paris. My panic attack in a crowded club where Harry selflessly came to my rescue was suddenly the elephant in the room. If it hadn’t already, every part of my body language screamed uncomfortable. I suddenly wished I hadn’t refused one of the cheap airline blankets the flight attendant had come around offering right before takeoff, as I instead sat completely exposed to Harry. There was absolutely nothing between us for me to hide behind, but his demeanour stayed soft and welcoming as his impossibly deep dimples made another appearance accompanied by a rather large smile.

“You’re hardly a mess, Trix.” He was laughing a bit, but for some reason his words seemed rather genuine rather than mocking or condescending. “But I can tell you an embarrassing story about one of my first flights with all the boys if that’ll make you feel a bit more comfortable.”

I don’t think I could ever be comfortable around Harry Styles, but I nodded my head in agreement anyways. No one could ever be comfortable around a human being that was this attractive. Or nice. Yeah, it was definitely just his personality not his looks that I was referencing. I couldn’t be focusing on his looks, I had to keep it professional. Even if there wasn’t a single person on Earth that wouldn’t swoon over this boys dark curly locks.

I completely lost my train of thought as I watched him run a hand through said curly locks, shaking them out and flipping all his hair to one side.

“I was just trying to make myself feel a little bit more at home, you know?” He hadn’t even gotten into the story yet and his smile was already the biggest I had ever seen, clearly running through the story in his mind first before speaking. “Probably one of the first long haul flights we ever took and I decided to just take all my clothes off. I think we can all agree it’s the best way to sleep.”

“Not in public, though.”

Harry just shrugged at my response. I couldn’t comprehend how he could always be so cool. Even retelling a story that anyone else would find embarrassing, Harry was calm, cool, and collected. He was always so confident in himself, but in the most effortless way possible.

“Even got up to use the toilet in nothing but the airline blanket.”

I covered my face with my hands to hide my giggles as I heard Harry let out a good laugh next to me. I couldn’t help but blush a bit as I felt my mind begin to wander to the mental image of Harry completely naked on an airplane. But I had to get rid of those thoughts immediately. He was now technically my boss as I was working under contract from One Direction. Not to mention he was also Gemma’s baby brother. There had to be some sort of golden rule about not thinking about one of your closest friends’ siblings naked.

“Everyone on the plane seemed to be asleep. Quickly learned from security that’s still not exactly proper plane etiquette.”

“Noted. Glad I can learn from your mistakes, Harry.”

Harry leaned forward, reaching for his carry on bag that rested at his feet, tucked away neatly under the seat in front of us. “I’m just here to help, Trix.” I watched him unzip the bag and pull out a fluffy blanket from the leather suitcase. It was one of those lush blankets you’d see on someone’s Pinterest board, photographed in some posh home library or draped over the back of an all white sofa that no one actually had in real life.

Of course Harry Styles had one, though.

“Honestly, the best way to make it through all these flights is to just sleep through them. It’ll help the nerves.” He held one half of the blanket out to me as he let the rest drape over his lap. “Try getting some sleep.”

I accepted the blanket, leaning back into my seat to try and get as comfortable as these cramped quarters would allow me to. I mumbled out a small thank you to Harry as he mirrored my position.

“I promise you’ll feel a hundred times better when we land if you get a little nap in at least.”

I nodded my head in agreement as I let my eyes fall shut. The magnitude of how tired I was was now hitting me. This day had been a roller coaster of emotions and my body was calling for a timeout.

“I’m just looking out for you, love.” I heard Harry’s sleepy words whisper just before I drifted off into the first peaceful sleep I had had in weeks.