The Last Line

As much as I hear about people thinking the superhero life is glamorous just makes me want to punch them in the face even more than I already do. There are a few different types of categories of superhero that you can break them into. You have the ultra-powerful like Superman who can walk through a warzone and be fine. Then you have the mid-ranged powers like Flash who can still do some damage, but need to be careful with what situation they run their skinny asses into. Finally you have the ass-kicking non-powers like Batman and I who are currently hiking through a backed up sewer with at least twelve busted pipes so we don’t get shot at by the gang bangers right above us. Yeah, being a hero is sure all about the glamour you unknowing apes.

Anyway, so Dad and I are traveling through a crap-covered sewer to ambush Black Skull’s men who are supplying the local gangs with military grade firepower, and yet another cliché that never seems to get old. Our job was to hit them hard and take their guns before the local gang the Mutants could wreck even more havoc on the streets. It was already stretching the entire “Bat Family” to the breaking point trying to keep them down.

Dad was trudging forwards, his normal scowl adorning his face like it had been carved on. “Alfred, how much farther to the exit over?” he paged Pennyworth.

“Roughly another fifty meters Master Bruce over.” Alfred responded with his stiff English accent. The old man continued to amaze me at how he could keep such a professional composure over years of absolute absurdity. From Dad being hurdled through time to me being impaled by one of Mom’s accelerated clones, long confusing story don’t ask, Pennyworth had been there patching up our cuts and bruises while making sure dinner was on the table exactly when we needed it.

“Copy that Alfred. Over and out.” Dad responded as we trudged towards a ladder.

“Remind me why you needed my help this time around? Losing that spring in your step old man?” I asked flicked some sludge out of my trench coat.

“Thought you would appreciate some father-son bonding time.” My old man told me in one of his ever increasingly rare jokes. I chuckled a little at the suggestion and climbed up the ladder after he did.

“Maybe, but if I would have known that it involved me trudging through a sewer with busted sewage pipes I might have let Grayson or Drake take that honor.” I retorted as the two of us climbed out into the alleyway behind the warehouse where the deal was going down. “If they don’t hear us coming they’ll sure smell us.” I told Dad as I tried to wring some of the excess sewage out of the bottom of my trench coat.

“Can’t always team up solely with Dick, sometimes I need your help as well.” Dad told me as we crept over to the backdoor. After fiddling around with the lock the door swung open with a small click.

“I’m honored.” I said sarcastically as we made our way through the warehouse. I crawled on top of some boxes to get the best vantage point I could while Dad shot his grappling gun and zipped up to the rafters. We waited about ten minutes before Black Skull came out with at least twenty cases of firearms and five heavily armed men. I really wanted to know what was in them but at the same time I didn’t since I wasn’t going to get to play around with any of them. Dad still heavily enforced that “no killing” rule that got bent around me every now and again. I still had a problem of occasionally ramming a sword through a gangbanger’s head. I hadn’t done it in months and I didn’t naturally go to that option immediately anymore. But every now and again the urge gets a little too strong and I slip up.

I watched the gangsters carefully noting every detail of where they were, how they were positioned, what they were carrying. There were five guards in total, two of them were packing Uzi’s and the other three had pump action shotguns. Instead of standing in a circle around Black Skull they were patrolling around the warehouse. Spreading their small numbers thin. Black Skull must have had an army on the outside of the warehouse to be this cocky.

Another five minutes passed and the of the Mutants walked in with five or six Mutants in. I never understood their style. They looked like punk rejects from the 80’s because someone thought that was how we would dress these days. All the brightly colored hair and visor sunglasses only made it easier to pick them out in a crowd, which made my job ten times easier.

The leader was a big hairy guy. Ripped in a way that body builders would be envious of. I see why Dad wanted the support; if he took this guy on by himself there would be trouble.

“Sick nasty boss Skully!” the mutant leader yelled. “I capped so many assholes with the guns you’ve been givin’ us!’

“Yes, with the Bat Family so spread out they’ve been oblivious to my men who can finally carry out the deals I’ve been needing to make. Just keep gunning down innocent civilians and other gang members not related to the my corporation and I’ll keep sending you and your men the guns and ammunition you need to carry out this delicate mission.” Black Skull replied as he tapped the crates and the Mutant goon started to carry the boxes out.

“Yeah boss man we don’t shiv. We don’t shiv at all. I got slicer-dicers for the delicate missions and spuds for when we act all billy.”

“You’ve been good accomplices so far, don’t muck it up.” Black finished as he slowly began to leave the scene. It took everything I had to not launch myself at him. He was the reason that the Mutants had gunned down twenty cops and dozens more innocent people in Gotham while the cops and us had been fighting them nonstop for the last three days. If nothing else it was also because I was starting to get a small cramp from crouching for so long.

“Robin, deploy smoke bombs.” Batman crackled over my radio piece. There was a distinct difference from when Bruce was acting like my dad and when he was Batman. Sometimes he failed to turn one of the other off.

I smiled as I threw three smoke bombs that exploded and filled the room with a dense smoke. I clicked on my thermal vision on. The room filled full of heat readings so I knew exactly where these bastards were.

I launched myself forward and tackled the nearest gang member I saw. It was a Mutant; I could smell the B.O and hair spray dripping off of him. We both hit the ground hard, his skull crashed hard into the concrete floor and it gave him a concussion that would probably land him in the hospital for the new few months. I looked up to see a member of Black Skull’s gang shooting his gun wildly, his morale broken already.

I rolled forward and punched the man square in his gut. He keeled over allowing me to quickly finish him off with a knee to the face. Even if he wasn’t knocked out he probably would rather stay on the floor for a bit longer to avoid another punch. I turned my head to see Batman taking on four or five goons with little difficulty.

There was a roar right in front of me. I grimaced as I turned my head around to see the mutant leader with some sort of goggles on, and they were probably thermal as he was swinging a rather large metal pipe right at me. The pipe hit me hard in the head. It didn’t hurt as much as it should since my cowl/helmet was made from reinforced steel. It would be like a football player with a helmet on getting hit with a large stick. The most it would do would probably turn their head and make them wince for a second or two.

Right now I was wondering two things. First, when did I get so sloppy that I was letting random thugs get the jump on me? Second, where the hell did this guy get thermal goggles all of a sudden?

“We don’t shiv! I’ll suck the marrow from your bones when I’m done with you little bat!” the Leader roared at me unconvincingly.

“That’s what you think.” I whispered as I rolled and dodged a second swing from the large metal pipe. I knew that I couldn’t take this guy alone using non-lethal force. That didn’t mean I couldn’t hold my own ground until I could get some help. First thing I needed to do was take those goggles out of commission. Luckily dad always made sure that we went out as fully stocked as possible.

I grabbed an EMP charge from my belt. After I primed the device I threw it with pinpoint accuracy onto the goggles. The charge detonated and the Mutant screamed as he went blind from the heavy smoke still in the air. I would have to find out where Dad got those smoke bombs.

I rolled back and rose to my feet. Grabbing a few batarangs from my belt I hurled them at the leader. They sliced into the leaders chest and embedded themselves deeply into him. Blood started to pour from the wounds but all the bastard did was let out a blood roar and start to swipe at me wildly.

“You’re nothing but a wild animal,” I taunted him as I kicked him hard in the stomach causing him to double over. “You’re nothing without your big guns and fancy toys.” I gave him a quick punch to the face. He swung a fist as big as my chest at me. I rolled to the side and gave his kneecap a quick kick. He kneeled over in pain. I stood up and sneered at him. “You think you’re building an empire? You’re nothing but scum rotting in this city’s gutters.” I launched another punch at him when I suddenly stopped moving.

I looked down to see that he had one huge fist wrapped around my chest, and it was not like I was a real skinny guy. I’m pretty sure when I looked back up I had the biggest “oh crap” look on my face. That was beside the point as he picked me up and started to smash me around like a toddler with a cheap Barbie doll.

After slamming me into the ground six or eight times his arm started to get tired. That’s when he tried to palm me off into the other arm. I went to my belt and pulled out my caltrops. This was going to hurt me but it would hurt him a whole lot more. I sprinkled as many of my spiked caltrops on me as I could before he closed his hand around me. He howled in pain as the caltrops dug into the exposed flesh of his palm. I grimaced as some of them dug into my not as armored parts.

His grip on me loosened on me allowing for me to wiggle out onto the ground. I was in a mild amount of pain considering a man with the size and strength of a gorilla smashed me onto a concrete floor over half a dozen times. I hadn’t started coughing up blood like everyone usually seems to after getting punched a few times. During this time I realized something very important. The smoke had dissipated and everyone could see me. I looked behind me to see that the mutant leader was already up and his fist was flying towards me. I managed to roll over to the side right before his fist came down and pulverized my back.

I don’t know why I thought I could take this guy head on for a moment. For the last half of this fight my ass was getting handed to him on a silver and diamond platter. How many other goons were there that it was taking Dad this long to get over here and help me out with this creep? I managed to push myself back onto my feet before I got gut punched by the leader. I about threw up the dinner Alfred had given me before I went out on patrol. The leader punched me and threw me forward into a bunch of wooden crates, which splintered and broke from my body mass.

I pressed the comm unit on my cowl. “Need, help.” I rasped out short of breath from getting the wind knocked out of me. I would have given my left eye to have my katana blades on me right now. Then this guy would be sliced up in tiny little pieces.

The leader came charging at me like a mad dog. I was trying to get back up but the intense beating I had just taken had me incapacitated for the moment. My mind raced trying to think of a way out of this but was coming up short. “Damn it,” I muttered under my breath as I tried to steel my body for impact.

Suddenly someone grabbed the collar of my trench coat and yanked me out of there. “What the hell?” I asked out loud before looking up to see a friendly yet cocky grin spread across his face.

“Damn it Gray-I mean Nightwing! I had that under control!” I yelled at him despite the fact that I was secretly grateful for the help.

“Sure you did. That whole help me thing was just a ruse wasn’t it?” Dick asked as we both dropped to the floor. “Bruce go after Black Skull. The boys and I have this handled.” Dick told Dad as the two of us got into our fighting stance.

“On it.” Dad replied as I turned to see his cape disappearing out a doorway.

“Wait, there’s more?” I asked.

“Wait for it…”

Through the skylight I saw someone wearing a shiny red helmet guns blazing come crashing through dramatically. Two or three goons dropped to the ground whimpering in pain after he landed with a flourish.

“You’re right Dick, rubber bullets are so much more fun in the end.” the man chuckled.

“You invited Todd?” I groaned as Jason walked over to join our little lineup.

“So that muscled brute over there is the one you’re having trouble with? Don’t worry little brother; even Dick couldn’t take on the first seven-foot roided out bag guy he was put up against.” Jason joked as he reloaded his pistols.

“You know that’s an unfair comparison. Criminals those days were always doped up on some sort of mutant growth hormone and/or falling into a vat of radioactive waste and not dying on contact.” Dick said with a smirk.

“So is this it or is someone else going to come crashing through the door with a dramatic flair or can we finally take on the confused looking Gorilla standing ten feet in front of us?” I asked with a dry tone.

“Wait for it…” Dick told me.

As I predicted a flash of red burst through, not walked through burst through, the door sending splinters showing everywhere.

“Tell me I haven’t missed anything yet.” Tim asked.

“Is everyone here now? I think we have bigger and better things to do than give everyone their own openings to a fight!” I screamed annoyed at the other ex-Robins.

“Calm down little bro,” Dick told me as he launched one of his escrima sticks at the mutant leader. “Just enjoy the rare team ups we have.”

Shaking my head I watched as Jason unloaded a clip of rubber bullets into the leader’s chest. They seemed to bounce off of him and started flying at me. I cartwheeled out of the way curious as to why his bullets were bouncing like that. They had started to make rubber bullets out of plastic to combat that small problem.

“Todd! What the hell!” I yelled as I started to flank the mutant leader while Tim lashed out and gave him a kick at the base of his spine.

“I like rubber better than plastic.” Jason said with a chuckle.

I ran towards the leader. The other three had slowly been giving him a beat down and he was starting to get sloppy and tired. One last punch would probably tip him over the edge and make him fall. “Nightwing give me a boost!” I yelled as I jumped in the air. My feet were landing near Dick who pushed the bottom of them and shot me towards the leader. Reeling my fist back I launched my fist towards the leader’s face. My fist collided with his face like a shotgun shell against a clay pigeon.

The leader started to drop as his teeth came flying out of his mouth. I dropped with him onto the floor. Unlike him I managed to push myself onto my feet. While I straightened out my coat I looked at the other three members of the Bat-Family.

“Good job, I guess.” I told them as I heard the police sirens pull up outside the warehouse. There was one question that had been bugging me since the other three showed up. “So weren’t the mutants going on a massive shooting rampage that’s lasted the whole week?”

“Yeah, they kinda can’t shoot and kill anyone when they ran out bullets. This shipment was going to keep them going for the next week.” Dick told me as he went to pick up his escrima stick that he had thrown.

“Great. I’m glad this whole fiasco is over now.” I told them.

“Damian,” Oracle cut in. After a year or two of being Batgirl Barbra took on a pupil so she could be our eyes and ears as oracle. She still occasionally made an appearance but mostly she sat in her command center and gave us directions.

“Yes?” I asked.

“Robbery at Bill and Finger Street. Get over ASAP.”

I sighed and looked at my brothers, something I was still getting used to calling them. “Duty calls.” I said in my growling voice before heading out. My bike was parked about a block away. I could get there in about two minutes if I really hustled.

“I heard Oracle. Make sure you get your homework done for school tomorrow. Don’t think I didn’t know about that paper due on Thursday.” Dad crackled over the comm unit.

The other three snickered at that little message. I stormed out before they could get started on me. I headed to my bike where ten or twelve random car jackers lie passed out in the alleyway around my bike. If anyone not in the immediate Bat-Family tried to touch it would shock them into unconsciousness. I chuckled as I got onto my bike and fired up the engine. After revving it a few times I shot forward through the streets of Gotham.

There was a freedom to riding the bike versus riding shotgun in the Batmobile. Very few people ever got to drive that and one time that it was in someone else’s hands Dad was dead, again long story. I remember the one time I drove the Batmobile. I had joyrided it once to save his life, mostly just to drive it around, and Dad never let me live that one down. If he could tell my potential girlfriends I am pretty sure he would.

I weaved in and out of traffic. Gotham traffic was always terrible no matter what time of day or night it was. After nearly getting run over by an asshole in an SUV I managed to turn onto Bill and Finger street to see a shadowy figure clambering up the side of a building. I slid my bike into a nearby alleyway and pulled my grapple gun off of my belt and shot it up the side of the building. It quickly pulled me up and I clambered onto the roof.

I managed to pull myself over the side of the roof to see a slender figure in black leather hopping over the various pipes and vents on the top of the building.

“-tt-, I hate rooftop chases.” I muttered to myself as I started to sprint after her.

I pulled out my grapple gun and raised it. Not only was it extremely good for getting up on top of roofs but also I could maim and capture common street criminals with ease.

I was about to pull the trigger when a small voice in the back of my head whispered, you promised. I looked at the grapple gun and then back up at the target. If I used this thing it would make my life ten times easier, however Dad had told me that if he caught me using excessive force then I was done patrolling for a whole month. I put the grapple gun back on my belt and pulled out a handful of Batarangs instead. I chucked them hard and they landed at the criminal’s feet. Causing them to stumble and fall over.

Before they could get up I was already on top of them. My fist was raised back to deliver a mighty punch. “Should of stayed home.” I told them as I launched my fist at their face. At least that’s what I was telling myself as what felt like three tiny daggers racked across the only exposed area on my face causing me to pull back. I could feel blood already trickling down my face.

The criminal kneed me in the stomach and shoved me off. I grunted as I slumped off to the side for a moment.

“Is that all the playtime I get from the mighty Batboy?” the criminal said in a feminine voice.

I looked up to see it was indeed female. She was slender and wore a black leather jacket with some sort of skintight leggings, sacrificing armor for mobility. On her head and face was a black hood with two little cat ears on them and a domino mask that covered everything except for her mouth. I groaned as I stood up. Not another Catwoman copycat, no pun intended. Ever since Selina dropped the whole façade a few years back and became my “stepmom” dozens of other Catwomans had started popping up in droves.

“What’s that little bat? Can’t deal with a little pussycat?” she purred and rhymed with a smile. I winced a little at that rhyme I already got enough of those helping Dad out with Riddler.

“You’ll be in Arkham before the night is over.” I growled at her. I was prepared to lunge at her when suddenly smoke came shooting up from the ground. I could hear her footsteps running away from me. Barging through the smoke I saw her, as she was about to jump to the next rooftop.

I shifted into another gear and tried to run as fast as I could. I sped up and up until I was right on her heels. Right before she jumped I managed to grab her ankle at the last minute and drag her back towards me. I had a hard time maintaining my grip on her. It was like trying to grip a greased pole with two fingers. She started to trash around like a wild animal. I also don’t think she realized that the only thing preventing her from becoming a pancake from a twelve foot drop was the hold I had on her right leg.

“Stop. Moving.” I enunciated while trying to hold on.

“Let me go!” she screamed back at me.

“I don’t want to drop you. Stop fighting me.”

“No!” she gave a last scream and struck out at me. Her stiletto heel covered foot shot out at me in a last ditch attempt. I had to quickly reach up and grab her ankle with my other hand so that she didn’t impale me on her heel.

I tried to hold onto her until I couldn’t and she slipped out of my grasp. I tried to grab at her but she still ended up falling. I watched with mild disappointment in that I couldn’t save her life or at least that’s what I thought.

What happened shouldn’t have amazed me all that much but it was still slightly impressive. The Catwoman imposter grabbed the whip which had been coiled around her waist like a belt, snapped it at the nearby fire exit stairs, wrapped the whip around it and swung herself into a random person’s window.

Even though at this point it was becoming a hassle I jumped on top of the nearby fire escape and ran down to the window that she had crashed through. I passed through a living room of an understandably confused family. By the time I had vaulted over their coffee table and gotten out into the hall the imposter had gotten away.

“Damn it!” I growled as I went back into the family room and excused myself out the window. One of the inhabitants was trying to sue me but I didn’t pay him any attention. We got a lawsuit from someone trying to make a quick buck nearly every week, and every week they received a surprise check from Wayne Enterprises paying for the damages.

I decided it was time to call it a night. I obviously was having an off night after being bashed around by the Mutant Leader and letting some Catwoman wannabe escape me. I went back on top of the roof and ran back to the alleyway that I had parked my bike. I scaled down the wall and jumped on my bike. I pulled the bike out and headed home.

There is a complicated way home, which I will not mention here, that the entire Bat Family has to take to get back to the Bat-Cave. If I just drove up to Wayne Manor it would only take me about ten minutes. This other way was full of twists and turns that would shake off any tails pretty quickly.

After driving for about twenty to thirty minutes I finally came to the secret Bat-Cave entrance. A giant wall slid open allowing me to pull in and park my bike. I slid off of it and pulled my cowl off. My black hair sweaty and matted to my temple as cool air blew over my face.

“Welcome back Master Damian. I trust patrolling went well.” Alfred said as he stepped out of the shadows. Alfred was some sort ninja butler in his spare time. Where Dad and the rest of us just blended into the shadows Alfred blended into the house and every other surrounding.

“Patrolling has gone better Alfred. I told him as I hit my locked and began to hang up my gear.

“Pardon me for a moment sir but you seem to be injured. Please accompany me to the medic center so I may patch you up.” Alfred instructed. I started to pay more attention to Alfred’s instructions after I watched him single handedly take on at least thirty of Joker’s henchman and emerge without a scratch with tea and sandwiches intact as well.

I sat in the sterile medic room while Alfred prepped the medical supplies. After a few moments he came over and began to treat the scratches and bruises that had appeared on my body tonight from the pounding I took.

“So Master Damian may I postulate that you will be courting the young lady you encountered not an hour ago?” Alfred said in his normal even tone that I could never tell if he was joking or not.

“No Alfred. I’d rather saw my arm off a kite string.” I told him as he cleaned the wound on my face with hydrogen peroxide.

“I assumed when you told me when you were eleven that you were going to follow in your father’s footsteps and you meant all aspects I thought you would follow your father’s tendencies to form a romantic entanglement with various bad girls.”

“I’ll pass. Are we done here?” I asked as he was finishing bandaging me up.

“Indeed we are. Go rest now. You have school in the morning.”

“Night Alfred.” I told him as I headed towards the steps to the manor.

After I climbed the steps and passed through the clock that hid the Bat-Cave I stepped out into the living room where Dick was laying on the couch.

“Don’t you have patrolling to do little bro?” Dick teased me.

“Don’t you have some harlot you should be chasing?” I snarked back.

“Hey come on little bro. Maybe one of these days you’ll find the right woman for you, or man.”

“I’m going to bed now.” I told him dryly as I started to ascend the stairs.

“You can only from the truth for so long!” he yelled after me as I turned down the hallway to my room.

I counted the doors until I hit the third door on the right. I opened the door and stepped through, immediately closing it behind me. On the bed was Titus my loyal Great Dane who started to wag his tail as I walked over to the bed and fell over. Now that I wasn’t moving my body ached. I could wait to brush my teeth tomorrow and Titus was giving me a bath one giant tongue lick at a time. It was disgusting.

“Night boy.” I told him with a quick pat as I closed my eyes to finally fall asleep. Letting the darkness overtake me and pull me under to the gentle currents of sleep.