Remember Me

I stumbled through an endless hallway. Calling out a name, over and over. Tears streamed down my face and my feet ached. Behind me, a crimson fire followed down the hall, chasing me faster and faster. Terrified, I just kept running.

“Wendy…!” a breathless, desperate voice called out from my right. A door appeared, tearing open and a body falling through it. My feet stopped in their tracks as my eyes landed on him; his cheeks burning red and skin covered in char, eyes smoky and scared and brave and hurt all at the same time. His arms swept around me, the heavy bunker pants and coat he wore protecting us both from the flames somehow. I whispered his name, grateful and burying my head in his chest. “Come on, let’s run!” He grabbed my hand in his gloved one and tugged me with him, the two of us running down the hall as fast as we could.

“I don’t think we’re gonna make it,” I whimpered, squeezing his hand and looking over my shoulder as we ran. The flames were gaining on us, and we had what felt like miles to go.

“No, no… We can do this,” he promised. We tripped.

Laying there, I looked into those eyes, tears full of fear running from my own, our arms wrapping around each other. He smiled sadly and held me close, staring down at me as the flames reached us, starting with my leg. But instead of a promise of our love, or a confession, or a terrified wish that we would survive, his words were sweet, surprised, and simple.

“You heard me...” he whispered. And we were enveloped in flame.

Gasping, my eyes snapped open and I sat up in bed, a cry leaving my lips in pain. My leg was burning, my eyes squeezing shut and then open again. I didn’t want to see it again. I didn’t want to face it. Barely a second passed before Helen was fast-walking into the room I shared with Bill, an elderly man with a kind heart and failing memory. Though our lives were so different, our memories made us the same. “What is it, Wendy?” she asked softly. Sometimes Helen could show her nice side. It was always refreshing when she did.

Sniffling in shame, I turned my head and closed my eyes. “I… Nightmare. And it’s hurting again.” I couldn’t say anything beyond that. She seemed to understand, stepping forward in the dimly lit room. The nighttime lighting in the hospital always staggered between creepy and soothing. She checked over my vitals and patted my hand, managing a small smile and turning to my lower half.

“Are you okay, honey?” she questioned, reaching forward. I nodded and looked away. She lifted the covers and felt around what was there. I closed my eyes in pain as she changed the dressing. Hate filled my gut and I wanted to disappear again. “You know, hiding from it won’t solve anything.” Her slight Scottish accent filtered through and I frowned more heavily at her words.

“I… I can’t.” I forced back tears.

“Just try, Wendy.” She placed a hand on my shoulder. I gritted my teeth. She wouldn’t let this go. Taking in a deep breath, I turned to face it.

The stump.

The fire had taken away more than my memory, if you could believe it. As if that wasn’t enough. My fight against the tears was a losing battle, the sight of my right leg being so little, so much less. It was gone. Just… gone. A whimper was the last sound I made before sobs began, and Helen handled it calmly, gently wrapping me in a hug as I cried. How could I go home like this? My entire life, not knowing who I am and never walking again. At least not the way I should. I was damaged merchandise. How could I ever put the pieces back together again?

I didn’t even know what the pieces were.

“You’re going to be okay,” Helen said strongly, pulling away from me and holding me away from her by my shoulders. My head hung, tears soaking my cheeks and my breathing ragged.

“O-Okay,” I whispered, nodding and trying to calm myself down. “Can… C-Can I take a walk?” A smile crossed her face and she nodded.

“Of course, Wendy. Let me get your crutches.” I smiled weakly, waiting as she grabbed them and stood them up for me. With her help, I swung my left leg and what was left of my right over the edge of the bed, trying not to look down at them and focusing on my arm strength as I lifted myself onto the crutches. I was tired, but something in me just needed to walk.

“So…” she asked as we made our way out of the room. I focused on the pace and rhythm of walking with the crutches. “What was this nightmare about?” I swallowed quietly and sighed, trying to recall it.

“Well, uhm… it was a little different than the other ones. It was still him, but this time we were running down a hallway. It was going on forever, and there was a fire coming up behind us,” I told her quietly as we went along. She nodded.

“Sounds scary,” she commented. I chuckled a little, nodding my head.

“It really was… But something good did happen with this one,” I murmured. She looked at me expectantly as I stopped in the hallway, taking a breather.

“Go on,” she said.

“I heard his voice for the first time.” I couldn’t help the small grin that snuck its way onto my lips. “Every dream, it was muffled, or silent, his mouth would be moving but I would hear nothing.” We started to walk again. “But this time, I heard his voice so clearly, it was… Beautiful. There was this… rough edge to it, but it was melodic. I think it was the most incredible voice I’ve ever heard.” She laughed quietly, patting my back gently.

“Sounds romantic,” was all she had to say on the matter. I smiled a little wider and agreed in as quiet a voice as I could manage; I didn’t want to wake other patients.

As I lifted my head from focusing on the floor, my eyes caught something strange - something unusual. A visitor, sitting in a patient’s room just ahead; a few doors before we’d be back around to my room. How could a visitor be allowed in so late at night? His jacket was a dark, navy blue, and on the left shoulder, a patch. A red patch.

I gasped softly.

A firefighter. “Helen..!” I whispered, “Think that could be one of the men who was at the fire?” I stared at him, he leaned forward with his hands clasped together in front of his head, resting against the metal sides of the bed. She immediately shook her head. “Can I meet him, do you think he’d mind?”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” she protested, trying to tug at the shoulder of my gown.

“Why not? I just want to thank him for his service, whether or not he works at the station that responded to the fire. Just… really quick, I promise.” She slumped her shoulders in defeat at the last of my whispers, shuffling after me as I crutched my way into the patient’s room. I didn’t look at the patient, just the firefighter beside him. “Uhm, excuse me,” I murmured. His head lifted and his eyes met mine. They widened in shock. It must’ve been my leg. I tried not to frown at the reaction, clearing my throat. “I’m Wendy, and I uhm… Well, I recently was in a fire, I uhm… I was rescued by firefighters from Station 51, I… I don’t know, I just wanted to thank you for your service.”

He seemed to be searching for the words to say. He was kind-looking, his eyes were a bright, icy blue, and his lips parted as if I’d completely shocked him. “I’m sorry,” I blurted, “I didn’t mean to put you on the spot.”

“No, no, you’re fine, I just… Uhm…” He turned from me, looking at the man he was there to see. I followed his gaze, and furrowed my brows in confusion at the sight of who lay there. He was… familiar. So familiar.

And then it clicked. “Oh my god…!” I exclaimed, immediately stumbling out of my crutches and scrambling along the side of his bed to get closer to him. “Oh my god, Helen!” I looked up at her, and the expression on her face was that of a deer in headlights.

“You remember him?!” the firefighter visiting suddenly stood from his chair, his mouth in a wide smile and face full of surprise. In complete shock, I nodded my head and stared at the man laying there.

“Oh my god, do you really?” Helen questioned, “I have to call the doctor!”

“Helen, it’s him! The man from my dreams!” A tear of joy rolled from the corner of my eye, and I pressed one hand to my mouth, the other holding me up against the bed. They both went quiet.

“...Oh,” Helen sighed, leaning into the edge of the bed. I furrowed my brows and shook my head.

“Helen, I can’t believe this. This is impossible, how can this be real?” I looked up at her, so happy and in utter disbelief. She seemed so disappointed. “I’m sorry, I know it sounds crazy, but I’m telling you… This is him.” I turned back to him. I remembered everything, the scruff on his cheeks, and the soft lines of his skin; it was him. He was even more beautiful here than he’d been in my dreams. I knew deep down that this couldn’t be real, but… Somehow, it was.

“Wait…” the man questioned quietly, “From your dreams?” I glanced up at him and smiled softly.

“Yes. I’ve… I’ve been having these vivid dreams for weeks, and in every single one… He was there. Oh god…” I shook my head, smiling. The man walked around the bed, sliding a chair to where I leaned against the bed and helping me sit into it. I thanked him, my eyes glued to my handsome firefighter.

“Can you… Can you tell me about him? What’s his name?” I said softly, smiling widely and forcing myself not to reach out and take his hand. By now, he seemed so familiar to me. But I had to remind myself he wasn’t really mine.

“Oh, uhm…” he paused, and Helen whispered something to him. I looked at them both, and tilted my head curiously to the side.

“What is it?” I asked. I adjusted myself in the seat, trying to be comfortable.

“His name is Kelly,” he informed me, pursing his lips and rubbing a hand over his face. Helen walked over to me and gathered my fallen crutches, holding them in one arm.

“Why is he here? Is he alright?” I reached out, not mindful of what I was doing, softly setting a hand onto his arm. The firefighter sat back down into his chair, and stared at Kelly, his eyes full of a sad recollection of events.

“Well, he uhm… He was in a bad fire, just like you. But, he uhm… He’s been in a coma for 26 days.” Immediately, a frown fell over my face, and my heart sunk. I turned to Kelly and gingerly took my hand back.

“Maybe it’s time we head back, Wendy. It’s been a lot of excitement for you,” Helen patted my back. I shook my head. I didn’t want to go.

“What was your name? I’m sorry, I should’ve asked sooner,” I said to the visitor, trying to smile as I glanced up at him.

“Matt,” he told me. “My name’s Matt.” I nodded slowly and sighed, carefully standing back up onto my feet… my foot, and pulling the crutches thankfully from Helen. “You’re welcome to visit him any time, Wendy,” Matt spoke softly, “I’m sure he’d love to have another visitor.” He paused. “Especially you.”

At this, my brows knitted together. Biting my lip, I slowly reached out and shook his hand. “Thank you, Matt. I appreciate it.” Setting my hand back to my crutches, I turned, Helen walking with me back to the room I’d called home for almost a month now.

His words stuck with me. Especially you.