Remember Me

The room was dark, and three candles burned brightly beside me. I sat cross-legged on the hard wooden floor, but couldn’t see the walls or ceiling around us. All I could see was the face of the man in front of me; a charming smile curling up at one corner of his lips as our hands connected between us. “You’re beautiful…” he whispered. I blushed heavily, ducking my face and biting down onto my lip.

“I’ve missed you,” I replied through a slow sigh. The soft grip he had on my hands tightened, and he inched himself closer to me. Leaning forward, he brushed his lips against mine and closed his eyes. I followed suit, my heart beating a little faster.

“You don’t have to miss me anymore, you know,” he mumbled against my lips. I swallowed nervously and smiled ever so slightly.

“Oh yeah? What’s the trick…?” He closed the small gap between us, pressing a long and sweet kiss to my lips. My heart fluttered as I fell deeper into the kiss, one of my hands leaving his and moving up to cup the side of his neck. He smiled and gently pulled back, pecking the tip of my nose.

“No tricks, Wendy,” he breathed out softly over my lips, our eyes still closed, and I could feel warmth emanating from him as his hands moved to rub soothingly up and down my arms. “I promise. You only have to do one thing.” I slowly opened my eyes and took in every inch of his features, grinning happily and curiously to myself.

“And what is this one thing?” I reached up, slowly running my hand through his short curls and soaking in the feel of each strand. That handsome crooked grin tugged on his lips again, and butterflies filled my stomach.

“You just have to open your eyes, Wen… I’m right in front of you. But for some reason… You can’t see me.” A desperation filled his tone, and I pulled my fingers from his hair, furrowing my brows and shaking my head.

“I don’t understand, Kelly… What do you mean?” Carefully, he reached for my left hand, lifting it up between us and pressing a soft kiss to the back of it.

“Look down, Wendy. Open your eyes.” I glanced to my hand, where his two thumbs caressed my skin, each moving to that pesky tan line on my ring finger. And something in my heart sunk for just a second. I stared at the line, then back up at him. His eyes begged me to see it, but I was blind.

Soft voices began to wake me from my slumber. A part of me fought to stay in the dream, but my own curiosity and the irritatingly bright lights of the hospital wouldn’t have it. “She’s been visiting him every day…” one of the voices, fairly familiar, mumbled quietly. I furrowed my brows, my joints twitching awake and eyes slowly peeling open. Several blurry figures stood around me, and I cleared my throat, reaching up to rub at my eyes. As I pulled my fists away, they all came into focus, and I quickly sit up, trying to orient myself.

“Wendy? How’re you feeling?” Helen questioned, seeming uncertain. I glanced around and my eyes landed on Kelly beside me, and immediately a smile took the place of the confused expression on my face. I was in his room, laying uncomfortably in a plastic chair beside his bed. Crowded in the small half-a-room were five or six men dressed in the same dark blue jacket that I’d recognized Matt in five nights ago, with that unmistakable red patch on the shoulder. I managed a small, slightly flustered smile up at all of them, joined only by Helen and my mother.

“Sorry to wake you, honey, I just had been wondering where you were. I was uhm…” my mom paused, glancing around the men in the room. One of them nodded to her. I raised a brow, still trying to wake myself. “I was hoping you and I could talk, Wendy.” I nodded a bit and reached for my crutches.

“Yeah, of course. I’m sorry to intrude on your visiting time, guys,” I said to the rest of them, carefully standing myself up. They all assured me in quiet murmurs that I was ‘all good’, each of them seeming more awkward around me than the next. My leg makes people so uncomfortable around me… I thought to myself, trying not to let the insecurity show through. I followed my mother out of Kelly’s room, stopping in the doorway to glance once more over my shoulder back at him. I’d made it a sort of ritual. Seeing his face as I was leaving always gave me the same butterflies I felt in my dreams.

Lately, there’d been a lot less fire, and a lot more time with Kelly. I’d found myself eager to fall asleep at night. A large part of me wished I could be in the dreams all the time. Because when I was in the dream, I could wiggle all ten of my toes… And when I woke up, Kelly was gone and I’d look down and remember the one thing I wanted to forget.

Helen took my crutches from me as I neared the side of my bed, and I went to sit down, swaying and promptly slipping on the linoleum, my balance still off. My mother’s arms shot out and caught me, and I struggled to right myself. Burning bright red with embarrassment, I hid my face and pushed her away, sitting down on the side of my bed. “I can do it. I’m fine!” I mumbled under my breath, scooting into the right spot on the bed and laying back against the pillows. A couple of hot tears pushed their way through, despite my efforts to remain calm. I turned away from both her and Helen, closing my eyes. “I’m fine.”

“Right, I… I’m sorry,” she said softly, moving around the bed to sit down. My chest sunk at the expression on her face, and I was reminded of how badly I wished I could be asleep again. “I uhm… Wendy, what I have to tell you is really important.” I sighed slowly and reached up, quickly wiping away the wetness under my eyes. Helen stood protectively by my mother and I stared at them in curious confusion.

“I’m listening…” I whispered, clearing my throat and trying to smile at them both.

“I want you to hear me out, and understand that… that Dr. Coleman felt very strongly that this was necessary for your recovery,” she said slowly. I sat up a little straighter.

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“I… See, when… When you woke up from the coma, you were so… disoriented. And the doctor said your memory was going to be an extremely delicate matter. That trying to help you remember things would be difficult, and that we had to be careful not to unload everything on you all at once.” I slowly nodded, trying to follow.

“This is a very common practice in cases of amnesia, Wendy,” Helen added, “However, in this particular case, there were a few factors that resulted in an extended period of this familiarization process your mother is talking about.” I shook my head.

“I don’t understand, what haven’t I been told?” They glanced at each other.

“Dr. Coleman wanted to be here today to help us explain this, honey, but he’s still in Oregon. So he instructed us to-”

“-Please just tell me.” I couldn’t help the interruption; my heart was racing and my nerves were trembling.

“You were not the only victim of the fire, Wendy,” Helen sighed. “There was someone else trapped in there with you. In fact, he is the only reason you two survived.”

“Who is ‘he’? Who was there with me?” I demanded, pushing hair back off of my forehead. I felt clammy, my stomach nervous.

“Your husband, Wendy…” my mother murmured, “You two were in the restaurant, and… everything else we told you was true, there was an arsonist, but… We never explained why this happened.” Tears immediately came to my eyes.

“You’re lying!” I shouted, shaking my head, “That doesn’t make any sense! How could I be married?! If I had a husband, he’d… he’d be visiting me, I would know what he looked like, if anything any of you ever told me was true, I’d know who he was, and I’d know who YOU are, I’d know who I am!” I reached down, shoving the covers back. “If anything was true, if I know who I was, I wouldn’t be so scared to face people with THIS!” I wrapped my fingers around either side of my thigh, the tears coming faster.

“He can’t come visit you, Wendy!” the woman in the coat yelled, standing from her chair, “He’s been in a coma! That’s why we couldn’t tell you! Because this would happen!” I was too busy to see that she was crying, too.

“Leave! Please, just go!” I turned onto my side, burying my face into my pillows and letting it out. I heard her frantic voice and Helen’s flustered one, feet clicking against the floor, and then the door closing. And I laid there in tears, alone in the almost silent hospital room with the empty bed where Bill was laying just two days ago, unable to face my leg, my mind, or the lies that they’d been feeding me since Day 1.

I felt utterly alone; and even the dreams couldn’t comfort me now.