The Leather Jacket

Jack stood in front of Alex, having jumped away from him but the words hung in the air. Everything felt frozen like the whole world had stopped the moment Alex spoke those three words.
“Jack....”
Alex was first to break the silence though the air around them still felt as heavy as concrete
“What.... What did you say to me?” Jack asked his voice shook.
“I said I lo....”
“No... No... No.... No you did not say that” Jack turned away from Alex and pulled at his already messed up hair.
“Jack I...”
“How could you? How could you say that?” Jack demanded.
The look on Jack’s face just broke Alex’s heart, he looked so angry and sad. Alex might as well have told him his mum had died, he couldn’t have looked any worse.
“Jack I didn’t mean....”
“You didn’t mean to? Then exactly what did you mean Alex?”
“I did mean it, I do love you I just....didn’t mean to tell you like that.”
“I can’t do this, my mum’s nearly dead Alex and I just... I just can’t do this”
“I’m sorry I....”
“Stop, just get out Alex. I can’t do it”
“Jack...” Alex fumbled over his words, he didn’t know what to say. He wanted nothing more to go back and never say anything because he couldn’t bare the idea of leaving the hospital doors with Jack still inside.
“Get out!” Jack yelled as loud as he could, his voice cracking as tears appeared in the corner of his already red rimmed eyes.
Alex didn’t say anything he just got up and opened the door. He gave Jack one last look over his shoulder before leaving the room and letting the door shut behind him. Jack watched Alex walk away through the window before sinking down in the chair closest to his mother and breaking down.

Jack was crying so much he almost didn’t hear it, the beeping noise coming from the machine by his mother’s side. Wiping his eyes on his already damp sleeve Jack saw the flashing on the screen as the machines beeping got louder and more intense. His mum laid still in the bed, the rise and fall of her breathing getting slower and slower.
“Help” Jack called out.
“HELP” he screamed into the halls begging for someone to help him.
People came rushing in, Doctors and nurses alike as the machines beeping became almost deafening. Something was wrong, something was very, very wrong. Jack stood at the back of the room watching all the people trying to save his mums life, he didn’t understand what was happening. Everyone was talking over one another and he couldn’t make out a word. A sob escaped him and he buried in his face it in his hands so he wouldn’t have to see anymore.
“Sweetheart, come with me”
A nurse put a hand to Jack’s arm and led him out of the room.
“Is... Is she gonna be okay?” Jack asked, his voice shaking about as much as he was.
“They’re doing the best they can but she’s a fighter your mum. Is your friend still here?”
He hadn’t realised it was the same nurse who’d brought him and Alex to the room earlier. The thought brought a lump to Jack’s throat. He shook his head and the nurse gave him a sad smile. She took him to an empty waiting room and told him that someone would be back to explain everything soon. Once she’d left Jack curled himself up on one of the chairs and tried not to cry again. He wanted Alex back, he couldn’t do this alone. He needed Alex’s arms around him again, he needed his voice whispered comfort in his ear but mostly he just needed Alex to be there. He stared out of the window that looked over the hospital car park, there wasn’t a person in sight just lots of cars all lined up like soldiers. His eyes wondered over the empty shells, it was just something to pass the time until one caught his eye. A black car packed in the corner he’d seen it before, he’d watched it drive in hours earlier. It was still there did that mean....
Jack didn’t know whether he loved Alex but he did know that he needed him.

Alex sat in the passenger side of his car, where he’d been ever since Jack had told him to leave. He hadn’t been able to make him drive away nor had he been able to sleep. He kept going over the whole scene in his head and just how fucking stupid he’d been. He wished he could go back and not say it, the saying was wrong, loving and losing was far worse and not loving at all. Who knew you could ruin your life so much with just 3 words.
He had been silent for so long Alex jumped at the sound of his phone bleeping beside him.
I know you’re here. Meet me by the front doors.
Alex didn’t need to read the name to know it was Jack.
Please
If only Alex could hear the desperation in Jack’s message. He sat and stared at his phone, how did Jack know? And more to the point what could he want? Pulling on the leather jacket that had been by his side the entire time he stepped at of his car. He stared up at the building watching as the sun began to appear from behind and bath everything in an orange light. As Alex approached he saw Jack standing the same place he’d been hours earlier expect this time he looked truly heartbroken.
“Jack...”
Jack didn’t reply he just collapsed on Alex’s chest and let the older wrap his arms around him and hold him as tight as possible.
“It’s okay, it’s going to be okay” Alex whispered.
Jack just cried on Alex’s shoulder as he continued to hold him.
“What’s happened?” Alex asked softly.
Jack sniffed and raised his head from Alex’s chest to look him in the eye. Alex had to resist brushing his messy two toned hair away from face.
“Mum something’s wrong... I don’t know but there were so many Doctors and then they asked me to leave”
“Oh Jack, it’s going to be okay. Your mum’s in safe hands here they’ll do their best”
“That’s what the nurse said”
“And she’s right”
Alex continued to run his hands over Jack’s back trying to comfort him.
“I’m sorry” he said, finally.
“Alex I...”
“No this time I need to talk. I’m sorry Jack. I blurted it out when I shouldn’t have and though I do mean it and god to I mean it. It’s okay if you want to forget about it and to forget about me”
“No” Jack answered.
“No, what?”
“No I don’t love you”
He knew it, he knew that’s what it was going to come to but the words still broke Alex’s heart in two. Alex moved away from Jack so he couldn’t feel him break but Jack gripped his hand.
“I don’t love you but I do need you”
“Huh?”
“I need you Alex, I can’t deal with all this alone and for some reason you make me feel like it’s going to be okay”
“if you need me than here’s exactly where I’ll stay”
Jack turned to face Alex and moves his messy caramel hair from his eyes before leaning down just enough to place his lips to Alex’s. Alex wraps his arms around Jack’s waist and pulls him closer so their bodies are touching. The feeling of Jack’s lips on his is more than Alex could have ever dreamt of, it’s the feeling to write songs about.