Change Your Ticket

Summer training for high school football and summer training for college football were two entirely different things. I spent the last four summers training with Coach and the guys and nothing could have prepared me for the gruesome practices I had been enduring.
As if that wasn’t bad enough, my roommate had decided to take over our room for the last couple of days. Leaving me to wonder around campus alone. Being away from home was a lot harder than I ever imagined it to be, and I’ve only been here two full weeks.

All of my hard work was about to pay off though. Today was the day Steve, our coach, announced the season line up. I was pretty confident I had sealed my spot as quarterback, despite being a freshman. The other guy was a junior, he was good but he wasn’t anything spectacular. Plus, I was chosen to come to this school because of my performance on the field. I didn’t think I had anything to worry about.

“Are you ready to go?” Derrick asked.

Derrick’s dorm was adjacent to mine. He was a year above me in school but stayed in the dorms because that’s the only way to keep his financial aid. He didn’t mind too much but I knew that was a lie. Most of the floor was comprised of freshman who were making the most of their college experience. I was a freshman and even I was annoyed.

“Just got to grab my bag,” I said.

Derrick had been one of the first string wide receivers last season and was gearing up to start again this season. I naturally gravitated towards him because of his position truthfully. I always made the best of friends with the wide receivers because it helped in the game, but also because they’re usually the chillest people on the team.

Aside from Derrick I had bonded well with Tommy and Alex. Tommy was junior and the lead center player. He reminded me a lot of Jason, in that they were both party boys. Alex was also a junior and played opposite of Derrick as a wide receiver. That was my new clique and as much as I liked hanging out with them I missed my boys from Mass High.



With one week left until classes started most of my time was spent on the field. Being on the field was a lot better than sitting in my room so I didn’t mind too much. Something about the turf and jersey put me at ease. The field was the only place I felt I belonged right now. It was the only place where I could focus on football and nothing else.

As usual, practice started with routine warm ups. Jumping jacks, sprints, stretches and some toss passes. I used to not mind warm ups in the past. At Mass High, most of our conversations that didn’t deal with football happened during warm ups. Here warm ups were dead silent, everyone focusing on doing each exercise perfectly trying to avoid injury.

Sometimes it got to be too much. Football was supposed to be fun. A lot of hard work, but fun. That didn’t seem to matter to these guys, especially Coach Steve. All he cared about was getting the perfect team ready to win titles. I tried not to let it bother me though. When I found it bothering my I often glanced down at my forearm, a constant reminder of why I was here.

After graduation the boys and I decided to do something that many would consider stupid. By many I mean Josylne who reprimanded all of us when we got home. She was just mad she wasn’t included though. Etched into my left forearm was the Mass High Logo. Within the thin borders surrounding the “MH” letters, were the boys numbers followed by 2011-2014, the years we won state. All of us got one, even Max who had turn eighteen just days before. His dates were different than ours of course. He was waiting until the end of the season to cap the dates off. There wasn’t a doubt in mind that if they won Josylne was going to get one too.

After warm ups everyone broke off into their assigned groups. Since Steve hadn’t read off the roster yet we continued to run plays alternating between quarterbacks. Everyone was pretty much set in their positions but me. I never had to share a position with someone, not even when I was a freshman at Mass High. I always had alternates but never ones that threatened my playing time. That wasn’t the case here. Ben was a good quarterback and he definitely wanted the position, meaning I had to try just as hard.

Ben went in for the first round. That’s usually how things happened and I had stopped fighting it. With him going in first it allowed me to watch what he did right and wrong. It was quite beneficial to me, making my passes smoother than his. Ben’s first pass was an incomplete followed by an interception. He was struggling today. When it was my turn, I threw all four passes complete. Ben’s sullen face said it all when I returned to the side lines.

Ben didn’t like me and he made that very clear from day one. The first day we met back in June, he pointed out how stupid my tattoo was. He said it meant I wasn’t serious about this team and that I should cover it on game days. Most of the older guys on the team shared a similar outlook on it. It was very clear where their allegiances lied.

Practice continued on until Steve called us all in. We huddled on the fifty yard lines, knees in the turf awaiting to hear Steve’s words. Steve was a younger coach. He was full of energy and hope that sometimes transformed into aggression when things weren’t going as planned. As long as things were going good he was peachy but the minute a pass was incomplete the anger came out.

“So far we’ve had a great training season,” he praised. “Many of you are more comfortable in your positions now that you’ve been in them for a while. With that said we do need to figure out who the starting quarterback will be.”

I felt my heartbeat race. I wasn’t one to get nervous, especially on the field. Football was the one thing I was always sure I was good at. There was no real need to be nervous. Suddenly a wave of anxiety washed over me as I awaited for the results.

“After careful deliberation, the coaches and I have decided that Ben will be starting this season. Parker you will be the alternate. Good practice today everyone, see you tomorrow,” he said dismissing us.

I was paralyzed. The rest of the team followed Steve to the locker room but I couldn’t move. Alternate? This had to be some twisted dream. I shut my eyes hoping that when I opened them I would be lying in my dorm room. I had no such luck. This wasn’t a dream this was reality. Some twisted kind of reality.

Not wanting to draw further attention to myself I headed toward the locker room. I tried to hide my disappointment. Ben may have won the spot but he didn’t win the opportunity to see my true feelings. I congratulated him in the locker room before heading back to my dorm.

“Hey Parker,” Tommy yelled after me. “Some of the guys are going out right now. You want to come?”

“No thanks,” I declined. “I have a phone call date to attend to.”

It wasn’t a total lie. I was probably going to end up talking to Josylne on the phone. Tommy shook his head in fake disappointment before returning to the guys. Leaving me to track back to my room alone.



It was six o’clock on a Friday and instead of celebrating with the team I was in my room moping. This was very unfamiliar territory I was headed towards and I had no way of coping. For the first time in my life I didn’t feel like I had a team behind me.

Being the alternate quarterback meant I wasn’t the leader. I had no say in plays. I had no chance to make the winning passes. My job was keeping the bench warm and hoping that Ben got hurt. Not that I would wish harm on him, despite the fact that he deserved it.

Ben wasn’t a better player than I was. He continuously threw incomplete passes, opting to show off his arm rather than his ability to control the ball. If he played like that in games we were going to lose. There was no way the receivers could get there in time to catch the ball. Ben wasn’t even courteous enough to stall, he’d just catch the snap and throw.

I tried to think of plausible explanations to this decision. All I could come up with was that he was older. He knew the team better than I did. He’d played on it for two seasons already. It was such a bullshit argument though. Time on a team shouldn’t wave skill.

I was so frustrated. All I wanted to do was talk to Josylne but I didn’t want to worry her. She had enough on her plate with the Mass High team. I didn’t need her worrying about her stupid boyfriend in California. I didn’t want to make her feel like this was her fault, because I knew she would.

My phone rang beside me as her name flashed across the screen. I picked up, making the conscious decision to not tell her what had happened to me. Trying my best to put on a happy attitude I answered.

“Hey Daniels.”

Hearing her voice improved my mood instantly. I don’t care how corny it sounded it was the truth. Being this far away was going to end up killing me. I just knew it.

“God I miss you,” I breathed.

“I know,” she whispered. “How was practice?”

“It was...it was fine,” I hesitated.

“Is everything okay?” she asked.

I let my head fall back on the pillow. Was everything okay? Not in the slightest. My girlfriend was on the other side of the damn country. My best friends were in different states. I wasn’t going to be a quarterback this season. I didn’t even have a team.

“Yeah everything is fine,” I assured her.

As hard as it was to lie to her I needed to. Josylne was the sole reason I was down here and she knew that. If I told her I was miserable she would feel guilty. That was the last thing I wanted to happen. Josylne needed to have the best senior year she could have. I was already hindering her ability to do so by being so far away from her. There was no way I was going to throw this on her too.

When I finally hung up with Josylne it was nine o’clock. We had been on the phone for three hours talking about nonsense. For a moment it was as if I was back in her room at home. But I wasn’t and I wasn’t going to be fore quite some time. Distance sucks but it was all worth it for her. Everything was worth it for her.