Animatronic Eyes

I wiped my eyes on my palms, the wretched feeling of dread and guilt consuming me. Bitter tears still rolled down my sticky cheeks, tickling my flesh. I couldn't gather a thought that didn't scream 'go away' or 'let me be'. I didn't want to talk to anyone, as well. Even though, I probably should, I pulled my knees to my chest, trying to calm myself down.

I felt consumed... I needed out of the house, away from people. Away from where anyone could find me. I stood shakily, rummaged through the closet for some clothes, putting them on before I could look too muchat what I'd chosen. I reached for my MP3 player on the bed, stuffing it into my back jeans pocket. Gathering my purple headphones into a small bundle, and tucking it into my jacket pocket.

I struggled to store my thoughts and put on a nonchalant expression as I jogged down the stairs. Snagging my keys off the kitchen counter, mom stood at the stove, her back to me, phone to her ear, the sizzling of whatever was cooking in the pan covered the sound of my exit.

I put in my earbuds, turned up the volume to the first song on shuffle, and I began making my way north on foot. Following the sidewalk past my neighbor's houses, the world beyond the music blaring in my ears becoming blurred. I just needed to think, so that's what I'm going to do. No voice will speak to me, and I can just think. Me, myself and I.

After three blocks, I had managed to evade the voices. It tried to scream above the blaring volume of the music in my ears, but died out quickly when it realized that I was concentrating very firmly

Don't let them in...

I kept moving, venturing further up the streets until I walked neighborhoods I'd never been in. I was what I needed.

I came across a small park, in the center of a round court of houses. No children on the creaking swings or drifting merry-go-round. I figured this place was as good as any, and began to cut across the street towards it.

I reached the swings, and sat down on the middle one, looking up at the partially cloudy sky, I found the tragic color of grey actually comforting. Grass was beginning to grow and take over the matted brown that covered most of the park's ground and the surrounding neighborhoods. I might actually have appreciated it all if I didn't feel so damn paranoid.

Nothing made sense... Maybe none of it wanted to, I don't know... But I do know this: Blake faced something horrifying in his last minutes at the pizzeria. Whatever it was that attacked him, or chased him out...

I bit my lip a little bit as I stared forward without actually seeing anything. I sat that way for a long time.

Something was off about everyone... Well, most everyone. Cyrus, particuarly. That day with the kid in Pirate's Cove. She exchanged words with Mr. Miller, suspicious nods and gestures, and instantly they were in sync, they knew what was going on...

No.

No, that's ridiculous... I'm not seriously blaming Mr. Miller for anything... Am I? What did he do, honestly? He was always an enthusiastic employer. Yet, he had his moments... You'd catch him staring off into space sometimes, or even staring at the animatronics is some post-terror mode. He moved through each day with the skill of a well trained business man, ready for every obstacle. But what was it about the animatronics?... Surely they can't do anything.

I push back against that thought before it can swell into something I can't simply put away. The big, fat what if... still hovered in the air. It was true. What if it was something else I'd missed entirely?

Now that was something I feared... If I missed too much, or wasn't observant, it could effect me and the people around me greatly. If I even let go... For so much as a second... That could be us... The end.

Wait.... No, am I seriously bringing the animatronics up again? It's ridiculous... But I'd be lying if I denied having this horrible feeling towards them everyday. Even since the first day I'd seen them... But then again, I was an impressionable child at age eight. But why would it effect me so greatly now?

I shake my head in denial, my loose hair swayed across my shoulders under my charcoal colored hood. It was all highly unlikely... Had I completely lost any sense of reality I've ever had? Become crazy from working in that place?

The more true the statement became... The more worried and compressed I felt. That's when I realized what I'd have to do... I didn't want to, it always had a large effect of my physical and mental condition afterwards...

But the risk compared to what I could learn?

It was time... I paused the song and pulled out the earbuds, tucking my phone into my pocket. The sound of the wind washing over rooftops and through tree branches was my serenity now. I breathed slowly, feeling my mental strength fading as I allowed myself to lower the 'gates' to my mind. To lose control was something I feared greatly. But it was something I had to do, as well.

I closed my eyes and relaxed my mind. Concentrating hard on forming the words, and mentally hitting send.

I need your help...