Nirvana

Harley dropped onto the couch, tossed a bag of doritos to Kelly before she ripped open her bag of gummy worms and tickled Hannah with her foot. The baby looked up from where she was occupied on the floor with toys and giggled. Harley smiled softly and bit the head off her gummy worm as Emma brought their drinks into the living room.

"I figured we'd just order in a little later on." Emma told them, passing Kelly the ginger ale, and Harley a glass of wine. She glanced at Kelly and asked, "Is Craig stopping by to pick you up?"

Kelly nodded, put her hand on her stomach and took large gulp of ginger ale before she said, "Yes. He's coated his car in plastic for me. In case I puke."

Emma let out a chuckle and told her, "Shea kept puke bags in his glove department when I was pregnant with Hannah."

"That's so smart. I should have told Craig that!" Kelly stated, making a note of it in her phone.

The pregame began, and Harley felt her stomach do a flip flop when James appeared on the TV screen for a pre game interview. She leaned forward and set her wine glass on the coffee table before getting up and going straight into the bathroom down the hall.

She heard Kelly say something to Emma but she didn't hear what it was as she shut the door and leaned against it. She clenched her jaw tightly as her eyes began to water and she felt like her heart was hammering against her chest. After a few minutes, when she figured out how to breathe normally again Harley splashed water on her face and stared at herself in the mirror. She shook her head at herself. Unbelievable. She always said she wasn't going to let another man do this to her after Rich and look where she was.

When she opened the door she practically jumped out of her skin upon finding Emma standing on the other side. With her hand against her chest Harley made her way into the kitchen, Emma hot on her heels. Emma watched as she grabbed the tequila from the top shelf of the pantry, and went back to the couch without even grabbing a glass.

Both Kelly and Emma watched her with concern as she took a large drink straight from the bottle and then said, "Fuck him."

"I'd have to agree." Emma stated, knowing her words were being ignored.

Harley took another long drink from the bottle, looked at the TV as they were getting ready for puck drop and stated, "I am a god damn catch. I am… I am irreplaceable."

"You are." Kelly told her in agreement.

"I'd like to see him find someone better than me." Harley muttered to herself, grabbing a handful of gummy worms.

The first period had ended, the Preds were losing, the food was ordered and Harley was tipsy. Kelly said nothing, just sat there and sipped her ginger ale and ate her doritos, and Emma kept her eyes on Harley, each time she reached for the bottle Emma wanted to take it away but she didn't. This was the most emotional she had seen Harley since the break up and she knew she needed a way to let it out.

"I'm like Beyonce. Only I'm not, because no one cheats on Beyonce." Harley stated, catching both Kelly and Emma's attention. Her eyes watered and before she knew it she was crying, and both girls in the room didn't know what to do or say. Harley took another drink, before she put the top on the bottle and pushed it away from herself, and without even bothering to wipe her tears she asked with a shaky voice, "Do I just look like someone to cheat on? I mean there's got to be something, some kind of reason this keeps happening to me."

"I thought you said it was just a big fight, about not knowing each other enough." Emma commented, watching as Harley let out a laugh through her tears and finally used the cuff of her sweater to wipe her face.

"It was, until he let it slip that he almost had sex with his ex almost fiance, and now I can't get the picture out of my head. It just keeps playing over and over and over and over and over and over… that doesn't even sound like a word anymore." Harley mumbled, hiccuping before she wiped at the new tears that were falling.

"Wait…hold up… what the fuck does almost fiance mean?" Kelly asked, ignoring the look Emma shot her.

Harley shrugged, "Means he almost had a fiance, until she left him before he could ask. I'm starting to think maybe he cheated on her too."

"Harley, that's not the kind of guy James is and you know it." Emma told her with a pointed look.

"He did it to me. Can you just stop playing the captains wife for a second and be a friend? I don't want you to stick up for him, I want you to join in on the bashing." Harley told her with her eyes narrowed.

"I'm down." Kelly stated.

Emma sighed and watched Harley for a few moments before she told her, "I'm not being the captains wife, I'm your friend, but as much as I'd like to join in on the bash fest I'm not going to."

Harley got up from her spot, grabbed her bag from the table before she told Emma, "You know what? You two can just hang out and talk about epidurals and breastfeeding and all the other fun stuff that I'm not gonna get to experience because I can't manage to keep a man around for more than six months. I'm gonna go home, but really have a good night Mrs. Shea Weber."

She made a point to close the door a little bit louder than normal before she walked down the driveway and glanced around. She had no way of getting home, she'd spent the night in the guest room again and hadn't gone to pick up her car from Diosa, and she couldn't walk. They lived in the suburbs there was no way she could walk home, especially not with almost half a bottle of tequila in her system.

So Harley dropped her bag and sat down on the curb by the grass. She let out a puff of air and ran her hands through her tangled hair in annoyance. She didn't bother turning around as she heard the door to the house close, she didn't even turn to look as Emma sat down beside her. All she asked was, "You sure you can miss this important game, Mrs. Captain?"

Emma sighed, "I'm gonna let that slide because you're kind of a mess right now."

"Kind of?" Harley asked with a bitter laugh. She leaned back onto her palms and said, "I don't know how to function right now. I let him come in and sweep me off my feet and now I don't know that I remember how to be me anymore without him in the picture. I don't know when I stopped being Harley and became James Neal's girlfriend."

"You didn't. It was just a new thing, you were trying to get used to a new relationship with a new person and new boundaries. It doesn't mean you lost yourself." Emma told her softly, knocking her foot into Harley's.

Harley looked down at the tear in the knee of her jeans and her eyes welled up with tears again. She pulled at the tear, making it bigger, and asked, "How did I put myself in this position twice?"

"Oh honey." Emma wrapped arm around her shoulder, pulling her into her side before she told her, "He's an idiot, you were the best thing he had going for him."

Harley looked up at the brunette beside her and said, "I thought you said you weren't gonna take part in the bashing fest?"

Emma chuckled and told her, "It's not bashing if it's the truth babe."

- - -
"Tonight I'm gonna give you all my love in the back seat. BUBBLE POP ELECTRIC, BUBBLE POP ELECTRIC. Gonna speed it down and slow it up in the back seat. BUBBLE POP ELECTRIC. Uh-O in the back seat."

When Shea, Pekka, Craig, Roman and Emma walked into the bar they were shocked to find Harley dancing around while wiping down tables. Emma couldn't help but chuckle at the fact that of all the songs she could play she was playing Gwen Stefani, Harley had trouble admitting her love for the No Doubt singer, but they both knew it was strong.

Harley glanced up, making sure she knew who was walking in the bar before she went back to dancing and wiping tables down. It was then that Craig noticed her hair and exclaimed loudly, "What the hell did you do to your hair?"

Harley stopped dancing and turned to them, ran her hands over her now much shorter hair and smiled. She had gone in for a trim that morning and the stylist managed to convince her to get a 'Julianne Hough' cut, and despite not even knowing who that was Harley agreed, but she still hadn't gotten used to it. She tossed the rag into the sink of the bar and simply shrugged in response, stating, "You know... got a hair cut, went on a new diet, dropped 220 pounds. I personally feel great. Someone tell me how good I look."

Emma and Shea chuckled, Craig shook his head in amusement and Pekka just looked confused. Roman grinned and told her, "You look pretty damn good to me."

"Oh honey I am way too old for you." Harley stated, reaching out to pat his cheek for good measure. As the guys laughed at their teammates expense Harley stated, "I think my problem was dating younger."

"I'm three years older than you." Pekka stated with a sly grin.

Harley shook her head in amusement, "My other problem was dating men who fought over a piece of frozen rubber for a living."

"Ouch. Wounded." Shea stated with a smirk.

"You'll live." Harley stated, moving a few bottles of vodka around. Finally she turned to Emma, her cheeks flushed and apologized, "I'm sorry for yesterday."

There was a look exchanged between teammates as Emma shrugged and told her, "You were drunk... and right."

"So you're okay then? I mean… as far as the whole Neal thing goes?" Pekka asked curiously, watching her cautiously as she nodded.

"Yeah, I mean if he walks in here all bets are off but as for me, I mean I'll live. It's not like I lost a leg or something." Harley stated, catching Shea's eye. He smiled, and Harley couldn't help but smile back. She felt bad for the spot they had put him in as her friend and James' captain, but even though he wouldn't say it out loud when it came down to it he would take Harley's side every time.

"Oh if he walks in here he's never gonna play another game of hockey in his life." Emma stated, making everyone turn to her in surprise. She shrugged and said, "You hurt my best friend and I'll show you a crazy Weber."

Shea let out a laugh and nodded in confirmation, "It's true."

After things settled down Emma reached out and tugged on Harley's short hair and told her, "I think it looks great by the way."

Craig's cheeks flushed and he told her, "I was just surprised."

Harley shrugged, "Try being me. I haven't cut my hair in like over 10 years."

"That's insane." Roman stated.

Harley shrugged and then turned to Craig to ask, "So are you getting excited?"

"For?"

She couldn't held but reach over and smack him upside the head which got the guys laughing as she told him, "You only have a few months before you're on daddy duty."

"Oh god don't remind me." Craig stated, and if he were a dramatic person Harley was sure he would have slammed his head against the bar top. He simply said, "Kelly is driving me crazy."

"Is her OCD going crazy?" Emma asked curiously, when she was nearing the end of her pregnancy with Hannah she found that she had developed OCD, but Kelly already had it so she could only imagine how much worse it had gotten.

Craig nodded and told them, "I had to sleep on the couch last night because I put the clean onsies in the wrong spot and she got mad at me."

Pekka shook his head, "This is precisely why I don't have children."

"You don't have children because you're a child." Harley told him with a grin.

"Ahh, she's back." Pekka said with a grin.

Harley rolled her eyes, held up the Pepsi sprayer and warned him, "I'll do it."

Emma eyed her cautiously before asking, "Okay who put happy pills in her drink?"

Harley turned the sprayer to Emma, who rolled her eyes, and Harley told her, "I've done it before. I'll do it again."

"You've sprayed your own best friend with soda before?" Roman asked her, making Emma, Shea and Pekka chuckle.

Emma shook her head at Roman and explained, "Nope, but she did get Rich in the face with it once."

When both Craig and Roman looked at her in alarm Harley put the sprayer down and shrugged, explaining, "What? He was annoying me. I warned him. Not my fault he sat down right when I hit the button."

"The fact that you talk like it's no big deal makes this 100 times better." Craig stated with a laugh.

"How many times do I have to tell you people? Don't piss the bartender off."