A Little Sweetness in My Life

The Jackets were playing the Penguins tonight. I had this game circled on my calendar for weeks and had been planning out my day for the longest time. Kylee had left the house early this morning to go to her grandparents’ house and pick up someone for me while I got myself dressed and ready for a special lunch. Ryan had texted me earlier that morning, asking if I would be at the game. Just reading the text made me have anxiety. Tonight would either end really well or horrible.

Today also happened to fall on a very….interesting day in my life. Kylee and I were just starting at OSU and had decided to take a road trip for Spring Break. We didn’t want to be traditional and go to Cancun like everyone else. We loaded up the SUV we shared and started driving southwest. Our first stop of the trip was in Pittsburgh, where we spent two nights of partying and enjoying the dive bars.

We were freshly 19 and going crazy. People were buying us drinks every bar we went to.
The last bar of the night was more crowded than we expected. Lots of people packed into the small space but were mostly the older crowd. Working class, blue collar people for the most part, who were more than kind enough to buy us drinks. Then the room seemed to get less packed as a group of guys walked in. Kylee was elbowing me, mumbling about them being a hockey team that she couldn’t think of the name for, due to both of us being smashed. She slid away to use the bathroom and one of the hockey boys took her place. He was all olive skin, dark silky hair and scruff. He had these dark eyes that seemed to hold the secrets of the universe. He spoke in a fluid tone, like velvet sliding across silk. I was way too drunk and he was way too French for me to ignore him.

We spent all night together; making sure his neighbors could hear every moan and squeak of his bed frame. I didn’t even seen Kylee until noon the next day, when we were supposed to continue on our road trip. We exchanged phone numbers, just in case I was ever in town again or he came up my way. Then we continued our journey. Kylee and I finished Spring Break and went back to campus, exhausted and feeling like our hangovers had hung around a bit too long. Hockey boy came to Columbus about a month later, took me out to dinner and we drank at his hotel, then let all of his teammates know exactly who he was and drive his team crazy with the squeaking and screaming.

He left again and I went back to my life at school. I started feeling strange about three weeks later. I missed my period; I got sick every morning and felt like I had caught the plague. Kylee and I knew….we knew but I was too scared to say it. We took pregnancy tests from the medical center and used all six of them. Each and every one was positive. We went to the medical center for an exam and were given the news. I was six weeks pregnant. I remember crying, thinking I wouldn’t be able to finish school. I couldn’t imagine how I would tell my family, let alone tell him that he had a child coming. I somehow managed each conversation. He wasn’t mad…no, he was happy. He wanted me to finish school in Pittsburgh. I couldn’t do it. He agreed to visit as often as he could and help as much as possible. Kylee’s grandparents offered to take care of my baby while I finished school and everything, somehow, worked out okay for the most part. Now, four years later, my beautiful boy is walking through the front door with his Auntie Kylee.

“Momma!” Alex cheered, running at me full speed and wrapping his arms around my neck. I laughed and attacked him with kisses, making him start giggling.

“Are you excited for today?” I asked, smiling and fixing his hair a little bit. He must have fallen asleep on the way home.

“Yeah! Daddy is coming!” He cheered again. He was such a happy little boy. I told him to go watch cartoons in my room and looked over at Kylee. She had the mail in her hand, handing me mine. The usual hand addressed envelope to me was there, knowing a check for some crazy amount was there.

“Have you told Ryan yet?” She asked, sitting on the couch with me. I sighed and shook my head, running my hands through my hair.

“I don’t know how….” I said, looking at her with wide eyes. She sighed as well and nodded a little. She remembered what happened when I told my ex. “Oh hey, Ryan! This is my four year old and here’s his dad, Kris fucking Letang from your rival team!”

“He’s very understanding….he’s a good guy, Katie.” She said, rubbing my back gently. I nodded a little bit, checking my watch and seeing that it was time to go. “Text me if you need anything and I’ll see you at the game.” She said.

“Alex! Allons!” I said, hearing him scrambling up and come running with a big smile. Kris wanted me to keep him speaking French and I did my best. When he spent time in Canada during the summer, he picked it up more. I said goodbye to Kylee and we got in the car, driving downtown to meet up with Kris…I still don’t know how to tell Ryan…