Master of Sardonic Wit

April 22 2000

"If you weren't here doing this, what would you be doing?"

"Repairing Vanessa..."

Steve bit his lip and shot an amused glance at James who was leaned back in his chair relaxed while their interviewer looked tenser than any of the other guys they had met. After all, James with his dyed spiked hair and bright pink suit was a rather imposing sight to see next to Steve himself completely in red (even his hair).

It was a strange thing to see, yes, but more imposing than anything else. The interviewer clearly wasn't used to interviewing musicians like this and it was obvious to both James and Steve who tried to amuse themselves more than to actually give real answers to the whole interview.

Steve's thoughts drifted away from the interview as he began to think of the things happening in his life right now. The relationship with Kayleigh was starting to get worse, she was barely home at the penthouse or at the little apartment they rented together not far from the penthouse.

That and the arguments they've been having were constantly getting worse and worse. It upset Steve to think that this might mean the end of their relationship, yet he knew that there was nothing he could do. He sighed and rolled his eyes when one of the interviewer's questions penetrated his train of thoughts and pulled him back to the interview.

"What kind of fun hate mail do you get?"

"The hate mail's okay, it's those pesky interviews we can't stomach."

James was really starting to blow the interviewer off and answer more with annoyance than humour. Even he was getting tired of this interview and normally, James loved interviews. Because then he could say random stuff and they would only get a bigger cult following than before, or so he claimed. Steve knew that the guy just couldn't have anybody see that he could be serious outside the image he was trying to put out there.

Steve got in his thoughts again and dreamed away from the perky interviewer in front of him. Next time, they should just send a younger person who was at least a bit into the scene they were in. Not someone that clearly had just read their Wikipedia article just a few minutes before the interview started. James slumped further down in his chair and crossed his arms in front of his chest. Both men looked worn out and bored, but clearly the interviewer didn't notice this and if he did, he ignored it as best as he could.

"What do kids' parents think of you?"

"They are outraged...-" Steve started, suddenly opening his mouth again.

"That our new CD got pushed back," James finished with a smirk he sends to Steve who quickly shot it back.

"So, on tour, what are each of your separate roles and responsibilities?"

"Who says we have such a thing?" James raised an eyebrow and pursed his lips together, clearly intending to make the interviewer sweat. It wasn't his attitude, he just wanted to get out of here faster and break the interviewer so he would just call it quits. Steve had seen it several times over the past few interviews that they had done (some of them even didn't get published or send to them so they could collect them).

"Because you got to be responsible for something whether it’s on tour or just in the studio? If you don't know who's responsible for what, how can you be organized? Next thing you know, Steve forgot his guitar because he thought Vanessa would bring it, or you didn't bring the hair gel because you thought Steve would."

"Okay, listen to this, Urine is in charge of asking stupid questions, Steve is in charge of asking stupid questions, Kitty is in charge of asking stupid questions, and Vanessa...she's just a robot that I need to go and repair now."

James stood up from his seat and walked out of the room, the interviewer sighed and started putting everything away. Steve shot one last glance at the man, at least he head tried, but whatever he did, it hadn't worked. It also didn't help that James hadn’t heard from Chantal in a few days since the tour was taking up all of their time. Same with him, Kitty and Vanessa.

They were so busy with each other, brainstorming or being on stage and afterwards meeting all of their fans (with pleasure of course) that they often got to their bus early in the morning and just fell right asleep in their bunks. This only resulted in some angry phonecalls for some and others annoyance that their partner didn’t call to check up on them to see if they were still alright. Chantal was one of the latter ones.

She trusted James more than she trusted anybody else, well, except her parents then, so of course she wouldn't call him the moment he didn't call for a few days. James wanted her to call however and refused to call her in the hopes that she would call first. A useless waste of time in Steve's mind but it was the way he and Chantal worked and so be it.

May 10 2000

It didn’t surprise him when it happened; it was only a matter of time. The arguments got worse and worse with every phone call. And the only thing that bothered Steve the most is that she had already moved out the moment he left on tour and that they had to break up through the phone. Steve had never felt so bad before when she said that she couldn’t take it anymore and called it quits. Even now, hours later, he still felt horrible.

James had been there when he had gotten the phone call but before the man could say something, Steve had fled to his bunk and pretended to be asleep for the next few hours before the show. Now the show was over and his band mates were signing autographs outside. He didn’t feel like doing that and had told them he wasn’t feeling all too well. Vanessa and Kitty had shot him a worried look but both of their looks combined could get the intensity of the worried glance James shot him for a few seconds.

He sighed and looked up at the bunk above him, there were pictures of him and Kayleigh plastered on the wooden surface and his hand quickly reached out to pull them off. He smiled sadly as he stuffed the pictures in his suitcase at the foot of his bunk, deep down under the clothes he wouldn’t wear anyway. As if he could bury the past by burying those pictures in his small suitcase.

James’ loud voice quickly filled the bus and Steve shot up, almost hitting the bunk above him before he pulled his blanket half over him and pretended to sleep. James shouted something at him but Steve didn’t reply, just forcing his eyes shut and curling up in a ball. He wasn’t actually tired, he just didn’t want to talk to people right now because then he would be forced to talk about what happened and he didn’t even want to think about it right now.

“Hey Steve you up?” James poked his head in Steve’s bunk and poked the man’s shoulder. When Steve grunted, he got the message and just sat down on the bunk right across Steve and didn’t say anything else.

“I’ll take that as a no, but honestly man, the girl’s, they’re worried and asking questions. I’m saying they should ask you since it is none of my damn business but, I’m sorry man, I mean, phone call break up, that must’ve sucked.”

Steve didn’t reply again and just stared at the wall in front of him, he bit back the words he wanted to shout at James. Words that he wanted to really shout at Kayleigh but since she wouldn’t pick up her phone anyway when she saw that he called, he just held them back, letting them echo through his mind over and over again.

“Just, don’t shut yourself off the band right now alright man? I mean, we’re here for you, even if you want us to smack a bitch.”

Steve nodded curtly and stretched out in his bunk, letting James know that he was awake and at least listening to what his friend was saying. James reached out and patted his shoulder again before he climbed in his own bunk, right above Steve’s.

The voices of Vanessa and Kitty were hushed when they did finally join the two men in the bunk area. Steve let his eyes open for a few seconds, listening to their voices before falling back asleep. He heard James grunt and tell the women to shut the hell up before turning around in his sleep. Vanessa and Kitty fell silent just after that being said and then continued to get ready for bed in silence, probably shooting amused glances at each other every few seconds.