There's a Certain Loneliness in Your Company

Two weeks. It had been two weeks since Glitch had heard or seen from ONE. Not a single sign of his presence. It was peacefully quiet in the Killjoy's hideout. Skyla made a full recovery and was back to her firecracker self. Glitch still didn't quiet fit the mold the others did, but she had improved drastically in the short time. They had been on a few runs, continued to head out into the desert for target practice, and drove recklessly through the zones in Eight Legs to pass the time. When the rest of the group would turn in for the day, Fun Ghoul would take extra time to show Toxic how to do everything from shoot her gun properly to being able to barrel roll safely out of windows and buildings while on the run. Something from their first encounter he couldn't help but chuckle at when he recalled it.

The two of them only grew closer as the days passed, as did Poison and Skyla. The guys stopped sleeping on the couches and chairs and returned to the rooms they loaned to them a few short weeks ago. Despite the heat, Glitch enjoyed being curled up next to Ghoul, listening to his even breathing. Quiet, peaceful Fun Ghoul. Something most people didn't have the privilege to witness.

No one went anywhere alone anymore for their own safety. Glitch wondered if everyone knew that everyone else was involved with ONE and just chose not to discuss it, or if the others really were ignorant to this fact. Glitch only dared to discuss the matter with Fun Ghoul when she was sure they weren't in earshot of anyone else. After all the time that had passed since he informed her he was a part of ONE's game as well, he still kept fairly quiet about it, not giving too much away.

One night, well after dark had settled and the house was silent, Toxic stared up at Ghoul as he began to fade into sleep, their sweaty skin pressed against each other making it next to impossible to get comfortable. Her mind was racing with anything and everything and she sighed in frustration.

"Ghoul?" She whispered into the dark. Her hand raised with his chest as he took in a deep breath.

"Yeah?" His voice croaked, barely awake. She hesitated, afraid to ask the same question she had been asking for days now with no avail. She heard Ghoul's breathing starting to become shallow again, signaling that he was falling back asleep.

"Where do you think ONE is?"

He jumped at the sound of her voice, before letting out a long sigh and a quick stretch. He rolled to face her, prepared to have the same conversation they had most nights, doing his best not to sound annoyed.

"Who cares? He hasn't been here. That's all that matters."

"Yeah... but why? Isn't this unusual?"

"For him to come and go as he pleases? No."

"I mean, he's usually here, or running into us out in the zones, or kidnapping--"

"Babe, listen." He cut her off with another sigh. His hand reached up in the dark and pushed some sweaty strands of hair that had fallen in her face from her unrest. "No one has been on a run by themselves since we found Skyla. As far as he's concerned, he doesn't know we know about both of our involvement with him. He won't talk to two of us at once."

Though he made a good point, she still wasn't satisfied.

"What about the others? Does that mean they're involved?"

"Toxic," he finally snapped at her, saying her name through clenched teeth. "What does it matter? If they are, they are obviously on our side. If not, we're keeping them safe for now. Isn't that enough?"

Her face began to flush. That's the first time he really got angry at her. Though it was only the tone of his voice, it still made her upset.

"I don't know... I don't understand why everything has to be a secret." Her voice was even quieter.

"Don't you get it? The man is a heartless bastard. He would ghost any one of us if he really wanted to. Remember how scared you were when I told you I knew? How do you think they would feel if they worked for him? He has this fear instilled in us. He may be putting us all in his army, but then he sicks us after each other. Survival of the fittest. Once he has whittled it down to the strongest, he's charging Battery City. He may have asked you to join him, but that doesn't mean you will. Some of us are just target practice for the real battle ahead." By now he had sat up, leaving Glitch alone on the too small bed. As hard as she tried to fight it, she felt tears began to well up in her eyes as the reality of what he said settled in.

"So that's it? I'm just target practice?"

"Damnit Glitch, that's not what I meant."

"No, but that's what I am. I knew there had to be a reason he 'wanted' me. A Ritalin Rat actually fighting in battery city? No... no I'm just bait for the rest of you." She felt the start of her hot, salty tears rolling down her face. She knew in her heart she was right, no matter what Ghoul said.

"Baby, please. That's not it." His voice was softer now as he started to lay back down next to her, attempting to pull her to his chest. She quickly moved, dodging his embracing and stood up from the bed. She wiped away what tears had fallen, and did her best to not let another one escape.

"When's the last time you spoke to him?"

"Love, please lower your voice. The others--"

"Stop it with the fucking pet names!" Toxic barked at him. She knew she was being too loud, but she couldn't stop herself.

"Toxic,--"

"Ghoul. Answer me."

"I don't know. I guess right after I joined."

"Which was when?" She folded her arms around herself protectively. He figured it was best to just answer her. He didn't want her waking up the others, especially with this conversation.

"About six months ago."

"So why wouldn't he check in with you all the time? Why is he always finding me, telling me how 'good' I am. How I'm 'improving'?" She air quoted and emphasized these words.

"Toxic..."

"You think he gets off on prepping me for the slaughter? Spending precious time and energy to help me improve so I can at least put up some sort of fight. Give him something to watch when they zap me?"

"Toxic." Ghoul had stood up from the bed now to face her. She took a step back from him.

"Maybe it will be you. Maybe I've just played right into his hand. You might be the lucky one to end my pathetic life."

"God, damnit Glitch!" He quickly reached forward, grabbing her firmly by her arms. She winced as he squeezed her more than a little force. He pulled her towards him with a strength she couldn't match. "What did I fucking tell you? I said I would protect you. I've been training you for a reason. No one's going to die. Not you. Not me. I won't let them hurt you. But you have to fucking promise me you won't give up."

She began to whimper again, trying to move out of his grasp. His eyes shot down to his hands on her arms and quickly let her go. She stood in front of him, her face twisted in pain and embarrassment. His breath was shaky as he reached up to touch her arms again, gently. She didn't step away, but couldn't stop herself from flinching and guilt washed over him. His fingertips traced lightly over her sure-to-be bruised skin. He didn't stop this time as he slowly leaned forward, wrapping his arms around her waist, burying his face into her neck.

She hesitated before bring her arms up and around his neck. She felt his lips as they left small kisses down her shoulder to her collarbone and back again. His hot breath washed over her as he kept mouthing the words "I'm so sorry". She wasn't sure if it was sweat, tears, or a mixture of both she felt smearing on her. She couldn't let him do this to himself.

Toxic placed her hands on the sides of his face, pulling him away from her so she could see him.He looked miserable and her heart twisted painfully in response. In the midst of this confusing outburst of emotions, she found herself pulling his lips to her own and kissing him with as much passion as she could muster up. She felt his body melting underneath her, finally relaxing after several grueling minutes. He took no time to respond, his hands reaching down and grabbing her around her thighs. She jumped into his arms, straddling his waist as he carried her back to the bed, laying them back down. Both of their mouths were greedy, trying to kiss everything at once and it still not being enough. His teeth skimmed over her shoulders, down to her breasts as they peeled their clothes off one another. She groaned loudly as she felt his erection grinding against her. He shushed her as one hand reached to pull down her panties while he slipped two fingers from the other hand into her mouth. It felt strange at first, but as she began to suck on them, she was surprised at how much it turned them both on.

"Oh, baby..." He moaned as his hands fumbled to remove her clothing. Then abruptly, he stopped for a moment and she glared up at him. He took his fingers from her mouth and she huffed in response.

"What?" She tried and failed to not sound exasperated.

"I don't know. Can I still call you pet names?"

She briefly remembered what she yelled at him earlier in her fit of rage and rolled her eyes. "I don't care what you call me, just fuck me, please!" She wriggled beneath him impatiently. She caught a glint in his eyes as he grinned at her before shoving his fingers back in her mouth which she took with great pleasure this time.

She may have escaped those dangerous thoughts for the mean time, but they still sat in the back of her mind, dark and brooding. From one extreme emotion to the next, she hadn't seen either side from Fun Ghoul before. Seeing that anger and fear in his eyes. Fear from hurting her; fear of the fact that protecting her means making him a target as well. She couldn't stand the thought of it and instead focused her attention on keeping quiet while her body convulsed around him from the pleasure.