Hope Is a Waking Dream
Chapter 8
Chapter 8
The longer he waited for her to get back, the more anxious he got. He decided to go down to the brook, he needed to wash up, and it had been long enough to where she was probably on her way back anyway. He grabbed a set of clothes that Carol had given him yesterday and headed out. He still didn’t know what he was going to say to her, but whatever it ended up being, it was just gonna get him in more shit anyway so it probably didn’t matter. It was a good thing that Daryl had such a good memory and sense of direction, because his thoughts had turned to what had happened yesterday, and not the walker part. He hadn’t passed her yet and the thought that she might still be down there, naked, was occurring to him. As he got closer, though, he tried to clear his mind, be more focused. If there had been one walker yesterday, there could be another or more today. When he got close enough to hear the rippling water of the brook, he heard something else too. It didn’t sound like any walker he’d ever heard. It sounded like singing.
When she got to the brook, she was beyond pissed, but she didn’t know who she was more pissed at, Daryl or herself. She had told him more this morning than she had ever told those state psychologists. She felt so stupid for that. He was being nice to her and she had, incorrectly, assumed it was because he was a nice guy. He had revealed as much to her and now she was thinking that it had all been lies. He’s just trying to ease the difficulty of being with new people. He was doing it for them, those damn people who had taken her solitude. She quickly undressed and stepped into the water. She stayed more alert this time; she didn’t want Daryl to waste his time or energy saving her worthless ass. This is what happens; this is why she should’ve never let her guard down. Goddamn that stupid hick, she thought. When she felt she was clean enough, she stepped out and took her clothes from the rock where she had left them. After she was dressed, she grabbed her knife and put it in her lap. She didn’t want to go back to the cabin now, so she just sat on the rock and kept dwelling on what had happened. He smirked when he said it. Maybe he was just joking. If that was a joke, he sucks at it. She continued to sit there, stewing over it for God knows how long when a random thought struck her. She remembered a song her mom had sung to her when she was a little girl. A song she had not heard or thought of since she died and Melissa began to hum. Eventually, the words poured from her mouth.
He stood still and quiet, listening to the words and the voice. He hadn’t heard that song since he was a little boy. His momma would sing it to him on nights his father had left in a drunken stupor after having beat the shit out of one or both of them. He fought those memories with everything he had. He’d heard about some people being able to block out bad memories, but he never could. The song mainly made him think of his mamma. The most beautiful woman he’d ever seen. He could still remember her long, black hair shining in the moonlight through his window on those nights. He was entranced by the voice that was as beautiful as his momma’s was. He took a few steps and through the clearing, he saw her sitting on the rock. He was too captivated by the scene in front of him to be relieved that she was fully dressed. When the song stopped, he stepped forward. “You got a real pretty voice,” he said shyly.
“Holy shit! You scared the hell outta me!” she exclaimed, jumping of the rock and dropping the knife that was on her lap. “Good Lord, God himself wouldn’t know you were coming!”
“Sorry. I didn’t want to interrupt you. It sounded nice,” he said and looked directly into her eyes.
She cleared her throat, “Thanks,” and quickly picked up her knife. She had to get out of there, now. As she walked passed Daryl, his arm shot out and he grabbed her by the wrist stopping her. “I’m sorry for what I said. I know it sounded bad, but I didn’t mean it the way you took it. I’m not good with people either. I’m sorry.”
He had this hangdog look on his face. Maybe he’s a good liar, but he’s a shit actor. She could see genuine remorse in those beautiful blue eyes. “You don’t have to apologize. I’m not gonna kick ya’ll out just ‘cause you put your foot in your mouth. Ya’ll can still stay.”
“I ain’t apologizing for them. I had a good time hunting with you this morning and I didn’t want to ruin it. Didn’t mean to piss you off. I’m sorry.”
“You can stop saying that. I understand that you regret what you said, but you don’t have to. I’m the one who took it wrong. It’s half my fault, okay?”
“Okay.” He accepted that. He didn’t want to start an argument. “I want to talk to ya about that run tomorrow. Stay here, we can talk while I wash.”
“You sure about that?” she said surprised.
“Yeah. You can watch my back. Maybe you’ll have to save my life this time.” He smiled and let go of her, walking to the brook.
“Sure,” she said a little apprehensive. “I’ll just face the trees and give ya some privacy.” She sat back down on the rock with her back toward the water. She could hear him moving behind her, could hear his zipper as he took off his pants.
“I’s thinking that since you know your way around, you could go with us on the run.”
“Why do you want me to go?”
“Just told ya dumbass. Anyway, Rick ain’t’ going. He’s gonna stay back and keep watch, protect the group.” She could hear him in the water now. “It’s gonna be Glenn, Maggie, me and you. That’s if you’re willing to go.”
“Okay. I’ll go. At least it’ll keep ya’ll from getting lost.” She heard him laugh.
“You’re probably right. Nobody know this place better than you do, huh? Maybe you’ll end up saving all our asses tomorrow,” he said and stepped out of the brook. His eyes had never left her form sitting on that rock. He never turned his back to her, not knowing if he could trust her not to sneak a peek. By the time he had finished though, his doubts about her were gone. She had dutifully sat on that rock, watching the tree line with her knife by her side at the ready. She hadn’t as much as turned her head in his direction, for which he was grateful. He didn’t imagine she’d be interested in looking anyway. “You can turn around now,” he said once he was fully dressed.
Her mind flipped when she saw him. His hair was dripping wet and his clothes stuck to his still wet body. Her mouth suddenly went dryer than a desert. “Maybe I will save ya’ll lives. It seems that I owe ya one.”
“I already told ya once, ya don’t owe me shit. Don’t want nothing from ya if it’s just ‘cause ya think its owed. I’d rather die if it only means that much to ya.”
No! That’s not what I meant!” she said desperately trying to fix her fuck up. “I just meant that what you did, saving my life, meant everything to me. I want to do something that means a lot to you. I’m still trying Daryl, I really am. I wanna trust you, all of you, and I want you to trust me. I don’t know how to do either of those things.”
“I do trust you Melissa,” he said and took a step closer to her. “I’m trying too and already fucked up once today. I asked ya to go with us tomorrow ‘cause we all trust ya. I just don’t want ya to think we’re the enemy, that I’m the enemy, ‘cause I’m not. I say stupid shit. You say stupid shit. Took me a long time to be able to talk to those people. They didn’t like me much when we first met. I’s with my brother then. He was an asshole; didn’t care if anybody liked him or not. He’d do shit on purpose to make people uncomfortable. He was an addict too, high most of the time. That’s why they left him behind. They all thought I’s just like him, but I’m not, I don’t wanna be. He’s too much like our old man. They say I’ve changed since Merle’s been gone, and I guess I have. They ain’t kicked me out yet. That’s a good sign, right?”
“This is real hard for me,” she said. “I just don’t want to get hurt. I don’t want to put my trust in you and get hurt. I miss people. I don’t want to be alone no more, but being alone is what I’m good at.”
“That’s why you need to come with us tomorrow. You can see how we operate. Get to know more about us. They’re good people. None of us are gonna hurt you. When it’s time for us to move on, you can come with us. I could use someone like you to help with hunting. Two can bring back more than one. Just think about it.” He picked up his crossbow and walked off.
The longer he waited for her to get back, the more anxious he got. He decided to go down to the brook, he needed to wash up, and it had been long enough to where she was probably on her way back anyway. He grabbed a set of clothes that Carol had given him yesterday and headed out. He still didn’t know what he was going to say to her, but whatever it ended up being, it was just gonna get him in more shit anyway so it probably didn’t matter. It was a good thing that Daryl had such a good memory and sense of direction, because his thoughts had turned to what had happened yesterday, and not the walker part. He hadn’t passed her yet and the thought that she might still be down there, naked, was occurring to him. As he got closer, though, he tried to clear his mind, be more focused. If there had been one walker yesterday, there could be another or more today. When he got close enough to hear the rippling water of the brook, he heard something else too. It didn’t sound like any walker he’d ever heard. It sounded like singing.
When she got to the brook, she was beyond pissed, but she didn’t know who she was more pissed at, Daryl or herself. She had told him more this morning than she had ever told those state psychologists. She felt so stupid for that. He was being nice to her and she had, incorrectly, assumed it was because he was a nice guy. He had revealed as much to her and now she was thinking that it had all been lies. He’s just trying to ease the difficulty of being with new people. He was doing it for them, those damn people who had taken her solitude. She quickly undressed and stepped into the water. She stayed more alert this time; she didn’t want Daryl to waste his time or energy saving her worthless ass. This is what happens; this is why she should’ve never let her guard down. Goddamn that stupid hick, she thought. When she felt she was clean enough, she stepped out and took her clothes from the rock where she had left them. After she was dressed, she grabbed her knife and put it in her lap. She didn’t want to go back to the cabin now, so she just sat on the rock and kept dwelling on what had happened. He smirked when he said it. Maybe he was just joking. If that was a joke, he sucks at it. She continued to sit there, stewing over it for God knows how long when a random thought struck her. She remembered a song her mom had sung to her when she was a little girl. A song she had not heard or thought of since she died and Melissa began to hum. Eventually, the words poured from her mouth.
He stood still and quiet, listening to the words and the voice. He hadn’t heard that song since he was a little boy. His momma would sing it to him on nights his father had left in a drunken stupor after having beat the shit out of one or both of them. He fought those memories with everything he had. He’d heard about some people being able to block out bad memories, but he never could. The song mainly made him think of his mamma. The most beautiful woman he’d ever seen. He could still remember her long, black hair shining in the moonlight through his window on those nights. He was entranced by the voice that was as beautiful as his momma’s was. He took a few steps and through the clearing, he saw her sitting on the rock. He was too captivated by the scene in front of him to be relieved that she was fully dressed. When the song stopped, he stepped forward. “You got a real pretty voice,” he said shyly.
“Holy shit! You scared the hell outta me!” she exclaimed, jumping of the rock and dropping the knife that was on her lap. “Good Lord, God himself wouldn’t know you were coming!”
“Sorry. I didn’t want to interrupt you. It sounded nice,” he said and looked directly into her eyes.
She cleared her throat, “Thanks,” and quickly picked up her knife. She had to get out of there, now. As she walked passed Daryl, his arm shot out and he grabbed her by the wrist stopping her. “I’m sorry for what I said. I know it sounded bad, but I didn’t mean it the way you took it. I’m not good with people either. I’m sorry.”
He had this hangdog look on his face. Maybe he’s a good liar, but he’s a shit actor. She could see genuine remorse in those beautiful blue eyes. “You don’t have to apologize. I’m not gonna kick ya’ll out just ‘cause you put your foot in your mouth. Ya’ll can still stay.”
“I ain’t apologizing for them. I had a good time hunting with you this morning and I didn’t want to ruin it. Didn’t mean to piss you off. I’m sorry.”
“You can stop saying that. I understand that you regret what you said, but you don’t have to. I’m the one who took it wrong. It’s half my fault, okay?”
“Okay.” He accepted that. He didn’t want to start an argument. “I want to talk to ya about that run tomorrow. Stay here, we can talk while I wash.”
“You sure about that?” she said surprised.
“Yeah. You can watch my back. Maybe you’ll have to save my life this time.” He smiled and let go of her, walking to the brook.
“Sure,” she said a little apprehensive. “I’ll just face the trees and give ya some privacy.” She sat back down on the rock with her back toward the water. She could hear him moving behind her, could hear his zipper as he took off his pants.
“I’s thinking that since you know your way around, you could go with us on the run.”
“Why do you want me to go?”
“Just told ya dumbass. Anyway, Rick ain’t’ going. He’s gonna stay back and keep watch, protect the group.” She could hear him in the water now. “It’s gonna be Glenn, Maggie, me and you. That’s if you’re willing to go.”
“Okay. I’ll go. At least it’ll keep ya’ll from getting lost.” She heard him laugh.
“You’re probably right. Nobody know this place better than you do, huh? Maybe you’ll end up saving all our asses tomorrow,” he said and stepped out of the brook. His eyes had never left her form sitting on that rock. He never turned his back to her, not knowing if he could trust her not to sneak a peek. By the time he had finished though, his doubts about her were gone. She had dutifully sat on that rock, watching the tree line with her knife by her side at the ready. She hadn’t as much as turned her head in his direction, for which he was grateful. He didn’t imagine she’d be interested in looking anyway. “You can turn around now,” he said once he was fully dressed.
Her mind flipped when she saw him. His hair was dripping wet and his clothes stuck to his still wet body. Her mouth suddenly went dryer than a desert. “Maybe I will save ya’ll lives. It seems that I owe ya one.”
“I already told ya once, ya don’t owe me shit. Don’t want nothing from ya if it’s just ‘cause ya think its owed. I’d rather die if it only means that much to ya.”
No! That’s not what I meant!” she said desperately trying to fix her fuck up. “I just meant that what you did, saving my life, meant everything to me. I want to do something that means a lot to you. I’m still trying Daryl, I really am. I wanna trust you, all of you, and I want you to trust me. I don’t know how to do either of those things.”
“I do trust you Melissa,” he said and took a step closer to her. “I’m trying too and already fucked up once today. I asked ya to go with us tomorrow ‘cause we all trust ya. I just don’t want ya to think we’re the enemy, that I’m the enemy, ‘cause I’m not. I say stupid shit. You say stupid shit. Took me a long time to be able to talk to those people. They didn’t like me much when we first met. I’s with my brother then. He was an asshole; didn’t care if anybody liked him or not. He’d do shit on purpose to make people uncomfortable. He was an addict too, high most of the time. That’s why they left him behind. They all thought I’s just like him, but I’m not, I don’t wanna be. He’s too much like our old man. They say I’ve changed since Merle’s been gone, and I guess I have. They ain’t kicked me out yet. That’s a good sign, right?”
“This is real hard for me,” she said. “I just don’t want to get hurt. I don’t want to put my trust in you and get hurt. I miss people. I don’t want to be alone no more, but being alone is what I’m good at.”
“That’s why you need to come with us tomorrow. You can see how we operate. Get to know more about us. They’re good people. None of us are gonna hurt you. When it’s time for us to move on, you can come with us. I could use someone like you to help with hunting. Two can bring back more than one. Just think about it.” He picked up his crossbow and walked off.