Good Riddance

“So what was it you wanted to talk to me about?” asked Billie after we had walked for a few moments in comfortable silence, away from the school.

“Well it’s just I thought I better sort of clarify the whole parent issue” I said and bit my lip.

“What about it?” he asked, “Why you won’t let me meet them or come to your house?”

“See that’s what I mean!” I said, “It makes it sound like I’m keeping you away from them rather than them away from you”

“That made absolutely no sense Scar” said Billie with a smile.

“What I mean is that I’m not letting them met you for your sake not for theirs” I said.

“You’re not doing very well with this clarifying business Scarlett” said Billie holding me closer.

“That’s because I’m trying hard to think what I’m going to say” I said grumpily, “Basically if my parents knew about you then they wouldn’t let me see you”

There was a long pause and I searched his face for answers but it was pretty expressionless as we walked down the cold street.

“Billie?” I asked him softly, just wanting him to speak.

“It’s ridiculous, Scar” he said shortly.

“I know it is” I said, “But they wouldn’t see that way, it’s not just you it would be any boy or –'

“So you’re saying that if you went out with someone like Zach then your mother would stop you from seeing him too?” asked Billie.

I was silent because I knew I couldn’t answer that the way I’d hoped to. My mother had been pushing me to go out with Zach for ages, since I had become his dance partner because apparently he was “all the things a boy should be”. In her eyes.

“You see?” Billie asked his voice dropping to almost a whisper, “It’s not because of them, it is because of me. They think you’re too good for anyone like me”

“I don’t care what they think” I said softly, “I am with you for who you are and because I like you that way, not because of what they think or anything like that. I was merely saying that’s why I have to be careful not to make anyone too angry”

“And Zach?” asked Billie spitting the name out as if it were like poison.

“He won’t tell them, not if he values my friendship as much as I think he does” I said softly, I took his hand and was relieved when his fingers closed around mine. We had stopped walking now and were stood in the middle of the cold street, facing each other.

“Come back to mine then” I said after a minute, “Now”

“Now?” asked Billie, “Won’t your mum be in?”

“No, it’s a Thursday she goes to the local primary school to help out on a Thursday, she likes to be seen to be doing her bit for the community.” I said, “So the house will be empty”

Billie grinned down at me, “If you’re sure..?”

“Positive” I said, “And then we can go down to the secret place after school, before Zach arrives?”

“Sounds like a plan” said Billie, “What are you going to be missing this afternoon?”

“Just double games” I said and pulled a face, “What about you?”

“Biology,” he said, “We’re doing human biology at the moment so there ain’t actually much that teacher can tell me about it”

I blushed at a reference to his rather promiscuous past as we turned down a side street to get to the gated community where my house stood. It didn’t take us long to get there because we had been walking on a street that ran parallel to it before. I tapped the code into the gate and the pedestrian side opened before we entered.

“I feel too dirty to be walking down here” said Billie.

I smiled uneasily, a little scared of the curtain twitching neighbours that may be looking; I didn’t want to jeopardise what I had with Billie. We reached my house and walked up the garden path, there were beds either side of the path and my mum had recently planted tulips in them so they would grow in the spring. I stepped under the porch and digging in my coat pocket I got the key out.

My house had a Georgian front to it. It was exactly symmetrical above the porch and it had a balcony over the porch. There were two floor but each room on either side of the house mirrored the other side.

“This is my place” I said gesturing around once we had stepped out of the cold December day and into the house.

“It’s huge” said Billie looking around the hallway we were in. The stairs ran up the middle of it to the two gallery hallways above and then to different bedrooms on the side of the house.

“I’m half expecting a maid or two to come running down the stairs carrying an armful of towels” said Billie with a grin as I slipped my shoes off and put them in the rack by the front door. He copied my action and I amused myself for a moment as I looked at the rack; my converse next to his huge etnies. They looked a little out of place next to the posh boots and shoes that occupied the rest of the wooden rack.

“My room is this way” I said leading him up the stairs by the hand. I went past my parents bedroom, which was at the top of the stairs and to a door on the right side of the house at the end of the corridor.

“My room” I said with a grin as I pushed open the door. Billie walked in and gaped at it, it was probably little smaller than his room in the main part but it had the closet and an en-suite bathroom leading off it. The curtains were still closed because I had shut them yesterday before I went out to Billie’s and obviously nobody had been in to open them since.

“Wow Scar” said Billie, “It’s huge”

“It’s smaller than yours” I pointed out.

“Yeah, but it’s got less shit in it so it feels a lot bigger” he said looking around.

“It’s also got a Juliet balcony,” I said pointing over to the end of the room where a set of double doors led out onto a small balcony, “Looking over the garden to the side, but obviously it’s a little cold to be out there today”

I flopped down onto the bed on my back and patted the side of the bed next to me.

“Once you’re done gaping” I said with a blush, “Get over here”

There was a pause as Billie looked down at my with a grin, “How could I ever refuse such an offer?”

I smiled as he lay on the bed next to me and I rolled onto one elbow so I could kiss him softly. I thoroughly enjoyed being able to do this in the privacy of my own bedroom, it was nice to be in totally familiar territory. There was a sense of adrenaline about our kissing because we were somewhere which was totally forbidden and it just gave it that edge of excitement. His tongue slid into my mouth as I rolled onto my back and revelled in the feeling of his strong, warm weight above me.

I wondered about myself and about all the things that were holding me back and then I realised that they were completely insignificant. There were tiny bits of self doubt that kept me from doing what I wanted to do and from being who I wanted to be; in some respects at least. I realised in that moment that it wasn’t my desire to not be “that girl”, the one who slept with anyone is sight, that was holding me back. It was my self doubt that was holding me back, I really liked Billie and I didn’t see why I shouldn’t show it physically.

This was some breakthrough.

I started to push Billie upwards and he looked a little confused but he let me go with it and I managed to be the one half over him, my hands went to the hem of his t-shirt and with some assistance from him I managed to pull it over his head. I ran hands down his chest and my mouth searched for his lips again. I was stopped about half a second later as he got my top over my head but he made no attempt to remove my bra as well. I moved so my legs were over his and his look of surprise was quite profound but obviously he wasn’t complaining in anyway, shape or form.

My hands moved down to his jean button and that was when he broke away.

“Scarlett?” he asked, “You don’t have to do anything you know”

I stopped for a moment, the self doubt creeping back a little, “I know, but I want to”

Billie smiled at me and he sensed my discomfort so he took my face very softly in between his hands and kissed me lightly again as my blush subsided. I opened his jeans button and this time he didn’t break away as I slowly undid the zip. I had to break the kiss then to see what I was doing as I slid his jeans down, I felt extremely worried about what I was doing now but tried to shake off those feelings as we succeeded in getting his jeans off.

I slowly slid my hand past the waistband of his boxers and took hold of him, he was half hard but as I touched him that soon changed.

Biology does not prepare you for this. Your teacher lies.

I moved my hand up and down not really knowing what to do, but as soon as I started moving my hand, Billie gasped and his eyes closed quickly. I moved my hand a bit faster and I got the same sort of reaction as I did so.

“Scar.. boxers off.. if you.. want” Billie half stuttered as I moved my hand again. I almost smiled as I thought of the fact he was still being a gentleman even now. I moved his boxers off quickly not wanting to hesitate a moment longer. As I said, those little black and white drawings they give you in Biology do absolutely nothing for this.

I started to move my hand again after I had gotten over the initial shock but I sped up a little and added a small twist to my wrist on the way down which seemed to make him go a little crazy. He was breathing heavy and his head was hanging back between his shoulders because he was leant up on his elbows. I moved faster and his hips jerked up so he thrust into my fist and I was slightly taken aback but I went with it.

“Fuck Scar!” he hoarsely whispered as I went faster and then the motions of his hips became jerkier.
“Scar.. come” he couldn’t even put together a full sentence as I moved quickly three more times and then he came over my hand, with a shout of my name.

I sat there for a moment slightly shocked at what I had just done. I slid off his thighs quickly while he was still getting his breath back and went to the bathroom to wash my hands. My mind was racing and all my self doubt crept back as I over thought everything I had just done. I walked back into the bedroom to find Billie still lying on the bed but he had replaced his boxers and was waiting for me. I sat next to him and he kissed me softly.

“You are incredible” he said, “You know that?”

“Hopefully in a good way” I whispered. His powerfully passionate kiss answered my question for me and the way his hands were so soft on my waist as he ghosted them over my stomach made me completely at ease again. He sat up after a moment and I rested my head on his shoulder as we sat in the semi darkness of the bedroom.

“So what have you told your mum about tomorrow night?” asked Billie.

“I told her I was staying at Kiera’s and my mum has spoken to Kiera’s mum who lied nicely for me” I said to him with a smile.

“It’s nice that we have such lying parents” said Billie with a grin.

“The world’s best kept secret” I said with a giggle, “Does that make you feel special?”

“Quite, actually” said Billie with a smirk, “It’s nice to think that people care so much for us that they’re prepared to lie to your parents to keep us a secret”

“Now I like that” I said.

“What?” asked Billie.

“Us” I said quietly, “I like there being an us”

“Well there is definitely an us, you are amazing Scar” said Billie, “You’re sexy, smart, funny, cute, witty, English, beautiful and sarcastic, all mixed up in one”

I laughed and blushed a little, “What does being English have to do with it?”

“Adds to the aloofyallureness” he said with a smile. I giggled at his wording and I snuggled into his chest. He was so warm and comfortable. I felt myself slowly drifting off to sleep as his arm held me to him, I think he did too but I’m not quite sure.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

That was the next thing I was aware of and I opened my eyes to the sound of someone knocking on my door. I blearily realised that Billie was still lying with his arm around me and he was asleep.

“Just a minute!” I called to the person at the door, “I’m just dressing, been asleep!”

Billie woke up at my call and he looked panicked.

“Shit!” he whispered as I shot off the bed and grabbed my top of the floor and pulled it on as he tried to get his jeans back on while hopping around. I opened my walk in closet door and shoved him inside unapologetically and throwing his shirt in after him. I ran to the door and opened it to see Zach stood in the hallway.

“Oh hey Zach” I said my breathing calming a little once I was safe in the knowledge that it wasn’t my mother.

“Hey Scar” said Zach with a moody smile, “Your mums downstairs so you can’t go that way”

“What?” I asked him brightly with a false smile still stuck on my face.

“I know he’s in here,” said Zach bringing a pair of Billie’s shoes from by his side, “they were in the rack by the front door, I suggest you be more subtle in future Scar”

I took the shoes from him and said gratefully, “Thanks Zach”

“Just get him out of here and get downstairs, your mum told me to come and get you” he said. I touched his arm.

“I owe you one” I said with a smile of genuine thanks. Zach just shrugged and smile and walked away towards the stairs. Zach had been so nice to us, even though he knew about Billie, maybe he did truly care for me more than his jealously of Billie stretched. I mused on my thoughts as I turned back to the closet and opened the door to find Billie stood on the other side, now fully dressed.

“You have to go” I said to him, “We fell asleep for nearly two hours!”

“It’s because we didn’t get much sleep last night” he said bobbing his eyebrows. I shook my head and rolled my eyes.

“Not the time Billie” I said but still smiled to know I wasn’t mad, “You’ll have to go this way”

“My shoes?” he asked noticing I was holding them. I passed them to him quickly and he put them on as I walked down to the balcony leading off my bedroom.

“You have to go down the balcony and then there’s a trellis thing which you can climb down” I said as I opened the balcony door letting a rush of cold air into my room, we went out onto the balcony and I kissed him.

“Now I really do feel like Romeo” he said with a smile. I giggled as he walked to the edge.

“The code to get through the gate is 25634” I said to him, “Will you remember?”

“I think I can manage” he said with a grin. I put my finger to his lips and the kissed him softly as he climbed down the other side of the balcony.

“Scrap the plans for tonight,” he said, “I’ll see you tomorrow baby”

“I’ll pick you up” I whispered as he disappeared down past the balcony. I stayed stood there until I heard a slight thump on the wet grass and a curse, I then saw Billie pegging it back over my lawn and out onto the street. He turned and while running backwards he waved. I blew him a kiss and I saw him laugh. I watched as he ran out of sight down the road.

“Scarlett?”

I heard my mum’s voice behind me and I turned around.

“Why are you on the balcony?” she asked coming towards me.

“Just getting some fresh air” I said with a shrug as I stepped back inside and shut the balcony doors and walked back into my warm room.

“Why is your bed so unmade?” she asked.

“Must have rolled a lot in my sleep” I said and then changing the subject, “Did you have a good day today?”

She smiled at me, “Come downstairs, Zach and Sandy are here and Liz will be here in a minute and I’ll tell you”

“Alright,” I said, “I’ll just change my top and then be right down”

Mum smiled and exited my room as I thought about how many risks had been taken this afternoon and that we would have to be much more careful in the future.

***

The day after that went by quickly because I was too wrapped up in making grovelly apologies to my games teacher as to why I had missed her lesson yesterday. At the third time she started lecturing me about proper behaviour I almost told what I had been doing during her double period but I decided “giving my boyfriend a hand job” might not be the best excuse in the world.

I had dance class at lunch today rather than after school because I had asked Mandy whether I could be excused after school today, so it was at one o clock. With it being lunchtime on a wintry day all my friends decided it would be fun to come and watch me do ballet. I had to change into my tutu and block shoes but Mandy said I could do it in my t-shirt I was wearing because we were simply working on technique today – basically she couldn’t be arsed to choreograph anything new for me so she just picked holes in what I was already doing.

My friends were sat quietly in Billie’s corner because Mandy had threatened that she’d chuck them out if they got too noisy.

“I want to stretch today and then do some point work” said Mandy, “Check up your flexibility because we haven’t done it in a few weeks so first I want you to do fifty jumping jacks and then start stretch like you normally would and then I’ll push you”

I could have killed her as she counted to fifty as I did jumping jacks, she made me do them properly as well otherwise she didn’t count them and made me do them again.

“Right, stretch normally” said Mandy, I pulled my legs about making sure I was fully stretched.

“Right!” she said, “Lie down, legs up!”

I blushed crimson.

“That’s sounds like a sexual predator!” half whispered Tre and it made my blush creep up to my ears. I saw Mandy glare at him as she took hold of my heels and started to push, she didn’t do it slowly until we got to about 30 degrees to the rest of my body and then she started to do it more gently as my muscles started to notice that something was actually happening. It took a few moments longer for her to get so my knees were actually touching my nose and then she did it with each leg individually so I was in the splits each time.

“Right, up!” she said. I got to my feet gingerly and shook myself out, something I couldn’t get over was her boundless energy all the time.

“Now we’re going to do some point stretching” she said, “And don’t look at me like that, you know it’s good for you!”

I ceased my glaring and went up onto my tiptoes at first to get my feet used to it. I then slowly rose up onto point and into the blocks at the end of my shoes. My toes immediately protested but I ignored the pain as I waited for Mandy.

“Now stretching like this” she said putting her leg on the rail that ran parallel to the wall length mirror, “We’ll start here and slowly get higher”

I nodded and put mine up to, I put my head on my knee with no problem, with my arm over my head in a graceful arc.

“Up” said Mandy and I pulled my leg up so it was near my ear and turned it inwards so my foot was over my head, I held it there with my hand twisted around my knee.

“You guys are going to have amazing sex” I heard Tre say in awe before, I think, Billie thumped him. It didn’t stop me blushing crimson even because of that but Mandy chose to ignore it as she got me to straighten my knee even further.

“Right, sink to a splits and that’ll do for today, your legs’ll want a rest” said Mandy and I smiled gratefully at her. I sank into the splits out of point and then got to my feet as she walked away. I flitted over to the others in the corner.

“You are so stretchy it is unbelievable” said Jess to me.

“I’ve been dancing since I was four” I said, “I’m gonna be”

“Back flips are about my limit” said Tre.

“You can do a back flip?” I asked him.

“Sure can” he said and turning away from us he did a back flip into the middle of the studio.

“Impressive” I said, “But can you do this..?”

“Scarlett!” I heard Mandy call, “Do not hurt yourself!”

I barely paid attention as I bounced did a handspring, pushed off and then baramied out of it so I ended twisted away from Tre but still stood next to him.

“Impressive” said Tre, “But you’ve had more practice than I have, so therefore I win”

“If you say so dear” I said walking back over to Billie. He was still sat on the floor and I offered him my hand, he didn’t take it but just got to his feet anyway.

“Coming?” I asked him.

“Don’t you have to go get changed?” he asked.

“Yes foolish” I said, “You’re coming in with me”

“Am I now?” he asked.

“Yes” I nearly growled at him as the others vacated the room. We got into the cloakroom where only my stuff was and I practically pushed him into the wall as I kissed him.

“Whoa!” he said grinning down at me, “Where did this new aggressive Scarlett come from?”

I just shrugged and kissed him again but I didn’t progress any further than that while we were in the cloakroom. Well it was more that we couldn’t progress any further because one of the guys banged on the door and threatened to knock it down to preserve my virtue if we didn’t appear in five seconds.
Little did they know about what had happened yesterday...