The Last Good Thing About This Part of Town

The drive back to Julianna's house was quiet. She fell asleep curled up on the passenger's seat. Her head rested against the window on Patrick's old Glenbrook South High School sweatshirt that he had fished out of the backseat. He slipped his favorite Saves the Day CD into the player and turned the volume down; low enough to still hear but not disturb the girl sleeping in the seat beside him. He didn't know how much she actually drank, but he figured it couldn't have been more than one or two beers because she wasn't falling down drunk. But she was clearly impaired. He just hoped she would be able to get into her house without waking up her parents because he really wanted to continue hanging out with her and getting to know her, and he wanted to see where their feelings might take them. Although, maybe he was just assuming the way being around her made his head suddenly airy and his heart thump harder in his chest was mutual.

'But what does she really think of me?' Sure, they had only known each other for a week and he was not a believer in love at first sight, but none of them had scared her off yet. He took that as a good sign. Sometimes, when it is just the two of them talking, he can almost see the defensive wall she keeps around her deepest emotions and thoughts start to crumble as she gradually shares part of herself with him. At that point, he begins to think maybe he has a chance. Then, things like tonight backstage at the show and at the bar happen and he feels like she views him as just a friend like Joe or Pete. 'And what about Joe? He obviously has some personal problem, which Andy and Julianna seem privy to. So why didn't he talk to me about it?' Joe liked being around Julianna and formed a fast attachment to her, which wasn't unusual because as aloof as Joe may seem he was great at making people feel welcome and included. That is why Joe's relationship with his girlfriend was an enigma. They had been dating for nearly a year, but Patrick had only seen her a handful of times. She never came to shows, always claiming she had to work. Joe didn't seem bothered by it because that was his personality. Or the front he put on. Patrick wondered if maybe they were not fine, though.

Once he was parked in her driveway, Patrick reached over and gently shook Julianna's shoulder, "Wake up, sleepy head. We're at your house."

"Hmm?" Julianna slowly opened her eyes and sat up in the seat, grateful for the dark because her head was pounding. She pushed her hair behind her ears and wadded Patrick's hoodie in her lap then looked over at him, her eyes half-lidded.

"Come on, let's get you inside," Patrick stepped out of the car and jogged around to open her door. She accepted his outstretched hand as he did most of the work to pull her out of the car. She let the hoodie fall from her lap onto the seat and shivered in the cool October air. Patrick wrapped an arm around her shoulders, holding her close against his body for heat as they walked the short distance up the sidewalk to the door.

"Thanks for the ride. Tonight was fun," Julianna leaned into Patrick and turned to peer up at him when they stood in front of the door.

Patrick licked his lips, suddenly very aware of his sweating palms despite the chilly autumn night, but he gave a lopsided grin like she was not making his insides feel like mashed potatoes, "No problem. I had a great time, too. I'm glad you came."

"Call me sometime, ok? Good night, Patrick." Before her foggy brain could stop her or make her think about the potential consequences of her actions, Julianna lifted onto her tiptoes and pecked her lips against his cheek. Just as quickly, she disappeared inside her house.

The teenaged boy stood still on the Toews' front porch for several seconds, eyes wide, then his mind went from 'did she just do that?' to 'why did she do that?' He walked back to his car in a daze. He wanted to go to Joe's house and ask him what a kiss on the cheek meant, but he was sure Joe wasn't home yet -- if he even went home at all tonight -- and he definitely was not sober enough to have a serious conversation. Patrick knew for sure that Pete was wasted and most likely with a girl; plus, he didn't consider the twenty-one year old a trustworthy confidant when it came to talking about monogamous relationships. Straight edge Andy would be sober, but he could potentially be with a girl, too. The guys already accused him of being a buzzkill sometimes so he was not about to bother them now.

Once at home, Patrick tiptoed down the dark hall behind the living room, passing his mom's and sister's rooms before entering the room he used to share with his older brother, Kevin. He quietly shut the door, kicked off his shoes, tossed the hat off his head and collapsed onto the bed.

******

"Ok, ok, stop! Stop! White flag!" Patrick was in a fetal position on the floor of his basement with Pete's arm around his neck while Joe playfully punched him in the side and gut. All the guys were laughing hysterically, but Joe knew Patrick was quickly becoming annoyed.

"C'mon, man, you gotta tell us what happened last night," Pete gently clenched his arm around Patrick's neck, gasping out his words between giggles.

"Get off me!" Patrick pushed Joe, who fell back on the couch next to Andy, then he elbowed Pete hard in the ribs and the older man took the hint, releasing his captive. Patrick rolled away from Pete and stood up, adjusting his skewed T-shirt and jeans. Pete was still laughing as he got off the floor, too, and Patrick shot him a glare. "You're an ass."

"But seriously, what happened last night?" Andy's voice of reason broke quietly through the laughter. He pulled one of the couch pillows onto his lap then reached for the Playstation controller sitting on the coffee table in front of him. Pete turned on the video game console and TV before picking up the second Playstation controller and plopping himself sideways on the burka lounger, his legs hanging over one arm of the chair while his back rested against the other arm.

"I already told you guys nothing happened," Patrick retorted.

"Agh!" Joe tossed his head back. "That's so boring!"

"Yeah, what if, instead, you walked her to the door then grabbed her and kissed her hard on the mouth," Andy interjected, his thumbs playing over the controller in his palms.

"Then took her to bed," Pete grinned, but his attention was on the video game he was playing against Andy. Patrick punched him hard in the shoulder, and Pete busted up laughing again. Joe got off the couch, grabbed his acoustic guitar from where it was leaning against the side of the speakers and returned to the couch, his fingers lightly strumming over the strings. Patrick was perched on the arm of the chair Pete was sprawled across, watching his friends play their game.

"Did you invite her over today?" Pete asked absently. Patrick shook his head. "Why not?"

Patrick shrugged, biting his bottom lip, "I just wanted to hang out with you guys today." He knew it was a lame excuse, and the way Pete stared at him with one eyebrow raised confirmed he did not believe it either.

"Have you even called her since last night?" Joe wondered, his head still bent over the guitar across his lap.

"Guys, it wasn't a date!" Patrick protested.

"Did you drive?" Pete challenged.

"Did you get her into the show?" Joe chimed in.

"Did you walk her to the door at the end of the night?" Andy added.

"And you were the one who danced with her," Joe reminded his friend.

"Fuck off! You guys got her drunk!"

"Yeah, so we're definitely not boyfriend material," Pete joked. "Plus, you know, Joe has a girlfriend."

"Yeah, and what's the deal with that?" Patrick quickly jumped on the chance to change the subject, but Joe narrowed his eyes and shook his head at his friend. Patrick chose to back off that issue again, wondering if Joe would ever tell him what was going on between him and Lindsay. He turned his attention back to Pete, who was currently being trounced by Andy in the game they were playing. "Whatever, man. So who'd you go home with, Pete? Crazy red-haired girl from the show or the sorority girl from the bar?"

A slow grin spread across Pete's usually solemn face, "Both."

"How are you not a walking billboard for STDs?" Joe wondered aloud. Pete shrugged. The smile was gone from his face, and the rest of them knew he was done talking about himself. The remaining afternoon was spent in Patrick's basement playing Playstation and discussing the future of Arma Angelus. Tim was supposed to meet them around four, after he was done running some errands, but when he did not show up Joe called him. Tim never answered his phone, though. Joe figured he was probably out trying to schedule another gig for the band. Last night, Arma Angelus made five hundred dollars, which they split evenly, but they all knew it was going to take more than that to save up enough to rent some studio space.

Pete and Tim started the band after meeting at a record store in Chicago almost two years ago. Originally, Arma Angelus was Pete, Tim and Chris. At that time Andy was drumming for a couple metal bands in the Chicago hardcore scene, and Tim met him when Arma Angelus played on the same bill as one of Andy's bands at a small college show. He introduced the quiet, straight-edge drummer to Pete and Chris and they immediately hit it off. Shortly after that, however, Chris decided to leave the band because he was having financial trouble and he was not sure this was the path he wanted to take in life. Andy offered to be their fill-in drummer until they found a replacement, then the bands he had been playing in fell apart so Tim and Pete decided to ask him to stay on as the full-time drummer. Andy accepted and officially moved out of his mom's house in Menomonee Falls, Wisconsin and moved into Pete's apartment in Wilmette, Illinois. Arma Angelus played a couple small gigs in Chicago as a trio, but they still thought their sound could be improved with another guitar player, and that would allow Tim to sing and play rhythm guitar rather than having to remember all of Pete's lyrics plus play the lead guitar part.

The band auditioned three or four guys but none of them gelled with Tim, Pete and Andy, but then Pete met Joe and he fit in seamlessly. For the past year, the band had been solely working on establishing themselves in the hardcore scene; writing songs and cementing their set list. Now, they had five complete, final draft songs, as Tim called them, and about five more that needed some work but could be show or album worthy quickly. The next step then, agreed upon by all four members of the band, was to earn enough money to be able to go into a professional studio and record an EP that would be officially distributed by a record label. Tim and Pete were doing a lot of research and public relations and meeting with producers to make this a reality on top of continuously setting up gigs for the band.

Patrick was the one Joe worried about, though. Knowing Tim's impatience and Pete's ambition to drive the band forward, Joe was sure they were not going to wait for Patrick to finish school. Even if he was willing to graduate early, Joe did not know if Tim was even willing to add another member. They didn't need a drummer, which was Patrick's first love, and Tim was not into adding keyboards or a third guitar part. He claimed it would make them sound too much like the songs played on mainstream radio.

Patrick noticed Joe staring in his direction. He was zoned out, his eyes unblinking and his hands motionless on the guitar, but when he realized he was probably creeping out his friend, Joe quickly snapped out of his daze and focused on his guitar playing again. Pete tossed his game controller aside after losing to Andy again in Mortal Kombat and stood up from the chair to pace around the room.

"Come on, let's do something," he pleaded, pushing a hand vigorously through his dark hair several times. "Let's call Julianna and go walk the tracks or...hey, Trick, does your mom have any eggs we could have?"

"No!" Patrick protested, "we are not playing that game again! I had Grade-A sized welts for days and my mom was so pissed we wasted all the eggs." Pete chuckled, his dark eyes creasing in the corners as he recalled the memory.

"Aww, was the wittle baby mad he got some bwuises," Pete pouted and teased his young friend in a baby voice, but Patrick did not find it amusing. The other two laughed, though.

"No, no, absolutely not," Patrick's hands flailed, emphasizing his point.

"What if we use marshmallows this time?" Joe suggested, his eyes widening as if he had the most brilliant idea.

"But shoot them from paintball guns," Andy added, excited to have something to do except sit around.

"Will that work?" Joe looked over at Andy and his brown eyebrows drew together in a crease between his eyes.

"Hell if I know but it would be fun to try," Andy shrugged. "Or we could ride the dirt bike around and watch Pete wipe out again."

"Do you guys really think Julianna is prepared for these shenanigans?" Patrick asked. "I mean, we do want to her stick around, right?"

"Dude, she's either gonna love us or hate us," Pete responded, "and the more she's around, the more she's going to realize this is what we do. Might as well just rip the Band-Aid off as quickly as possible."

"He's not wrong," Andy agreed.

Patrick looked to Joe for affirmation, too. His best friend just shrugged his shoulders, allowing his body language to say Pete was probably right but the decision was ultimately Patrick's to make.

"Fine," Patrick sighed. "I'll call her."

"Yes!" Pete raised his fist victorious and did a little dance in place. Sometimes Patrick forgot that Pete was five years older than him, especially when he was hyped up.

******

Some time later, as the light blue October sky became purple streaked with wisps of red-orange clouds and the full moon peeked out of the horizon while the sun went down, Julianna and the boys were walking along the abandoned tracks at the outskirts of Glenview. At one time, these rusty railroad tracks were well-used, carrying train cars full of coal, oil and grain from the southern farm country of Illinois into the northwest suburbs of Chicago. But, as the town became increasingly populated and houses began to spring up almost over night after World War II, the railway company diverted the tracks to run through downtown in order to also support the ever-growing number of passenger trains coming into town. Now, the three mile stretch of overgrown abandoned tracks surrounded by dense trees and brush has been a popular hang out of many a young adolescent in the town. Glenview Creek also ran parallel to the tracks and provided a beautiful landscape for couples wanting a private make out spot or teenagers looking to get high or large groups planning an alcohol-fueled rage without being caught by the police or their parents.

Patrick and his friends just loved to hang out, walk the tracks and fish and wade in the creek, allowing them a sense of independence from the watchful eyes or Joe's and Patrick's parents. The leaves were various shades of reds, oranges, yellows and browns, slowly letting loose of their branches to float to the ground. Winter was on its way, affirmed by the chilly bite in the air and the weaning daylight hours. Pete walked in the center of the tracks, kicking up the crunchy leaves and pulling the hood of his sweatshirt over his hair while Joe and Julianna balanced to walk on the rails, and Patrick and Andy just meandered along on either side of Pete. When Joe put his hands on Julianna's shoulders to prevent both of them from falling off the rail, Julianna shrieked then laughed because she thought Joe was trying to mess around rather than help. Patrick looked away and focused his attention on his other two friends, attempting to deny the vicious stabbing sensation in his gut. 'Where is Joe's damn girlfriend anyway, and why can't he seem to keep his hands off the one that I want to make mine?! It's not like he can't tell how I feel about her.'

"I swear to god I will throw you in the creek, Joe Trohman!" Julianna threatened when, this time, Joe did pretend to spook her from behind, his hands still gripping her shoulders.

"Oh like you can even throw me," Joe teased back, and she spun on her heels to face him, glaring.

"You don't know. Maybe I hulk out when I get angry."

Andy and Pete laughed at the reference and Joe's wide-eyed fake-scared face.

"Watch out, Joe," Andy warned, "I think she's serious!"

"Yeah, watch out, Joe," Julianna repeated, pinching his side playfully. He dodged to avoid her and ended up falling off the rail, landing on his feet on the rocky tracks. She laughed at him but reached out her hand to pull him back up onto the rail tie with her. All the while, Patrick watched their easy exchange and envied his friend's laid-back demeanor. Joe was capable of making friends with anyone if he really wanted to, whereas Patrick tended to be much more timid and suspect. Plus, he was always so worried about being socially acceptable that he couldn't just let loose like Joe.

Just then, Joe's cell phone rang in his jacket pocket.

"It's Tim," he announced, flipping the phone open and saying hello. Everyone else stopped walking and focused their attention on Joe as he stepped down off the rail tie and knitted his eyebrows together as he listened to what Tim was saying. He was only on the phone for a minute, then he looked out at his friends and repeated what he had just heard. "Tim left the band."