Catharsis

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Sasuke sat in a swing outside the Academy, his old Konoha head band clenched in his new left hand.

Crowds of parents, students and other Konoha citizens bustled around him, whispering and glaring.

He knew they weren't thrilled to have him back.

But could he really blame them?

Any halfway decent human being would be a little concerned a twenty two year old man who happened to be a deserter and a war criminal outside the school. One who had torn off their precious Hokage's hand off with his chidori.

He wasn't sure why he had come back to his old academy.

Perhaps it gave him memories of easier days, not happy days but better ones to say the least, that was probably why it was the the only place in Konoha he could stomach.

Sasuke spent most of his time wandering the world, searching for redemption and trying to find some good in the world.

After the ridiculous probationary sentence the Council had insisted upon when Kakashi had pardoned him, he had quickly taken his jonin test, passing with ease. The second they changed it in his file, he made to leave Konoha and wander, Naruto had stopped him to give his old headband back. The dobe had carried it with her all these years, knowing one day she'd get through to her best friend and rival.

That's what really pissed him off about her.

Her optimism was a scourge upon him, even in her darkest days, her hope shun with a blinding light, ready to burn away any doubt.

Sometimes you had to wade through the darkness, embrace it. He had learned that the hard way, he had felt it necessary to his survival. He had let it color him pitch black.

But the blonde haired jinchuriki challenged his very way of the ninja on a daily basis.

He looked at his headband once more, noticing something wedged behind the metal. From between the tacks on the sides of the metallic part he pulled out a piece of paper so worn it felt like cloth.

Sasuke placed the folded paper on his knee as he gently folded his headband and placed it ever so carefully in his chest pocket.

Sasuke returned his attention to the paper, what could the dobe possibly have considered worth saving all these years?

He unfolded it.

The original Team 7 photo.

Sakura's bright smile. Kakashi's sheepish eye crinkle and of course Sasuke and Naruto glaring at each other.

Sasuke grit his teeth and rose from the swing, running out of the Konoha gate as quickly as he could.

---

It seemed like every place Sasuke went, where he tried to act human and learn how to hold a conversation with another human being, when said subject of his experiments found out he was from Konoha they would always ask about the dobe.

The girl who was once deadlast and hated throughout her own home village was now beloved across the world.

People smiled and their eyes lit up at the mention of her name or her exploits.

And he, who had once been beloved and popular was now the very opposite.

Sasuke could never use his own name, without a fight breaking out, he always used a fake name lest we hurt some lesser nin or civilian and his freedom was revoked and he was forced back to that cage they called a village.

The frustration and anger she spurred in him was visceral, in his gut, burning and twisting its way through him.

His memories drifted to their last fight in the Valley of the End while his feet carried him to his next destination.

Right before their last battle he had told her that he wanted to be Hokage, that he would create a better world but not before tearing the old one down. He would better the world, no matter how much blood was spilled or how many lives were destroyed.

Yet, here was his rival, completing his exact goal, with not a drop of blood.

There were posters in every inch of the world he walked. Her smiling face, asking the reader to join with the Allied Shinobi Forces.

It was impossible not to notice the damned things everywhere, the bright orange of her sweater, her giant blue eyes and big white grin.

Every poster he saw stoked the flames of his resentment even more.

---

Sasuke returned a few years later, healed a bit more, he attempted to walk through the village. He almost made it too until he came upon the Uchiha compound.

He gripped the rusted old fence with his hands, it looked terrible. The paint was chipping, shingles were falling off, the grounds were an over grown nightmare and there looked to be extensive water damage.

Betrayal sparked in his chest, he had half-expected the dobe to keep it nice for him, expecting him to come home one day.

Isn't that what she did? Give him hope?

The thing was, the one time he expected it, his hopes were shattered like glass.

He looked on at the dilapidated remains of his childhood home with a sadness we hadn't felt since the day he had found his clan dead.

Sadness was a different feeling that anger. Anger was an emotion to which he was accustomed. Sadness though seemed to hurt worse, while it didn't burn as bright, it lingered and pulsated through his body. Sasuke placed his forehead on the fence and closed his eyes, trying to compose himself.

"Uchiha-san," a voice greeted from behind him. Sasuke turned around to see a grown up Konohamaru, sporting a beard like his uncle Asuma and wearing a jonin vest over his clothing, "The Hokage would like an audience with you."

Sasuke nodded and looked up at the Hokage monument, they had finally gotten her face up there, next to Kakashi's, they even had her whisker markings carved in, "Okay."

Sasuke walked next to Konohamaru during their walk, the younger nin sneaking glances at Sasuke's face. The boy had at least matured enough to know not to attempt any form of conversation with him.

They reached the office rather quickly but the anxiety Sasuke felt made his heart beat erratically, his heart pounding in his throat, making it hard to breathe. Every step felt like he was walking to the gallows. How could he see this person who had done nothing but chase after him, determined to save him from himself? This person who had accomplished so very much at the young age of 25 when he, who had been expected to be the over-achiever, had done nothing.

The man who wandered the land for years suddenly found it hard to step forward.

"Come on, teme, get your ass in here!" Naruto yelled, though her voice seemed a bit distorted.

Sasuke took a deep breath and pushed open her office door. Sasuke walked in followed by Konohamaru.

There she was.

Though wearing her Hokage hat and robe she sat with her feet on her desk, a bowl of ramen in her lap. Sunlight streamed in through the window behind her, casting her in a heavenly glow.

She glared at assistant, "Took ya long enough to get him."

Konohamaru crossed his arms and huffed, "Maybe if your instructions were a little more specific, hokage-same, how was I supposed to find him when all you said was 'Teme's back, can ya grab him for me?'"

Naruto stuck her tongue out at Konohamaru, "Don't make me rasengan you, otouto, believe it!"

"I'll rasengan you right back!" Konohamaru stuck out his own tongue, "You shouldn'ta taught me how to do it, onii-chan!"

Sasuke coughed and the two stopped.

Naruto waved Konohamaru off and the kid left, she then spun around to sit right, gesturing Sasuke to sit and folded her hands on her desk, when Sasuke sat she smiled, "Well teme, how's the vagabond life treating you?"

Sasuke shrugged, not breaking eye contact, "Well, I suppose."

Her blue eyes were warm and kind, just like all those time she chased after him, "I understand Sasuke, this wandering you're doing, Sakura-chan says you've got something called post traumatic stress disorder and you'll probably have it the rest of your life. With everything you've suffered, she says what you're doing is a completely normal response, that somewhere inside of you is convinced it's not safe to stay in one place. But the council is very nervous, they're convinced you'll turn rogue again. Sakura-chan and I are fighting them on this and hard, believe it, we're doing our best but they've got the support of the villagers, they want you to stay in town."

Sasuke stuggled to breathe, anger twisting and curling up inside of him, waiting to explode like steam from a kettle. He pounded his fist down on her desk, "And where do they want me to stay? You've let my house fall to ruin!"

Naruto shook her head, looking hurt, "There was a bad storm last year, we saved all of your stuff, it's at my apartment."

"Shut up!" Sasuke screamed, "I'm tired of this! I don't believe you! You act like you care but you don't, you two have these perfect little lives, you've moved on, you've forgotten about me!"

Naruto got up so quickly Sasuke almost didn't see her, she rounded the table and stood on her tippy toes getting in his face, blue fire raged in her eyes, "How dare you teme? You ungrateful asshole! Everything Sakura-chan and I have done since you left us when we were twelve is to get you back home safely, but no! It's only your goals and your endgame that matters! You don't give two shits about us or Kakashi-sensei! It's you whose forgotten about us."

Sasuke grabbed her shoulders and shook her, "Seriously, you imbecile? How could I ever forget you, your damned whiskered face is on every fucking wall across the world, your name on every shinobi and civilian's lips. I have no escape from you! No reprieve! Everywhere I look is you! I can' t escape you! I feel like I'm suffocating, must you haunt me? Must you follow me everywhere? Must you rub your success in my face, dobe?"

She grit her teeth, "Oh, my success?"

"Yes," Sasuke shoved her away from him and gestured around the office, "You got the office, the robes, your damn whiskers up on the hokage monument! Your changing the world and you just turned 25 last week!"

Naruto got in his face again, a sneer on her face, "Teme, maybe if you stopped running away, maybe if you faced these issues you have, you wouldn't feel this way! I'm trying to help you! I've done it for years! Defended you from people, dedicated myself to saving your pitch black soul from whatever bottomless pit of despair and anger is inside of you! How long do I have to give you to heal? Will you ever? Will we have this conversation every 8 years until we're elderly and too frail to yell?"

Sasuke grabbed her by her obnoxiously orange collar and kissed her.

It wasn't sweet, it wasn't loving.

It was desperate and hard.

Sasuke didn't know what kind of emotional vacuum he had inside of him until he kissed her. Everything, all of him bubbled to the surface, all of his anger and pain he let into the kiss. His new hand left her collar to trace the whisker marks on her face, they were as smooth as her tan skin.

As quickly as the moment came, it went.

They shoved away from each other and stared at each other in suspicion, wiping their mouths with the backs of their new hands.

Blue clashed with black.

Sasuke blinked, both his sharingan and rinnegan had activated during the kiss without him knowing.

He closed his eye, deep breathing, until they deactivated.

Sasuke met the jinchuriki's eyes once more.

For the first time in the thirteen years he had known her, she was quiet. No look of determination, no rambunctious smile, no sheepish grin or snoring face.

She was as blank as him.

A shiver ran down Sasuke's spine, leaving him as cold as ice water. Sasuke turned and left, Konohamaru on the other side of the door, "It was nice seeing you, Sasuke-san."

But the younger shinobi must have seen the look on his Hokage's face and ran past Sasuke into Naruto's office, "Onii-chan!"

Sasuke looked back once last time, at the uncharacteristic frown on Naruto's face.

Sasuke ran for the Konoha gate.

Just as he slipped past the chunin watching the gate, someone grabbed his left hand and yanked him back.

Sasuke looked back to see Naruto's determined face, "What are you doing?"

"Isn't this what we do?" Naruto grinned, "You run away and I bring you back?"

Sasuke felt a small smile start to form on his face, he went to touch it but Naruto's hand still gripped it tight.

He looked from their joined hands back to her face, "Why?"

"Who knows what kind of trouble you would get into if I wasn't here to say your ass, teme?"