Words You Wouldn't Say

Max couldn't help it when he yawned for the third time as they walked up the driveway toward Mike's parents' front door, Otis on his hip.

Mike chuckled softly, slipping his hand into Max's. "Stop yawning, Max, that's disrespectful." Max snorted softly.

"You shouldn't have kept me up so late, then." Mike laughed at that, eyes scrunching as they stepped up to the door and he rang the doorbell. "Honestly, you knew we had to be here early..."

"Are you saying I shouldn't have done that thing with my tongue -"

"No, I am not saying that, you should do that thing with your tongue every time." Mike laughed obnoxiously, trying to school his features into a serious expression and failing. Max smiled, watching as he nearly doubled over, trying to cut back on his laughter. As the door began to open, he stood straight, and Max whispered, "I mean it, too."

Mike snorted a little and managed to keep a straight face as his mother opened the door and smiled at them. "My boys," she said, and Max couldn't help his soft smile. He'd always loved Mike's mom, and she'd always been very fond of him, always saying he was too skinny even when he was on the baseball team and scarfing down more food than both of her sons combined. She took one look at their connected hands and smiled knowingly, letting them in with ease.

Otis reached for her almost instantly and she took him, smiling and cooing at him. Max pulled the sleeves on his ugly Christmas sweater - a gift from Talinda - further down his arms, stepping inside and smiling as Mike's father called out to him.

"It's been too long since we saw you last!" Max smiled slightly. "You were such a good baseball player. Jason never stopped talking about you!"

"Dad," Jason mumbled. Max smiled wide when Mike's brother walked into view, the tips of his ears turning red.

"Hey Jason," he said, grinning when Jason couldn't quite meet his eyes. "Is that how you treat your best friend for ever?" Jason groaned and walked over, hugging Max briefly.

"I knew you were all going to be embarassing," he mumbled as he pulled away, jerking his head backwards. "That's my girlfriend, Stacey." He glanced back at her and Max followed his gaze, finding a blonde with her hair pulled into a tight ponytail and glasses that framed wide eyes. She smiled and waved.

"Hi, I'm Stacey. You must be Max." His eyebrows raised.

"Does Jason talk about me often?" he asked, grinning when Jason's ears turned a deeper shade of red.

"They all do, really," Stacey said with an awkward smile. "You'd think you were their estranged son, as wistfully and as often as they talked about you." She shot a pointed look at Mike and Max couldn't help his grin, turning to catch the expression on Mike's face. Mike looked away, whistling.

"What's this?" Mike's mother asked, grabbing Max's left hand. Max looked down at it, then smiled, his heart melting all over again. "So you are our estranged son, then?"

"Just about," Max joked, staring down at his ring. Warmth flooded through him; he'd forgotten how good it felt to be surrounded by Mike's family. Mike's mother led him into the living room and Jason followed with Stacey a few steps behind as Mike hung back to talk to his father. Otis shrieked when he saw a slightly older kid playing with a toy on the floor, and Max gave Jason a questioning look as Mike's mother set the baby down to play as well.

Jason gave him a sheepish look. "It's a long story."

"Been there, done that," Max said jokingly. "Sixteen years of that, actually." Jason chuckled.

"Yeah, your story is infinitely longer than mine." Max smiled and sat on the couch.

"This is an adorable sweater," Mike's mother said, rubbing the sleeve of Max's ugly sweater. Max flinched away automatically and pulled his arms inward, staring down.

"Ma," he heard Mike call softly.

"Sorry, sorry," she said quickly, patting her cheeks. "I'm a forgetful old lady, I'm sorry." She smiled soothingly. "Do you want some cookies, dear?"

"I'd love some," Max responded swiftly, glancing up at her. She patted his hand and walked into the kitchen. Max looked back down at his hands, rubbing the scar that the knife had left there. He swallowed.

"Well," Jason said. "I feel so out of the loop." Max smiled bitterly and looked up.

"It's not a loop that will help you sleep at night," he said. Jason held out his hands in a placating gesture and Max looked around, glancing at Mike, who was speaking quietly to his father. Max bit his lip and pulled out his phone, idly scrolling through twitter as he waited for Mike's mother to bring the cookies back.

He'd decided that he actually liked twitter. Mike's fans sent him nice things sometimes, and sometimes he answered their questions about the keyboardist. His favorite kinds of fans were the fan-girls, because they got adorable when he responded to them and incredibly personal early in the morning.

He looked up and smiled when Mike's mother came back with cookies and a glass of milk, reaching for them. The sleeves on his oversized sweater fell down his arms, exposing his scars, and he heard a sound of surprise come from the direction of where Jason and Stacey were sitting. He set his cookies down in his lap and pulled his sweater down quickly, sparing a glance at the two to find Stacey staring at Jason and Jason staring at his lap.

Max swallowed and looked away, glancing up when Mike stepped over, hand brushing over Max's wrist gently before he sat next to him on the couch. Max leaned into his familiar presence, nibbling at the cookie as Mike took one and stuffed half of it into his mouth. Max laughed softly, watching him as he made a face as if he'd tasted the best cookie in his life.

"I missed your cookies, Ma," he said after he swallowed, taking Max's glass of milk and sipping at it.

"They're really good," Max confirmed, giving Otis a bite when he walked over to investigate. Otis reached for the rest of the cookie and Max smiled, giving it to him. Once he'd finished, Max let him sip the milk before he ran off to play with his cousin again.

"Lunch is almost ready," Max heard Mike's father call. He stood.

"Why don't I set the table?"

"Don't be silly," Mike's mother scolded. "You're a guest."

"But I'm already standing," he said with a wink, slipping towards the dining room.

"Jason," he heard Mike's mother say. "Go help him." Jason followed him into the dining room, grabbing the utensils as Max grabbed the plates. They set the table in silence for a few seconds, and then Jason took a breath, ready to say what was on his mind.

"What happened?" he asked. Max glanced down at his arms.

"The scorned lover of the man who tried to kill me tried to kill me again," he said, glancing up at Jason. Shock registered on his face.

"Oh, I - " he swallowed.

"Thought I did it to myself?" Max finished for him, finishing setting the plates down on the table. Jason looked down, guilt flashing on his face. "I'm not sure which would be worse." He leaned against the table as Jason continued setting the table.

"I thought it might have been because of Mike," he said, not meeting Max's eyes. "What he did was fucking shitty."

Max smiled and pinched Jason's cheek as he passed, causing the other to duck away and send him a quick glare. "Do you still have a crush on me, Jason?" His face went dark and Max grinned. "You were kind of awful at hiding it in high school."

"Well you were around all the time," he muttered. Max laughed softly. "I don't have to have a crush on you to acknowledge that my brother was kind of a dick for leaving you when you needed him." He looked up at Max, biting his lip. "I never understood why you didn't stay. Mom and Dad would've..."

"I know," Max said softly, eyes going unfocused. "But I needed to take care of myself." After a second he smiled. "Besides, I would've been vulnerable, and how could I trust you not to take advantage of me?" Jason laughed, shaking his head.

"Things sure would be a lot different if it would've been me and not Mike, right?" Max smiled, feeling kind of awkward at the turn the conversation had taken. His left hand flexed in and out of a fist.

"Yeah, it would've." He looked up and smiled when Mike walked into the dining room, taking Max's hips and pressing a kiss to his forehead. Jason excused himself and Mike watched him briefly before turning to Max.

"Still has a crush on you?"

"Yep." Mike chuckled softly and kissed Max's cheek.

"Ma's really sorry, about what she did."

"It's just a sensitive area," Max whispered. "It's okay."

"It's not," Mike said. "I told her repeatedly to be careful, since you'd just got the bandages off..." Max headbutted him gently.

"It is," he argued. "I'm not a china doll, Mike, I'll be okay. I've just got to get used to people touching me again. Everybody on tour is so careful to give me personal space. If it's not you, it doesn't feel right." Max could feel Mike's hands shift on his hips. Mike nodded in concession. "But it's also made me realize you touch me a lot." Mike's eyes met his and he smiled. "Little touches, like your fingers brush my hand on your way out of the room, or you brush shoulders with me when we're getting ready in the morning, or you lean into me a little just to remind me that you're there, that this is real." He closed his eyes, smiling softly.

"I love you," Mike whispered.

"I know," Max responded simply. Mike laughed, pulling away and pushing Max lightly.

"Get out of here, nerd," he said, laughing.

"You're the only reason I watched those movies!" Max said, laughing himself, calling after Mike as he walked out of the dining room. "Six hours of light saber noises when I should've been studying for my Chem test!"

Mike turned back to him and winked and Max's face flushed red. "Best six hours of your life, Maxy," he said with a kissy face, laughing when Max crossed his arms, a pout pulling on his lips unintentionally.

"Get a room," Jason mumbled.

"Good idea," Mike said. "C'mon, Max."

"Michael!" Mike's mother responded, aghast. Max couldn't help his little giggle in response, but Mike just winked at his mother and took Max's hand, pulling him down the hallway. Max's giggle turned into a full on laugh, and he let Mike lead him into his old bedroom, which almost hadn't changed at all. Max sat on the edge of the bed, still laughing, and Mike grinned, cupping his face and kissing him until he didn't have any breath left.

"You're gonna get us in trouble with your mom," Max whispered, smiling against Mike's lips. Mike chuckled softly.

"What's she gonna do, ground me?" Max laughed and Mike kissed him again. "I just wanted to bother Jason," he said as he pulled away, smiling. "We can go back now." Max smiled and looked around the room before standing and nodding.

"Okay," he said with a nod. They left the room slowly, shoulders brushing together, and Otis called out to Max as they entered the living room, holding onto one of the wrapped presents from under the tree.

"No, Otis, you've got to wait," he said patiently, taking the present and placing it under the tree. "We've got to eat first." He pouted and Max gave him a stern look. "You can't open presents until you eat all your vegetables. Otherwise Santa will come back and give you coal."

Otis stared at him for a few seconds before turning around and going to play with another toy. Max chuckled softly and sat on the floor to keep an eye on him, listening to everyone talk around him. His eyes caught on the ring on his own finger and he smiled contently, closing his eyes and listening to the hum around him.

This was home.