Sequel: Everything After
Status: Life in Progress

Notes on Heartbreak

Low

When you hit rock bottom you will know. You will feel yourself slowly slip away, any previous cares that you once had totally disappearing. You feared this moment, the moment that you succumb to the sadness that has been eating you from the inside out. The very moment in which you allow the darkness to win, the depression, the misery, it takes you over and begins to effect every second of your life. Sad thoughts will fill your head to the point of physical pain. Your chest will feel tight but empty, your body totally and completely numb. Somewhere in your mind you feel sadness, yet everything else feels nothing. You will give in to dark temptations; the sleeping pills in your kitchen cabinet, the cigarettes that lay underneath your bed, the scary thoughts that creep in the back edges of your mind. Now, not only have you lost the one you loved, but you have lost yourself and that is far worse. You want to sink inside of yourself. You feel as though your eyes are rolling backwards into your thought-filled head, every other part of your body folding together as well. You will feel depressed and you will finally understand what others before you have endured. You will wonder how it is possible to ever get through it, to survive it, to persevere. More so, you will wonder how you got here, how every thing has gone to shit and you want to die. No one can understand what is living inside of you, the darkness and fogginess and the desire to fall asleep and never wake up. How can one person make you feel so low? It may have taken one person to put you in this position, but it also only takes one person to pull yourself out of it- yourself.