Sequel: Everything After ›
Status: Life in Progress
Notes on Heartbreak
6 months later
Does she know your middle name? Does she know the names of the girls you've kissed and all your relationships up to me? Did you tell her about your parents, that sadness you keep tucked away? Has she realized how much you love to sleep? It might just be your favorite thing to do and you may quite possibly have narcolepsy. Does she get annoyed when you don't shave like I did? Do you have inside jokes? Random lingo or words that you always used when talking or texting? Do you call her baby, does she call you pet names? What are your conversations like? I wonder if she tells you how handsome you are? I could never tell you enough. Its so cliche but I could look at you for days, you were perfect in every way. I never thought I would or could get better, I never wanted to. Does she give you a hard time about doing homework and being nice to people? I know how much potential you have and I used to think I brought out the best in you as a person. Has she met your siblings? Your dog? Do you ever kiss her in that special way you'd kiss me only if you wanted something or wanted to communicate to me how much you loved me? Its like I was being sucked in, like you were somehow lifting me up through a kiss and I never wanted to be put down. Everything froze. Do you do that to her? Does she make you laugh? Does she make you forget about me???
Does she know that you came to my house today, that you talked to my mom again for the first time in six months today? Did you tell her you were going to scoop me up in your arms and lay me on your lap, kissing me for the first time in two months? I wonder if you told her that I fit perfectly between your arm and your chest, like Im meant to lay there forever, our bodies molded together like yin and yang. Does she know that when I look in your eyes and you look in mine, when we smile or laugh, that I can still feel so much between us? Do you feel that too? I can see the knowing in your eyes, you can't hide it. You know everything we ever felt is still there. Do you tell her how comfortable we are together? How we make each other constantly laugh, making fun of each other, tickling each other, i feel fully clothed with nothing on. Does she know we're meant to be together? I know this is true, and I think you do too. Its been six months and yet we still go about this game of back and forth. Six months and you're still the one Im thinking about. Six months and you're still the one I want and that I believe Ill go back to in another six months from now. You will always be my go to, my fall back, my constant. I thought when we broke up that that had ended, that I had lost that, but I now realize how emphasized it is. We can go weeks without talking, no communication whatsoever, yet when Im with you its like nothing changed, and we always find our way back. Does she know that she means nothing compared to that? If she doesn't, Im sure she will.
Does she know that you came to my house today, that you talked to my mom again for the first time in six months today? Did you tell her you were going to scoop me up in your arms and lay me on your lap, kissing me for the first time in two months? I wonder if you told her that I fit perfectly between your arm and your chest, like Im meant to lay there forever, our bodies molded together like yin and yang. Does she know that when I look in your eyes and you look in mine, when we smile or laugh, that I can still feel so much between us? Do you feel that too? I can see the knowing in your eyes, you can't hide it. You know everything we ever felt is still there. Do you tell her how comfortable we are together? How we make each other constantly laugh, making fun of each other, tickling each other, i feel fully clothed with nothing on. Does she know we're meant to be together? I know this is true, and I think you do too. Its been six months and yet we still go about this game of back and forth. Six months and you're still the one Im thinking about. Six months and you're still the one I want and that I believe Ill go back to in another six months from now. You will always be my go to, my fall back, my constant. I thought when we broke up that that had ended, that I had lost that, but I now realize how emphasized it is. We can go weeks without talking, no communication whatsoever, yet when Im with you its like nothing changed, and we always find our way back. Does she know that she means nothing compared to that? If she doesn't, Im sure she will.