Nebulous

Ethereal

Lila seemed to be dreaming more. At least, she could remember more of her dreams than she ever used to be able to. The brightness of them caused her to experience fear and panic she had never known before. Everything about the dreams felt real, everything in sharp edges and low sounds that shot terror straight to her core.

She would wake up alone in the dark, shivering and crying and wishing for things just to go back to how they used to be. She wanted her life back. Reality was slipping through her fingers, her days filled with the memories of those nightmares. There was something so real about them that she couldn’t just push them out of her mind. They lingered like a bad taste in her mouth.

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She told Dr. Summers about her dreams, but all she got was more reminders that they weren’t real, that she just needed to keep pushing forward, keep bringing normalcy to her life. It was all more of the same and it didn’t bring her any comfort.

Evan listened to her though. He didn’t offer up advice or suggestions, merely wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close, making her feel less alone.

She let him take her to his bed, let him undress her and caress her bare skin, returning warmth to her body. And she pulled him closer, pulled him flush against her, wanting to ground herself in this moment, let the reality sink in.

Lila was losing herself and she had put her hope in Evan. Hoped he would keep her from disappearing completely.

It was after, when they were laying in his bed, moonlight casting an ethereal glow about the room that he mentioned the idea of aliens.

“Aliens?” Lila said with a laugh. He laughed too.

“I know,” he said. “But I just couldn’t think of any other explanation for strange lights in the sky. Sounds like a UFO.”

“Well no one even remembers these lights,” she said. “People usually remember UFOs.”

She got home later that night, finding her mom waiting up for her.

“Where have you been?” her mother questioned. She sounded upset.

“I was just with Evan,” Lila answered. “You didn’t have to wait up.”

Her mother moved towards her suddenly, wrapping her arms around Lila and pulling her close. Lila could feel her mother relax against her, exhaling loudly.

“I’m sorry,” her mother mumbled. “It’s just the first time you’ve gone out for so long… I just got worried.”

“It’s fine,” Lila said quietly. “Where’s dad?”

“He didn’t share my concerns,” her mother said as she pulled away, rolling her eyes. “He said you’re a grown woman and I shouldn’t worry so much.”

Lila laughed.

“He does have a point,” she responded. She kissed her mother on the cheek. “Don’t worry about me, Mom. I’ll be fine.”

She went up to her room, glancing at her bed, considered climbing into it and burying herself under blankets. But there was the fear of those dreams. She didn’t want to put up with them right away.

Instead she picked up her computer and made her way to her desk, pushing stuff aside so she could set her laptop down. She sat down with a sigh, and started it up, thinking she was crazy if she was really going to look into this.

As soon as her computer was ready and she had Google open yet again, she typed in her search: alien abductions.

She was shaking her head as she waited for the page to load, but really what was looking at this going to hurt. She had no other explanation for those lights and she had no idea where else to look.

She scrolled through the results, opening a few of the links, but it was all more of the same: descriptions of abductions that they remembered in distinct clarity, pictures of lights in the sky that were nothing like what she had seen. It was another dead end and though she had known that this would be the case, she still felt let down.

Lila was about to shut her computer down when she remembered a blog she used to update when she was in middle school, when that was the cool thing to do. There she had shared her secrets and life happenings, putting her thoughts on the internet. She was sure no one had read the blog, but thinking about it now… It didn’t seem like a bad idea.

If she were to write about what had happened to her, about what she was going through, maybe someone would find the blog, someone who was going through or had gone through exactly what she was experiencing. Maybe she could find answers.

It was late when she had finally set up the blog. Her eyelids felt heavy and she couldn’t stop yawning, but it was done, the first entry posted and out there for anyone to find.

She shut down her computer and crawled into bed, pulled the blanket over her head, and greeted sleep quickly, entering the world of her dreams. Of sterile rooms and bright fluorescents, of cold air and colder fingers, of shadow figures and a kind man who tried to give her comfort despite the despair clouding his own eyes…
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Question for anyone-- does this story feel rushed or anything? I'm just concerned cause my chapters are so short!

~Sally