Nebulous
Grounded
She was starting to think that maybe she really was crazy. She stopped talking about the lights with Dr. Summers, instead opting for talking about what it felt like to be missing 6 months of memory. How empty she felt, how she was uncertain about how to pick up the pieces of her life, how to go back to normal.
“No one’s expecting you to go back to how you were before all this,” Dr. Summer’s said. “But if it’s important to you to find that bit of normalcy you thought you lost, start small. Pick something from your life from before you went missing, and reintroduce it back into your life.”
And to Lila, that sounded easy enough to do but she just wasn’t sure where to start. She figured it out though while on her way home from her apartment. She saw him walking down Main St., hands deep in his pockets to protect them from the cold. She parked the car along the curb and got out of the car, rushing up to him.
“Evan!” she called. He turned to look at her, looking a little surprised. It didn’t take long for him to grin at her and she smiled back, small and uncertain. She pointed at the coffee shop she was standing in front of. “Want to grab a coffee with me?”
“Yeah,” he said, stepping toward her cautiously. “Of course.”
When they had settled at a small table in the corner, coffee steaming in front of them, Lila became quite unsure of how to proceed. If anyone had asked her an hour ago if she would consider sitting in a café with Evan, she would say “No way” without missing a beat. But obviously something had changed. Maybe it was what Dr. Summer’s had said.
Evan had been everything normal in her life before she had gone missing. Well, up until the week before she disappeared. She had loved him, still loved him. But there was still the matter of the other woman. It hung between them, creating tension that never used to be there. Probably more so for her. It still felt fresh in her mind even though it had happened a while ago.
Despite all of this though, she wasn’t sure if she could let Evan out of her life so easily as she had dismissed him before. But now—now things were different. Lila knew she couldn’t do this on her own anymore. And sure she had her parents but they only did what they thought they had to. They didn’t have any idea what she was really going through, how hard it was to trudge through any kind of daily routine.
She wasn’t sure if Evan could really help her, making things better. All she knew is that before everything else, he had been her rock. She needed something solid and real in her life to keep her grounded. She needed him. At least, that’s what she believed, what she was now convincing herself of.
She took a sip of her coffee and finally let her eyes meet his.
“I want to tell you about the lights,” Lila said. So she told him.
“So no one seems to have any clue about these lights?” he asked when she had finished. Lila shook her head.
“And I tried to see if I could find anything online, but there’s nothing,” she said, running a hand through her hair. Her eyes started to water as the usual frustration began to creep up on her. “I feel like I’m going crazy trying to figure it out. I have no idea what happened to me, where I was, and the only thing I remember everyone else has forgotten. I know those lights were real. I’m certain of it.”
“I believe you,” he said, reaching a hand out and placing it on top of one of hers. “I didn’t see these lights and I didn’t hear anything about them, but I believe you.”
Lila pulled her hand from his and placed her palms against her eyes letting out a sigh.
“Thank you,” she finally mumbled.
“For what?”
“For believing me,” she said. Her hands fell back to the table, her fingers reaching for his hand that she’d abandoned on the table. “I’m glad I ran into you.”
He smiled at her.
“I’m glad you did too,” he said. His smile fell though, and he looked down for a moment before meeting her gaze again. “And I know you’re probably still sick of hearing it, but I really am sorry about before. It was the biggest fucking mistake of my life, to be honest.”
Lila shook her head.
“Forget about it,” she said. “It’s in the past. I just want to move forward.”
“No one’s expecting you to go back to how you were before all this,” Dr. Summer’s said. “But if it’s important to you to find that bit of normalcy you thought you lost, start small. Pick something from your life from before you went missing, and reintroduce it back into your life.”
And to Lila, that sounded easy enough to do but she just wasn’t sure where to start. She figured it out though while on her way home from her apartment. She saw him walking down Main St., hands deep in his pockets to protect them from the cold. She parked the car along the curb and got out of the car, rushing up to him.
“Evan!” she called. He turned to look at her, looking a little surprised. It didn’t take long for him to grin at her and she smiled back, small and uncertain. She pointed at the coffee shop she was standing in front of. “Want to grab a coffee with me?”
“Yeah,” he said, stepping toward her cautiously. “Of course.”
When they had settled at a small table in the corner, coffee steaming in front of them, Lila became quite unsure of how to proceed. If anyone had asked her an hour ago if she would consider sitting in a café with Evan, she would say “No way” without missing a beat. But obviously something had changed. Maybe it was what Dr. Summer’s had said.
Evan had been everything normal in her life before she had gone missing. Well, up until the week before she disappeared. She had loved him, still loved him. But there was still the matter of the other woman. It hung between them, creating tension that never used to be there. Probably more so for her. It still felt fresh in her mind even though it had happened a while ago.
Despite all of this though, she wasn’t sure if she could let Evan out of her life so easily as she had dismissed him before. But now—now things were different. Lila knew she couldn’t do this on her own anymore. And sure she had her parents but they only did what they thought they had to. They didn’t have any idea what she was really going through, how hard it was to trudge through any kind of daily routine.
She wasn’t sure if Evan could really help her, making things better. All she knew is that before everything else, he had been her rock. She needed something solid and real in her life to keep her grounded. She needed him. At least, that’s what she believed, what she was now convincing herself of.
She took a sip of her coffee and finally let her eyes meet his.
“I want to tell you about the lights,” Lila said. So she told him.
“So no one seems to have any clue about these lights?” he asked when she had finished. Lila shook her head.
“And I tried to see if I could find anything online, but there’s nothing,” she said, running a hand through her hair. Her eyes started to water as the usual frustration began to creep up on her. “I feel like I’m going crazy trying to figure it out. I have no idea what happened to me, where I was, and the only thing I remember everyone else has forgotten. I know those lights were real. I’m certain of it.”
“I believe you,” he said, reaching a hand out and placing it on top of one of hers. “I didn’t see these lights and I didn’t hear anything about them, but I believe you.”
Lila pulled her hand from his and placed her palms against her eyes letting out a sigh.
“Thank you,” she finally mumbled.
“For what?”
“For believing me,” she said. Her hands fell back to the table, her fingers reaching for his hand that she’d abandoned on the table. “I’m glad I ran into you.”
He smiled at her.
“I’m glad you did too,” he said. His smile fell though, and he looked down for a moment before meeting her gaze again. “And I know you’re probably still sick of hearing it, but I really am sorry about before. It was the biggest fucking mistake of my life, to be honest.”
Lila shook her head.
“Forget about it,” she said. “It’s in the past. I just want to move forward.”