Lucidicy

I just stared at my ceiling. That’s all I could do, my mind isn’t letting me sleep. After all these years…he’s real. All the elements were there, except the horse. I might go even more insane if there were a horse. Did he have wings though? I don’t think so, then again I only saw a front view of him. THEN AGAIN you don’t see dreams come to life, he could have the damn wings for all I know. More importantly, I still don’t know his name. I thought about asking him while I was out there, what was I going do? Blurt it out while he was stuck under that bike? He already thinks I’m crazy since he kept telling me to stop staring at him.
I didn’t sleep. Not at all, in fact I got up and made coffee after I knew my roommate was asleep so she didn’t ask me what happened. I’m in no mood to explain something to her I don’t even understand myself. It was getting around the time for her to get up now. That was my cue to go back in my room. Strangely enough I’m not tired. I’m too shocked.



“HELLO.” a hand waved in front of my face. A very annoyed woman with badly dyed hair like my mothers was looking at me. I must have zoned out at the front counter.

“I’m sorry.” I squeaked.

“I said my doughnut is cold.” she waved her chocolate doughnut around.

“We don’t serve them hot, they sit in the case until they’re all bought then we make more,” I pointed. She just stared at me. “But I can warm it up for you in the microwave.” I suggested.

“No I want a FRESH hot one.”

“I’m sorry but we don’t have fresh ones made for today, our cook didn’t show up yesterday to make them.”

“Then I want my money back.” She demanded.

Really lady? It’s a doughnut. I hate you so much right now I’m envisioning shoving a doughnut down your throat. Since I didn’t want to deal with her attitude I just gave her the money back. She left, with the doughnut I might add. I looked to Mr. Fitsimmons, he just shook his head.

“You haven’t talked much today.” Mr. Fitsimmons took a swig of his coffee.

“I know right, normally she’s talking your ear off.” I heard from behind me. My uncle with his salt and pepper hair and tall demeanor was standing behind me when I turned and looked. Luckily he just got back into town this morning and decided to stick out the lunch shift in the kitchen. Lunch rush was over now. That makes me even angrier at that damn lady who wanted fresh doughnuts after lunch time.

“I’m just tired.” I lied gathering the items from the table coolers under the counter. It wasn’t a good lie, this crap with my dreams and last night are messing me up. I put mayo on cookies instead of frosting, do you know how out of mind I have to be to do that? God he probably knows I work here he saw me come out of the shop last night before I helped him. My uncle Buck was having a conversation with Mr. Fitsimmons as I stacked the tins with potato salad and many other things in them like pickles and coleslaw. I tried to carry as many as I could, it’s a personal goal of mine to do it all in one trip to the fridge. I still had to go back for the last remaining tin. It was pickles and I tucked it under my arm as I wiped off the counter with a rag.
The backroom fridge was cold as usual, I don’t like to be there long so I set the tin in the fridge quickly. A loud crash ensued when I closed the door, I groaned and went back inside. Apparently I set the tin on the edge and it fell. Sliced pickles were everywhere, since I didn’t want to touch them with my bare hands I swept them up into a dustpan. I made a gagging noise when I stepped on one. I came back out to find my uncle at the register.

“Sue Ellen will you type this young mans order in, I don’t know the number to the computer.”

“Yeah that’s-” I stopped mid-sentence as I came through the doorway. It’s him, from last night. My face was engulfed with fiery hot flush.

“I already know what he wants I’ll just get to makin’ it, just ring it up” My uncle turned around and walked past me. I was left alone with him. Well, not completely Mr. Fitsimmons was sitting at the counter but I blocked him out. My heart pounded in my ears and my hands shook making my way to the register. He just looked at me with his hands in the pockets of his leather jacket.

“So uh- what’ll you ha-ave?” my voice shook.

“I’m sorry?” he leaned his head a bit closer, he didn’t hear me. Was I really that quiet?

“What did you want to order?” I tried to ask clearly and louder.

“The roast beef on rye with potato salad.” he told me he nodded his head with a slight smile.

“O-ok.” I stuttered and pressed the buttons. It’s hard to focus with his eyes on me, those big blue doe eyes I’ve remember explicitly from my dreams.

“Four ninety nine.” I told him. MAYBE he’ll pay with a card, I can look at the name. To my disdain he held out a twenty dollar bill. I took it very carefully without touching him and grabbed the change from the drawer. I gave him three fives and a penny. He shoved two fives and the penny in his pocket.

“Five dollars for helping me out last night.” he showed me the bill and tossed it in my tip jar. I could feel my eyes growing big.

“Uncle Buck is the food ready?” I turned around to not look at him anymore. “Few minutes.” My uncle called back from the kitchen. I slowly turned back to him, I smiled awkwardly and looked down. This is so intimidating, I felt the need to impress him in a way.

“Best donuts in town.” he pointed at the sign in the pie case in front of the counter. I nodded my head. “The lady I ran into outside says differently.” he said.

“The one with the ugly hat and matching lipstick?” I asked. He nodded with a smile. His smile was sincere, I could feel it, and it wasn’t forced. “She’s just hard to please.” I couldn’t help but smile at his smile. Silence passed over, just as I was about to say something he leaned over the counter towards me.

“I’m sorry if I scared you last night, you seemed little disturbed.” he apologized.

“Oh…well-“

“One roast beef sandwich and a side of potato salad.” My uncle came up from behind interrupting me, set a paper bag on the counter and walked in the back. Just ask him what his name is. Do it already. 1. 2. 3. Dammit I didn’t do it. The nameless stranger picked up the bag and folded the top to keep the heat in.

“How much is a soda?” he asked digging in his pocket.

“A dollar ninety.”

I watched him take out a five and hold it out to me. I opened the register and started shuffling out the change in my hand and held it out to him. He lightly grasped my hand in his and moved it over the tip jar. He turned over my hand as his thumb opened my fingers letting the change fall into the jar.

“Keep it,” He winked. My face flushed again, when he let go of my hand I wanted to turn away, I was probably making some ridiculous face. He picked up his bag and walked over to the Coca-Cola fridge and took out a Dr. Pepper. “I’ll come get a doughnut tomorrow.” he set his hand on the handle of the shop door.

Just as he opened the door I blurted out “I don’t work tomorrow!” why did I tell him that?

“Oh…Well maybe I’ll see you around…Sue Ellen.” my name rolled off his lips. My heart thudded. The bell above the door jingled as he stepped outside. I watched him walk down the sidewalk and across the street out of sight through the window from where I stood. How does he even know my name? That’s right, my uncle said it right in front of him. Dammit I don’t know his name.
I sighed to myself. The tip he gave me was more than the actual meal he bought. Am I really considering working tomorrow just to see HIM for five minutes? That would be a little desperate. Maybe take a detour home tonight so to say, walk by the Grand Masters Hotel around the block. I won’t go in, I just want to see if his motorcycle is there. Mystery Man, that’s what I’m going to call him until I find out his name otherwise. It’s probably not a smart idea to do it at night after I close though, in fact it’s not smart to do it at all. What can I say? He’s peeked my interest. This whole thing can’t be a coincidence.

“You look happy.” Mr. Fitsimmons voice came into my thoughts. I just poured him another cup of coffee without saying anything. Just like yesterday in almost the same routine, Mr. Fitsimmons left, I made myself something to eat, so on and so forth. It was almost one when I locked the shop door behind me. I walked up a block to the corner of the street, I peered down at the Grand Master Hotel. Just go home, don’t be stupid.
Having avoided possibly doing something stupid tonight, I walked straight home. Krista was in an intense game of Call of Duty with her boyfriend Ben in our living room. Or Ex-boyfriend, I don’t know. Sometimes I forget they’re together at times because they’ve been on and off for years. My guess is they’re together again. I waited for the both of them to notice me standing there. Ben probably couldn’t see me with his long red hair shielding his brown eyes, Krista on the other hand is just oblivious.

“Hey guys.” I said tossing my crap on the kitchen counter making extra noise.

“Sue Ellen can you toss me that water bottle?” Krista asked. I assumed she meant the one in front of me since she didn’t take her attention away from the game. I threw it towards her, she caught it and went back to playing her game. Hello to you too I guess? I called Bens name, he didn’t respond.

“Hey Ben.” I said a bit louder.

“Hey Sue Ellen.” he replied pausing the game.

“HEY!” Krista whined. Ben walked through the kitchen and down the steps to our bathroom. I gave Krista the look.

“We’re just playing video games.” she defended getting up.

“Don’t procreate on my couch.” I scolded playfully. Krista grabbed the milk from our fridge and poured a glass for herself all along while keeping her eyes on me.

“What?” I asked.

“You gonna tell me what happened last night?” she pressed. I wish I could. She’d laugh or call me a liar. I hardly think she believes me when I tell her about my reoccurring dream, she definitely won’t believe this.

“Saw a big ass deer on the sidewalk when I came home.” I lied.

“A deer? A deer scared you?”

“He was big,” I defended. She just looked at me. “I’m going to bed now.” I announced and walked down the hallway. I ran into Ben, already forgot he was here. Hopefully Krista will drop it and believe me. Maybe I’ll get to sleep tonight, it’s finally hitting me.