All the Colors of the Rainbow
December
There’s something simple about dying.
Everyone claims it’s a big occasion, but against their stories, there are no gates to heaven, or demons and angels swirling about your head, fighting for your soul as you fall into darkness. There is no white light, or sudden feeling of peace. There is no Angels singing, no voice from heaven, and there's certainly no God.
But what there is is the feeling of completion. The feeling of become whole, or perhaps you could call it the feeling of becoming nothing.
It’s almost the same thing.
As I lay against the marble of the bathroom, I realize all of this, and surprisingly enough I am relieved. After this is done it is all done, there will be no more judgement. No one to shame me into hiding. I will be nothing, forevermore gone.
I watch as blood swirls down the sides of the tub and into the drain.
Everyone claims it’s a big occasion, but against their stories, there are no gates to heaven, or demons and angels swirling about your head, fighting for your soul as you fall into darkness. There is no white light, or sudden feeling of peace. There is no Angels singing, no voice from heaven, and there's certainly no God.
But what there is is the feeling of completion. The feeling of become whole, or perhaps you could call it the feeling of becoming nothing.
It’s almost the same thing.
As I lay against the marble of the bathroom, I realize all of this, and surprisingly enough I am relieved. After this is done it is all done, there will be no more judgement. No one to shame me into hiding. I will be nothing, forevermore gone.
I watch as blood swirls down the sides of the tub and into the drain.