Scars Don't Heal When You Keep Cutting

I was rudely awakened by my bastard of an alarm. I groan and turn it off, then realize what day of the week it is.

“Hump day!” I shout, happy to be at the hump of the week. Wednesday. The weekend will be here before I know it!

I get out of bed and put on my clothes from yesterday because I’m so fucking lazy on hump days and run downstairs into the kitchen, grabbing my bookbag and phone on the way. Unlike how it is everyday, neither of my parents are in the kitchen. They sleep in on hump days to ‘get into the mood’.

I open the snack cabinet and pull out two granola bars. I try to put it in my pocket, but something’s in its way. I pull out what was in my pocket to find two chocolate bars. I shrug and toss the deformed chocolate bars onto the counter for whoever to clean up and stuff my granola bar in their place.

I walk out of the house and see Ben walking down the sidewalk, his head hung low and his hood up. I jog over to him. He notices me jogging over.

“Hey, Dan,” he mutters quietly, not looking up from his feet.

“Hey, you alright?” I ask him. He nods, but makes no move to make eye contact. I use my finger to tilt his chin up.

“What the hell?” I ask when I see the skin under his left eye. He had a decent sized bruise there. “What happened?” He stares at me with those horror-filled eyes and doesn’t say anything.

“Well?” I ask him again, a tad bit more harsh than the first time.

“Ehm...my Dad punched me...it was an accident,” he replies quietly, shifting his gaze to his feet again.

“You sure it was an accident, or do I have to go kick his ass?” is my reply.

“You love to kick ass, huh?” he asks me, reminding me of yesterday.

“Don’t change the subject.”

“I’m sure, we were playing but it got really rough. It was an accident, he apologized already.”

I let his chin go as we start to walk to school together, talking about anything that came to our weird little minds. We did that, until Trenton came running over, whooping and cheering at the sight of me.

“Danny! Danny! Hi! Hi! Let’s get to class now!” With that, he grabs my arm and takes off towards the building. I reached out to grab Ben too but Trenton was too quick this time. I’d just have to see Ben in class.

<><><>

Ms. King assigned us seats, all the tables pushed together so that they formed tables of four. I was happy to have my two friends in the group, Ben and Trenton. Trenton wasn’t too happy when DJ got put in the group farthest from ours, for obvious reasons. We didn’t have enough students in this class to have every group containing four students, so we were placed at the group for three.

Ms. King did right when she put Ben next to me. I’m pretty sure she did it on purpose.

But I still can’t help but to feel that we’re a bit too old for the classroom to be arranged this way. Well, then again, Ms. King seems to be the type of teacher to teach kindergarten or first grade. I’m not complaining, it’s whatever to me.

As long as I sit with my Benji.

We got this huge math packet to work on together. When I say huge, I mean huge. There’s like, eighty fucking questions. Me and Ben worked on our packets while Trenton planned his party for the weekend. I said he could plan and he could copy off of my work when he’s done.

The rest of the groups were talking, so while they were on problems fifteen to twenty, me and Ben were on question forty-five.

That’s why you should shut the fuck up when you have to work, because when you’re finished ahead of everyone else, you can talk. If you talk while you do your work, you’ll get off task, and you’ll get in trouble for incomplete work. Isn’t the first option so much better? You finish your work, but you still get the opportunity to talk.

“Psst! New kid!” someone behind me taps my shoulder. I turn around to face the voice. They've been calling me 'new kid' for three days, it's getting pretty annoying. I forget about it when he hands me a folded paper. “It’s not from me.” I take it and turn back in my seat. It has my name messily written across the top of it. I unfold it and read it.

‘Ben's a fucking freak :) both of y’all can suck my dick okay bye
From DJ'

I glare and pick up my pencil and write back,

'DJ- or Dick Juice (get it? Cuz, DJ?),
You're a disgrace to this society.
Now, do me a favor, and fuck yourself with a cactus :)
And I’m pretty sure your dick is too small anyways so ya
From Big Daddy Worsnop'

I fold it and give it back to the boy, who decides to be a nosy cunt and read it before giving it to him.

"Oh, shit! Roasted!"

"Fucking what?!" DJ shouts angrily, motioning for him to give him the paper. He tosses him the paper, but Ms. King takes it before he can read much.

"I'll take that for you. You guys don't wanna start a fight right now, especially if you have a lot of work to do," Ms. King takes the paper away and reads it before stuffing it into her pocket.

"Passing notes. Mr. Reed, what number are you on?"

"Twelve," DJ shrugs.

"Mr. Worsnop? What about you?"

"Forty-five,” I answer proudly, gaining everyone’s attention. They all start shouting now like fucking animals, asking me for answers.

"Uh, Ben did most of the work," I announce, pointing at Ben, who awkwardly tries to shield himself.

"Nerd! Nerd! What's number seventeen?"

"What's number twenty-one, Nerd Freak?"

And they have the nerve to call Ben names right on front of me. I glance to Ben, who now had his earplugs in his ears to block them out (and Ms. King lets him).

But I also notice the tears in his eyes.

"Let's take a break," I whisper to him, not realizing that he can’t hear me. I stand up and grab his arm before pulling him out of the classroom.

Yeah, of course they shut up now.

It's only my third day, and I already hate my classmates.

I wait for Ben to calm down a bit before speaking.

"Did they do that before I came along?” I ask after I take his earplugs out so he can hear me. He nods, keeping his head hung low. I can also hear Ms. King yelling at the class.

I can’t help but feel awkward.

I hear a door open then close. I look at the classroom door next to ours and see another boy standing there awkwardly, staring at the two of us.

“Ms. King’s yelling? That’s new,” he chuckles until he glances at Ben. “Is he okay?”

“I-I’m f-fine,” Ben whispers so quietly, it’s barely audible. The boy didn’t hear what he said and cocked an eyebrow.

“Yeah, he just needs a break from those idiots,” I answer for him.

The boy nods, understanding. “I’m Sam, by the way.” He holds a hand out for me to shake. People still greet each other that way?

“Danny,” I introduce myself as I shake his hand anyways. Sam holds a hand out for Ben to shake, but he only stares at it.

“Uh, is your friend okay?” Sam asks me as he pulls his hand back awkwardly. I smile sympathetically at Ben.

“Yeah, he’s just not really used to people talking to him,” I say, staring down at Ben. “Come on, Benji! Sam wants to be your friend! Right, Sam?” I then look up at Sam, who was smiling down at Ben. Ben looks up at him, then at me. I nod, telling him to just do it. Ben turns back to Sam, who puts his hand back up, and Ben shakily reaches his hand out towards Sam’s. He takes hold of his hand and Sam shakes it. Ben quickly shoves his hands in his pocket when Sam lets go.

“I-I’m Benjamin, b-but you can ju-just call m-me Ben,” Ben stutters. Sam smiles sadly at me.

“He doesn’t talk to other people much, he’s very shy,” I inform him. He nods understandingly.

“So, do you guys have any plans for Friday afternoon?” Sam asks.

Finally, someone who will actually talk to Ben. Trenton always talks to me, but acts like Ben doesn’t exist unless I bring him up.

Wait, shit. We do have plans this Friday.

“Yeah, my friend Trenton invited me to a party and I’m kinda forcing Benny here to come with me,” I chuckle. His smile seems to widen.

“Hey! I was actually gonna invite you two to come with me and my friends!” Sam chirps. “So I guess we can hang out this weekend!”

I nod with a smile, “Sounds great! I was actually trying to find more friends for Ben.” I pat Ben’s head, he ducks away from my hand with wide eyes. Sam only chuckles at us.

The door behind me opens.

“You boys may come in- ah, I see you’ve met Mr. Bettley!” Ms. King chirps happily.

“Yeah! He’s trying to be Ben’s friend, too!” I chirp as well as I turn to face her. Her smile brightens beautifully.

“Yup! And I’m gonna introduce him to my friends this Friday!” Sam adds happily. “I think they’ll like him.”

I lean closer to Ben’s ear, “See, you’re not a loser.” I said that, remembering him calling himself a loser once.

Ben glances up at me, then back to the floor before shrugging.