Purgatorial

The seat in front of me was vacant. Come to think of it... I discretely glimpsed over a shoulder. Another seat in the back was empty, where Zeke used to sit. Then another, to my right, one desk away from mine. That was Samantha's. Golden eyes turned to the front and my heart was heavy.

From day one, Phillip had sat there, in front of me. He used to turn and chat, or make funny remarks at what our English teacher said, often getting bashed by Mr. Carter. Frustrated, I pinched the bridge of my nose. Who knew where those two were?

"Now," said Mr. Carter, leaning on his desk. "Anyone who wants to pass this semester's last test should write those footnotes down. After you're done, turn to chapter forty-four of your Pride and Prejudice copy."

I thought about pretending to write the notes Mr. Carter had written on the blackboard. School was the last problem on my mind nowadays, I was fairly certain my chances of graduating were slim to none. I'd had a decent GPA before the start of this semester, but with all the boyfriend-drama, possessed students and crazed Angels tailing us, it had slipped. With a psychopath in town things weren't looking up. Nevertheless, I shouldn't stop trying and... I had nothing better to do. If I didn't count staring at Cam's back until class let out or maybe study Dawn's happy smile.

Ugh.

That wigged me out on such a great level. She was smiling because that creep convinced her she was in love with him. Yuck.

Writing down notes it was. Picking up my pencil, I read the first sentence, scribbling it on a fresh notebook page. As I transcribed more phrases I felt myself sink into a peaceful state, the outside wind grew distant, as did the clicking of pens on desks and the ticking clock. A heavy thump stroke behind my eyes, making me rub my forehead. When that didn't stop the incoming headache, I resorted to temple rubbing.

I sighed in annoyance. I thought a healing ability, even a slower one, meant pain wasn't as recurring. After last night my body had been good as new, like Tyler never put a finger on me. So couldn't my neat self-healing wash this away, too? Reaching into the yellow force, the much thicker force, I whispered 'heal' countless times. I wasn't sure how it worked. So, I was treating it like I did my other ability. I was asking.

I must've done it right because after maybe two minutes I felt the stinging of Power filling me and the throbbing went down. Brisk wind blew through my chin-length hair. Odd, had someone opened a window? Opening my eyes I was taken aback. I wasn't sitting, I wasn't even behind four walls. I was outside, somewhere surrounded by trees. But there was one bigger in particular, next to a transparent running stream. It was a quiet place. A waterfall was close, I knew. I knew because I'd been here before. Approaching the bigger tree with pink flowers, I let myself remember how Phillip had kissed me under it.

This was the place where the twins' parents met.

The day Phillip brought me here the day had been sunny, a stunning sunset had made for a beautiful canvas. Here, today, I couldn't hear birds jumping from one branch to another or chirping. Clouds sailed above me at a sullen pace, but strangely enough, the ambiance was hot. It was the kind of weather you expected from a summer storm.

Looking around I saw nothing but wilderness. What I saw across the stream was a whole different story. A young man stood tall, shoulders wide. He had dark sandy hair. My heart skipped a beat.

"Phillip," I whispered moving forward in an almost longing manner.

I kept going even as I sunk a foot into running water, then another. It was a good thing the water level only reached my knees. Getting across it, I felt something dark and cold twist my soul. Because Phillip wasn't alone. A coffin was set at his feet. Swallowing the giant lump, I set foot on solid ground, crunching grass as I marched to stand beside him. Caution, something whispered within me. The closer I got, the redder was the grass beneath my feet. All the deep crimson color led me to where Phillip was. My eyes pinpointed a shinning blueish object in his left hand. It was an Azure Dagger, tainted with blood. The blood wasn't dripping, it was dry.

A shiver crawled from my nape to my tipy-toes. I was one foot away from him. Phillip's head was down, eyes cast inside the coffin. Something primal screamed that I looked inside it, I fought it off for a minute, reaching for the hand clasping the Azure Dagger.

Phillip's head tilted then, not startled by my presence. Instead, I was the one inhaling deeply. Phillip's eyes had always held—much like his brother's—a beacon. They were a startling electric blue, crystal as two lagoons. They transmitted vibrancy, life. Looking into his eyes now... They were blue, alright. Only they were glowing, making them transcendental.

Almost Angel-like.

Fear spiked as I recognized little of my friend. There was some sort of... void to him.

"Phillip," I intoned softly. "What did you do?"

Lowering those blue-shimmering eyes to the bloody weapon, he spoke, "I followed my destiny."

Not knowing what to say to that or to the smile scampering across his features, I finally gave in, staring into the polished wood coffin.

My heart fell to the cold, hard ground and I stumbled back, covering my mouth to stop... I wasn't sure what. From screaming? From vomiting? Both. A strangled wail sounded loudly just as my knees buckled—it came from me, the sound. That coldness inside me intensified to whole new levels. I tried tearing my gaze away, to stop myself from falling over a precipice I could never, ever, climb out of. But it was impossible.

His eyes held no moonlight glow, they're pupils were opaque. The skin was pale, graying along the scalp and his hair didn't look silky, having lost it's healthy raven color. Blood tainted his faded mouth, spilling over his chin and neck. And the wound... It was on his chest, on the left. It was torn wide open and...

Cameron was dead.

Phillip... Phillip had killed him. His brother. His twin.

I fell on my knees, shaking. I screamed and kept screaming bloody murder, But I felt loneliness consume me, bitterness become me and finally I dropped into the biggest hole known to mankind. A hole where light was gone, hope was dead and I was forever incomplete.

***

I shot up, eyes so wide they threatened to pop from my skull. The whole class looked at me as if I were crazy. I understood why when I closed my mouth.

I'd been screaming. Loudly.

Breathing quickly, I looked to where Cam sat. Of course, he was already up and coming toward my desk. My head couldn't register why leaping from my seat and hugging him close would be weird, I was too caught up in the nightmare. Heaving every breath into Cam's chest, I clung tightly, like a koala bear.

"She wasn't able to sleep tonight, too many nightmares about yesterday. With Samantha." Cam efficiently lied to Mr. Carter and to who else wanted to know, which was everyone.

"Ah... Of course. That was quite traumatic on everyone, I believe." Mr. Carter said, and I could imagine him scratching his neck. "Why don't you take Nina outside? She looks pale."

"Yes," Cameron agreed, pushing my head against his chest. Tears nearly spilled as I heard his heart thumping. It was quick like mine. "Fresh air will be good."

"Or maybe the nurse's office. Doesn't she have a history with fainting?" That was Dawn. She sounded... sort of worried.

Cameron rebuked her, "Don't worry, I'll take care of her."

I let myself be pulled along, keeping eyes off any classmates, Vanessa and Dawn included. Cam closed the door, keeping gently glued at his side. We heard Mr. Carter giving instruction for the rest of class to carry on working and if they too needed help coming to terms with what they'd seen yesterday, they could talk to the guidance counselor for grief issues.

"Do you want to go outside?" I wanted to squeal for hearing his voice. It was soft, melting like rich dark chocolate. Not trusting my voice, I nodded. "Okay."

Cameron linked our fingers as we walked. Soon, we found ourselves outside, behind the school where wooden tables and benches were stationed. He dragged me over to a bench and we sat. Wind ruffled our hair making me jump. It was a warm wind, warm enough to let you know spring was around the corner. It reminded me of the clearing... of what I'd seen.

"You fell asleep," Cam kicked off, quietly. "Did you dream about anything?"

I didn't know exactly how to answer. Yes, I'd seen something. But how could I tell him...? It wasn't just the fact he'd been dead—a hiccup got loose from me. How could I tell Cameron his brother had done it?

Phillip was the last family he had, the person he could always lean on and count on. The brother he would've died to have back.

"I saw..." a tremble started in my lips. "I saw..."

"You saw what?"

I couldn't tell him, not about Phillip, but I couldn't outright lie and say I'd seen nothing.

"I saw you dead!" I cried at last, burying my face in my hands.

The boy beside me was incredible still for moments. Tears stained my hands, face and wherever else they touched. The despair I'd felt in the dream had followed me. Until two strong hands gripped my shoulders, shaking me a tad. Lifting my head, I saw Cameron crouching in front of me.

"It was a dream—a nightmare. I'm alive, right? And I plan on staying alive for a long time, little bird. You can't get rid of me that easily." I sniffed, looking at my feet. He was saying those things to reassure me, but we both knew death didn't ask permission to strike.

"But my dreams..."

"Not every dream you ever had came true, did it?" I hesitated. I couldn't remember every dream I'd had, but... Why would Phillip kill Cameron? He loved his brother. He'd gone to Hell in order to save his life. Maybe... this dream hadn't been a precognitive.

"I... guess."

Cam wiped gently at my face, "Was that all?"

I snapped back.

"Don't you think it's enough?" I shrieked, defensive.

Cam's eyebrows puckered slightly and for a second, I thought he might call my bluff. A short sigh left me as he nodded, looking apologetic. Which made me guilty. I just couldn't tell him, though. It was too horrible of a possibility.

Framing my face, Cam tilted it upward and I gazed through teary eyes into depthless ones.

"It's been a couple of crazy days. It gets to you, Rapunzel."

"I thought you weren't calling me that anymore. Because of my hair." I observed stupidly, exhaling swiftly. My nerves would take a while to mend. It wasn't everyday you dreamed your Ex murdered the love of your life.

He fingered the tawny waves, a small smile played on his lips for my benefit.

"Nah, I decided to bring it back. I like it too much, and besides, it'll grow back."

My heart thumped noisily as his obsidian eyes dropped onto mine. We regarded each other silently for a while. Cameron leaned back on his elbows, propping them on the wooden lunch table. With each breath he took his chest rose and fell evenly, granting me peace of heart. He was alright and he'd still be okay tomorrow, and after that. Phillip would never hurt his brother. Not intentionally, that snarky voice whispered, but what's happened to Phillip? What if you're wrong?

"Stop thinking, Nina." Golden eyes jerked to his face. Cam was squinting at me, sheltering his eyes from sunlight. The light highlighted the carved cheekbones, contrasting with the shock of black hair. Against all odds, a small smile crept up. "What?"

"You look like you're thinking, too." I mumbled softly.

Cameron licked his upper lip before closing his eyes. Tilting back his head, he let sunlight wash all over his face and neck. The small smile warmed with affection. He looked like a big lazy cat.

"I am thinking." He admitted easily. "We're going out tonight."

The smile shattered.

"What?"

Cam made a face, inching away. Quickly, he was back to sitting straight, face mildly serious.

"No need to screech." I glowered at him. "Last time I officially asked you on a date you said 'no'—"

"Because Sam was possessed by—"

"I remember. And this time you'll say 'no' because Cain's around and there are two Cambions lurking about. But I'm not taking 'no' this time. There will always be someone or something, Nina." Cam paused. "Today's looking like a good day. We've made it to second period without someone getting killed." I sulked momentarily at his dark humor. "Let's go out tonight and have fun. Like, you know, a normal couple."

"What if something does happen?" I hugged my arms in turn of myself.

"If something happens we'll deal." He answered quietly, deeply. "We're allowed to be happy once in a blue moon."

I rubbed my arms subconsciously. We'd never gone on a proper date before. Vividly, I recalled the night we returned from Hell and Cameron stopped things from going all the way between us. That had been one of the sweetest things because he'd wanted us to have what other couples had, normal stuff. Obviously, his plan hadn't played out. With Lucifer being in control of his body and all.

Cam's mouth was drawn into a sexy pout that made me do mostly anything. It was a dangerous weapon. I nibbled a thumb nail. Cameron cocked his head reminding me of a kicked Labrador puppy.

I sighed.

"Okay."

"Okay?" I nodded. He leaned forward taking up my breathing space. "Just so we're clear," his musky, sweet, scent tingled my nose. "You're saying I can finally take you out on a date?"

I slapped his arm and he hushed out a laugh.

"If you ask again I'll—"

Cameron's hand grasped the nape of neck, gently pulling me forward. He kissed me. A long, hard kiss. When his mouth retreated it felt like I was coming up for air. I could drown in Cameron and scary enough, I wouldn't mind.

***

We'd gone back to class after I'd pretty much convinced myself to chill. Because even if by some freak possibility Phillip had gone dark side on us, he wouldn't just pop out of the blue. Hopefully. A bigger half of me looked at the scenario as silly. Phillip was the most compassionate person I knew, a person capable of sacrificing himself for his loved ones. Cam was on his top-priority list.

For the first time since returning, we were having lunch in the cafeteria. We were sitting at our usual table and while I stomached the half decent hot-dog, I also forced myself not to count the empty chairs.

"Did Gary see you in Vamp-mode?" I asked, turning eyes on V who was taking a swig of her own personal fav tomato juice.

She wiped a mouth corner, shaking her head.

"He passed out from pain. You know, after Cain stabbed him with a scary kitchen knife." My lips turned down. "I can't believe Dawn thinks she's in love with him."

"She doesn't have a choice," I shrugged. "He fed her a love potion. She does whatever he tells her and is okay with whatever he does." Like agreeing to let him run her over. I bit down on the bread and wiener way harder than I had to.

Vanessa tapped her fingers absently, looking over my shoulder. Gazing behind me, I saw a scruffy looking Daren sitting at the jock table. He wasn't doing much of eating. Or much of anything, really. Dark circles bruised the hollow of his eyes. Samantha and Daren had been together for months now; they were both mean idiots and I guessed it made them perfect for one another. Maybe Daren did like Sam.

Letting out a low sigh, I faced V. We shared a fleeting mournful look before she moved onto my date. It wasn't like her to be uber excited over dates, kisses or boys. That was Dawn's territory. I suspected she was trying to light the atmosphere.

"Where do you think you're going?"

"I don't know. Not the movies, though. We can't go anywhere outside Haven Hills' boarder."

Her nose pinched in a cute way, "I really dislike that guy." Join the club. "But we're ignoring him. This is about your date. Cam didn't say anything?"

"I'm not sure he knows where we're going, either. He just asked because of my... my nightmare." Vanessa took the hint and didn't ask about the nightmare. Although, I'm sure she could peek inside my head. "And if he does know and I ask, he won't tell. Trust me."

A slight wave of jealousy jumped out at me. It was something I forgot often nowadays because of how Cameron looked at me, the things he whispered into my ear and even the way he smiled like he saw no one else but me. It was because I knew he loved me. But before me he'd had someone else, someone sitting at this very table. Even after being told countless times they hadn't been serious, friends who went out, I felt a tinge of envy.

Pursing my lips, I asked nonchalantly, "Where did you guys go on your first date?"

V's hand shot for her mouth as she choked on a sandwich bite. She cleared her throat, then, chewed the rest and swallowed.

"We went to the movies."

I tugged a short wave behind an ear, "Oh. Okay." Now I felt glad that we couldn't go. Despite everything bad happening, I was psyched to go on this date. Our first official one.

A chair rattled beside me and a red tray was set down with more food than I could ever hope to eat. The ever present green apple made me grin. Cam dropped into his seat. His left hand didn't stay in sight for long, going under the table and stroking my knee.

My leg bounced once his fingers groped my thigh. I sent him a disapproving glare, which he totally brushed off.

"So," our staring competition got broken. We looked at Vanessa who looked a tad uncomfortable. "Any news from Phillip?"

Cameron's face grew stone-cold. His voice dropped a hundred degrees.

"None whatsoever."

V shot me a quick glance. I shook my head a tiny bit, so Cam wouldn't notice. I pretended not notice how Cam's fingers had clamped around my leg at his brother's name, I also pretended I hadn't skipped a breath. Cam eased his grip, rubbing soft circles as a way of being sorry.

"He's a big boy," Cameron stated, a mask of indifference slapped on. "Plus, he has a Witch to watch his back. What more could he need?" the rhetorical question dripped with sarcasm.

A chill invaded me. Before we'd gone through Serena's portal, when I was saying goodbye to Phillip, I'd told him I had a bad feeling. I just hoped Cameron was right and Phillip could stay out of trouble. Otherwise, it would mean trouble for us.