Worlds Apart.

I failed at my attempt to bring the three of us closer. It was a poor excuse for an attempt at all but it was worth a try. It's just hard for me to turn my back on Freddie, it always has. Carter was right, we do have history. A terrible history, but still.

In a way, I feel as though I owe Freddie even though I don't. For the times when I wasn't there for him when we were together. Don't get me wrong I picked his ass up from bars more times then I can remember. But he needed help, and I never really offered him what he offered to himself. Maybe he wasn't ready then, but he is now.

And now he needs me.

He's got no one, no positive influence in his life. All of his friends are worse off than he is.

However, Carter is also right about that fact that he isn't my problem anymore. Shouldn't be my problem anymore.

And Carter means everything to me.

I somehow need to find a balance.

But these days balance is hard to find. Between my mid terms at school, going into internship, keeping my job at the packaging company and maintaining a normal social life.. It gets a little difficult.

Which is why I was semi- grateful that Freddie was on his way back to his treatment facility.

"I want to thank you for everything, Jar. You've really helped me keep myself on track. I know that when I come back for good I'll be okay. But for now I need to continue my road to recovery. I..." His voice trailed off.

"You what?"

I was scared. What would he say? He wishes we could be more? He's sorry that he still wants me back? He thinks Carter doesn't care about me because he denied our friendship?

"I'll miss you. That's all. I wish you and Carter well. I know I've never met him but maybe someday that will change. You seem happy. I'm glad."

I sighed, but not out of pity.

"Thank you Freddie. I hope you get to the center safely. If you get enough tokens or whatever, you can call me. If you need me. Ok?"

He climbed up on the bus step and hoisted his bag over his shoulder.

He sat in a window seat and waved goodbye to me.

And that was that. No more Freddie for a few more weeks.

----------------

Now my main focus was everything else.

Carter was more at ease knowing that Freddie was a few hundred miles away with almost no communication at all.

But it was honestly better for all three of us.

I noticed that he had barely touched his lunch. It was one of his favorites and it was still sitting on the middle shelf of the fridge.

"Carter didn't you want the food we ordered?"

He turned around from the coffee pot and I saw what I hadn't seen until just then.

I had drove Freddie to the bus station early in the morning and missed Carter getting out of bed.

He appeared to have swollen droopy eyes and a little redness under his nose.

"I'm a bit under the weather today. Woke up feeling congested and achy. I'll save it for dinner if I'm up to it."

I felt terrible because if I knew I would have went to the store at got him medicine and some soup.

"Oh no," I said as I walked over to him to feel his head. "You feel warm. Do you think you'll need to go to the doctor?"

He smiled and shook his head.

I was wondering why he seemed happy about what I said.

"You're cute. First of all, I'm not that sick. Second of all, not only do I not need a doctor, I'm going into the office for a full day. And lastly, I never "go to the doctor" they come to me," he said with a laugh.

Ohh I guess that's right. When you have money things are quite different. You can pay to not have to wait for hours to see a doctor. That must be nice.

"Oh," I said with a blush to my checks. "Well I think you should stay here and get some rest. I'll run out to the store and get you some cold medicine and chicken noodle soup."

Carter's eyes softened and he held onto my hands.

His were ice cold.

"Thank you Jarrett, that's very sweet. But I'm fine. Trust me, when I'm really sick I'll let you take care of me. No one really ever has. Not even my ex wife."

Wow.

I lived a pretty mediocre life but I always had someone take care of me when I had a cold. My sister, exes, hell even Freddie bought me cough drops once.

"Well, you're with me now. And I plan to take care of you when you're not feeling well. I hope you'd do the same for me."

Carter kissed my temple.

"Of course I would."

But only part of me believed him.

If no one ever took care of him, how would he know how to take care of someone else?

----------

Carter's cold was gone in a few days.

I took all of my mid terms and was anxiously awaiting the grades to be posted online.

I felt pretty exhausted but couldn't quite wind down. I wasn't sure why.

I jumped slightly when I felt Carter's hands on my neck. But then I relaxed when I felt him start to massage my skin.

"You need to stop worrying. You did fine on your tests. You're holding all of your tension in your neck, and shoulders.

He bent down and kissed my neck; up and down.

I felt a shiver make its way down my spine.

"T-That feels amazing," I said, referring to the pressure on my upper back.

"Good, I'm using techniques from my masseuse. Maybe I'll have her come down this weekend to spoil you. But for now you just have me."

I bit my lip.

"That's fine with me," I said as I tried my very best not to let out a moan.

He was relaxing me too much, it felt too good.

And his lips on my neck wasn't helping.

"Er careful," I muttered as I felt my pants become tighter.

"Careful? Of what? Am I hurting you?"

I laughed nervously, swallowed, and then shook my head.

"Not at all. Um. You.."

I said no more, I just pulled his hand down and put it over my zipper.

He gasped.

"Jarrett!"

I sat up and covered my face.

"Sorry! It just happened-"

He grabbed my hands and put them down.

"Hey no, don't be sorry. I didn't mean to make you feel embarrassed. I'm just surprised you got into it so easily. But... That's a good thing."

I let out a breath of relief and smiled.

He kissed me and while he did so he sneakily unzipped me and started to massage me.

I closed my eyes and let him; I didn't want him to stop. It felt incredible. He was doing everything I liked.

And I knew he didn't want anything in return.

I whispered his name and hid in the crook of his neck while he continued.

All of my stresses slowly started to dissipate.

And I never felt more intoxicated by someone in my life.