Fall Thru

Ohshitohshitohshitohshit. Oh. Fucking. Shit.

Never in my life have I wanted to wake up less than today. If someone had told me I’d wake up in Rain’s bed with dried semen between my legs and pussy juice on my lips, I would have asked for cyanide. Death was slightly more appealing than sitting, naked, across from a confused Rain and his horde of whores.

“What happened yester—glass-hoax?”

“We connected.”

“How?”

“I think you can feel how.”

Nope, cyanide was better than this. “Look,” I said, waving one hand while I struggled to hold a scratchy embroidered pillow over my naked body, “Glass-hoax was a mistake. A not totally consensual mistake,” I added, narrowing my eyes.

He returned the gesture. “You were open. A willing and full participant.”

“Yeah, ‘cause you drugged me.”

“You were given no drugs.”

“Really?” I snarked, “Mind explaining what that drink and fruit were? Or did you have that girl put something on the knife so it effected my blood?” I discounted nothing.

His eyes pierced me and I shivered, remembering that look from a couple hours earlier when I’d been between his legs with my mouth on his— “Human, you gave yourself to me as I to you. We both know it.”

I growled, even as I knew Rain was right. But just because I didn’t outright say that what he was doing was wrong didn’t mean it wasn’t. Tilly from last night had been overly sensitive and touchy-feely. That heifer had screamed and begged Rain to fuck her, and demanded some other centaur ‘bring that cock over’ for her to suck. Tilly from yesterday had sex with horse-men, went down on girls, and felt colors. If ‘feeling colors’ wasn’t the universal sign of someone tripping off their ass I wasn’t sure what was.
But now it was time to go. Time to stuff last night into a box and shove it deep, deep down inside.

“I’m gonna head out,” I muttered, snatching a damp animal skin and wrapping it around my body. Shivering, I tried not to think of the fluids making it wet. From the smell, it sure wasn’t water. Though it’s probably Rain, my internal voice snickered. “Thanks for inviting me to the Gathering again, Chief Rain. It’s been real.”

I made a move to get up and he did the same, pushing naked women off his body. They protested, whining, reaching half-heartedly for his semi-erect cock before falling back into the pillows. “Not until the Connection breaks. You will remain here as is custom.”

“Connection?” Gathering. Connection. Why couldn't they just blatantly say what it was instead of giving the event vague names? Vague names that got me into trouble.

He cocked his head, muscles pulling tight in his neck. I looked at the chords, mesmerized before my eyes caught on a bite mark where his neck met his shoulder. A memory came fuzzy and clear all at once; I saw myself, held up by nothing but Rain’s cock and hands, begging him to fuck me harder before I bit into him and came.

“When a male centaur marks a female’s womb, a connection is made. It is only broken if the seed does not take root,” Rain explained.

He could not be saying what I was pretty fucking sure he was saying. “I can get pregnant?” I whispered the word like a spell. Or a curse.

He inclined his head, stamping the ground with his hooves. “Of course.”

Of course.

My head was going to explode. Going to pop right off like its own little space ship and self-destruct if I didn't get out of here This. Very. Minute.

“Nah,” I clicked my tongue as I inched my way out of the tent. “I’m about one second away from totally losing my marbles and flippin’ shit which would be really bad, so I’m just going to go and pretend like you didn't say I could be pushin’ out a horse.”

“I do not understand you,” he said, eyes hard. “But you will stay until the witches’ come. This is the purpose of the Gathering.”

I barked out a laugh as I gingerly stepped over a wet spot and tried all at once to look at the ground and keep my eyes trained on Rain.“To fuck a girl pregnant.”

“To bring life back into the tribe after death has come.”

Oh. In a twisted way that made sense. Sort of like Hercules and the Hydra. Cut off one head and two more grow back. Quite the finger to death.

“And I hope that works out for your tribe, Chief Rain, but trust me I’m not pregnant.” And if I was than I’d make sure I wasn't. Abortion had never factored into my life. Sure I was pro-choice, but I never thought that I'd have to make that choice. Especially not involving a magical half-man, half-horse.

I took a wider step and my legs shook violently, hips straining against any effort. I groaned as semen slid out of me and onto the ground. Oh God. Bile raced up my throat, but I swallowed it, screwing my eyes shut and trying to picture myself past this moment—past this stupid planet. Back in my Master’s seminars, writing my thesis, being forced to watch Teen Titans with Brandon.

Brandon. I hadn’t thought about the kid in weeks, not since I spoke to his parents. In fact, I hadn’t talked to my professors or friends or anyone from Earth in over a week. Not my mother or father or siblings. And I realized how scary that was. This wasn’t my home. Fever wasn’t really my friend, and Caster wasn’t my partner. This was temporary because of a douchey guy selling charms outside of Comic Con. Somehow I’d forgotten that; felt like I could put my stake in this world and call it home because I had to be here for a year, and if I was going to immerse myself then I was going to do it right. Maybe that would have been fine in another country where we at least had the commonality of species, but not here.

Get. Past. This. Moment.

Rain’s hand banded on my upper arm a second later, pulling me against him. I hadn't even heard him move. There was nothing in his expression but cool calmness. Too cool.

“You planned this,” I accused in a hiss. It wasn’t a question and I wasn’t naive enough to think he’d give me an answer. “You get me here, fuck me, and claim under some stupid centaur custom that I have to stay here and wait for some witches I’m pretty sure won’t even show up. Why?”

Yesterday couldn’t have been a coincidence because I didn’t believe in those. Rain had been desperate to have me here, had sent Fly to get me. From the start, Caster had been weary and Duke dropped hints about not fucking up. Question was, why didn’t they all just come out and say, ‘This could be dangerous. Rain wants to keep you for himself. Just make sure you don’t have sex with him, drink anything, or eat anything.’ There was no way they didn’t know this could happen. Lamb among wolves that I was, shit hitting the fan was inevitable. So why? Was I some kind of peacekeeping tool between Duke and the centaurs? Something to solidify their tenuous truce?

Rain’s eyes narrowed to slits, his hooves hitting the ground and sending vibrations through my toes. “You have stumbled into a situation you cannot handle, child. Yesterday was an example. I invited you to learn why you were here. No other reason. But you opened yourself to me; gave free your body. The witches will come and they will evaluate, and if my child grows in you then you will stay through the birth. If you choose to leave after, you may. But I keep my child.”

If it’d been any other day I would have savagely attacked the whole ‘why you are here’ thing, but not today. I was done with the macho bullshit and being kept in the dark and being treated like some incompetent pest who didn’t know her left foot from her left eyeball. “You want to threaten me?” I got all up in his face. “Remember turnabout’s fair play.”

“I'm not threatening you, human,” he growled, standing straighter and peering down at me. “I am explaining the custom. You are in my world.”

“This isn’t your world,” I said, doing a mental check of my body to make sure nothing was too sore or unusable. “Now, you got tree blink to let me go or you're going to be in another world entirely. And I promise you, I’m the queen there. Tudo.”

Asshole pulled me closer, completely ignoring the promise in my eyes and the tightening in my fatigued muscles. He ducked his head to meet my gaze at level. “Duke is a fool that lets you play with knives; I am not. You may see this as prison, but it is protection.”

“Opie.”

“Human—”

“Tree.” I twisted in his arms as I head butted him. He stumbled back, shaken, and I took advance of his confusion to squat, swiping my legs in an arch and catching his ankles until he fell sideways to the floor. The girls who’d been either asleep or lazily watching my interaction with Rain suddenly popped up, some shouting and others rushing at me with murder in their eyes.

No way I was fighting off a dozen plus naked women. Bouncing up to my feet, I broke into a run, pushing past my discomfit. I clutched the animal skin to my breasts, bounding over party-goers that’d decided to camp outside and skirting a few milling around. The women were right on my ass, and with a roar so was Rain. Which of course got the other centaurs’ attention.

Done.

Back broken.

E-fucking-nough.

I mentally patted myself on the back even as I straddled my bike and started the engine. It’d taken me weeks to throw in the towel, finally admit that this wasn't working and wouldn't work. Faeries, elves, demons, and centaurs aside, I'd done my best and more and now it was time to go. Wherever those pills took me was a hellauva lot better than between a woman's legs or on Rain’s dick.

I shivered as I sped away, both from the memory and the cold. Clutching the make shit cloak tighter, I tried to fight the wind’s pull on the fabric, but on a sharp turn it was snatched. So naked I rode, trying my best to elude the stampeding centaurs and trick my body into thinking it was warm instead of on the edge of hypothermia as my chattering declared.

My coping mechanism? Denial and delusions. I was fully clothed with not a drop of sex-cretions leaving a puddle on the seat of my bike. There was no way I had sex with a centaur because gross. No first time lesbian experiences were had. Especially not in front of an audience. And there was no way, in a bajillion years, I was pregnant. Wasn't happening. In fact all I remembered was going to the Gathering, talking with Rain, leaving, and spending the rest of the evening binge watching Dance Moms. This was all just an elaborate hallucination brought on by lack of sleep, a week on the road, and a very deprived libido.

The thoughts nearly worked.

Nearly.

It wasn't until I was skidding to a stop and flinging myself off my bike and toward my room that my perfect little fantasy started to crack. I flashed a group of guards and several maids my birthday suit, and instead of politely looking away, they stared. Hard. So hard that it was impossible to ignore my lack of clothing or the obvious sex signs in the form of love bites, scratches, handprints, and dark smudges where fingertips had gripped a little too hard on my body. And let’s not forget the semen drying on my legs.

Snatching a curtain off a rod and tearing a hole in the wall, I wrapped it toga style around myself and took in my first deep breath of the day.

Denial and delusion were turning out to be shit friends.

I looked down the corridor to the labyrinth of hallways that lead to my room, turning my head and glancing at the ones leading to Duke’s office. It was a waste of precious seconds that I didn't have, but I needed it. Needed to figure out what the hell I was doing.

The pills. They still seemed like the best option given I trusted Duke and Rain as far as I could throw them. But there was still a gaping hole of nothing where the pills were considered. Well, not nothing. A few dozen missing kids and only one link in the form of black alchemist bags. Still, what if the drugs didn’t transport me anywhere. What if they killed me and turned my body into steam so there was no evidence? Or what if they did take me somewhere but it was a desolate planet where man-eating-whatevers roamed free.

Seconds turned to minutes as I stood staring into space and contemplating my three options: swallowing questionable pills, help from Duke, imprisoned by Rain. It wasn't until I heard the thunder clap of hooves that I snapped myself out of it.

“Human,” Rain thundered from the courtyard a few hundred yards away, the sound carrying through the halls.

Rain wasn’t an option, and I didn’t have the time to run to my room, get the pills, and then run over to Duke’s offices. And I wasn’t going to run over to Duke without some sort of back up plan considering that asshole might have set everything up.

Questionable pills it was.

I hiked up the makeshift dress and sprinted down the hallways, hoping I knew the compound better than Rain. My breathing labored, thighs burning, I pushed myself to the absolute limit, pausing only long enough to slide the tapestry-door to my room aside. Blood was beating in my ears, deafening me, and my vision zoomed to my bedroom at the top of my spiral staircase and the small pouch I’d hidden inside a tiny hole in the mattress.

Slamming the curtain back into place, I watched it shimmer and disappear, hoping that Rain wouldn’t know how to open it. I took the stairs three at a time, forcing my muscles to make the climb.

“Why did I buy you clothing if you were just going to tear down my curtains?” a voice said from my bed. A scream leaked from my lips before I could bite back the sound.

“Jesus Christ,” I swore, glaring at Duke. “What the hell are you doing?”

“Waiting to see if you followed my directions.” His voice was calm, expression neutral. His eyes raked me from head to toe as I looked between him and the bottom level. “You did not.”

“Your directions were shit,” I seethed. “You know what would have been better? ‘Hey, Tilly, make sure you don’t eat or drink anything at the Gathering, because then you’ll lose your mind and have sex with a horse-man!” I couldn’t have stopped myself from screaming the last if I’d tried.

Duke hissed, thick braid of gold swinging agitated behind his back as he stood. I had a clear view of his fangs and could feel the anger radiating off him. “I didn't think I needed to tell you not to have sex with a centaur, Tilly. That should have been self-explanatory.”

“You should have told me about the lament and the—the other thing.”

“Lament and Mother’s Release,” he bit. “Neither of which make you have sex with centaurs. The only thing they do is take away your inhibitions and allow you to do what you wanted without things like morals and conscious stalling you.”

“That’s not true—”

“It is,” Duke growled, coming closer to me. “If I’d known you wanted to have sex with a centaur, I wouldn’t have let you go. But you were very vehement that you would not open yourself, that you would not participate, that you would ‘say hi’ and leave. That is what you said, but it was my mistake to put that trust in you. A human.”

I blinked hard, recalling our conversation. “At Gatherings you can choose to open yourself to another and connect with them…But that is not what you should do.”

“What should I do?”

“Go. Do not stay...Congratulate him on his new position while giving your condolences about his father...Then leave.”

“I’ll say hi to Rain and leave. Doubt I’ll want to sit and have tea or anything.”

“That’s good to hear. And make sure you do not open yourself.”

“No problem of that.”

I fumbled, trying to turn it back on him. This couldn’t be my fault. There was no way I’d wanted Rain. “Y-You were vague. You should have said—”

“I said do not stay!” he roared. “If you felt uncertain or were not clear on anything else, you should have said something. I was not vague. I told you it was an orgy. I told you I did not trust the Chief. I told you to be careful. You assured me you would. This. Is on. You.”

The clap of hooves sounded in the distance, a warning. His eyes flashed behind me to the door and he sawed his fangs over his lips. “You’ll go to Janos. The witches will watch you to see if the Connection holds.”

“But Rain—”

“Will agree,” he cut me off. “It is an acceptable alternative, though I’m sure my actions will have repercussions. Get dressed quickly. I’ll come back and pack you a bag after you’re off planet.”

All my irate anger, my fear that Duke worked against me, that my only option was taking a pill that might kill me, faded. Tension leaked out of my muscles, and I was suddenly exhausted. A little foolish too.

Duke left, heading down the stairs with deliberate steps. How had this become my fault? The only thing I’d voluntarily done was train to be a Bookkeeper. Rain forced me to go the the Gathering. I was forced to stay in this world. None of this fell on me.

Except the sex.

I tried to remember the past night and found the pieces perfectly assembled for me. I’d gone from guarded to free in the span of a few minutes, that sudden weight allowing me to confess secrets even I didn’t know I had. Like how I did want Rain. How I did wonder what a woman felt like. How I’d always wanted to try doing it in front of an audience, with two men, and—

Groaning, I covered my eyes. This wasn’t the time. Rain was a few minutes away at best, a curtain was still the only clothing I had, and I couldn’t let Duke find those pills when he packed me a bag. Thinking on it now, those pills would just be another nail in my coffin. Duke and Caster trusted me, but I hadn’t given them the same treatment. I still saw them as Vampire and Demon, still saw myself as better than them because of my humanity. Whether I realized it or not, it was the truth.

Pushing away from the bed, I wiped wayward tears from my eyes and went to my wardrobe for clothes. A minute later I was dressed in jeans and a t-shirt, forcing my feet into a pair of boots.

“Tilly, come down here. We don’t have much time.”

“Almost done,” I called back to Duke, reaching for the pills in my mattress and stuffing them in my back pocket.

It was a quick skip down the stairs and then we were out the door, moving across the grass to the red tents. Duke barely looked at me, eyes focused on the hallway Rain was most likely going to come out of. I kept my eyes firmly to the ground, mostly angry at Rain but also a little angry at myself.

The tents came clearer into view, pretty with the backdrop of the waterfall. Not so much surrounded by centaurs. “Shit,” I muttered, as I looked over my shoulder and saw more coming from the hallway.
In another fifteen seconds, we were surrounded.

“Magistrate,” Rain greeted, coming to stand in front of us.

Duke bowed low and I quickly followed suit. “Chief Rain, a pleasure to meet you.”

“It seems you have my Gathering partner.”

“Is she?” Duke asked with feigned innocence. “I was under the impression that she was my bookkeeper.”

I bit my tongue against a claim over myself and let them do their male posturing. There was no way Rain was letting me go to the witches, and there was no way Duke was letting me go with Rain. That much was apparent. For whatever reason, I’d become a pawn in the tenuous alliance between them.

Rain stomped his hooves, glowering before smoothing his expression into practiced boredom. “She opened herself to me and we connected. As I explained to the human—Tilly,” he corrected to illustrate a point, though I wasn’t sure what that was, “She must remain with me until a witch can ascertain if she is carrying or not. You must know how important a centaurian child is to the tribe.”

“But you understand,” Duke parried just as smoothly, “that her status as a human and a bookkeeper change things. We are not sure how her body will react if the foal connects or not. It would be in both her and the babe’s best interest to be under the constant care of witches, should complications arise.”

How had my life gone so… wrong in only a matter of months? Not just my life. I’d had common sense before, an ability to reason and understand. I studied women in different cultures, understood the hold traditions had on a community. The species and planet might be different but reactions to ingrained societal norms rarely changed.

It was time to throw myself on the sword. I’d made this mess, and I needed to clean it up. “Rain, I—”
“Chief,” a centaur to my left interrupted, glaring at me. There was such visible hate in his eyes, it made my muscles tense and prepare. “You call him Chief.”

I took a careful look around, peering intently into all the faces surrounding me. Hate, anger, loathing, and even a touch of fear was what most held in their eyes and the lines of their face. God, I’d have to watch my back constantly, listen to the biting words and bitchy retorts of these and other centaurs in the tribe. If I went with Rain, would I even be with him? Would he just keep me locked away from everyone?

For that matter, if I went to the witches what would happen? Would I get the same treatment? Would it cause a rift between them and the centaurs? I’d thought my options changed, that going with Duke and trusting him when I’d failed was the right course of action. But fuck it. My failures were my own, as were my successes. I wasn’t a pawn to be used in a pissing match and I wasn’t one to leave myself at the mercy of others.

This was my life and my choice and no one was taking that from me.

Duke said something and Rain deflected. I took the moment of distraction and reached into my back pocket, grasping one of the pills tucked into the pouch. Before I could think more about my choice I opened my mouth and threw the pill down my throat, dry swallowing.

“What is that?” someone yelled.

Rain made a move toward me and Duke intercepted. They said something to each other, before one of the men surrounding me grabbed my arm. I stared into the guy’s eyes, seeing a million reflection of myself in this moment. Hands that weren’t hands tugged at my skin, my bones, my very soul in a move I’d felt what seemed like a lifetime ago in a photo booth. The centaur’s grip loosened or maybe my body did. Didn’t matter. The ground opened and I watched a million and one versions of myself fall through space and time. Again.