Shuffle

Spring was finally here. I took a deep breath, closing my eyes as I inhaled the scents of Kyoto. Sakura littered the countryside in full bloom. Their petals drifted quietly in the crisp wind, falling to the ground delicately. I couldn’t believe I was finally here. And I would be here for another month! A smile twisted my lips as I tugged my heavy sweater closer to my body.

“Coffee?” Saya’s voice sounded out from above me. I glanced up to find her leaning against the second story balcony, a grin plastered to her lips. Her bleach blonde hair glimmered in the morning sunlight, framing her rosy cheeks.

“I’ve already got it started.” I chuckled loud enough for her. She pumped her fist victoriously into the air, disappearing back into the house. I could hear her feet pattering down the spiral stairwell before she joined me on the patio.

“It’s chilly out.” She shivered, closing the sliding door behind her.

“It’s warmer than Boston.” I laughed.

“That’s right. You did have a bad winter.” She frowned.

“One of the worst in history.” I added, recalling the heavy snow we’d received. It still covered the ground, even after my flight carried me to Japan.

“I think it’s ready.” She murmured, fingertips resting on the glass door as she peered inside. She glanced back toward me, urging me inside as she raced to the coffee pot. I grabbed two mugs from the cupboard, handing her one and filling the other with water. I placed it into the microwave, setting the timer for three minutes.

“I just don’t understand how someone can dislike coffee.” She tutted, bringing her steaming glass to her lips, blowing the steam away.

“I blame my grandmother.” I chuckled, “She was a major tea pusher.” I explained, reminiscing about her nightmarish tales of tea ceremonies as I stuffed the tea infuser with loose leaf chai.

“My fiancé is coming over today.” Saya informed me, moving to the table with a slice of toast.

“Oh? I can’t wait to meet him! I’ve heard so much about him!” I grinned as the microwaved dinged. I grabbed the boiling water, dunking the ball of tea into it. I knew she was dating a musician, but I wasn’t really into the same music as Saya. She preferred pop while I listened to darker styles.

“He’s been on tour for a while.” She explained, “He’s got a gig in Kyoto tomorrow, so he and the guys are all settling in tonight.” She shrugged.

“Maybe I should sightsee tonight then? Give you two some alone time?” I smirked, wriggling my brows. She laughed, covering her mouth.

“What kind of host would I be if I didn’t take you sightseeing?!”

“I suppose you have a point.” I nodded, removing the infuser from my tea and taking a sip. Perfection.

“What time will he be over?” I asked.

“2:00 or 3:00.” She shrugged. I nodded, glancing at the clock. 6:30 AM.

“I’ll have to meet him once I get back!” I grinned, rising from my seat and grabbing my briefcase from the couch.

“You off to class already?” She questioned. I nodded, slipping my shoes on and checking my hair in the mirror. The light brown, wavy locks reached my chest as I flipped them behind my back, wrapping a scarf around my neck.

“I don’t want to be late on my first week.” I chuckled, tugging my jacket around my shoulders. I took one last look in the mirror, inspecting every freckle of my face. I was one of the only Asians I knew with a body littered with freckles-the only trait I’d received from my mother.

“Return safely.” Saya smiled from the table before I ducked out the doorway. I hopped into my rental, quickly driving toward the local community college.



As Rhu left, my phone suddenly started vibrating. Setting my mug down, I flicked on the device to answer the call. It was Kyo.

“Moshi moshi!” I answered in a singsong voice.

“Where are you?” He practically growled. Someone forgot their manners.

“I’m at home, since no one told me you’d boarded the plane!” I snapped, narrowing my eyes. I specifically asked them to shoot me a text before their flight left. I knew what time they were leaving, but that was beside the point. They couldn’t do one little thing for me.

“What the fuck are you doing there?! We’re at the airport!” He shouted. He really knew how to push my buttons.

“Well I’m leaving now. Maybe next time someone could text me before you leave?” I grumbled, pouring my coffee into a travel mug and hunting down my keys. I ignored whatever slew of curses came out of his mouth, hanging up my phone to leave through the door. I had a long drive ahead of me, but they had an even longer wait ahead of them. Maybe they’ll start listening to me now?

About an hour passed before I finally reached the guys. I made sure to call Shinya, knowing he would be the least pissed with me.

“I’m here.” I sighed into the receiver as he picked up.

“Oh! You’re sooner than I expected!” I could hear the smile to his tone.

“I’m in the main lobby area, where are you?”

“We just finished eating and we’re about to head that way. Sorry about Kyo.” He quickly added, “He’s in one of his moods.” He frowned. Great.

“How is everyone else?” I questioned, curious about who else wanted to kill me.

“They’re good, once they had something to eat.” He laughed. “I told them to eat something before we left, but they didn’t want to shit on the plane.” He sniggered.

“Oh you boys.” I chuckled, finding a bench to make myself comfortable while I waited.

I spied Die’s red mop of hair first. It really stood out. Kaoru and Shinya were at his side-Shinya immediately spotted me and was waving like a mad man. I couldn’t help but wave back. Finally, Toshiya came into view. He had a hood pulled over his head and was hunched in exhaustion. Despite that, he still managed to flash his crooked smile at me, sending my heart racing. His dark eyes shone brilliantly, even from this distance. I couldn’t wait to be held in his strong arms.

“Are you just going to sit there, staring like an idiot?” Kyo griped, interrupting my train of thoughts. He stood in front of me, hands in his pockets as he tapped his toes impatiently.

“Sorry, I didn’t see you there.” I smirked, noticing the fury in his eyes.

“Let’s just go.” He growled, moving past me to leave the airport. The other guys joined soon after, but not before greeting me with hugs.

“I missed you!” I exclaimed, referring to everyone. It had been a long tour.

“I missed you more.” Toshiya added with a wink, throwing an arm around me as we all exited the building together. I wrapped my own around his torso, happy to have him home. We reached the van where the guys managed to stuff their luggage and bodies inside.

“So, where to next? I’m sure you need to unpack?” I questioned, referring to the immense amount of luggage everyone was dragging around-instruments, equipment, clothing, etc. Where’s a roadie when you need one?

“My place.” Die answered. “Kaoru and Shinya are crashing with me tonight.”

“Okay. So am I dropping everyone off at Die’s?” I questioned, glancing toward Toshiya. I’d hoped he would want to spend some time alone together.

“That’s the plan!” Kaoru answered. “We have few last minute things to discuss for the upcoming show.”

“Okay.” I fought not to frown, but Toshiya could sense my disappointment.

“I’ll be over tonight.” He smiled, “I just want to unwind.” He explained, resting a hand on my thigh as I drove us to Die’s. I pursed my lips tightly, but I’m sure my face gave away the thoughts in my mind. Didn’t you just spend several months unwinding with the guys?

“I’ll be sure to drop him off.” Die added with a wink.

“Thanks.” I muttered. Toshiya shot me a look, obviously picking up on my agitation.

Die’s place wasn’t quite as far as mine. We both lived in Kyoto, but on opposite sides. It took us about 25 minutes to reach it. Soon, everyone and everything poured from the van, leaving it empty.

“Thanks for picking us up!” Kaoru waved, holding the door open for me as I went to leave. But before I could, Kyo brushed past us to light up a cigarette on the front porch. That’s when I noticed the blooming specs of red on his white shirt.

“Are you going to need Kyo for tonight’s discussion?” I interrupted, eyes on his injury. He glanced up at me, confusion on his face.

“Huh? Well I suppose not really. We were doing some instrument maintenance-flight always screws them up.” Kaoru responded, matter-of-factly.

“Good.” I turned my attention to Kyo, “You’re coming with me.” Taking hold of his arm. His cigarette hung loosely from his lips, a scowl forming.

“The hell I am.” He growled, narrowing his eyes.

“That…” I pointed to his bleeding ribcage, “Needs tended to. Unless you want to postpone the Japan leg of your tour due to your idiot singer getting an infection?” I smirked. He grumbled, but caved. We headed for the van, waving goodbye to the rest of the guys.

“I don’t know why you have to do that…” I mumbled, referring to his self-injuring as we drove away. He rested his chin in his palm, attention on the passing scenery. He was obviously ignoring me. I frowned to myself, continuing our silent journey.



“Well this place is as cozy as ever.” Kyo scoffed, stamping his feet as he trudged through the front door.

“Take off your shoes!” I huffed, slipping off my own as I hung my jacket on the hook. He let out a sharp exhale, kicking them off in the living room. I rolled my eyes. “Make yourself comfortable.” I muttered, disappearing to retrieve my first aid kit from the bathroom.

“Do you want regular or dissolving stitches?” I questioned, eyes skimming over the large box in my hands.

“Doesn’t matter.” He sighed. He stood before me, leaning against the couch. It would have been casual had his torso not been bare-showing off his slim, well-toned figure. I fought against the urge to blush at the sight. His attention was on the multiple razor lines cutting deep into the skin of his rib cage. Blood trickled down his abdomen, dripping onto the low waistline of his black pants.

“It must have opened again.” He muttered, wiping the blood away with his hand. I quickly took hold of it, my eyes meeting his almond ones. I let my mouth fall open, but for some reason, no words could escape. His fingers delicately held mine for a moment before shoving my hand away. I quickly shook my head, coming to my senses.

“I don’t know if I can stitch this…” I muttered, eyes on his injury. “It’s deep, but there isn’t one single laceration.” I frowned. He’d obviously taken a razor blade to his torso time and time again.

“Can you just glue it so I can go?” He grumbled. I huffed, pushing him toward the bathroom.

“We need to clean it up first. It’s full of lint.” I instructed, shoving him onto the toilet seat and filling a basin with warm water.

I cleaned up the area as he leaned back. He never flinched, not even after dabbing him with hydrogen peroxide. I only did it in hopes that it would prevent him from doing this again…I guess I’d have no such luck. I managed to seal the wound shut, sending him to the living room until everything dried. I cleaned up my mess, collecting gauze and tape before returning to his side.

“I just need to put this on, then you can go.” I uttered, applying the last of the dressings.

“Thanks Saya.” Kyo whispered. “…And sorry about earlier. On the phone…and at the airport.” He muttered the last part, avoiding my gaze. I smiled to myself, doing my best to ignore my racing heart.

“I prefer this Kyo.” I responded, noticing how his lips turned into a crooked grin. He threw on his shirt before ruffling my hair.

“Don’t!” I exclaimed, shoving him away.

“Ittai!” He playfully shouted.



“I’m back! Class let out early!” I hollered, heading in through the door as I slipped my shoes off and tossed my bag onto the couch.

“Ittai!” A male’s voice huffed, both he and Saya rising from the couch. She had a surprised look on her face.

“Oh! I didn’t expect you to be home so early!” She squeaked, a blush on her face matching mine. The male had a messy mop of blonde hair.

“I’m sorry, I should have called!” I quickly turned away, wishing to unsee what I’d seen. “I make a great first impression…” I grumbled, quickly jolting upstairs.

“Rhu! I’m sorry!” Saya yelled.

“I’ll be down in a minute!” I breathed, clutching my mouth at the top of the stairs.

“It’s not what it looks like!” Saya explained, rushing to my side. I glanced at her, a confused look plastered to my face.

“No no. I should have called.” I sighed. “I knew you hadn’t seen him in a few months. I figured this would happen…I just wasn’t expecting it to happen on the couch…” I blushed, glancing back at her. She had a confused look on her face.

“You thought…Oh Rhu. Kyo isn’t my boyfriend. He’s just a close friend. We weren’t hooking up…I was just patching up a wound.” She explained. Now I was confused, and she could tell. “Here, just come back down.” She sighed.

“I will…I didn’t just run up here out of embarrassment though. I need to use the restroom.” I whispered, gesturing to the package of tampons I held in hand.

“Oh! Well take your time! I’ll introduce you once you’re done!” She bowed, quickly returning downstairs before I disappeared into the bathroom. I eventually made my way to their side, introducing myself.

“Hi, I’m Rhu.” I bowed, greeting the blonde haired man. He was built rather small. In fact, I stood taller than him. He and Saya appeared to be the same height. His face was full of piercings, and his arms covered in heavy tattoos. There was a spot of blood on his white shirt, about where his ribs would be. He had a permanent scowl plastered onto his face, but bowed in return.

“Kyo.” He muttered. He was soft spoken. He looked familiar somehow.

“It’s nice to meet you.” I smiled.

“Kyo is a close friend of mine. He also sings in the same band as Toshiya. Toshiya is my fiancé-he should be here soon.” She explained.

“Oooh.” I nodded in understanding. “Well, it is still a pleasure to meet you.” I grinned.

“And the couch…well I was just fixing him up.” She explained, lifting his shirt to reveal a well-toned, slim torso…oh and bandages covering just below his ribs.

“I think she gets the picture.” He grumbled, shoving her hand away and tugging his shirt over his stomach. I felt a blush at my cheeks again.

“Well I’m going to return to my room. I’ve got some papers to grade!” I muttered before ducking out. It was true, in fact there were 30 to sift through. This was going to be a long night…

Several hours passed before I made it 2/3 of the way through the pile of papers. My brain had reached its limit, and my stomach protested along with it. Sighing, I left my desk to hunt down a meal in the kitchen. Saya was nowhere to be seen. Kyo had left hours ago. I reheated leftovers in the microwave, spooning yogurt into my mouth as I waited.

A doorbell sounded out from the hallway, distracting me from the meal turning before me.
“That must be Toshiya!” I overheard Saya squeal. She must have been in her bedroom, judging by the pattering of her feet as she raced down the stairwell.

“Hi baby!” She squeaked, accompanied by another male’s voice. I had assumed it to be Toshiya.

“Oh I missed you!” He bellowed. Curious, I peeked down the hall to see Saya being scooped up in a slender pair of arms. A tall, lanky man spun her around in the landing; his short, dark hair tangling with hers.

I noticed another figure behind the two. He was an average sized man, with an attractive smile plastered to his face. His dark eyes shone brilliantly, and his familiar blood red hair stuck up in a Mohawk. We made eye contact, and my breath caught in my throat. I suddenly realized why Kyo looked so familiar.

I was in the same home as Dir en Grey