I'll Make You See It Was All Real

Cristiano’s Pov.

This can’t be happening. I can’t be hearing this. She didn’t know. She was really considering an abortion. How could she be thinking this? This isn’t the Lucy I know. She’s made to be a mother.

“I can’t do this Cristiano. I can’t have a child. I’d be a horrible mother” she says looking away from me. “That’s ridiculous. You’ll make a wonderful mother to our child” I say. “Maybe I don’t want your child” she snaps and my heart sinks.

I’m the problem I think.
“I know you hate me Lucy, but this baby is more important than you and me. You’ll love the baby” I say. “I’ll love it and it will leave me” I hear her whisper and I frown. What’s that meant to mean?

“Lucy” I say in shock. “I shouldn’t have come here” she says and I stop her from moving to stand. “But you did. And we need to talk about this” he says blocking me from standing. “There’s nothing to talk about. Now move” she says. “I’m not finished” I say. She can’t really think she can come in here and tell me she’s carrying my chid and I won’t want to talk about it. “Well I’m finished with you” she says. “Forget about us” I say. “There is no us” she shouts. “Then think about the baby. How amazing this is” I say. She has to have imagined how amazing this is. “I haven’t been able to stop thinking about the baby since I found out” she says. “When did you find out? I ask and she tells me yesterday. Yesterday I think. But it’s been weeks since…“You really expect me to believe you didn’t know. You’ve got to be at least…

“9 weeks. Just my luck to get knocked up the last time we slept together” she says.
“9 weeks and three days. I know exactly how long it’s been since you walked out my front door” I say. “Well you get to see me do that again” she say standing and I manage to get to the door first. “Move” she says. “No” I say. “I can’t do it” she says.

“Lucy” I say. “Don’t. How can I have a baby? I’m a mess. It’s not fair on the baby” she says. “It’s not fair on the baby to have two parents who’ll love it, care for it and comfort it when it cries. It’s not fair on the baby to have two parents who love each other” I say. “Stop. Just stop. I don’t love you. I don’t trust you” she cries and I want to scream. I hate seeing her like this. “Lucy” I say wiping a tear from under her eye. “I always thought I’d be older. Married to someone who loves me. How do I hold the baby in my arms and know it was conceived from a lie” she cries and I think I’m going to sick.

No matter what I say she won’t listen to me. She rushes out to her car and she just won’t listen to me.

“You are carrying my child. Do you expect me to just ignore you? To be happy that you want to get rid of our baby” I yell. “I don’t know what I want” she yells back. “Please Lucy. Don’t make any rush decisions. I promise you it will all work out” I say kissing her forehead. “I can’t after everything” she whispers. “Nothing about how I feel about you has been a lie. I love you even more now you’re having my child” I say. It’s the truth.

“Were you going tell me?” I ask as I move away from her car door and she turns to face me. “You said yourself that you didn’t know why you came here. Were you going to tell me or just let me go about my life not knowing I could be a Dad” I say. I never would have thought she would keep something like this from me but she’s questioning whether to have the baby and I never thought she’d do that. “I’d never have kept if from you. I just needed to get my head around this” she says and I watch as her car drives off.

Twice I’ve watched her drive out the gate. And twice I’ve wanted to go to sleep and never wake up. “Cris” Nuno says appearing at the front door. “What happened?” he asks and I push past him and head to the dining room. “What are you looking for?” he asks as I fling open a press and search through it.

I pull out the bottle and unscrew the cap. “Wow. Cris take it easy” he says as I let the whiskey flow down my throat. “That’s enough” he says taking the bottle from my hand. “Give back” I say trying to get it back. “This isn’t the answer. Now tell me what the hell happened with Lucy. She looked worse leaving then she did when she arrived” he says.

“She’s pregnant” I say and his mouth drops. “Wow” he says. “My thoughts exactly” I say.

“Congratulations Cris. You’re going to be a father” he says. “But I’m not” I say pulling a chair out from the table. “What?” he asks. “She doesn’t know if she wants the baby” I say in disbelief. “But this is Lucy we are talking about. She’d make a wonderful mother” Nuno says. “She doesn’t think so” I say. “How? What? This is mad” he says. “I’ve imagined the moment she’d tell me I was going to be a father so many times. I never thought it would happen like this” I say. “You thought about kids with Lucy?” he asks. “Ya. She’s the only woman I could picture having kids with” I mumble. “Maybe she just needs time. She’s had a tough few months Cris" he says.

“I thought this year couldn’t get any worse” I say banging my head of the table. “Careful” Nuno says pulling my head up. “What’s the point?” I sigh. “The point is no matter what or not as the case is happening between you and Lucy, she will eventually come to her senses about the baby. She’s had a tough few months. She just needs time to think” he says.

“I’ve met the love of my life, had been the happiest I had ever been in my life and now I’ve lost her and now I’ve properly lost the chance to be a dad” I say. “Maybe you should get Katia or Dolores to talk to her” he says. “And get killed. Are you joking that would make things worse. I need to get her to talk to me. Not have people interfering” I say. “Cris. This is Lucy we are talking about. You didn’t think she’d ever speak to you again after that day with Merche and she did. When the shock fades she’ll make the right decision” he says.

“She thinks the baby was made from a lie. As far as she’s concerned I’m no better than her mother. And the thought that she could hate me as much as that vile woman makes me sick to my stomach” I say standing. “Where are you going?” Nuno asks. “Upstairs. I’ll give her space tonight but if she thinks I’m not going to stop fighting for her especially now then she’s wrong” I say heading to the stairs.

“Here” Nuno says placing plate with a huge slice of chocolate cake on the coffee table beside the couch I lay on. “Cake isn’t going to me feel better” I mumble. “Or less grumpy” he jokes as I look through my phone. “She still ignoring you?” he asks. “Yup” I say. “Listen Cris the cake isn’t just to cheer you up. I kind of did something….” he says put I shush him as my phone rings and I see the caller ID. “Lucy” I say sitting up.

“Can you come by my place?” she asks. “Amm ya of course. Right now?” I ask. “Ya” she says and the phone goes dead. “That was Lucy. She wants me to go to her place” I say standing and Nuno appears behind the couch with a tuber ware box. “It really should be you giving me something” he smiles. “What?” I ask. “Just take the cake with you. Chocolate might make her happier. And don’t get your hopes up Cris. It might not mean anything” he says.

But it’s better than nothing I think. “Hi” I say when she opens the door. “Hi” she says softly moving to allow me in. “How are you feeling?” I ask as she shuts the door. “Like crap but I managed to keep down my lunch so far anyway” she says and I follow her down the hallway.

“Nuno sent this if you feel up to eating it” I say holding the box out to her. “Soup and cake. What did I do to earn all this attention from Nuno today?” she says taking the box from me. “Soup?” I ask confused. “He dropped by my office at lunch. That’s the reason you are here. I told him I’d ask you something and as soon as you have answered it you can go because I haven’t the energy to talk. Especially as something as serious as the baby” she says taking a seat on the couch.

“So you aren’t opposed to talking about the baby another time?” I ask in hope. “I need time Cris” she says and I nod. The longer time she takes the more likely she won’t make any rash decisions that I know she’ll regret.

“So what did Nuno tell you to ask me?” I ask taking a seat on the other end of the couch. “Why were you at Angelo’s the day Tina destroyed your car?” she asks. Shit I think staring at the wall.

“Cristiano” she says. I turn my head to look at her. She looks so comfy in her jeans and Liverpool sweatshirt. A little tired but still beautiful. “Cris will you answer me because your making me nervous” she says.

“I was there to see you” I whisper facing the wall.