What Goes Around Comes Back Around

This sucked. I was a fat hormonal mess and my boyfriend was traveling the country on a tour bus, playing music with his best friends and my brother.

We had planned for me to go visit them the two days they were in New York, but that was towards the end of the tour one more month from now. It was also inconvenient, cause we wanted to tell everyone that I was pregnant when I was three months, which was coming up in a few days, and we wouldn't even be together to tell anyone.

I was just laying on my bed, rubbing my belly, thinking about Andy and mentally complaining about how fat I was getting when my phone rang. I sighed because my phone was on the dresser and it was so far from where I was laying, but I got up, with much effort. It was Andy.

“Hi” I sighed, laying back down on the bed.

“You sound so excited to hear me” He said.

“I am. I’m just upset with how fat I’m getting” I heard his cute laugh on the other end.

“Well babe, you're pregnant. Of course you're gaining weight.”

“Good choice of words” I told him, glad he didn’t call me fat.

“You’re not fat” He said. Damn I love him.

“You’re good”

“So anyway, I was calling because you're almost three months. Did you want me to tell the guys? I would love to share this with them.”

We hadn’t really talked about how we were gonna tell the guys. I also really wanted to tell my parents, and Marie, Elisa and Meagan. After we all got together the night before the boys all left for tour, the girls and I had gotten kind of close, even though I was already kind of close to Meagan, her being my brothers girlfriend and all.

“Thats fine, I really wanna tell my parents, and just tell the guys not to tell the girls. I wanna tell them myself.”

“Okay that sounds good. I can’t wait for this to finally be out. I just wanna scream it to the world.”

“Lets just wait until we tell our friends and family, and then we’ll scream it to the world through instagram or something.” I joked.

“Deal” He laughed. We talked for a little while longer until he had to go to soundcheck and we continued texting whenever he wasn't doing band things until he called me after the show.

The next day, I video chatted my parents, who were still living in Chicago and told them about Andy me. They had recently started to hint at me that they wanted more grandchildren so they were really happy when I told them I was pregnant.

“Oh my goodness sweetie. I was getting worried because you're coming to that age where your eggs start to be infertile” My mom said.

“Oh god mom, please don’t. Any way don’t get to excited, this might be the only grand child you get from me, I can’t stand this morning sickness.”

“Once you hold your child for the first time, you’ll change your mind honey, theres really nothing like it. It’s quite amazing.”

My dad came to my defense and got my mom to stop freaking me out with all this baby talk.

“Well we’re really happy for you sweetie, does your brother know about all of this?” He asked.

“Yeah, he actually found out before we were able to tell him. And I bet you can just imagine how that went.” I told him.

“Yeah, Pete is definitely protective. But be thankful for that sweetie.” My mom said.

I loved talking to my parents, but I could only take so much of them, even on a computer screen. So I made some excuse to be able to hang up, and I finally got together with the girls at my house. I had this cute idea to bake a little toy baby into a cake so one of them would pull it out and I would tell them.

Elisa, Marie and Meagan finally arrived at my house and I was so nervous to tell them. Meagan brought a bottle of wine, so I bought some grape juice and white grape juice to be prepared for either white or red. It was red, which was better because the regular grape juice matched the actual wine better.

We chatted about the normal girl things the entire dinner. Until it was time for dessert. I excused myself to go cut the cake, making sure one of the slices had the baby in it.

“Oh my god is that chocolate cake?” Elisa asked, fawning over her slice.

“Indeed it is” I said. It took a few minutes, but Marie finally made a face, like something was in her cake when she took a bite.

“What the hell?” She said, pulling the toy baby from her mouth. Her eyes were wide when she realized what it was.

“Wait” She gasped, looking at me. “Are-are you?” I smiled and nodded. Elisa and Meagan didn't really realize what was going on because they didn't know what Marie pulled out of her mouth, until she finally exclaimed “Oh my god you're pregnant!”

Meagan and Elisa gasped and started smiling and hugging me.

“Wait, you’ve had like two glasses of wine” Meagan pointed out.

I handed her my glass and told her to take a sip.

“It’s fucking grape juice. Oh my god, I didn’t suspect a thing” Then she continued hugging and congratulating me with the other girls.

Since Andy and I were only dating for a little while, I definitely had to explain the situation but once it was all cleared up, they were really happy for me. Once they left, I called Andy and told him the good news. Everyone was happy and no one wanted to kill him so it was all good.

***

I was so excited to tell the guys finally. I hated keeping this secret from my best friends. I talked to Pete and told him I was gonna do this and he was ready for it too.

“Wait dude seriously! Finally! I’ve been waiting for this.” He exclaimed, “Can I help?”

“What? No. Theres nothing to help with. I was just gonna like sit them down and tell them straight up.”

“You’re no fun dude” He complained, throwing a fake little kid fit like his 6 year old son does.

“Fine. You can just tell them at soundcheck that I have something to tell them, then I will” I laughed, he seemed satisfied with that.

“Speaking of soundcheck” Pete said, hopping off his bunk, “We gotta do that”

“Oh shit” I said. Joining him off the bus to head to the stage. Right as we were finishing soundcheck, and Joe and Patrick were starting to head off stage, Pete called them over to the front of my drums.

“Hey guys wait! Our little Andy here has an announcement to make.” He smiled and gestured toward me to make the announcement.

I suddenly got a little nervous, but I was just too excited so I exclaimed with the biggest smile on my face “I’m having a kid!”

They were shocked, you could see it on their faces that it took them by surprise.

“Wait what?” Joe exclaimed.

“Jackie is pregnant” I said, with just as much excitement as before.

“Oh my god thats great!” Patrick exclaimed, throwing his hands into the air.

“How the fuck…?” Joe was still in shock.

“You doing okay Joe?” I asked, hesitant.

“I’m happy for you don’t get me wrong, but I’m just so confused. You guys just started dating.”

Pete walked up next to him and put his hand on his shoulder. “It’s a long story my friend.”

“Wait why did Pete get to know before us!” Patrick asked, not offended or hurt, kind of laughing it off.

“Dude, it’s my sister. Thats why.” He said.

“Ohhh, okay true.” Patrick nodded, acknowledging his best friends answer.

“He actually found out on his own. We were gonna tell him when we were gonna tell everyone else.” I said.

“Wow. Thanks man” Pete said.

“Aww so you're not really that special. Sorry man.” Joe joked.

We all laughed and finally headed back to the buses. I had to sit down with the Patrick and Joe and explain the entire situation. Once I finally told them about the night of the album release party and what had happened with Pete, everyone I cared about finally knew. And I didn't have to hide it anymore. I was so beyond happy.

I skyped Jackie after the show because I didn’t just want to hear her voice, I needed to see her face. I just missed her so much.

“So how did it go with the guys?” She asked.

“Great! They're all really happy. Pete actually isn't able to stop talking about the fact that he's gonna be an uncle.”

“Oh my god, what a dork.” She laughed.

“I miss hearing you laugh in person. I just miss you so much babe.” I confessed.

“I miss you too. But I get to see you in a few weeks.”

“Thats not soon enough” I complained.

“I know Andy, we just have to stay positive. At least it’s not 2 months away now. It’s getting a lot closer.” She assured me.

“This is why I love you. You make me see the brighter side to everything.”

“I love you too. We’ll be together soon baby, I promise.”

A few hours later she fell asleep on me. I loved hearing her voice when she was tired. It was sultry but she wasn’t trying which made it that much better. I stayed on for a few more minutes because I loved watching the silhouette of her chest rise and fall. It relaxed me and made me tired enough to finally fall asleep.

***

As the next three weeks dragged on, it was finally time for me to fly out to New York and see Andy. Oh yeah, and my brother. I was so excited to finally see my boyfriend, because going through a pregnancy alone sucked.

I mean technically I’m not alone, Andy has been great, and supportive. He makes sure I take my vitamins everyday and that I’m eating right. He said he’s been reading the baby books that we went to go buy and that makes me so happy. But I just don’t like experiencing this without him here with me. But I finally I get to see him and everything will be okay.

The flight was long, and very turbulent the entire way. I held in the urge to throw up on the plane, but once I was finally off the plane and in the airport, I had to rush to the nearest bathroom because I was gonna be sick.

To my surprise, Andy wasn't the one waiting for me at the gate when I landed, it was just Pete. Of course I was happy to see my brother, but me being the hormonal mess that I am, I was a little worried when Andy wasn’t there.

“Jackie!” Pete exclaimed, pulling me into a hug. He grabbed my bag for me and started leading us towards the car.

“Hi Petey” I said, “How has the tour been?”

“It’s been awesome! This one is so much fun, the Josh and Tyler are awesome, and of course its always fun to tour with Panic!” He cheered.

“Thats awesome! Where’s Andy?” I asked. I would have asked that first, but I didn't want Pete to think I wanted to see my boyfriend over my own brother, even though I did.

“I convinced him to let me pick you up myself. I missed my baby sister! I thought we could go get some food and just catch up since I feel like I haven’t seen you in forever” He suggested.

“Well, it has been like two months.”

“My point exactly!” He laughed “So what do you say? Pizza?”

“Sounds perfect” I gave in. I waited almost two months to see Andy, I could wait another two hours, even though it would kill me.