My Chemical Romance Is What?!

June 12th, 2007
Dear Paper,
It's been good these two days. Panic left but Aiden came on tour, I watched 'Dead Silence' finally, and I have more phone numbers! That is not important but oh well! wiL is my partner-in-crime now and the rest of the guys are like uncles to me. I let out that I don't like cigarettes and Gerard's curious as hell. Last night he text me four times asking me why. I think he told Frank too because he left a couple of texts too. I'm going to go get ready now. Peace
Xoxo,
Lexi.

~*~*~

I sighed and put my diary back into my messenger bag. I grabbed clothes before going into the bus's bathroom. After doing my morning shit (shower, wash face, brush teeth, brush hair) I tossed on this shirt, these pants, these shoes, and these gloves. Do you like Charlie? If you don't, too bad. I like Charlie! I tossed my dirty clothes into the hamper and grabbed my converse, the only thing I keep with me. I sighed as I opened my bunk to see Gerard sent me two more texts and Frank left only one. As I slipped my iPod into my pocket, I read Frank's text.

'We're gonna have a talk. Soon,' it said. I couldn't hear Frank, obviously, but I knew he meant it in a stern voice. I could feel a disturbance in the force. Ha-ha. I pulled a funny! As soon as I stepped out into the 'living room' I wished I would have stayed sleeping. Frank was sitting on the couch, watching TV. I was assuming Aiden was out or something because all the bunks were empty and no one else was there.

"H-hi Dad," I smiled an innocent yet guilty smile. Yeah, I'm that talented. He looked over at me and, in one movement, turned off the TV and patted the spot next to him. I sighed and sat where he directed, attention on the floor.

"Lexi," Frank started. When I didn't look up he lifted my chin with his finger.

"Lexi your not in trouble I just want to ask you something."

"If its what Gerard wants to know, I don't-" I cut myself off when I saw his face. It read 'explain-now'. I let out a sigh and looked down.

"I don't like cigarettes because I had a close friend of mine smoked one, got addicted, and then died of lung cancer. That's also how my mom started her crack addiction. She smoked cigarettes, her friend gave her one filled with crack, she smoked it, got addicted, and started to beat me when she didn't have it," I whispered, silent tears rolling down my face.

"I don't want it to happen again. What if you guys die or do the same as my mom?" I sobbed. Frank brought me into a hug as my tears streaked my face. He forced me to look at him as he stared straight into my eyes.

"Lexi, I never want you to think like that again. No one's going to die and no one's going to hurt you. I would never hurt you, nobody else would either. We love you and nothing's going to change that." I nodded and after I collected my posture, Frank and I walked off the bus smiling. Gerard opened his mouth to say something but Frank gave him a stare that said 'I'll-explain-later'. He nodded and went back to talking with wiL, Mikey, Matt, and Jake D..

~*~Three Hours Later~*~

"You cheater! That's not fair!" wiL yelled at me. I giggled at him as he stormed off. Angel rose an eyebrow at me from across the room.

"I beat him in War," I explained him unasked question as I shuffle the cards. He nodded and went back to reading. Right now I'm backstage in the huge dressing room while My Chem was eating (I already did) and Avenged was finishing up.

"Let's play poker!" wiL exclaimed as he came back. I raised an eyebrow but dealt anyways. After 12 rounds, wiL learned one of two things. Either he sucks at card games or I just can kick anyone's ass. By the way: it's the first one. Soon Avenged walked in, well minus Brian. I was told he was at a bar. We continued to mess around while Avenged took their showers. Suddenly the backstage door was opened and Brian drunkly stumbled in with a thing attached at his hip. My face twisted with disgust as I looked at her. She was a bleached blond with a skirt that didn't even reach her mid thigh and four inch heels. She was sucking on his neck, completely ignoring everyone staring.

"Hey guys. This is Ashley," he slurred out. Everyone kind of waved and turned back to what they were doing. I continued to stared with a look of disapproval.

"Whore," I muttered as I stood and headed for the door.

"What did you call me?" the chick screeched. Everyone, including me, turned to stare at her.

"Did I seem to stutter? If you think I did then someone's surprisingly stupider than they look," I replied with venom in my voice.

"Syn baby! Are you gonna let her talk to me like that?!" she demanded staring at Brian wide eyed.

"Lady, shut the fuck up. He doesn't care about you, all he cares about is a quick fuck. You will be long forgotten a day from now. So don't you dare speak like you give a shit about him or anyone here for that matter. Your just something he found on a corner," I snapped. Suddenly I felt a pain across my right cheek as my head turned to the left. I slowly turned my head, horror in my eyes as I saw Brian glaring at me.

"Don't you talk to her like that!" he yelled at me. I took a step back as Zacky spoke up.

"Brian! Calm the fuck down!" he yelled at the drunk Brian.

"You need to fucking piss off! No one here cares about you! Frank and the guys just took you in as a fucking charity case! Frank cares more about his guitar than a piece of shit like you! I never cared about you, your just a little good-for-nothing brat!" Brian yelled, ignoring the shocked faces and glares he was getting. I knew he was just drunk but that hit me hard. I could feel the tears brimming my eyes before they slipped down my cheeks. Brian suddenly became more sober and shoved the grinning Ashley off him.

"Wait. Lexi I-" I didn't bother to listen to him finish. I ran out the door and out of the venue all together.

"LEXI!" Someone yelled out from behind me. I didn't have to turn around to know Johnny was chasing after me, along with Frank who just showed up with the rest of My Chem. I ran faster and dashed down a random street.

This is too bad of a habit. running from all my problems.