He's My Savior

Life isn't that bad...
Unless you're me.

Hi, I'm Ellie McKinnon.

Yep, McKinnon. I'm Jeremy from A Day To Remember's younger sister.

We're thirteen years apart.. I was like five when he moved out, but I still remember those days when he lived here like they were yesterday.

When Jeremy lived here, everything always went smoothly. Nobody fought. I remember the day he left like it was five seconds ago.

Dad got angry. Mom got angry. Over what? I'm not sure. Bookshelves were broken. Things were thrown.

Jeremy doesn't visit often, and when he does, our parents act totally cool. Like nothing changed after he left except the fact that his room was empty.

Jeremy's never seen the dark side.

To this day, I don't know what my parents are fighting about. I've been living with this fighting for eleven years.

I've wanted to hurt myself, I won't even lie. I've thought about it. It just never happened. I'm kind of proud of myself for that.

Tomorrow, Jeremy's coming home. I asked him not to tell Mom and Dad he was returning. He agreed. Every time he comes home, our parents put the bookshelf back together, put the couch cushions back, and put all the forks in the sink.

He's going to walk in, there will be books scattered galore, couch cushions on the floor, and forks randomly scattered throughout the house.

Why are they're forks on the floor, you ask? They throw them at each other. Nobody's gotten hurt... yet. I actually got hit in the foot with one once, though.

I guess I forgot to mention my age. If you're good at math, you'd already know I was sixteen.

I'm not good at math either, don't worry.

That reminds me, I'm actually about to fail math since I never show up. I guess I should start going to class. It's just that.. there's this kid in there that always makes fun of me. It's kind of amusing to me, but the teachers always try to get involved and call him out on 'bullying' me. I don't really care, he's not affecting my life.

The only class I pay attention in is English. I've always enjoyed writing. Every ELA teacher I've ever had has told me that if the job I really want fails, I could always be a writer.

I really want to be a photographer. Preferably a music photographer. I like catching people in the action of making other people happy. I've seen a lot of pictures of my brother shot by Adam Elmakias. Adam is amazing at what he does, and I really hope that one day I get to meet him.

Anyway, enough blabbing about my life. Nobody really even cares anyway. Jeremy needs to hurry himself up and get here. Mom and Dad just got into another one of their 'lets throw pans at each other' fights.

My mom actually hit me once. I had to skip school for a week and wait for the mark to go away. That's another reason I'm failing math, I'm kind of forced to skip school sometimes. Whether it's because I'm afraid to walk by my parents in the mornings, or because I have to hide a mark.

Most people love skipping school and are thrilled by it. For me... well, I'd rather be in school honestly. I wont't get hurt there, I won't get screamed at. Or if I do, it's by someone who basically means nothing to me and I'll never have to look at them again after I graduate.

Okay, fine! I'm confessing. They hit me a lot.

Not once, twice, but... a lot.

I can't tell Jeremy. He can't know.

If Jeremy doesn't get here soon, I'm just gonna give up and go insane.