Sleepwalking

{Alex}

Interviews were never my favorite thing to do alone -- or at all. I felt awkward and under a weird level of surveillance. I always liked having Jack with me to do them. He was the funny one -- I just fed off of him. Funny came natural to Jack, not so much for me.

To matters easier, though, my interview for today was with an old friend -- Anthony (Tony) Grey. He worked for Alternative Press. He was always fun and comfortable, though I still wished Jack was here. I knew in my heart that we were doing the right thing, though.

"Alex!" Tony said excitedly as I walked into his apartment. He was sitting on his couch with his laptop across his knees. He sat it to the side and stood up, walking towards me.

"Hey, man!" I said, hugging him. "How're you?" I asked

"Good, good. You?" He said excitedly, smiling at me.

I nodded and shrugged. "I'm... alright."

He nodded and smiled again. "Well, I've been looking forward to this for the last two weeks!" He said, leading me into his 'studio' after getting me a glass of water.

"Same, man. I love doing these with you. You're like a slightly more appropriate Bryan Stars." I chuckled as we sat on the small couch. He already had his camera set up and we were ready to go.

"What's up, you all? I'm Tony Grey, you're AP correspondent! Today I have a very special interview for you guys. I've got Alex Gaskarth from All Time Low here with me today." He said excitedly.

I smiled and waved a small wave to the camera. "Hi." I chimed, dragging the word out.

"We're here in the ever sunny-"

"It's raining, Tony." I scoffed, smirking playfully.

"-the ever rainy Baltimore, Maryland! It's three days before the start of the Runaways Tour that All Time Low will be headlining this Spring, with special guests Issues, Set It Off and Pvris. How are you, Alex?" He asked, turning to me with a small smile on his face.

"I'm doing okay, Tony. There's been a lot going on lately, but hell, it's all just part of it." I shrugged. I knew exactly where this conversation was going -- to Jack, or to what I admitted earlier that month on stage.

"You're right. Before we get into that stuff though, let's talk touring, yeah? Who are you most excited, out of the other bands, to hang out with?"

I hummed gently and frowned a bit, thinking. "Honestly, would it be too cliche if I said everyone? But for different reasons, of course. Like, Tyler Carter from Issues is someone that Jack and I are going to go party with in every city, or sit around and drink a beer and play music. He's fun and definitely brings something new to the table every time we all hang out. Michael is definitely a trip as well. He's a great guy.

Lynn Gunn is an angel. She's one of the sweetest girls I know. She's fun to sit around with and write songs with, watch movies with, play shows with -- she'll be doing Remembering Sunday with us on this tour which I'm really excited about -- and she's just all around good company to keep. Brian from Pvris is really fun to play games with. We went to the Warped Tour Show last year in Boston and me and him sat on the Pvris bus and played football games for literally six hours straight and missed about half of the festival that day. Good guy, love him.

Then you have the guys from Set It Off. They're a mess. They like their pranks and their jokes. They're always off doing things, whether it be acoustic sets, meeting fans, running around Walmart and missing bus call, or doing whatever. They aren't around a lot on tours, so I've heard, but they definitely make their presence known when they are. They're some fun guys, they like their parties, but they like their chill bonfire type vibes, too. They're a lot of fun, as well."

Tony nodded and laughed, rolling his eyes. "I interviewed Maxx from Set It Off about three months ago right after this tour was announced and I don't think you're ready for the tour pranks that are about to come your way, Alex."

"Honestly, probably not."

"Well, let's move right along then. You all are about to release your next album, Future Hearts, right? You've only previously released a song to go with the title of the tour, correct? Runaways?"

I nodded and shuffled a bit in my seat. "Right. We released the song because we figured that with all of the new things we're playing on this tour, they should at least know the song that the tour is named after, you know?"

"Absolutely! Is there any chance that within the next month before the album comes out, a track could be added or taken off?" Tony asked with a small smirk on his face.

I laughed and shook my head. "No, I don't think so, really. There's always room for another track if the need arises, but really, we spent a good four days going through about twenty songs to pick for the album and we narrowed it down to a good twelve. My lucky number is thirteen though, so I'd love to be able to add another song, but I don't think we will. I think we're all set for this album. Maybe next."

He nodded and looked down at his phone at a few questions, presumably from Twitter. "Alright, is it cool if we take some fan questions?"

"Of course!"

He nodded and hummed. "Okay, here we go. This is one from twitter. It says, 'Ask Alex why he felt like the Nashville show was the best place for him to announce the thing.' Wait, what thing?

I sighed and ran my hand over my face in frustration. "Three months ago at a small show we played in Nashville with our buddies from Neck Deep, I admitted that I'm pansexual, which is why I've been avoiding twitter and social media a much as possible.." I said slowly.

"Oh." Tony said, his eyes going slightly wide. "I had no idea, I've been kind of out of the loop lately."

I shrugged and smiled at him. "No big deal, man, it's not something I go around promoting. Basically, Jack said something about gay pride because there was a sign in the crowd that said 'we're seeing you for our honeymoon' and it was these two really cute girls that had just gotten married and basically I said, 'I'm so glad we can get married -- that people like us can be people.' I said I was pansexual or whatever, after. After that, the crowd went crazy and twitter went crazy and Alternative Press had an article written by the end of the concert and it was on the stupid news segment on AXSTV and it was everywhere. It's been three months and it's still everywhere."

"Alex, man, I can edit this section out of the video if you want. I'm sorry, I didn't know." Tony said, putting a hand on my shoulder.

I smiled and shook my head, "Oh, no! It's fine. It's not a big deal, I'm over it. I don't care all that much."

"Awesome, want to move on?" I nodded and he searched for a question again. I was getting nervous, slightly. I hated serious questions, that's why I liked doing interviews with Jack. He was good at making serious questions fun and easier to answer. "Okay, this was from instagram. 'What can Alex tell us about Jack and his situation? Love you, Alex and the rest of the guys.'"

I sighed and shrugged, biting at my bottom lip for a second as I thought about what to say. "All I can say is that a lot has been going on the last month or so. Jack is fine. There is nothing wrong with Jack. He's still as lovely as ever. Something happened that really hit home with Jack the other night and I just made the choice to convince him to get some help before tour. However, he won't make the start of tour, but he'll definitely make it a few weeks from now. It's all a big misunderstanding, I promise. Nothing to be concerned about. Jack is fine, I'm fine, Zack and Rian are fine. Everything."

"Good. I'm really glad. I was texting Rian yesterday to check up on Jack and see what he knew. It's nice to have your reassurance, though."

"My reassurance?"

Tony nodded and laughed. "Yeah. Jalex is a lovely blessing."

I knew Tony was joking but the statement made my stomach flip. I couldn't tell if it was in a good way or a bad way. "Oh? Yeah? Noted. When he gets out I'll take a video of us making out and I'll send it to you, buddy." I joked.

"Cool, I'll be waiting."

I smiled and sat with him for the next hour discussing tours, my writing inspiration, pre-show rituals and everything in between. When I left Tony's house I felt relieved yet an odd sense of sadness. I never left interviews alone. Jack and I would always head to the closest Chinese place and eat. It was a tradition.

When I left the interview I was graced with time to actually think about what had happened earlier in the week. I felt sorry for Jack but I hated that he felt sorry for himself. I just wanted him to work on what was going on and to fix it. I wanted things to get better for him. I wanted things to get better for us.

I grabbed my wallet from my car and went into the closest Chinese place, asking for a table for one.