Keep Cool, Stay Tough

“Cesc, I promise this is really important, we are talking about my sanity over here, I have not slept all night,” I insisted as soon as I heard his voice.

I was sitting outside on the front porch tying up my shoelaces, my eyes occasionally glancing up and down the empty street. I had finally invested in a nice, new pair of running shoes and matching outfits that I was excited to break in. I pretended that somewhere in London, Cesc was doing the same thing, even though it was far more likely that he was still in bed cursing me. I had my headphones secured in my ears as I pressed the volume up as Cesc had the tendency to whisper in the mornings.

“Anytime you call me this early in the morning it’s always about something important, even when you called just to tell me Cristiano Ronaldo doesn’t like you, and anyway, I’ve been awake for at least ten minutes,” Cesc’s words were broken apart by a yawn, but I still caught the main gist.

I was a little more than surprised that he had been awake before I had called, “Why? That’s not like you.”

He sighed, sidestepping the question, which was an irritating norm of his, “Why didn’t you sleep all night?”

“Right, remember when we were dating?”

“Yeah, I vaguely remember something about that,” Cesc spoke sarcastically.

I forgot how crabby he could get in the mornings.

“Which one of us wanted to keep it a secret?”

“Both of us,” He replied instantly.

“Really?” I jumped up and tilted my head, frozen to the spot trying to remember if that was actually true.

“Yeah, well we talked about telling a wider circle of people and being a little less secretive, and sometimes you wanted to tell people, I talked you down, and then I wanted to tell people, but you talked me down. We were never actually on the same page at the time,” Cesc explained.

“Yeah, but who else would you even need to tell, I mean Geri, Thiago, and Leo knew,” I pointed out as I jumped to my feet and began to jog down the street picking up my pace at every step.

“Hey, they are just as much your friends as they are mine, even more yours at this point, so don’t make it seem like you were doing me any special favors by telling them,” Cesc reminded with a forceful tone.

“I’m not, geez, Cesc, why are you in such a crap mood this morning? Is everything alright with you?”

“Well, maybe you aren’t the only one not getting any sleep, Senna. Maybe there’s more going on in my life than these chats we’ve been having,” Cesc’s tone grew harsh, harsher than I had ever heard before.

“That’s why I’m asking you if you’re alright,” I repeated.

“I just need to sleep,” He snapped.

I stopped running, “Fine, go sleep Cesc, I honestly didn’t mean to disturb you, I didn’t realize I was disturbing you actually, and don’t expect any calls from me in the future.”

I hung up the phone immediately afterwards, turned on my running mix, and burst into a run with X Ambassadors blasting into my ears. I promised Mina one final morning for her to sleep in, on the condition that she came to the training complex with Martha and me. So I was on my own, and I couldn’t be more grateful to have this murky morning all to myself.

By the time I got back, Martha and Mina were just getting up and the smell of strong coffee was already wafting out of the kitchen. Martha cornered me while I was drinking water with the strangest look that made me try to recall if I had been up to anything too shady in the last day or so.

“I don’t know what you talked to her about, but thank you, you can’t imagine how happy I am that Mina is going to come and help out at the clinic again,” She clapped her hands together with a wide smile as I sighed in relief. I smiled wider as Martha hugged me, screw Cesc, I had more important things to concern myself with, he had already broken my heart once, I wasn’t going to give him the power to have at it again.

“We just talked,” I insisted, “I’m just kicking myself that it took so long.”

“Better late than never, believe me,” Martha returned as chipper as I’d ever seen her, “She even mentioned something about getting a pair of running shoes to join you some mornings.”

I nodded, “Yup, I’m going to make her start running with me, the first few times will be hell, but it’ll be really great for her.”

“Yeah, I mean look at you, you’re so fit, and you can put away a proper meal no problems,” Martha admired.

“Aw, you’ve noticed, I’m flattered,” I giggled.

Mina walked back into the kitchen dressed for the day ahead and made a direct beeline towards the coffee pot. We stood around having a rushed breakfast before hitting the road with takeaway cups of coffee in tow.

On the drive over, Cesc had sent an apology text. I didn’t respond. I had spent the entire morning putting Mina’s relationship with Gonzalo under a microscope over analyzing all sorts of minute details and what ifs she had mentioned. Point was Cesc came up short in most categories. Even the way Mina had her heart broken, you couldn’t put the blame on Gonzalo entirely.

And it’s not like I’m saying I was some innocent that had her heart shattered by some cruel guy, no, and I don’t know why I never asked him, but when this argument eventually blows over, I am going to ask him…why didn’t he ever tell me himself that he was dating someone new?

Martha stayed with Mina and me for maybe five minutes, and then she was called onto the pitch where Varane and Bale had clashed together. We followed after in case there might something that needed to be done.

Out on the grassy pitch, all it took was one person saying ‘is that Mina’ and she was almost instantly surrounded by a crowd of white and blue. Martha and I were the only ones standing beside the injured players.

Imagine my shock and indignant bewilderment when out of all the players that came by to greet her, most of which she waved at, high-fived, or fist-bumped, but no, the one player that she chose to hug just had to be Cristiano. She just walked, practically ran, right up to him, and threw her arms around him and he kissed her cheek.

“Welcome back,” He gave one last tight squeeze before letting her go.

“It’s about time, I would say,” Mina replied, blushing, but grinning ear to ear.

I didn’t realize I was grinding my teeth until Sergio nudged me out of it.

“What brought this on?” He nodded towards Mina who was still carrying on a conversation with Cristiano.

“I’m drowning in work and I don’t get to play hooky as often as I’d like without making it obvious, I needed some help,” I explained.

“I could’ve done stuff,” Sergio pointed out.

“Thank you, that’s sweet, but you have more important things to do.”

“Fucking team building bullshit exercises,” Sergio muttered.

I laughed, “Yeah, those.”

Martha needed help with getting Gareth inside to be looked at; Raphael had walked away with a light bruise that would just need to be iced. Cristiano and Sergio volunteered to help Gareth into the clinic. Mina and I trailed behind as Gareth recounted the tackle for the second time to Martha.

I poked Mina and shook my hands in the air, nodding towards Cristiano as I hissed as quietly as I could, “What the hell was that?”

She smiled, and didn’t lower her voice, “He knows.”

I raised my eyebrows; my nostrils flared, and came to a standstill, “You are fucking with me.”

Mina shook her head, laughing as she did so.

“He’s known early on too,” She added.

“Why?”

“Can you come in here please, Mina?” Martha called.

“I’ll be right back?”

“Why him?” I called after her.

Part of Mina’s job description was observing players during routine checkups. She had disappeared with Martha and Gareth, leaving me alone in the front room with Cristiano for company. I couldn’t stop staring at him.

“What’s with the look?” Cristiano nodded towards me.

“Why?” I asked, simply astounded by the revelation.

“If you want a legitimate answer, you should probably be a little more specific?” He returned with that impassive expression of his.

I could barely hear him past my own thoughts. Although, I couldn’t help noting that if he didn’t want you to read his expression, you would have absolutely no idea what he was feeling or thinking about. It was a maddening, but useful trait to have. My dad used to always say that you could always read my emotions in my eyes.

“I just don’t understand, why not Iker, or even Karim, why tell you? Why not someone not so obsessed with themselves? Why not tell someone actually useful?”

He realized what I was talking about immediately after that.

“I’m pretty sure Karim knew at some point too, but he’s probably forgotten he knew. It might come back to him though, some things do eventually,” His smile was small, uncertain, as it stretched diagonally across his face.

I was still having a difficult time picking my jaw off the floor at this point.

“Oh I found out about them by the way, they didn’t tell me, I figured it out, and I covered for them the first time they almost got caught,” Cristiano casually elaborated, “And a couple of times after that; not that I’m bragging or anything.”

Yeah, you’re a saint, I’m sure.

“Wow, so you do look beyond yourself, good to know I guess,” I was astonished.

Cristiano smirked, “Don’t you have another car to hijack and destroy?”

“Okay, you know what, just so you know, you are more stuck on that incident than the actual owner of that car,” I snapped, “So every time you think of a witty comment just please keep that in mind before you speak.”

“That’s a lie, you don’t just get over something like that,” Cristiano persisted.

“Yeah, you know what, you do, when you are Lionel Messi, you move on with your life, because you have enough going on in your life to not feel the need to dawdle on a car. Was it a great car? Yes. Is it impossible to replicate that car? No, it is not at all.”

“Whatever helps ease the guilt,” He smiled.

I took a deep breath, “Alright, I’m not going to argue with you today, I need details so I can help Mina, and I don’t have much time until she comes back.”

“Help with what?” He asked; a grin spreading over his entire countenance as he realized he had something to hang over my head that I needed.

“Getting Mina to get over him,” I spoke through slightly clenched teeth.

Yes, I had agreed to going to the Copa America with Mina. I had even brought up the idea via text with Leo, who was actually excited by the prospect, so there were no issues there. I wasn’t going to try to convince Mina to not go, but I was really hoping that by June she would be turned off to the idea of seeing Gonzalo again, and she would rather move on and away from him and footballers in general. For that, apparently I needed Cristiano’s help.

“She needs to go to Italy, or he needs to come back to Spain, or they need to meet in the middle somewhere. They need to talk things out before she decides anything, and she does not need to do anything simply on your or anyone else’s say so,” Cristiano answered as if that was the end of the conversation.

“Why are you doing this to her?” I practically yelled, throwing my hands in the air in aggravation, “What she needs to do is not deprive herself of a sport she loves, lose the breakup weight, and move along to something new. You don’t think Gonzalo’s moved on?”

“You don’t know the situation,” He returned, unmoved by my hysterics.

I have no idea how I resisted the urge to punch him.

“You didn’t know my situation and you had absolutely no problem with calling me a ‘girl with expensive taste’, and I’m pretty sure that translates to gold digger in that overly gelled head of yours,” I smirked, “So why is this situation any different? Why can’t this situation be read and judged at face value?”

“They belong together, and if you ask me for a list of reasons, you probably won’t agree with half the things I say, but that doesn’t make what I say a lie. A girl with expensive taste is a girl with expensive taste, sometimes there’s really nothing to read between the lines,” He defended with a pensive stare.

Before I could reply he had a finger pointed towards me with a stupid, sloppy grin slowly taking over his features as he wagged his finger in my face, “Also, I totally knew you had dated a footballer.”
I couldn’t tell if he was trying to change the subject, or he genuinely had that short of an attention span.

“What are you talking about?” I demanded.

“Why else would you be so against your cousin reuniting with her football playing ex if not for that fact that you got screwed over by one yourself?”

“I’m not here to talk about me,” I repeated.

“You know I’m going to find out who your ex-boyfriend is, right?”

“No you’re not,” I shook my head, crossing my arms over my chest.

“Yes, yes I am.”

“If my own family didn’t find out at the time, you are not going to find out now that everything’s done and dusted,” I assured confidently.

“You have no idea what I can do,” Cristiano assured.

He nodded towards me, looking as smug as ever, “You know what, convince me, if you can actually convince me that it’s a bad idea, then I’ll answer any question that you have about Gonzalo, about Mina, even about me.”

“You just want me to chase after you like everyone else.”

“Yes.”

I had to give him his props, “You’re really not one for beating around the bush, are you?”

“Why waste time?” He countered easily.

“You have all the time in the world to convince me,” He assured just before he left.

Well, technically, I only had until June, that is, if I was going to take him on this odd little deal of his.

“Fine,” I called after him with an irritated huff.

I could have sworn I heard his laughter echoing back towards me.

If someone had told me, even as recently as one week ago, that I would be on actual speaking terms with Cristiano and freezing out Cesc, I would have answered that they probably shouldn’t be hitting the bottle so hard.