Bad Luck Hannah

I.
Was
So
Nervous.
Josh wanted to actually hang out at my house for the day? This was going to be an absolute cataclysm when he met my parents and actually had to talk to them and Jason was going to be there and, and ---.
Could I back out of this still?
I mean, I could always tell him I got sick and had to go home, we could reschedule or something.
God, no, I couldn't chicken out this late.
I was already out here.
The bell had already rung, and I was waiting by the back door for Josh to get finished with talking to his teacher. The longer he waited, the quicker Jason might get home and piss off my parents where they wouldn't want Josh to be there.
So there was that added possible catastrophe.
I was staring very openly at Josh too, if that didn't make him want to hurry up. I'd never known him to talk to a teacher voluntarily, or at least he didn't seem the type too anyway, so I wasn't sure what he was doing.
But he was taking forever.
Josh finally nodded at whatever his teacher was saying before he headed in my direction, giving me a bright smile as he took my hand and immediately pulled me out the door.
"Is... Is everything okay?" I asked after a second, his grip almost too tight in my hand. He was making me walk too fast, I had short legs and this really wasn't working out for me.
I tugged, amd Josh slowed after a second.
"Fine."
We we already in the parking lot, and I could see his car, Chris parked right beside him. He wasn't here yet, though I could see Devin and his girlfriend walking toward us, his arm around her shoulder as she giggled over something.
They were cute.
"Hannah?"
"Hmm?" I glanced up at Josh as we stopped in front of his car. He was frowning, but I wasn't sure what exactly was wrong. He'd been fine earlier, right? Did he suddenly not want to come over?
I bit my lip as he turned to face me.
Was this going to end badly?
His eyes flicked down as he started to speak, and then he sort of sighed, his hand rising to cup my face. I felt his thumb brush my lips, and my eyes flicked up to his warily.
What was up with him?
He was being weird.
"Josh?" he was making me nervous now, and I didn't like the feeling. I could feel myself tensing, and he must have felt it too. "Is something wrong?"
His eyes raised to mine, and he shrugged, tapping my nose.
I wrinkled it instantly.
I hated it when people did that, it made me feel like I was five.
"Why are you so adorable?" he suddenly muttered, and my face flushed almost immediately.
Well...
He chuckled slightly before leaning down, his fingers lingering on my chin as he kissed me, drawing it out much more then he needed too.
I mean, he was literally kissing me in public, in front of everyone --- like the entire school was leaving right now.
I hesitated when he pulled away, tightening my hold on my books.
What was up with him?
"God, can't you guys get a room?" I heard someone complain.
I glanced over, seeing his smirky friend with the extremely long hair trotting toward us with Chris in tow, who was scowling, his eyebrows a little smeared today; why wasn't he on point?
Why was everything so weird all of a sudden?
"Go fuck yourself, Ryan," Josh sighed, shaking his head.
"Apparently I'm gonna have too," Ryan sighed, shaking his head. "All of you dickheads are getting fuck buddies and me and Chris are left out in the cold." he glanced up at Chris. "Guess we're just gonna have to hook up, huh?"
"In your dreams," Chris snorted, his car keys jingling as he started to unlock his car, refusing to look over where Josh and I stood. Actually, he hadn't looked at me at all.
Was he mad at me for something?
I frowned at him, and then looked up at Josh, seeing he was glaring at the two of them.
"Can we go now?" I mumbled, letting my gaze drop down to his chest. Why would Chris be mad at me? Or was he mad at Josh?
What had Josh done now?
"Sure, let's go."
I glanced over at Chris as I stepped to the passenger side of the car, but he was looking over at Ryan as he climbed in, grouch ing at him from the sound of it. Devin and Kylie climbed in the back, still laughing over something.
"Your parents gonna be home?"
Er.
"Yeah. But they're usually in the den," I mumbled, pulling my seatbelt on. "They'll say hi then leave... Probably."
Honestly I wasn't sure.
I'd never brought anyone over before...
But that's what they did with Jason, so I didn't see why I would be any different.
"Cool."
"Are.... Are you sure you want to hang out at, at my house?" I stared at him as he started to pull out of the school lot. "I mean, my parents ---."
"Do you not want me to be around your parents?" Josh glanced at me, raising his brows. "Is that where this is going?"
"What? No, I ---." He didn't need to change this around on me!
"Hannah, if you don't want me coming over, that's all you gotta say," he muttered, his brows furrow ing. "I can just drop you off and go home."
"That's not ---."
"It's not that big of a deal. Whatever."
I glared at him.
Now he was just being stupid.
"What is your deal today?" I snapped, the words coming out of my mouth before I even had a chance to stop them. "Why are you acting this way? No, I don't want you around my parents if you're just going to act like a jerk!"
I didn't even want to be around him if he was going to act this way --- cutting me off before I could finish speaking like it didn't even matter what I was trying to say. Jason did that enough, Josh didn't need to remind me how unimportant my thoughts were.
His hands tightened around the steering wheel as he turned into my driveway, his face aggravated. He wasn't saying anything, which I took to mean that he didn't want to spend time with me at all, that he'd decided it wasn't worth all the drama and, and ---.
Fine.
I knew it was stupid to believe he'd actually want to spend time with me.
I waited until the car stopped before I threw off my seatbelt, feeling my eyes get unnecessarily damp as I fumbled all my books together into my arms.
"Hannah, wait, don't --- I didn't mean to be a jerk," he burst, hastily scrambling out of the car after me as I started to stomp my way to the front porch. My parents cars were parked in front of the rose bushes, and Josh was parked just right behind them; Jason wasn't here yet.
Which meant I didn't need Josh at all.
He could leave me alone.
"Just go home, Josh," I snapped over my shoulder. "Since you don't want to be here!"
"I DO want to be here," he huffed, catching up with me about the time I made it to the porch. He stepped in front of me, stopping me before I could step up, and I glared up at him, refusing to acknowledge I was about to cry.
"I'm sorry, Han, don't be mad at me," his hands gently closed over my upper arms, squeezing. "I'm sorry I'm an asshole. I didn't mean to be, well --- fuck, I'm sorry." he just kind of sighed. "I had a bad day."
That didn't mean he needed to take it out on me.
I just glared at him.
He frowned down at me, and then raised a hand, brushing beneath my eyes where they were wet, his entire demeanor changing.
"I'm sorry," he mumbled gruffly, looking sincere this time. "I didn't mean to hurt your feelings."
He didn't hurt my feelings.
He was just stupid.
I looked down, pursing my lips against the need to forgive him. He couldn't be a dick to me and then expect it to just be okay.
I didn't want everyone to think it was okay to just be mean to me, that I would just keep pretending that it didn't matter whatsoever.
Because it did matter.
It really, really mattered.
"Hannah, please, don't be upset!" Josh hesitated, and his fingers brushed under my chin, forcing my face up where I had to look at him. "Do you wanna punch me or something? Because you can! Look, you see this spot?" he took a step back from me and patted his cheek. "You can hit me right here if you want!"
I rolled my eyes.
I had never hit anyone before in my life, I would probably miss and hurt myself.
I'd rather just kick him.
"Hannah ---."
"Shut up and come on," I muttered, stepping around him.
He might be a stupid moron, but he did mean well, I guess.
I heard him give a sigh of relief as he followed me onto the porch, and I nudged the front door open, seeing my mom was in the kitchen.
Sweet god.
Here goes.
I felt Josh slip his fingers through mine, giving them a comforting squeeze as he followed me inside the house.
"Mom," I started, hesitating as I stepped into the kitchen, "um, is it okay if ---?"
"Josh!" Mom gasped, a gleeful look overcoming her face. She had just turned around from the sink when I had started talking, and literally her entire tired face brightened. It wasn't like she hadn't seen him this morning or anything.
This was almost depressing.
Even Josh was a little startled.
"Er, hi, Mrs. Martin. Is it okay if I'm over for a little while?" he asked, giving her his best version of a hesitant smile as I sat my books on the table, grimacing; I knew I was kind if pathetic for not having any friends over, but her reaction just kind of rubbed that in majorly.
"Of course, honey! Are you going to stay for dinner?" she asked, turning to look at us where we stood at the table, my hands resting tense ly on my school books. "It's at six. I was going to make lasagna."
"Lasagna sounds great, actually," Josh actually perked up. "I haven't had lasagna in years."
"Does your mom not cook?"
I actually winced.
Okay, this was about to get awful. I hadn't mentioned anything to my parents about Josh's mom passing away a couple years ago; okay, so I never mentioned anything to my parents about, well, anything, but now I kind of really wish I had to avoid this awkward situation ---.
"My mom passed away a few years ago," Josh said, shrugging. "It's just me and my dad."
"Oh my goodness, I'm so sorry!" my mom looked suddenly horrified at herself, she even raised her hands to her face. "I didn't know!"
Josh started to shrug again, but my mom had stepped forward, and she was abruptly hugging him, and I saw his surprised expression before his face disappeared into a cloud of red, untamed curls.
"You poor child!" she clucked as she rocked him back and forth, and his hands hovered by his side, flailing slightly as he obviously didn't know what to do with them.
I bit my lip, trying not to laugh.
I'd never seen Josh actually stumped before.
When my mom finally released him, he cleared his throat, his face as red as I had ever seen it.
I hid my grin behind my hair.
This was so worth it.
I had never seen Josh embarrassed before.
It was actually kind of cute.
Stumped and embarrassed in the course of five minutes? My mom needed to teach me a few tricks on how to deal with boys.
"Well, my lasagna is pretty good if I say so myself," my mom sniffed, reaching up to tie her hair into a bun on the top of her head, her freckles showing up more as the sunlight from the windows lit on her face. "No one ever complains, at least. Now, Jason won't be home until late, so at least I know there'll be plenty."
And she continued to ramble.
I glanced at Josh, and he hastily stepped to my side, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly.
I couldn't help but grin at him, and I offered him my hand. He gave me a sheepish smile in return as he took it.
"Mom, we're going to my room. Yell if you need help, okay?" I called as I started to the hallway.
"Leave your door open!"
I flushed.
Like we were seriously going to do anything like that !
Josh chuckled as we stepped to my room, and I nudged the door open, grimacing as I flicked the light on.
It was a mess, but it wasn't like he hadn't already seen it.
I let all my stuff drop onto my bed, tossing my keys on the end table I distinctly remembered falling into the night I'd had to sneak through the window.
Josh barely gave my messy room a spare glance as he flopped down into the floor in front of my bed, stretching his long legs out.
"So, what do you do for fun when you're home?" he asked, kicking off his shoes and really just making himself comfortable.
I wish it was that easy for me.
"Watch movies and listen to music."
"So you're a party animal, I knew it," he grinned up at me from the floor as he tugged me down beside him, pulling my legs into his lap like this was something casual for us.
I leaned back on my palms. "Completely."
He chuckled, and he actually began tugging on my shoe strings, taking my shoes off for me. He didn't seem surprised that my socks didn't match and both were seven different colors. "So your mom really likes me, huh?"
God.
I rolled my eyes.
That's what he wanted to talk about?
"She's just not used to someone being over," I muttered, glancing at my half-open door. I hadn't necessarily closed it, but I hadn't left it wide open, either. And I was kinda nervous about being alone with Josh in a room with a bed in it.
I mean, he had never once even pushed in that direction for us to even go that far, I wasn't sure why it made me so nervous.
I brushed my hair behind my ear, keeping my eyes trained on his t shirt. He wore a lot of band shirts, I'd noticed, or a lot of raunchy shirts I wasn't quite sure how he got away with.
"I really did leave a mark, huh?"
"What?" I looked at him blankly; leave a mark?
He raised his brows at me before leaning forward, his fingers tracing the hickey on my neck, and I could feel the red creep up my face.
When he'd first kissed my neck, it had sent a straight line of electricity right between my thighs. I wasn't, I mean.... I definitely had no idea how to handle situations like that even remotely.
I'd never had that happen to me before.
I saw his lips twitch as he noticed my face growing hot, and he leaned closer. I sucked in a breath as his lips pressed against my jaw, his hand curling around the side of my neck to hold me still as he left soft kisses down my throat.
"Don't you dare leave another hickey," I mumbled, unconsciously leaning my head to the side so he could have more access.
I felt him smile.
"I won't leave another visible one," he murmured, his breath warm in my ear. I couldn't stop the shiver at his tone, and I doubted my face could get any hotter then this.
He chuckled, and pressed a loud, wet kiss on my neck that made me almost squeal in horror.
"Ew!" I shoved away from him immediately, hunching my shoulders, and he laughed, pulling on me until I was actually sitting in his lap. I giggled, wrapping my arms around his neck before I fell off, and I felt his arm rest around my waist, fingers brushing my thighs.
he grinned at me, brushing my hair out of my face where it had fallen, and I leaned forward impulsively, pressing my lips to his cheek for a brief moment. He really could be fun when he wanted too.
And I think I made him blush.
Points for Hannah.
My lips twitched, and so I kissed his cheek again, moving down to his smooth jaw; I'd never seen him with scruff, or ever felt it for that matter. I'd heard a lot of girls complain about beard burn, but I didn't think I was going to have that issue.
Josh was really on top of his game on shaving.
I felt his fingers flex against his thigh as my lips slowly made their way down his neck. I wasn't sure why I was doing this, other then payback. I didn't even know how to leave a hickey, obviously I never had before.
This was... Kind of fun, though.
Exciting, though I really wasn't sure why.
"Hannah," Joshs voice was suddenly gruff, and I felt him tense under me. He swallowed, his free hand starting to clench on my knee.
"Hmm?" I cautiously let my teeth graze the spot where his neck met his shoulder, doing to him exactly what he'd done to me the other night. He halfway jerked, and his fingers were suddenly pressing tightly into my thighs.
I chuckled, letting my hand rest against his chest as I took some revenge on him, shifting my weight so I could get a better angle myself.
"For fucks sake," Josh suddenly gasped, and he jerked away from my lips, his face red all the way to his hairline.
I blinked at him.
Did I do something.... Oh.
No, I don't think I had.
Not from what I could feel against my thigh.
My cheeks tinged immediately.
Oh.
"You have no idea how good you are at that, do you?" he muttered at me, shuffling around until I was no longer sitting in his lap but on the floor again. I kept my gaze on his face, and I was trying so hard not to laugh.
It wasn't funny, I knew it wasn't, but I couldn't help it.
I pressed my hands against my face, grinning.
Now I was kind of pleased.
Josh glanced at me as he shuffled into a new sitting position, and then rolled his eyes. "Don't look at me like that. You might be new at this shit, but you're a quick learner. I'll remember that next time when you go for vengeance," he mumbled more to himself then me.
I pressed my lips together in amusement.
I really hoped I'd left a mark.
And now I really just wanted to kiss him.
I hesitated, knotting my fingers a moment before I leaned forward, deciding to just go for it. I'd already been a little brave, so I might as well just go for it, right?
I pressed my lips against his, and he sighed into my kiss, his hand rising to cup my face before his fingers tangled in my hair.
He could take over at any moment, he knew that, right?
I didn't want to be in control of this.
I hesitated, uncertainty rising in my chest before he finally decided to take over, his tongue rubbing across my lips before I parted them in relief.
This was just so much easier.
I let my arms slip around his neck as I leaned into him, aware his back was pressing against my bed and he didn't have anywhere else to go. I felt his hand slip down my back and to my waist, his lips a little more forceful now.
Now I kind of wished we were at his house where I knew we wouldn't be bothered.
"Hannah! Josh! Dinners almost ready if you kids wanna get yourselves something to drink!"
Dammit.
I pulled away from Josh with a gasp.
Was it six already?
No freaking way.
Josh looked as disgruntled as I felt.
His hand had made it to my thighs again, which is where they always seemed to end up, and my fingers were tangled into his hair. Our lip lock had started to get a little more serious then what I'd meant it too.
He sighed.
"Mom saves the day, huh?" he murmured, his voice a little rough. He cleared his throat, his eyes flicking to my door.
Sigh.
I grumbled as I crawled to my feet, brushing hastily at my clothes, and Josh actually had to step to my mirror to fix his hair, which I had managed to fluff tremendously.
"Ready?"
I nodded, and we hastily stepped out into the kitchen.
I could see the lasagna on the stove, bread sticks lined up beside it, and Mom already had the table set complete with glasses and silverware. I raised my brows as I looked at her where she stood proudly by the stove, admiring her handywork.
She'd actually worked really hard on dinner.
"That smells great, Mrs. Martin," Josh burst, staring at the lasagna like it was the most amazing thing he'd ever seen.
"Why thank you," she practically beamed at him, drying her fingers on a dish towel. "I hope you like it!"
He grinned back at her.
"Vincent!" my mom practically bellowed, and I winced as I lifted my cup off the table and moved to the fridge, Josh hastily following my example. "Dinner!"
"You want soda or tea?" I sighed, seeing the options.
"Er, soda."
I tossed him the cold can, pulling out the sweet tea for myself and pouring a glass as my dad ambled his way into the kitchen, rubbing the back of his neck. He sat hunched over his computer all the time, so when he came out of the dark den, he always had this look like this was the first time he'd seen daylight in years.
Mom had apparently warned him about Josh, or at least he wasn't surprised to see him in our kitchen.
Maybe all of this would go smoothly.
I was praying it would anyway.
When we were all settled at the table with our plates more then generously full of lasagna and breadsticks, Dad started the inquisition.
"So, Josh," my Dad practically stared him down over the rim of his thick glasses, "how's school going?"
"Um, good, so far," Josh replied, shifting in his seat.
He hadn't even gotten to take a bite of food yet
"Do you miss your old school? Red must have ---."
"Vincent, why don't you let him eat before you give him the third degree?" Mom rolled her eyes. "He didn't come over to become an article."
Dad frowned.
Josh hesitated, his fork hovering over the lasagna.
I doubt my mom had poisoned it, and I watched him curiously as he slowly got himself a bite, almost grimacing before he tasted it.
Did he not like lasagna?
He blinked, and his entire body seemed to relax.
Did he think it was going to be horrible?
"Do you like it?" Mom asked, apparently watching him too, and I could see the nervousness on her face.
"It tastes just like my mom's did," he said after a moment, looking down. "I didn't think anyone could make it like her."
I thought my mom was going to explode into confetti where she sat, torn between lunging across the table to cradle Josh in her arms and making herself an award.
So that was why he'd been so hesitant?
Now I wanted to hug him.
"Who was your mother?" Dad asked after a second, looking hesitant for the first time all night. "Did she go to Red?"
"Oh, no. She was a Greneth student. Becca Harris."
"Becca?" Mom gasped, her eyes widening. "Harris? She was the prom queen!"
She was?
"We went to school with her," Dad added, breaking his breadsticks up into pieces. "She became a teacher didn't she?"
"Yeah, for a little while," Josh stared at my parents curiously. "We're you friends with her?"
"I dated her brother in high school," Mom chuckled, Dad frowning at her. "We became friends through her. Lyle was a sweetheart."
Dad cleared his throat.
"You're a sweetheart too, honey," she told him hastily, flushing.
"You dated Uncle Lionel?" Josh looked like he was going to choke on his fork. "And you liked him?"
"Of course! He was so sweet compared to the other boys his age! Kind of nerdy," she shrugged. "But very intelligent. What does he do now?"
"He's an architect."
"I bet he makes big money," Mom sighed.
Dad rolled his eyes.
"What about your father? I lost track of Becca after high school. I moved away for college."
"He owns a construction company on the other side of town," Josh looked down at his plate. "He's remarried now."
"What's his name?"
"Anthony."
"I remember him too. I never thought they'd actually get married. They must have really loved each other," Mom smiled at him.
Josh merely shrugged.
I didn't know his dad was remarried.
But it wasn't something he really wanted to talk about, that much was apparent, and my parents both let the conversation drop into less serious stuff.
I was really relieved when dinner was over, and then really disappointed when Josh announced he had to leave.
It was only eight.
He could technically stay a little later...
But I think the conversation about his parents had changed his mood, and I sighed internally as I stepped out onto the porch with him. I didn't want him to leave, I kind of wanted to go back into my room and makeout again for a couple hours.
Or something.
"So... Are you... Convinced to never Come back now?" I asked lightly as I stepped to the edge of the porch. Josh stepped down onto the gravel before he turned to face me. We were almost the same height like this.
"Are you kidding?" he snorted. "Any time your mom makes lasagna I'm going to be over here."
I smiled, looking down.
She really was a good cook.
"So I'll pick you up tomorrow morning?"
"Yeah."
"Cool. And maybe we can do something Friday, yknow? Hang out. Go do something, I dunno." he shrugged. "And it not end in you hating me."
"I don't hate you right now."
"That's because I haven't left yet. There's still time."
I rolled my eyes.
True.
Josh grinned, and then he leaned forward, kissing me lightly. I felt his hands slip to my waist before he pulled me into a hug, and I blinked.
He was hugging me?
"I hope you know I'm not gonna let you get away with earlier," he suddenly whispered in my ear, and I blushed; I hadn't done that with the intention of, well, making him feel THAT way.
"I didn't do it on purpose," I mumbled, pressing my cold nose against his neck and making him shiver.
He chuckled.
"Remember that Friday."