Bad Luck Hannah
A Party?
Josh POV
"So, Chris and Kylie were at a party with all the guys, they got... High... And made out?" Hannah's brow furrowed as I explained to her what had happened.
"Yep. That's what Ricky texted me. And when Devin finally blurted it out to me n Rick, apparently Ryan overheard it. So then Chris heard all of them talking about it and then someone texted Kylie and she came over and it was world war three," I chuckled, wishing one of them would have taped it for me. "End result was that Chris punched Devin, causing Kylie to flip out on him and go try to take care of Dev. So basically they're still together," I finished, shaking my head. "It's a big mess."
"Sounds like it," she yawned, stretching her arm out across my chest sleepily. At some point I'd managed to get her to agree to me sleeping over, so now the both of us were laying in her bed, surrounded by snack bowls and soda watching Godzilla again.
She was curled up to my side, her head on my shoulder, eyes already closed.
But it was three in the morning so I wasn't surprised she was wanting to conk out.
I pressed my lips into her hair, then reached over, shuffling all the junk we'd accumulated over into the floor, setting her laptop on the night stand and turning the movie off.
Hannah mumbled something at me as I shuffled down beside her, tugging my t shirt off in the process.
I was sleeping over, but I didn't want to just sleep completely in my clothes; it had taken a great deal of weasel ing on my part to even get her to agree for me too, and despite the fact we weren't fucking, I figured it was a step in t he right direction.
I'd never slept in a bed with a girl I hadn't slept with before, though. I usually slept with them, cuddled a little afterwards, and then one of us left in the morning
But obviously that wasn't an option with Hannah.
Her eyes flicked open slightly as I pulled her against my chest, but I think she was so tired it didn't even register in her mind that I had lost my t shirt.
And she was such a major Cuddler.
She liked being curled up by me, kind of like a cat in my opinion and honestly about as friendly in the beginning
I let my fingers thread through her hair as I laid there, inhaling that vanilla scent she always seemed to wear. That hadn't been a time I'd been around her that I didn't smell it on her, though fruit punch was what she always tasted like when I kissed her.
Two of my favorite flavors.
Which made her even more perfect, I guess.
Jesus, I was getting in over my head with this bet, wasn't I? I did like Hannah, she was really sweet and meant well, and I was pretty sure there wasn't a conniving bone in her entire body.
She wasn't like any of the girls I'd ever messed with.
Which made me feel shitty.
I was basically her first kiss, her first fuck (eventually), and the only reason I'd put forth so much effort was because of a bet. A bet that was over pizza for that matter, not even anything important.
I wasn't sure if I ever would have even messed with her if it hadn't been for that.
Which made this even more fucked up because she was really cool.
I sighed, tugging the blanket higher over her shoulders, seeing she was completely out.
And my arm was going numb.
The curse of being the guy, I suppose.
Hannah POV
I couldn't believe I'd actually let Josh sleep over.
What the fuck was wrong with me? I'd never had anyone sleep over before, amd how he'd managed to weasel it into being okay, I still wasn't sure.
I glanced at him where he still slept, despite the fact it was getting close to eleven.
And I couldn't get up without waking him, so it only made the situation worse. At some point I'd rolled over to face the wall, and his arm was literally locked around my waist, I couldn't make it budge easily. I could feel his breathe on the back of my neck, and he was really sleeping soundly.
I Hated To Wake Him Up.
But if I didn't go pee, I was going to explode.
Well....
Had to do something.
I sighed, and then slowly say up, pushing all of my hair behind my ear as it fell into my face. I shuffled, managing to crawl to the end of the bed before he mumbled, rolling around onto his back and throwing his arm over his face.
At least he was a heavy sleeper.
I hastily scooted to the end of the bed and off, hurrying to the bathroom.
I had never had to pee so bad in my life.
Of course drinking soda at three AM hadn't helped, either.
I glanced back in my room as I headed for the kitchen, seeing Josh was still sound asleep, his arm thrown out over my side of the sheets like he was reaching for me.
Which was kind of sweet, I suppose.
I paused in the doorway, biting my lip.
Last night had been a little... Much. I hadn't meant for it to go like that, not really. I mean, I wanted to do things with Josh like that, I just... Well, I wasn't ready for that. We weren't technically dating, anyway, and I barely had known him over a month.
I shouldn't be fooling around with him at all.
But it was nice, being touched and it not hurting.
I'd gotten so used to Jason that I'd almost forgotten that it didn't have to be that way. And Josh was so careful with me, like he thought I would break or something if he did too much.
It was nice too.
And probably why I liked him.
And I didn't want to take things too far, but I kind of liked knowing I could do the things to him that he did to me. That I could even, well, make him want me.
And the fact I was blushing over it made me feel so pathetic.
I was sixteen and had never been kissed until him, never fooled around --- nothing like that. I'd never been to a party, never had anything to drink or smoke or anything like that, and I felt like I was missing out on so much by being the way I was.
But I didn't know how else to be.
And if I could avoid awful situations where I felt awkward and uncomfortable, I was going to do it.
Which meant missing out on the things that the movies showed.
Which honestly I didn't think real life was like that at all. I heard of some parties at school, but never wild bashes like some of the movies or shows I watched had portrayed.
I don't think it really happened like that.
But, what did I know, I'd never been to one.
I'd never been invited.
And now I was bumming myself out.
I glanced over at the clock in the kitchen, seeing it was just ten AM.
And I kind of wanted breakfast.
I pursed my.lips, wondering if Josh like pancakes or not. I knew how to make them from scratch, and I actually liked cooking here and there.
But did he like them?
Only one way to find out.
I carefully walked over to the bed, stepping over the soda cans and popcorn bowls and the rest of the snacks that littered the floor. My computer sat on the night stand, and I quickly lifted it up and sat it on my desk before it got knocked off.
Not that I'd done that before.
I glanced at Josh, and sighed.
Should I really wake him up?
Should I let him sleep?
I felt awkward.
"You can stop staring at me, I'm awake."
I flushed immediately.
Oh god.
Now it really was awkward.
Josh chuckled, lifting his arm off his face, his blue eyes sleepy. He gave me a slight smile, then ran his hands down his face. "What time is it?"
"Um, about ten."
"Ugh," he grimaced, and hefted himself up onto his elbows. My eyes flicked down his chest, seeing he had a tattoo scrawled across his left side, though it still looked like a work in progress. I knew he had Antihero across his knuckles, and I'd wondered how my parents hadnt questioned him on that yet.
I pursed my lips as I stepped over to him, sitting gingerly on the edge of the bed. I'd brushed my teeth and fixed my clothes, so I knew at least I didn't look horrible.
I hoped.
Josh raised his brows at me, then shifted, sitting up entirely. "What?"
"Do you... Like pancakes?"
"Pancakes? Yeah, who doesn't like pancakes?"
Good.
I just smiled at him.
Maybe now I could not mess them up and impress him with my awesome pancake skills.
"Are they okay?"
"Are you kiddig? These are fucking great!" Josh gasped, and I blinked,
"They are?"
"These have to be the best pancakes I've ever tasted!"
I blinked again.
"Really?"
he bobbed his head, shoving what remained of his pancakes in the syrup before eating them all, and I looked at him in amusement.
"You act like you've never had pancakes before."
"Not like this. They've always been frozen," he replied, leaning back in his chair. "Like these are the best thing I've ever tasted."
Right.
I shook my head, stepping forward to take his plate to the sink, but his fingers wrapped around my waist, pulling me forward.
I wobbled before landing in his lap, and he grinned, wrapping his arms around me.
"I could get used to you making me breakfast."
"I Wouldnt," I snorted, Letting My Head Rest On His Shoulder. "I don't cook very often."
"Well you should. My mom used to cook like this all the time; I haven't eaten anything that wasn't frozen since then."
"You can come over for dinner more often if you like," I said lightly, playing with the ends of his hair where they fell just a little onto his chest; he still wasn't wearing a shirt, just his jeans, and I felt kind of awkward sitting like this.
But I didn't mind so much, he was warm.
And I stayed cold all the time.
"If your brother wouldn't drown me in the sink," he chuckled, and I wrinkled my nose at the thought.
"Jasons never around for dinner. He and Mom don't get along," I mumbled, pressing my nose against his neck.
"Why not?"
"Because he doesn't get along with anyone," I sighed. "He hates all of us."
"I don't get why." Josh frowned, his fingers running slow trails up and down my back. "Your parents are cool. And your mom cooks."
I hesitated, biting my lip.
"Jasons... I mean, my mom isn't his mom," I shrugged, deciding just to go ahead and tell him; it would come up eventually, Jason threw it in my parents faces constantly when he didn't get his way. Why risk Josh being here and being surprised when he inevitably heard it?
"My dad left his mom when he met mine, and they got married. Jason of course went with our dad in the divorce. His mom lives in the next town over, she's remarried and got a new family."
"Oh." Josh was still frowning. "But that's not your fault. He shouldn't he an asshole to you because of your parents choices."
I just shrugged.
Jason had his own issues to deal with, and I knew he had a lot of personal demons to fight. He didn't seen his real mom often, rarely his other brother or sisters, and I yhink he felt unwanted or something.
But that wasn't my business to tell.
"It is what it is."
"But it shouldn't be," he sighed, his fingers nudging my chin up where he could look at me. I averted my gaze, looking at the gages in his ears instead, biting my lip nervously.
I hated looking in people's eyes.
I wasn't sure why, but it made me nervous and I just couldn't do it.
"Hannah."
"Hmm?"
"Are you ever going to look at me? I know I'm not the best looking thing out there, but ---."
He must have noticed that I rolled my eyes.
His fingers flexed on my chin, and then he sighed, shaking his head. I felt his thumb brush my cheek before his fingers tangled in my hair, tugging my head back where I had no choice but to look up at him.
His blue eyes were a darker shade then mine, and they seemed even more so under his dark lashes, which were long for a guy anyway.
"There's nothing wrong with looking at me, you know," he murmured, refusing to let me break our gaze, and I squirmed uncomfortably.
I really didn't like it.
He sighed again, and then leaned forward, kissing me. I hesitated, but parted my lips obediently, my hand rising to his cheek.
He tasted like butter and syrup, all sweet and warm. I pressed a little closer, feeling his fingers flex in my hair, his hand lingering at my hip.
I pulled away before this went too far again.
I didn't want it too.
I felt like it would ruin... Whatever this was.
"I better clean up," I mumbled, hastily getting to my feet, ignoring his disappointed look as I gathered the dishes off the table and hastily moved them to the sink, turning on the water and pouring in probably more soap then necessary.
He appeared at my side after a second, holding a dish towel.
What was he doing?
I blinked at him kind of stupidly.
Was he going to dry the dishes?
"Why are you looking at me like I've grown another nose or something?" he asked after a second, and I flushed, quickly looking back down at the sink.
I was just surprised he was going to help. Jason never did anything around here, and even my dad mysteriously disappeared when it came to cleaning up the dishes. Usually it was just left to me and my mother.
"No... Reason."
Joshs lips twitched, but he didn't say anything else, just started drying the dishes as I dropped them into the clean water, which made everything go so much quicker. It didn't take but a second for everything to be washed up.
"Now we have the entire day to spend together," Josh said brightly as he sat the last dish in the cabinet, and then his eyes flicked to my face. "I mean, if you want too."
"What would we do? Watching movies puts both of us to sleep," I said, drying my hands.
"I can think of a few things to keep us awake."
I could feel the red tinge my cheeks.
Did he have to say things like that?
I glanced at him, but he was looking down at his phone, absently answering a few texts from Ricky I was guessing.
I couldn't believe Chris had actually kissed Kylie, he didn't seem like that kind of guy. But Josh had said they were high, so.... Did that even excuse it? And he'd punched Devin? I did hope that he was okay.
"How's Devin?" I asked after a moment, nudging the chairs under the table quickly.
"Rick says he's fine. Kylie stayed over last night, and he says they've reconnected perfectly. Probably loudly too, knowing them."
"Reconnected?" I looked at him blankly.
He raised his brows, and just kind of looked at me a second before answering. "Yes. Reconnected. As in ---."
"I get it, don't tell me," I burst, my face flaming. God, how had I missed that on the beginning? Now this was embarrassing!
I looked away from him quickly, feeling kind of stupid. Why had I said that? I should have known exactly what he meant. Or I shouldn't have said anything and embarrassed myself.
THIS was the reason I didn't talk much.
I gazed down at my fingers, nervously twisting them in my shirt. It was only eleven now, so I wasn't quite sure what we were supposed to do for an entire day.
I knew without a doubt my parents and Jason wouldn't be back until Sunday. Mom had finally pitched enough of a fit on Dad to convince him to take Jason to anger management after he'd punched her car, which had apparently been the last straw in her book. That's where they were now, forcing him to be evaluated for one of the classes a few towns over.
I hoped they left him there, honestly.
He could manage all of it by himself.
I shifted my shoulders, feeling the bruises on the back of them remind me where they were. It had left quite a mark when he'd knocked me into the lockers the other day, but as long as I didn't think about them, they didn't bother me. But I also didn't want Josh to know about them either, not when he was so temperamental.
So I'd been careful to try to hide that beneath my big shirt.
"Hey, so, you wanna head over to my house for a few hours?" Joshs voice interrupted my thoughts, and I glanced over at him, biting my lip.
"I thought you said it was a battle zone."
"There's a truce right now," he shrugged, stepping over to me and nuzzling his nose against mine. "Plus I wanna get some different clothes. Unless you really like seeing me in Metallica," he chuckled, wrapping his arms around my waist.
I blushed, but shrugged.
"Sure. Just lemme get dressed."
Josh POV
"So you're telling me you spent the entire night at her house and you didn't sleep together?" Ricky hissed in my ear as he followed me up the stairs. I'd left Hannah downstairs with Devin and Kylie in the den, despite her face telling me she'd rather had gone with me even though I was changing.
"Yeah."
"Dude, why the hell are you taking so long with her?"
I sent him an irritated look over my shoulder as I made it upstairs, heading straight for my room.
"Hannah's a virgin, dude. I'm the first guy she ever even kissed. It's not simple."
Ricky looked huffy. "Well, she needs to stop being so shy."
What was his problem?
I hesitated at my door, frowning as I looked back at him. "What does it even matter to you, Rick? You're not even in on this."
He pursed his lips.
Seriously?
"Dude, what the hell? How did you involve yourself?" I turned to glare at him as I opened my door, stepping inside and trotting to my closet and getting some new clothes. I stepped to my bathroom, shutting the door.
"Well, me and Devin might have added to your bet," his muffled voice replied as I turned the shower on, intent of washing off super fast.
"How so?"
"Devin doesn't think you can do it at all," he continued, a little louder to he heard over the shower. "I think you can. So you fucking better because I'm a lose ten bucks otherwise."
I rolled my eyes.
"I'm gonna win, man. She's really warming up to me." I told him, running a towel through my damp hair as I stepped out. "Slowly, but she is. It helps when her brother isn't around a lot."
"I don't doubt it. He's such a shithead," Ricky scoffed. He and Chris were closer then they were to us, Chris had stayed at his house a lot when it got too bad at his own. So when it came to abuse, he had almost the same attitude as Chris.
I didn't blame them.
I made an agreeing sound as I brushed my teeth quickly, aware I'd probably been gone ten minutes and Hannah was probably under the couch. Devin had one hell of a black eye, and Kylie was cooing after him like he'd broken half of his bones instead. You could tell she felt guilty, and I know Chris did because he hadn't come out of his room the entire time I'd been back.
But I'd rather have had Hannah with those two then Chris, in case his make a move syndrome was still up and running. I'd laid dibs on Hannah and I didn't want the tall fucker to mess it up for me; I'd almost been worried that she'd started to like him instead.
And honestly, I think if it hadn't been for the fact of me finding her in the library, it probably would have headed in that direction.
Which was unnerving.
That meant if I fucked up too bad, she might go running to him.
Not that Hannah technically ran, at all; in fact I'd never seen her run. Well, except in the beginning when I'd tried to kiss her. She had run away from me.
I chuckled.
Now she didn't run.
"Man, are you done yet?"
"Why the hell are you waiting for me to get out of the shower anyway?" I demanded, flinging the bathroom door open as I pulled on my plain red t shirt. "Do you want me that bad for yourself?"
"You know I do," Ricky rolled his eyes where he sat in my floor in front of my TV. I had my own Xbox hooked into it, but I'd figured if I'd brought Hannah up here in the beginning she'd probably freak out. Now probably not so much since I'd been in her room and slept over.
"Is there anything else I should know before I head downstairs?" I asked dryly, glancing at him. He shook his head.
"Nah. But I am thinking about throwing a party next Friday," he perked up. "First one of the year. Invite everyone."
"A party?" I frowned, looking at him. He wanted to have one here? At my house? The house we were supposed to be taking care of no matter what like it was our own little baby?
"Yep. Invite Tommy over," Ricky gave me a hopeful grin. "He can bring the good stuff. You know how he likes to supply the parties."
He knew he would win me over with Tommy.
I sighed, then shrugged. "Fine with me. As long as my uncle doesn't decide to suddenly come home early, we should be good. But I'm not buying any shit for it and if something breaks you're fucking paying for it."
And how the hell was I gonna convince Hannah to come to a party with me?
"So, Chris and Kylie were at a party with all the guys, they got... High... And made out?" Hannah's brow furrowed as I explained to her what had happened.
"Yep. That's what Ricky texted me. And when Devin finally blurted it out to me n Rick, apparently Ryan overheard it. So then Chris heard all of them talking about it and then someone texted Kylie and she came over and it was world war three," I chuckled, wishing one of them would have taped it for me. "End result was that Chris punched Devin, causing Kylie to flip out on him and go try to take care of Dev. So basically they're still together," I finished, shaking my head. "It's a big mess."
"Sounds like it," she yawned, stretching her arm out across my chest sleepily. At some point I'd managed to get her to agree to me sleeping over, so now the both of us were laying in her bed, surrounded by snack bowls and soda watching Godzilla again.
She was curled up to my side, her head on my shoulder, eyes already closed.
But it was three in the morning so I wasn't surprised she was wanting to conk out.
I pressed my lips into her hair, then reached over, shuffling all the junk we'd accumulated over into the floor, setting her laptop on the night stand and turning the movie off.
Hannah mumbled something at me as I shuffled down beside her, tugging my t shirt off in the process.
I was sleeping over, but I didn't want to just sleep completely in my clothes; it had taken a great deal of weasel ing on my part to even get her to agree for me too, and despite the fact we weren't fucking, I figured it was a step in t he right direction.
I'd never slept in a bed with a girl I hadn't slept with before, though. I usually slept with them, cuddled a little afterwards, and then one of us left in the morning
But obviously that wasn't an option with Hannah.
Her eyes flicked open slightly as I pulled her against my chest, but I think she was so tired it didn't even register in her mind that I had lost my t shirt.
And she was such a major Cuddler.
She liked being curled up by me, kind of like a cat in my opinion and honestly about as friendly in the beginning
I let my fingers thread through her hair as I laid there, inhaling that vanilla scent she always seemed to wear. That hadn't been a time I'd been around her that I didn't smell it on her, though fruit punch was what she always tasted like when I kissed her.
Two of my favorite flavors.
Which made her even more perfect, I guess.
Jesus, I was getting in over my head with this bet, wasn't I? I did like Hannah, she was really sweet and meant well, and I was pretty sure there wasn't a conniving bone in her entire body.
She wasn't like any of the girls I'd ever messed with.
Which made me feel shitty.
I was basically her first kiss, her first fuck (eventually), and the only reason I'd put forth so much effort was because of a bet. A bet that was over pizza for that matter, not even anything important.
I wasn't sure if I ever would have even messed with her if it hadn't been for that.
Which made this even more fucked up because she was really cool.
I sighed, tugging the blanket higher over her shoulders, seeing she was completely out.
And my arm was going numb.
The curse of being the guy, I suppose.
Hannah POV
I couldn't believe I'd actually let Josh sleep over.
What the fuck was wrong with me? I'd never had anyone sleep over before, amd how he'd managed to weasel it into being okay, I still wasn't sure.
I glanced at him where he still slept, despite the fact it was getting close to eleven.
And I couldn't get up without waking him, so it only made the situation worse. At some point I'd rolled over to face the wall, and his arm was literally locked around my waist, I couldn't make it budge easily. I could feel his breathe on the back of my neck, and he was really sleeping soundly.
I Hated To Wake Him Up.
But if I didn't go pee, I was going to explode.
Well....
Had to do something.
I sighed, and then slowly say up, pushing all of my hair behind my ear as it fell into my face. I shuffled, managing to crawl to the end of the bed before he mumbled, rolling around onto his back and throwing his arm over his face.
At least he was a heavy sleeper.
I hastily scooted to the end of the bed and off, hurrying to the bathroom.
I had never had to pee so bad in my life.
Of course drinking soda at three AM hadn't helped, either.
I glanced back in my room as I headed for the kitchen, seeing Josh was still sound asleep, his arm thrown out over my side of the sheets like he was reaching for me.
Which was kind of sweet, I suppose.
I paused in the doorway, biting my lip.
Last night had been a little... Much. I hadn't meant for it to go like that, not really. I mean, I wanted to do things with Josh like that, I just... Well, I wasn't ready for that. We weren't technically dating, anyway, and I barely had known him over a month.
I shouldn't be fooling around with him at all.
But it was nice, being touched and it not hurting.
I'd gotten so used to Jason that I'd almost forgotten that it didn't have to be that way. And Josh was so careful with me, like he thought I would break or something if he did too much.
It was nice too.
And probably why I liked him.
And I didn't want to take things too far, but I kind of liked knowing I could do the things to him that he did to me. That I could even, well, make him want me.
And the fact I was blushing over it made me feel so pathetic.
I was sixteen and had never been kissed until him, never fooled around --- nothing like that. I'd never been to a party, never had anything to drink or smoke or anything like that, and I felt like I was missing out on so much by being the way I was.
But I didn't know how else to be.
And if I could avoid awful situations where I felt awkward and uncomfortable, I was going to do it.
Which meant missing out on the things that the movies showed.
Which honestly I didn't think real life was like that at all. I heard of some parties at school, but never wild bashes like some of the movies or shows I watched had portrayed.
I don't think it really happened like that.
But, what did I know, I'd never been to one.
I'd never been invited.
And now I was bumming myself out.
I glanced over at the clock in the kitchen, seeing it was just ten AM.
And I kind of wanted breakfast.
I pursed my.lips, wondering if Josh like pancakes or not. I knew how to make them from scratch, and I actually liked cooking here and there.
But did he like them?
Only one way to find out.
I carefully walked over to the bed, stepping over the soda cans and popcorn bowls and the rest of the snacks that littered the floor. My computer sat on the night stand, and I quickly lifted it up and sat it on my desk before it got knocked off.
Not that I'd done that before.
I glanced at Josh, and sighed.
Should I really wake him up?
Should I let him sleep?
I felt awkward.
"You can stop staring at me, I'm awake."
I flushed immediately.
Oh god.
Now it really was awkward.
Josh chuckled, lifting his arm off his face, his blue eyes sleepy. He gave me a slight smile, then ran his hands down his face. "What time is it?"
"Um, about ten."
"Ugh," he grimaced, and hefted himself up onto his elbows. My eyes flicked down his chest, seeing he had a tattoo scrawled across his left side, though it still looked like a work in progress. I knew he had Antihero across his knuckles, and I'd wondered how my parents hadnt questioned him on that yet.
I pursed my lips as I stepped over to him, sitting gingerly on the edge of the bed. I'd brushed my teeth and fixed my clothes, so I knew at least I didn't look horrible.
I hoped.
Josh raised his brows at me, then shifted, sitting up entirely. "What?"
"Do you... Like pancakes?"
"Pancakes? Yeah, who doesn't like pancakes?"
Good.
I just smiled at him.
Maybe now I could not mess them up and impress him with my awesome pancake skills.
"Are they okay?"
"Are you kiddig? These are fucking great!" Josh gasped, and I blinked,
"They are?"
"These have to be the best pancakes I've ever tasted!"
I blinked again.
"Really?"
he bobbed his head, shoving what remained of his pancakes in the syrup before eating them all, and I looked at him in amusement.
"You act like you've never had pancakes before."
"Not like this. They've always been frozen," he replied, leaning back in his chair. "Like these are the best thing I've ever tasted."
Right.
I shook my head, stepping forward to take his plate to the sink, but his fingers wrapped around my waist, pulling me forward.
I wobbled before landing in his lap, and he grinned, wrapping his arms around me.
"I could get used to you making me breakfast."
"I Wouldnt," I snorted, Letting My Head Rest On His Shoulder. "I don't cook very often."
"Well you should. My mom used to cook like this all the time; I haven't eaten anything that wasn't frozen since then."
"You can come over for dinner more often if you like," I said lightly, playing with the ends of his hair where they fell just a little onto his chest; he still wasn't wearing a shirt, just his jeans, and I felt kind of awkward sitting like this.
But I didn't mind so much, he was warm.
And I stayed cold all the time.
"If your brother wouldn't drown me in the sink," he chuckled, and I wrinkled my nose at the thought.
"Jasons never around for dinner. He and Mom don't get along," I mumbled, pressing my nose against his neck.
"Why not?"
"Because he doesn't get along with anyone," I sighed. "He hates all of us."
"I don't get why." Josh frowned, his fingers running slow trails up and down my back. "Your parents are cool. And your mom cooks."
I hesitated, biting my lip.
"Jasons... I mean, my mom isn't his mom," I shrugged, deciding just to go ahead and tell him; it would come up eventually, Jason threw it in my parents faces constantly when he didn't get his way. Why risk Josh being here and being surprised when he inevitably heard it?
"My dad left his mom when he met mine, and they got married. Jason of course went with our dad in the divorce. His mom lives in the next town over, she's remarried and got a new family."
"Oh." Josh was still frowning. "But that's not your fault. He shouldn't he an asshole to you because of your parents choices."
I just shrugged.
Jason had his own issues to deal with, and I knew he had a lot of personal demons to fight. He didn't seen his real mom often, rarely his other brother or sisters, and I yhink he felt unwanted or something.
But that wasn't my business to tell.
"It is what it is."
"But it shouldn't be," he sighed, his fingers nudging my chin up where he could look at me. I averted my gaze, looking at the gages in his ears instead, biting my lip nervously.
I hated looking in people's eyes.
I wasn't sure why, but it made me nervous and I just couldn't do it.
"Hannah."
"Hmm?"
"Are you ever going to look at me? I know I'm not the best looking thing out there, but ---."
He must have noticed that I rolled my eyes.
His fingers flexed on my chin, and then he sighed, shaking his head. I felt his thumb brush my cheek before his fingers tangled in my hair, tugging my head back where I had no choice but to look up at him.
His blue eyes were a darker shade then mine, and they seemed even more so under his dark lashes, which were long for a guy anyway.
"There's nothing wrong with looking at me, you know," he murmured, refusing to let me break our gaze, and I squirmed uncomfortably.
I really didn't like it.
He sighed again, and then leaned forward, kissing me. I hesitated, but parted my lips obediently, my hand rising to his cheek.
He tasted like butter and syrup, all sweet and warm. I pressed a little closer, feeling his fingers flex in my hair, his hand lingering at my hip.
I pulled away before this went too far again.
I didn't want it too.
I felt like it would ruin... Whatever this was.
"I better clean up," I mumbled, hastily getting to my feet, ignoring his disappointed look as I gathered the dishes off the table and hastily moved them to the sink, turning on the water and pouring in probably more soap then necessary.
He appeared at my side after a second, holding a dish towel.
What was he doing?
I blinked at him kind of stupidly.
Was he going to dry the dishes?
"Why are you looking at me like I've grown another nose or something?" he asked after a second, and I flushed, quickly looking back down at the sink.
I was just surprised he was going to help. Jason never did anything around here, and even my dad mysteriously disappeared when it came to cleaning up the dishes. Usually it was just left to me and my mother.
"No... Reason."
Joshs lips twitched, but he didn't say anything else, just started drying the dishes as I dropped them into the clean water, which made everything go so much quicker. It didn't take but a second for everything to be washed up.
"Now we have the entire day to spend together," Josh said brightly as he sat the last dish in the cabinet, and then his eyes flicked to my face. "I mean, if you want too."
"What would we do? Watching movies puts both of us to sleep," I said, drying my hands.
"I can think of a few things to keep us awake."
I could feel the red tinge my cheeks.
Did he have to say things like that?
I glanced at him, but he was looking down at his phone, absently answering a few texts from Ricky I was guessing.
I couldn't believe Chris had actually kissed Kylie, he didn't seem like that kind of guy. But Josh had said they were high, so.... Did that even excuse it? And he'd punched Devin? I did hope that he was okay.
"How's Devin?" I asked after a moment, nudging the chairs under the table quickly.
"Rick says he's fine. Kylie stayed over last night, and he says they've reconnected perfectly. Probably loudly too, knowing them."
"Reconnected?" I looked at him blankly.
He raised his brows, and just kind of looked at me a second before answering. "Yes. Reconnected. As in ---."
"I get it, don't tell me," I burst, my face flaming. God, how had I missed that on the beginning? Now this was embarrassing!
I looked away from him quickly, feeling kind of stupid. Why had I said that? I should have known exactly what he meant. Or I shouldn't have said anything and embarrassed myself.
THIS was the reason I didn't talk much.
I gazed down at my fingers, nervously twisting them in my shirt. It was only eleven now, so I wasn't quite sure what we were supposed to do for an entire day.
I knew without a doubt my parents and Jason wouldn't be back until Sunday. Mom had finally pitched enough of a fit on Dad to convince him to take Jason to anger management after he'd punched her car, which had apparently been the last straw in her book. That's where they were now, forcing him to be evaluated for one of the classes a few towns over.
I hoped they left him there, honestly.
He could manage all of it by himself.
I shifted my shoulders, feeling the bruises on the back of them remind me where they were. It had left quite a mark when he'd knocked me into the lockers the other day, but as long as I didn't think about them, they didn't bother me. But I also didn't want Josh to know about them either, not when he was so temperamental.
So I'd been careful to try to hide that beneath my big shirt.
"Hey, so, you wanna head over to my house for a few hours?" Joshs voice interrupted my thoughts, and I glanced over at him, biting my lip.
"I thought you said it was a battle zone."
"There's a truce right now," he shrugged, stepping over to me and nuzzling his nose against mine. "Plus I wanna get some different clothes. Unless you really like seeing me in Metallica," he chuckled, wrapping his arms around my waist.
I blushed, but shrugged.
"Sure. Just lemme get dressed."
Josh POV
"So you're telling me you spent the entire night at her house and you didn't sleep together?" Ricky hissed in my ear as he followed me up the stairs. I'd left Hannah downstairs with Devin and Kylie in the den, despite her face telling me she'd rather had gone with me even though I was changing.
"Yeah."
"Dude, why the hell are you taking so long with her?"
I sent him an irritated look over my shoulder as I made it upstairs, heading straight for my room.
"Hannah's a virgin, dude. I'm the first guy she ever even kissed. It's not simple."
Ricky looked huffy. "Well, she needs to stop being so shy."
What was his problem?
I hesitated at my door, frowning as I looked back at him. "What does it even matter to you, Rick? You're not even in on this."
He pursed his lips.
Seriously?
"Dude, what the hell? How did you involve yourself?" I turned to glare at him as I opened my door, stepping inside and trotting to my closet and getting some new clothes. I stepped to my bathroom, shutting the door.
"Well, me and Devin might have added to your bet," his muffled voice replied as I turned the shower on, intent of washing off super fast.
"How so?"
"Devin doesn't think you can do it at all," he continued, a little louder to he heard over the shower. "I think you can. So you fucking better because I'm a lose ten bucks otherwise."
I rolled my eyes.
"I'm gonna win, man. She's really warming up to me." I told him, running a towel through my damp hair as I stepped out. "Slowly, but she is. It helps when her brother isn't around a lot."
"I don't doubt it. He's such a shithead," Ricky scoffed. He and Chris were closer then they were to us, Chris had stayed at his house a lot when it got too bad at his own. So when it came to abuse, he had almost the same attitude as Chris.
I didn't blame them.
I made an agreeing sound as I brushed my teeth quickly, aware I'd probably been gone ten minutes and Hannah was probably under the couch. Devin had one hell of a black eye, and Kylie was cooing after him like he'd broken half of his bones instead. You could tell she felt guilty, and I know Chris did because he hadn't come out of his room the entire time I'd been back.
But I'd rather have had Hannah with those two then Chris, in case his make a move syndrome was still up and running. I'd laid dibs on Hannah and I didn't want the tall fucker to mess it up for me; I'd almost been worried that she'd started to like him instead.
And honestly, I think if it hadn't been for the fact of me finding her in the library, it probably would have headed in that direction.
Which was unnerving.
That meant if I fucked up too bad, she might go running to him.
Not that Hannah technically ran, at all; in fact I'd never seen her run. Well, except in the beginning when I'd tried to kiss her. She had run away from me.
I chuckled.
Now she didn't run.
"Man, are you done yet?"
"Why the hell are you waiting for me to get out of the shower anyway?" I demanded, flinging the bathroom door open as I pulled on my plain red t shirt. "Do you want me that bad for yourself?"
"You know I do," Ricky rolled his eyes where he sat in my floor in front of my TV. I had my own Xbox hooked into it, but I'd figured if I'd brought Hannah up here in the beginning she'd probably freak out. Now probably not so much since I'd been in her room and slept over.
"Is there anything else I should know before I head downstairs?" I asked dryly, glancing at him. He shook his head.
"Nah. But I am thinking about throwing a party next Friday," he perked up. "First one of the year. Invite everyone."
"A party?" I frowned, looking at him. He wanted to have one here? At my house? The house we were supposed to be taking care of no matter what like it was our own little baby?
"Yep. Invite Tommy over," Ricky gave me a hopeful grin. "He can bring the good stuff. You know how he likes to supply the parties."
He knew he would win me over with Tommy.
I sighed, then shrugged. "Fine with me. As long as my uncle doesn't decide to suddenly come home early, we should be good. But I'm not buying any shit for it and if something breaks you're fucking paying for it."
And how the hell was I gonna convince Hannah to come to a party with me?