‹ Prequel: Let's Waste Time
Sequel: Around Our Heads
Status: Complete

Chasing Cars

Six

In the afternoon, I was sitting on a stool behind the counter, flipping through a comic book. It wasn’t my favorite, but the artwork was pretty. So I was just looking at it and wasting time while I waited for something to present itself. The door dinged, and Chris walked in with his baseball BFF.

Chris was a nerd. Down to his soul. It wasn’t easy to notice at first glance because he dressed like a typical jock dude in his mid-twenties. He went on runs every morning and liked sports, and loved playing baseball. But once you looked past that, he was actually a huge Star Wars nerd and took a lot of serious self-reflecting to decide which Hogwarts house he was in. He wasn’t nerdy in that smart geeky computer guy kind of way. More of a pop culture nerd. But I was the exact same way. I could barely count change back at the register, but I could remember a handful of words in Klingon.

When he first got recruited for the Giants, he was immediately taken under the wing of another player. This guy was much better at picking up on Chris’s nerdiness than I was at first. He immediately latched onto him. And where Chris’s nerdiness wasn’t immediately noticeable, Josh’s was. Everything about this guy screamed dork except that he was tall and athletic, being that he was an actual professional athlete. The only time you didn’t know Josh was a huge nerd was when he was in his baseball uniform and wore contacts.

It was safe to say they hit it off. They’d been besties ever since.

“Hey, guys,” I said.

“Brought you lunch,” Chris told me, setting a paper bag on the counter.

“Aw. You’re so sweet.” I opened the bag and took a peek inside. “Ooh.”

There was this really good cheeseburger place that had a whole vegetarian menu. I hadn’t been a vegetarian when Chris and I met, but it became easier to just eat the same thing once we moved in together. And I sort of developed the same habits. I wasn’t like super strict about it. Especially if we went out to eat. But more often than not, I just got the veggie stuff anyway. This place happened to make the absolute best veggie burgers. So even though I was perfectly fine getting a big meaty cheeseburger, I actually preferred their veggie burgers anyway.

“You’re my hero,” I told him as I pulled everything onto the counter. He smiled and leaned against the glass even though I was low-key worried it would break.

“Wanted to make sure you didn’t pass out again,” he explained.

“I’ve been fine all day, actually.”

“She’s been in a weird mood all day,” Albert said from behind the counter. He was on the floor by my feet. Sitting cross-legged as he read comics. I was sure Chris and Josh hadn’t even realized he was there. They both leaned over the counter to look at him.

“How so?”

“She came in here humming show tunes and won’t shut up. She’s been like Mother Fucking Theresa all morning. All saintly and peaceful like Pa’u Zotoh Zhaan.” Chris gave me a confused look. We hadn’t gotten that far in our nerdy TV binges yet.

“A what?” he asked.

“She’s the alien priest from Farscape,” I explained. He nodded once.

“Right. I should have known.”

“It’s okay. Albert has been a Rygel all day.” He tossed his comic aside and stood up like I’d offended him.

“I have not been a Rygel,” he stated. “I’m Crichton at best.”

“Crichton, really? You wish. You’re a Rygel, and you know it.”

“And what exactly do you mean by that?”

“I mean that you need to fucking chill, my guy.” Chris and Josh were staring at us with interest.

“It’s like my girlfriend speaks a foreign language,” Chris said. Josh nodded thoughtfully.

“The sad thing is—I actually know what they’re saying,” he replied.

“Well, frell you, man!” Albert said. Then he stalked off to the back room. I smiled and kicked my feet, reaching for a French-fry.

“Thanks for bringing me lunch,” I told Chris. His smile softened.

“Not a problem. Always worth it to hear you argue in nerd speak.”

“Go frell yourself.” He kissed my forehead.

“I have no idea what you just said, but I love you anyway.”

“You understand enough to figure it out. On second thought, don’t frell yourself. I’ll do that for you.” He kissed my lips.

“Now I definitely know what you’re saying. I’ll see you when you get home.”

“Okay, bye.”

“C’mon,” Josh said. “Let’s get the frell out of this dren hole.” I laughed.

“Drad!” We did a high five, and Chris watched us like we were nuts. He was a nerd, too, but I hadn’t introduced him yet. Josh nodded toward him.

“Fahrbot,” he said. I nodded knowingly.

“Totally.”

“Later.”

“Bye.” Chris kissed me again.

“See you when you get home,” he repeated.

“I’m gonna frell you so hard.” He laughed.

“Oh jeez.” They turned to leave.

“Frell means fuck, man,” Josh told him.

“Yeah, I kinda worked that out,” he replied. Then they disappeared out of the door.
♠ ♠ ♠
This chapter is my personal love letter to Farscape. My favorite show that ever existed. That I have watched numerous times, and also collected comic books for. I also started fan fics that never reached completion. And I would probably sell my soul to meet the cast. I still pray every day for a movie.