Unlikely Heroes

Mikaela had never been to a funeral before. She felt stiff and out of place in the black dress she had bought, surrounded by sobbing people she had never met. Dana had fairly collapsed on her when she arrived at the church, her eyes red.

"I can't believe this," Dana whispered. "It still doesn't seem real."

Brett had been declared DOA after the ambulance came to collect him after the shooting. Dana had fainted and Cal had just stood there with his face white as a sheet. She spotted him through the throng of people, talking in quiet tones to Leon. They both looked up as she approached, a sniffling Dana still clinging to her arm. Mikaela watched Cal's drawn, tired face with worry. She gently brushed her fingers against the back of his hand to get his attention since he looked a million miles away. Immediately he caught her hand in his and tugged her closer.

Mikaela knew he and Leon were trying hard to put up a tough front but she could still see the devastated look in their eyes. Everyone shuffled to their seats. There was a large turn out of mourners but not very many people were talking, outside of quietly murmuring condolences to Brett's family. Mikaela had never met them before today and now it made her heart twist painfully to see how lost and empty they seemed.

The priest approached the podium and launched into a speech about the good being taken from the earth too young and God's plan and some other stuff that Mikaela didn't really pay attention to. Her eyes were glued to the coffin where Brett was lying. His parents had opted for an open casket funeral an Mikaela really wished they hadn't. She had always heard or read that dead bodies in coffins looked peaceful; like they were sleeping and could wake up at any moment. But Brett didn't look like that at all. He looked more like a wax figure. It didn't seem like it was even him in that stupid pine box.

Brett's mother tried to speak when the priest offered to let people come up to the podium to say a few words, but the poor woman took a look at her son lying in that coffin and dissolved into almost hysterical sobs and the priest helped her back to her seat. A few other people Mikaela didn't know gave brief talks, but it was when Brett's little sister; Becka; toddled up to the podium and needed her father's assistance to reach the microphone that Mikaela felt her breath hitch painfully in her chest. She was so tiny and solemn looking in her black velvet dress. Mikaela remembered that Cal had mentioned she had just turned five.

"I'm going to miss Brett, 'cause he was the best big brother in the whole world," she began. Behind her, her father looked pale and unfocused, like he wasn't really sure he was there or that any of this was happening.

"But I know that he's in heaven now," Becka went on. "And he's an angel, so that means he's still going to be looking out for me all the time until I get to see him again. So I know he wouldn't want us to be sad."

Dana started crying quietly again and Mikaela reached out to take her hand. She held onto Dana with one hand and Cal with the other as they watched Brett's casket be lowered into the ground.

"We were all having such a great time that night," Dana whispered. "This doesn't seem possible. This wasn't supposed to happen."

"It's really fucked up," Leon muttered in agreement. Mikaela and Cal were both silent on the bus ride back to her house. Cal seemed lost in thought and Mikaela wasn't sure what to say to him anyway, which she hated. She wanted to make him feel better, offer some words of solace. But anything she could think to say sounded about as shallow as a rain puddle. Nothing would make Brett's death somehow okay or less terrible.

Mikaela tore her stuffy black dress off as she walked up the stairs. She never wanted to wear it again. She shimmied into one of Cal's shirts and flopped face first on the bed. Moxie trotted over from her own bed in the corner and jumped up to nuzzle Mikaela's head. Cal came in, shrugging out of his jacket and undoing his tie. He scowled at it slightly as he tossed it aside. He lay down beside Mikaela and stared at the ceiling. Moxie sprawled across their legs. Even she seemed to sense the sadness that practically permeated the air in the room.

The next day the principal called an assembly to talk about how tragic Brett's murder was and to let everyone know there were grief counselor available for anyone who wanted to talk to them. That evening the school hosted a candlelight vigil. Mikaela didn't really want to go but Leon and Cal went so she kept quiet and went along.

Cal and Leon reminisced about memories with Brett but Mikaela just kept staring at the little flickering votive candle in her hand. Her head raised as Kyle approached them.

"I'm really sorry about Brett," he said to Cal. "He was a cool guy. I heard you and Mikaela were there when...when it happened."

"We were on a double date," Mikaela mumbled. "Dana was with him."

She felt suddenly overwhelmed, and vaguely claustrophobic even though they were outside in the cold early December air. The double date had been her idea. They were at the ice rink because she had suggested it. Her shoulders went rigid as the thought crossed her mind and at the same time she spotted none other than Jeff and Mikey walking towards them. Kyle, Cal and Leon all started glaring at them and they held their hands up in surrender.

"We're not here to pick a fight," Jeff muttered. "We don't like you and you don't like us but it's fucked up, what happened to your friend."

"Yeah," Cal said flatly.

"We just...wanted to say truce, I guess." Jeff had his hands stuffed into his pockets and his shoulders hunched while Mikey shifted awkwardly. "Uh, sorry about Brett and your car and everything." He glanced at Mikaela for the briefest moment before guiltily turning away.

Mikaela heard a quiet voice call her name and turned to see Dana, looking impossibly lost and fragile in her thick winter coat and clutching a candle. Kyle immediately asked her how she was doing and she gave him a wan, bleary smile.

"I've been having some trouble sleeping," she admitted. "I still haven't really processed what happened. We were all having such a good time and then everything happened so suddenly."

The two of them continued to talk in hushed voices and Cal and Leon were staring suspiciously in the direction Jeff and Mikey had gone. Mikaela stayed silent, watching all of them and that sharp pang of guilt was steadily gnawing away at her insides. She jumped slightly when Cal placed a hand on her back.

"You ready to go home?" he murmured. She nodded, folding her arms tightly against herself. Cal kept an arm around her shoulders on the bus ride, but he seemed lost in thought as he stared out the window. Mikaela didn't speak until they were in her living room.

"I'm so sorry Cal," she said softly, her eyes growing damp.

"For what?" He turned to her with a worried frown.

"I introduced them. The ice rink was my idea, and now-"

"Hey, no. Don't do that." Cal yanked her into a crushing hug. "Brett really liked Dana, and it was amazing of you to introduce them. Don't think you need to feel bad about that. The fact that you cared enough to find him a date is one of the things that makes me love you."

He tensed at the same time Mikaela did. She pulled back and stared up at him with wide eyes.

"What?" she squeaked.

"Uh," Cal replied, his ears bright red. "I...I was trying to tell you at the ice rink." Cal ran his hand through his hair and Mikaela had never seen him look so nervous. He started to stammer something else but Mikaela cut him off by launching herself back into his arms with enough force to knock them both back onto the couch. Moxie barked and leaped up next to them to investigate. Mikaela fended off Moxie's eager doggy kisses and sat up breathlessly to face Cal. Her heart was pounding with terror but she forced herself to say the four little words.

"I love you, too," she whispered.