Belonging to Lust

“Where have you been tonight, Zaiyia?” Heath asked her in a deep perilous tone that would have made her step cautiously back away from him if she wasn’t deeply in love with him. He continued to sit in the love seat in his living room in the light of the decorative glowing lamp his little sister insisted on buying him for his home to match the decor. His green eyes glowed with contained anger as they stayed on their target that just snuck in in the middle of the night from god knows where, his hands fisted on the arm rest of his chair.

“I…” Zaiyia stumbled to explain herself in a soft voice, her eyes unknowingly filling with tears. She had just come back from sneaking out to a party with Alan who got so drunk off his behind he tried to take advantage of her in the backyard, the very location where everyone else designated as the dumping ground for passed out partygoers. Her emotions were still frazzled over having almost been raped if it hadn’t been for Aishah McCoy interfering, and now that she was back home where it was safe she was forced to face another danger…this one being by the hands of the man she’d give anything to welcome back within her body again. “I w-was…”

Heath slowly inched out of his chair, his eyes not leaving her as he straightened up to tower over her. He had always been a giant compared to her petite height but right now it never appeared so threatening. Heath’s frame was so tense with rage he looked like his next move was to grab her and give her the ass whooping this side of the 21st century has never discovered before.

Zaiyia could tell by his eyes that nothing she could say right now would be believable to him. She had just done what she promised him she’d never do after her mother abandoned her in his care. Hell, probably right this minute Heath was on the fence about whether or not to call her imaginary aunt to come pick her up and take her back home because she wasn’t his responsibility to look after to begin with. Before Zaiyia had begged and pleaded for him to allow her to stay with him in his beautiful home, and he eventually relented just so long as she followed his rules. One of those rules related to parties, but she couldn’t remember the details to it. Not that it mattered anymore.

“I SAID YOU WHERE THE HELL YOU WERE TONIGHT, ZAIYIA!” Heath yelled at her so abruptly it made her stumble back until her back hit the wall behind her, her arms up to shield herself from any attack he might do upon her. Her obvious state of fear of him didn’t ease his anger though, instead it only fueled it as he growled sinisterly in warning. “If you know what’s good for you, young lady, you’ll answer me right now.”

“P-Please…” Zaiyia managed to whimper out, her eyes shut off from him. She didn’t wish to see him this way though she understand why he was furious with her. He had come home under the assumption she’d be there but she hadn’t been. She snuck out to a party where she had almost been taken advantage of and came straight back home to walk in on him waiting. All she wanted was to go to bed and wake up to see Heath’s face on her pillow and allow it to erase those awful memories of Alan, but no, she was greeted immediately with another side of Heath she didn’t wish to be around. “Stop shouting, Heath...”

“FUCK THAT!” Heath retaliated viciously, pointing a long finger at her. “THIS IS MY HOUSE, AND I’LL YELL AS MUCH AS I DAMN WELL WANT TO!”

Zaiyia covered her face with her hands the moment she realized that she was crying. Ashamed of being seen like this, she furiously tried to wipe them away, but they just kept forming. God, how was she going to explain this to him? He wouldn’t believe his yelling could be the source of her tears because he’s yelled at her before in the past. So, then what could be her excuse now?

Not having a believable excuse, Zaiyia knew she had to get away from Heath or else she’d start bawling in front of him. Deciding to ignore his deafening rant, she took off for the kitchen to make a quick escape to the guest house out back where she lived. If she had known him any better at that point she would have expected him to catch her the way he did.

“HEY! GET THE FUCK BACK HERE, ZAIYIA!” Heath shouted after her before lunging forward and grabbing a hold of her wrist. Yanking her back into the living room and against his tall hard frame, he spun her around to face him with the intention of giving her a good shake for scaring the life out of him by disappearing with no clues as to what happened or where she had gone. In those many hours he felt like he might as well have lost his life as he wandered his house like a ghost contemplating on whether or not he should call the police and file a missing person’s report. “DON’T YOU DARE TRY TO WALK AWAY FROM M-”

Zaiyia couldn’t hold it back anymore and let out a mix of a heartbroken sob and a small scream. The outburst was so loud it cut Heath off and stilled his massive body. Unable to rein her emotions back in or keep herself upright, Zaiyia crumbled to the floor on her knees and allowed her sobs to erupt from her tiny form as she curled into herself.

“Zaiyia…” With his anger now put on hold by the intensity of Zaiyia’s agonized state, Heath dropped to his own knees beside her to console her frantic state.” Baby…what is it? What’s wrong?”

Heath knew this had nothing to do with his yelling. His Zaiyia was a strong young woman and could take being yelled at for bad behavior. Hell, normally she’d be yelling right back at him! And yet tonight she reacted as if she was a little kid. No, this was big, much bigger than him. At this point his hands had been hovering over her shaking frame, afraid to touch her in case he wasn’t welcomed to, but her heartbreaking wails were causing his own throat to feel a little constricted. Not being able to take her pain any longer, he lowered his hands down and placed them on her, guiding her into his arms so he could cradle her close and let her cry her anguish out now that he was there to protect her. “Shh, come here, baby. I got you now. It’s all going to be okay.”

“NO!” Zaiyia screamed out, her hands pushing against his chest before forming into fists and beating on him as hard as she could to cause him every amount of pain he caused her in the duration of their relationship. “NO, THIS IS ALL YOUR FUCKING FAULT, YOU FUCKING SELFISH BASTARD!”

Smoothly, Heath dodged her swings without any concern for his own safety. If she managed to strike him at anytime it still wouldn’t gain his attention. Her blows were nothing compared to his own so he wasn’t in any real danger from her tiny fists bouncing off of his massive chest. “Wha-”

“IF IT WASN’T FOR YOU I WOULDN’T BE IN THE SITUATION I AM RIGHT NOW! THE WHOLE SCHOOL WOULDN’T BE TRYING TO WHOOP MY ASS AT EVERY TURN AND ALAN WOULDN’T STILL BE CHASING AFTER MY ASS!” Zaiyia screamed up at him through her long black braids decorated in small golden cuffs that shined beneath the lamp light across the room. Her face was drenched in tears, but she didn’t care if it affected her makeup. “IF IT WASN’T FOR YOU I WOULDN’T WELCOME THE BEATINGS I SUFFER THROUGH JUST TO MASK MY OWN PAIN WITH THE ONES THEY INFLICT ON ME!”

“I didn-” Heath leaned back from one of her fists trying to make contact with his face. “Baby, I need you to calm down! Please, you’re gonna make yourself sick.”

“I’M ALREADY FUCKING SICK THANKS TO YOU! I’VE STRUNG ALAN ALONG TOO FAR THINKING I COULD CARE FOR HIM JUST AS MUCH AS I CARE FOR YOU! DON’T YOU SEE? I’M TRYING TO ERASE YOU DAMNIT!” Zaiyia shrieked up at him just as he grabbed a hold of both of her wrists and restrained them down so she wouldn’t be able to lash out at him anymore. “I'M TRYING TO FREE MYSELF OF YOU! WHY WON’T YOU LET ME GO!? WHY!? WHY!? TELL ME WHY, HEATH!?”

“Shh, baby, enough.” Heath cooed to her as he began to rock her in his arms hoping it would help soothe her pain. He rested his head on top of hers for awhile as he whispered words of comfort, occasionally pressing a lingering kiss to the top of her braids. He didn't want to address everything she just said...not now, not ever. That was all behind them now, a thing of the past to never occur again. “Calm down, you’re gonna be okay?”

“N-No…” Zaiyia wailed against his chest as her tears soaked into the material of his shirt. She shook her head in denial to his soft assurances as she lost the strength to fight with her fists. As they fell limp in his hold, she felt him release them, so they could fist themselves in his shirt instead. “Nothing will e-ever be okay again.”

“Don’t think like that.” Heath warned her, lowering his head further down to kiss her forehead, and rest his cheek against it. His hand ran up and down her back while the other kept her firmly against him. “You’ll be right as rain when you calm down, I promise.”

Maybe he was right. Maybe he wasn’t. Either way, Zaiyia chose to ignore him and cry her pain away until there was nothing left within her but silence. Reticence weighed heavily on the couple’s shoulders as they sat locked in an embrace for a long time. It no longer became a comfort to be in each other's arms for them but now more for their own selfish needs to touch each other. This was as close as they’d allow themselves to go, and as far as they could enjoy.

Heath had his face buried in her long black braids when he softly whispered to her. “Where did you go, Zaiyia?”

Letting out a weary sigh, Zaiyia opted for telling him the truth. She was too emotionally and mentally drain to keep him out. “A party.”

In a split second, she felt Heath’s magnificent body tense back up in anger all over again beneath her touch and immediately regretted choosing the honesty route.