Like I Would


I spent my entire morning bawling while going over funeral details, knowing that tomorrow I’d be saying goodbye to the most important man in my life. It would be small – there weren’t too many people we had been terribly close to, and while the announcement was up in the post office since Monday it still hurt to think about what was going to happen tomorrow. I hadn’t even had the strength to call Linda or Jordan and tell them. Likely they already knew anyway, but I knew Linda would have appreciated it coming from me.

I ate a quick sandwich for lunch, before deciding to lay down and have a nap. While I hadn’t woken up during the night I hadn’t slept too terribly soundly, so between that fact and the emotionally exhausting morning I was done for.

When I woke up, there was knocking at the front door. After stumbling around for a bit and nearly tripping down the stairs I wiped the sleep out of my eyes, racking my brain to try and figure out who on earth would be stopping by to see me.

With a deep breath I got up and walked toward the front door, and with another opened it. The person on the other side, however, stole much more than those two breaths from me.

It was Marc. In the flesh, and standing not a foot away from me.


“Carly… Carly I’m so sorry,” his voice held a million apologies as I was pulled into his embrace, relishing the feeling. I’d missed him so much, and somehow as surreal as this moment was, it was still a million times better than I had ever imagined.

“It’s… I’ll be okay Marc. Eventually,” I allowed, a tear escaping from my eye. Marc immediately wiped it away, just as he always had, and then I realized just how awkward we were around each other. While we were still tight in each others’ arms, reality was soon sinking in.

“I’m glad to hear that,” his voice was soft as we each took a half-step back, putting a slightly less intimate distance between us.

“Uh, come on in,” I gestured toward the living room, and after slipping off his flip-flops Marc did just that. He stared around, almost in wonder as he made his way to the couch, soaking in every detail of the place he had frequented so many years ago.

“It doesn’t look like anything has changed,” he allowed quietly, and I nodded.

“I know, that was my first thought when I got back too,”

He sat down, and without a thought I settled onto the cushion beside him. It was somehow still habit, and he wrapped his arms around me again.

“I just… I can’t believe he’s gone…” Marc choked slightly, and I realized he was doing everything in his power to keep from crying.

This was my Marc. A person so much a part of me that our pains were shared, not individual, just as they had been years ago. It was like stepping back in time eight years but somehow not moving a muscle.

“Me either,” I admitted, finally allowing the tears to flow freely as we broke down together. There was a feeling of security to Marc being there, one that hadn’t existed since we’d left each other’s lives. It was the first time I’d felt okay enough to cry like this, and rather than fight it to the last tear I let them come.

“I’m so sorry I wasn’t here Carly – I should have been visiting him or helping him,”

“It’s not your fault Marc,” I insisted, sobbing my words out.

“But I should have been able to at least say goodbye. And thank him,” Marc continued, and I felt myself break a little more.

“I didn’t get to say goodbye either. Not really,” I admitted to him, and felt him pull me tighter to him.

“I’m so sorry, I wish there was something I could do…” he sniffed, trying to get control of himself once again, while I merely shook my head. I’d learned the hard way life had it’s own way of doing things.

“It’s okay. I’m just glad you’re here now,” I whispered, and saw surprise register behind the hazel depths of his eyes. It was slow to come, but a little tug at the corner of his mouth was there, the hint of a smile yet to come. He kissed the top of my head then, and pulled me tight.

“I’m not going anywhere,”
♠ ♠ ♠
Hi guys!

Sorry for being essentially on hiatus again :S things have continued to be topsy-turvy in my world. But I really miss writing and posting for you guys, so I am going to try and make more time to do that. It's been hard to be creative the past month or so due to everything else, but I definitely don't feel like myself when I"m not writing
So here is a very short chapter, and I will have another one out tomorrow! Thanks so much to everybody who is still willing to stick with me and read my stories
- Hayley