Home, Sweet Home

I had a major hangover on Thursday. I didn’t puke or anything but I was definitely holed up in Lily’s room all day. She forced a bagel on me around noon. I may or may not have put half of it in the trash when she wasn’t looking.

“So why do you work in a bar?” I asked as Lily sat next to me.

“It was convenient and it was the first one I got accepted for. I make quite a bit from tips so I figure it’s better than working at McDonalds.”

After our conversation, Lily tried to drown me. She literally poured water into my mouth when I told her I didn’t want anything to drink. After that I willingly drank the water.

Friday was spent packing for Funtown. Ian borrowed a camper from someone he knew, so we were going to camp at a random camp ground between Funtown and Old Orchard Beach. Lily and I really wanted to go to the beach and there was the Maine mall not far and Lily needed bras. The downside of being well-endowed is that you need to go to Victoria’s Secret in order to get a bra that fits. Thank god I don’t have that problem.

We had to get up at 5am for the two hour drive to check in to the campground. Then we had to just chill until the park opened at ten. We ended up going to IHOP. Lily and Ian ordered pancakes but I couldn’t do it I just ordered eggs and bacon. I did however take a picture of Lily’s pancakes and sent the picture to Phil.

I got back an “IHATEYOU”. Orange juice came out of my nose.

“The burn! Oh the burn!” I said causing everyone in the restaurant to look at me.

I then sunk down in the booth and refused to come back up until everyone that saw me left. We ended up staying at IHOP longer than we intended to but we had gotten caught up in conversation.

We had to stand in line for what felt like forever but it was worth it because today was going to be fun. Whether it was actually going to be fun for me or not as Lily said before going into the park. I’m not all that big on rides.

Lily was forcing me on to all of the rides and we absolutely had to go and do all if the water slides on the Splashtown side. Even the Twister which I had a feeling that I was going to fall out the open side of the cone. The last time I was on it we got so close to the edge that I cried. In actuality we were probably like twenty feet from the edge but I don’t want to talk about it.

We hit up all of the rides. Even though I don’t like rides, I was glad that they made me go them. It would have been boring if they left me to wait for them while they went on the rides.

Around noon we changed into our bathing suits and got in one of the pools to start out with. There were a bunch of really obnoxious guys that kept catcalling and whistling to Lily when we got in and out of the pool.

“Hey baby I can make you wetter than that pool.” said the shortest one who acted as the gang leader.

He was like six inches shorter than me.

I hid my face in my hands and slowly sank into the water. I was seriously contemplating drowning myself. Jeez I wish Dan was here he would protect me. Scratch that, he would probably just laugh.

We tried to ignore them but when Ian noticed them he got out of the pool.

They didn’t see him coming so when Ian blocked their view of Lily and me they were taken aback. Ian was a head taller than all three of the guys and the short on only came up to his pecks.

“Leave my sisters alone. They aren’t interested and they never will be.” said Ian in a scary voice.

Ian wouldn’t have been so intimidating if he hadn’t have been going to the gym every day for the last year, but because of Ian’s new found muscles and the height he had on these guys, they tucked tail and ran.

“The little one looked like a scared Chihuahua.” Lily said in my ear.

Lily and I couldn’t help but giggle at their quick retreat coupled with Lily’s comment. When Ian got back into the pool with us, we let him in on the joke and he joined in on the laughter.

“Okay, I didn’t know I was that scary but I guess they won’t be bothering us anymore.” Ian said.

Lily seemed a little off but I think it was because Ian called her his sister. Lily and Ian sitting in a tree k-i-s-s… okay, I’m a five year old. At least I didn’t say that out loud…

We got out of the pool and decided to do some of the water slides. While walking around trying to decide what to go on first, Lily was insisting on The Twister, I heard a familiar voice. When I turned around I saw where it was coming from. A strawberry blond girl in a black one piece came running toward me.

“Sam!” said the girl barely managing to stop before running into me.

“Violet? I can’t believe I’m seeing you here.” I said slightly surprised.

“I read your new post. You’re really selling that lotion you wrote about. You should be getting paid. You’re such a good writer.” She said.

“Thank you. We need a fourth for the twister do you want to come with us? This is my friend Lily and my brother Ian by the way.” I said pointing to the two.

“Yeah just let me ask my mom and then I’ll be right back.”

Violet ran off and a few minutes later she was back.

“My mom said yes. Let’s go!” she said grabbing my hand and pulling me to the ride.

We had lots of fun hanging out with Violet. She and Lily forced us to go down every slide… twice.

When we go to the black slide I realized something. I can’t got down dark tubes. I’m claustrophobic and the irrational fear of getting stuck halfway down the black tube was ever present.

Violet seemed to take quite well to Ian and Ian to her. We traveled from slide to slide with Lily on my back and violet on Ian’s back. Lily would only give me one piggy back claiming she wasn’t strong enough to carry me. I call bullshit.

Splashtown closed at six so the four of us changed out of our bathing suits and into our regular clothes.

Violet insisted that we all go on the Dragon’s Descent which was the one ride I absolutely refused to go on when Lily tried to drag me on to it, but something about the look in Violet’s eyes kept me from resisting. I wish I had never got on that ride.

I peed myself. I don’t want to talk about it.

When we got off the ride, Violet came up to me.

“Wow I guess you really did need to pee.” She said with a sweet smile.

I glared.

Violet thought it was hilarious while Lily grabbed her shorts and threw them to me. I ran to the bathroom with Lily not far behind me.

“Lily, I don’t have underwear. What am I supposed to do?”

“Go commando.”

I made everyone promise that this never happened and no one was ever to bring it up again. Lily named it the Dragon’s Descent Incident. I hit her but she hit me back harder so I just glared at her. I’m so gonna get her back for this.

Ian was good about it and didn’t say anything. He wet the bed until he was fifteen because of a reoccurring nightmare about clowns and I kept it a secret even from Lily so he wasn’t going to say anything about it. He knew the embarrassment.

Violet or the other hand couldn’t look at me without giggling but she swore to never tell a soul and I told her the next time she’s in London, I’d introduce her to Dan and Phil. She wasn’t coming back until the end of next school year so I figured I had time to figure out how to set that up.

I ended up having a very awkward walk back to the car. Something about not wearing underwear in public just felt wrong. I know no one knows unless I tell them but that doesn’t make it any less awkward.

We met Violet’s parents at the entrance. They seemed very nice. When Violet went to the car, her mom told me that she hadn’t stopped talking about the girl she met on the plane since she got back from London. Apparently her parents knew who Dan and Phil were and she told them about my blog and how I had actually met them. Her mom actually started reading my blog. I was flattered but it was very awkward which increased the awkwardness of not wearing underwear.

Violet’s dad was really nice too. He and Ian got on the topic of football and we lost them a few minutes into meeting them. Lily seemed quieter than usual but there are times when she is uncharacteristically quiet. Those are usually the moments when I am uncharacteristically not quiet.

The ride back to the camp ground was one of much Sammie teasing. Mostly about how every time we came out the end of a waterslide I got flipped off the float as soon as we hit water. That and the face plant I had when I was trying to get out of one of the pools. I luckily landed in the water and not on the cement.

When we got back to the camper we didn’t do anything except go to bed. Lily and I got the big bed and Ian had to sleep on the pull out couch. He was always bad at Rock Paper Scissors. He picks rock every time.

The next day we decided on the beach instead of Funtown again. Lily and I laid out on in the sand and about every twenty minutes or so we would go into the water and cool down. I love the ocean. For some reason it’s just so calming. I need to go and visit Zoe when I get back to London.

Ian got invited to play beach volleyball almost as soon as we got there. I caught Lily watching him more than once. She tried to pass it off as her checking out the other guys but none of them were attractive at all. Then again I don’t find anyone attractive when I compare them to Dan.

I took a lot of pictures. I got a really cool one from under the pier. My taking pictures then turned into a photo shoot of me and Lily. My Instagram is going to look so cool with all of these new pictures.

Luckily nothing embarrassing or painful happened at the beach except for getting sand in uncomfortable places and what felt like molten sand under our feet. I somehow managed to escape drowning, sharks, and killer waves all in one trip to the beach.

The beach day was fun but I did end up turning a little pink so we had to leave before I turned into a lobster. Lily on the other hand turned a little more than pink. I felt bad for her because she was going to be trying on bras the next day and I could just imagine the pain of lacy things scraping across sunburnt skin.

The ride home from the beach was actually quite quiet. Lily and I had a very relaxing day and neither of us really felt like doing anything but be lazy the rest of the day.

I let Lily shower first. Ian and I decided on where we wanted to go for supper. The only thing we could agree on was pizza. We got three.

One BBQ chicken for Lily who is a weirdo although I like it too but I won’t admit it to her because it’s more fun to tease her. I got just cheese. Lily and Ian were sure to tease me about being boring but I didn’t really care. Ian got meat lovers and there were bound to be lots of jokes about how Ian likes meat in his mouth.

Ian left to go and get the pizza and milkshakes around the same time Lily came out of the bathroom. I went in and took a quick shower. I just wanted to get the salt out of my hair and get the sand out of the places sand should never be.

There was a shower spider in the shower but it was little and it didn’t move. That doesn’t mean I didn’t keep a very watchful eye on it. If it so much as twitched I was out. On the other hand, thankfully I didn’t scream and no one had to see me naked.

Ian came back a little while after I got out of the shower. He brought in the three pizzas, three milkshakes; peanut butter for Lily, vanilla for me and chocolate for himself, and a few bottles of soda and a bag of ice for the cooler.

We ate in silence and none of the jokes I anticipated were actually used. Although usually they were. It seemed that no one wanted to break the silence. It wasn’t uncomfortable but it was still odd. I think Lily is still a little sad that Ian thinks of her as a sister.

After eating Ian and Lily went for a walk. They invited me but I told them I was tired. I actually wanted to call Dan. He and I hadn’t talked since Lily and Ian took me out. I was starting to worry that something was wrong.

The phone rang but was quickly sent to voicemail. He ignored my call. I waited a few minutes to see if he was going to text me and tell me why but nothing came. I called again. This time he picked up.

“What do you need Sam?” he didn’t seem too happy to hear me.

Something in my chest tightened but I didn’t let it show in my voice.

“I was just calling to check in. If you busy you could have just texted me after I called the first time.” I said letting some of my anger in.

“I’m… in a meeting. Look I need to go. I’ll call you later.” He said and then hung up on me.

I sat on the end of the couch and pulled my knees into my chest. I frowned down at my phone. I don’t like grumpy Dan.

I debated calling Phil but if Dan was in a meeting then it was likely Phil was too. I figured I could call and see. If he didn’t answer I wouldn’t call him again.

Phil picked up on the first ring.

“I thought you had died or something. You could have at least texted me.”

“In a thirty-six hour span of time?” I asked.

“You never know. You could have been kidnapped or had a pancake overdose or a giant meteor could have killed you. Just text me more often.” said Phil.

“Yes mom. How are things at home?” I asked.

“Boring. We miss you.” said Phil.

“It didn’t seem like Dan did when I called him a few minutes ago.” I said not really meaning for Phil to hear it but he did anyway.

“What do you mean?” he asked.

“I just tried to call him and it rang twice and he ignored my call. So I waited a few minutes thinking that if he was busy he would text me and let me know or something but when he didn’t I called again. When he answered he seemed very annoyed.” I explained.

Phil sighed.

“You know what’s going on with him, don’t you.” I said.

“Yes.”

“But you can’t tell me.”

“Yeah.”

“I wish you still sucked at keeping secrets.” I said.

“Really because then Dan would know your secret.” Phil replied.

I could hear the smile in his voice.

“Okay never mind. Continue on with you secret keeping ways.” I laughed. “So what’s Dan’s meeting about?”

“What meeting?” Phil asked.

“The one Dan said he was in when I called.” I said confused.

“Sam, Dan is in the gaming room. Plus its eleven pm here.” said Phil.

“Idiot!” I exclaimed.

“Who? Me?” Phil asked.

“No, me. I forgot about the time difference.”

There were a few minutes of silence between us while I tried to wrap my head around what was going on.

“Did I do something to make Dan mad that I don’t know about?” I asked.

Phil sighed and my heart dropped.

“Dan has been in a permanent state of existential crisis since Thursday. If I knew what was going on in his head I would tell you but I have no clue… but it may have been something I said… about you.” said Phil.

“What did you say to him?” I said, my mind instantly going to the worst. Phil telling Dan I like him. It would explain why Dan was attempting to ignore me. Then I remembered Phil had just basically said Dan didn’t know about my stupid crush.

“I didn’t tell him your secret but it’s part of what I can’t tell you. I’ll talk to Dan and see what I can do but don’t call him for a couple of days or at least until I know what’s going on with him. Oh and just because you shouldn’t call Dan doesn’t mean you can’t call me. I expect daily texts. It’s boring here without you and your pancakes. And one more thing, don’t send me pictures of pancakes. I hate you for that.”

“Will you forgive me if I make you midnight pancakes when I get home?” I asked.

“Maybe.” said Phil.

I knew that maybe was a yes.

“Okay, I’ll talk to you later. Bye.”

I hung up the phone but I didn’t get up off the couch. Instead I wrapped my arms around my legs. What could Phil have said that would make Dan mad at me? Was Dan actually mad at me or just in a grumpy mood? Why do things between me and Dan have to be so complicated?

I stopped myself there. No I can’t think about this. I need to do something to get my mind off it. I grabbed my headphones and my phone and headed for mine and Lily’s bed. This was the only thing I could think to do. I set everything up and laid back on the bed. Before my head hit the pillow, music clouded my brain.

I pictured a black pool of water and the melodies and harmonies and beat were all fingers making ripples. I watched as one of the notes made zigzags across the water and how the beat was like a rain drop making a circular ripple effect. Her voice cut through the ripple and it was like the water was dancing.

Soon I was drifting off into dreamland where the picture of the water dancing grew more vivid and then changed altogether.

I don’t know when Lily and Ian came back but I was asleep and neither of them woke me. Honestly I am glad for that. I slept until the next morning.

Monday morning was the day we were going to go home, but first we had some shopping to do. The people that we had to check in with said that the spot was free for the rest of the week so we paid a small fee so that we could leave the camper there and come back for it in the afternoon. The guy agreed and we were off to the mall

Shopping was actually quite successful. Lily bought two bras but she gave me her credit card and made me pay for them so she didn’t have to think about how much she was spending on them. She made me promise not to tell her the total. It was over a hundred dollars but this was the only place that carried her size.

I went into a few stores and I found this really comfy gray chunky cable knit sweater in one store. I found a plain black long sleeve shirt and a few t-shirts at Brandy Melville. They were so soft and I wanted to buy them all but I settled for five of them. I got a gray long sleeve and the t-shirts were black, cream, and light gray. Ian grabbed the navy one I was about to put back. He saw how it pained me to be putting it back.

“I’ll buy it for you. Think of it as an early birthday present.” I shushed him when he said the dreaded “b” word.

Ian got stuck carrying all of the bags but he didn’t complain. He actually seemed to be enjoying himself. Although I could have sworn that I saw him looking at Lily’s butt. Does my brother have a crush on my best friend? Nah, he probably just thinks she has a nice butt. I mean lots of guys look at her so I wouldn’t be surprised but it is kind of weird.

Around lunch time I went into the food court and grabbed something to eat. Ian and Lily went off and said they were looking for something specific that I didn’t pay attention to. I decided on the Chinese food they had. It wasn’t great but it was better than greasy pizza with extra grease.

When Ian and Lily came back, they got some food and then we headed to Bath and Bodyworks which is something they don’t have in the UK and the website doesn’t ship to the UK either. I could always have Lily ship it to me but I like to pick things out myself so I know what they smell like.

I ended up spending way too much on candles and lotion. I was going to have to have Lily send the package to me anyway. I bought four Eucalyptus Mint candles and four Mahogany Teakwood candles. Those were my absolute favorites and a few others that I thought smelled nice. When these candles are gone I’m going to have to have Lily pick some more up for me.

I was very thankful that Ian was carrying all of the bags because those candles were heavy and I knew I would probably end up dropping them.

We somehow managed to fit all of our shopping in the trunk of the car along with all three of our duffel bags. We had to play trunk tetris to get everything to fit but we did it. We climbed into the car proud of our packing skills and headed to get the camper.

Before leaving Portland, we stopped at a FedEx place so that we could send the candles to the flat in London. We had to do two boxes because it all in one exceeded the weight limit. I bought too many candles and I don’t regret it one bit. I was preparing for fall and summer wasn’t even over yet.

The car ride was a long one and we all took turns driving. Ian and Lily did the interstate driving and I did the back road driving. I was slightly out of practice because my car in London is for driving on the left side of the road where as this was for the right side. That and I haven’t really driven much because I hate driving in London and I can just walk to work so I don’t need it.

When we go home Lily had fallen asleep. Ian carried her up to the bed then he and I unloaded the shopping bags and mine and Lily’s duffel bags. Once we were done I said goodbye to Ian and went into the apartment.

I grabbed my suitcase from Lily’s room and started organizing it. I made a clean side and a dirty side and I made sure to keep all of my clothes in my case because I didn’t want to leave anything here. It would be a pain in the ass for Lily to send it to London.

I added my new purchases into my case and then zipped it up and brought it back into Lily’s room. I didn’t want to wake Lily so I went and laid down on the couch. Both of us ended up sleeping though the night.